


Whatever happens winners aren't afraid of losing

by brightsummernights



Category: Glee
Genre: 3 Sentence Fiction, Abortion, Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Alternate Universe - Criminals, Alternate Universe - Football, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Hunger Games Setting, Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Twins, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Alternate Universe - Zombies, Angst, Apologies, April Fools' Day, Arachnophobia, Arranged Marriage, Beaches, Blind Character, Blindness, Bromance, Bullying, CSI: NY - freeform, Cancer, Character Death, Christmas, Coming Out, Crossover, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cutting, Depression, Dogs, Dom/sub Undertones, Drabbles, Eating Disorders, El Clásico, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, FIFA World Cup 2014 - Freeform, Fast and the Furious series - Freeform, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Football, Friendship, Gary Sinise - freeform, Genderswap, Healing, Heterochromia, High School, Homophobia, Horses, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Inspired by Fanart, Inspired by Music, Inspired by Photography, Kid Fic, Letters, Light Dom/sub, Loneliness, Love Confessions, Lucy Hale - Freeform, M/M, Magic, Marriage Proposal, Minor Violence, Mpreg, Neighbors, Nerdiness, Nervousness, Nightmares, Non-Graphic Violence, Norway (Country), Not Canon Compliant, Not Klaine Friendly, Not Kurt Friendly, One-Sided Attraction, Original Character Death(s), Past Abuse, Past Character Death, Past Rape/Non-con, Pen Pals, Post Mpreg, Pretty Little Liars - Freeform, Prostitution, Protectiveness, Relationship(s), Reunions, Romance, Royalty, Secrets, Self-Harm, Sex Talk, Slut Shaming, Soulmates, Spiders, Summer, Swimming, Swimming Pools, Tattoos, Teen Romance, Threesome, Trust, Trust Issues, Violence, Weddings, Werewolves, Winter, dance, football - Freeform, lol Kurt Hummel, lol klaine wedding, movie theaters, movies - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-03
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-02-11 22:46:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 72
Words: 98,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2086002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brightsummernights/pseuds/brightsummernights
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"If Sebastian thinks it’s hot, he is compeletely wrong."</p>
          </blockquote>





	1. ♥

 

Girl, I beI en thinkin' 'bout us  
And you know I ain't good at this stuff  
These feelings pilin' up won't give me no rest  
This might come out a little crazy  
A little sideways, yeah maybe  
I don't know how long it'll take me but I'll do my best  
  
You'll be my soft and sweet  
I'll be your strong and steady  
You'll be my glass of wine  
I'll be your shot of whiskey  
You'll be my sunny day  
I'll be your shade tree  
You'll be my honeysuckle  
I'll be your honey bee  
  
Yeah, that came out a little country  
But every word was right on the money  
And I got you smilin' honey right back at me  
Now hold on 'cause I ain't done  
There's more where that came from  
Well you know I'm just havin' fun, but seriously  
  
If you'll be my Louisiana  
I'll be your Mississippi  
You'll be my Little Loretta  
I'll be your Conway Twitty  
You'll be my sugar, baby  
I'll be your sweet iced tea  
You'll be my honeysuckle  
I'll be your honey bee  
  
Your kiss just said it all  
I'm glad we had this talk  
Nothing left to do but fall in each others arms  
I coulda said "I love you"  
Coulda wrote you a line or two  
Baby, all I know to do is speak right from the heart  
  
If you'll be my soft and sweet  
I'll be your strong and steady  
You'll be my glass of wine  
I'll be your shot of whiskey  
You'll be my sunny day  
I'll be your shade tree  
You'll be my honeysuckle  
I'll be your honey bee  
  
You'll be my Louisiana  
I'll be your Mississippi  
You'll be my Little Loretta  
I'll be your Conway Twitty  
You'll be my sugar baby  
I'll be your sweet iced tea  
You'll be my honeysuckle  
And I'll be your honey bee  
  
I'll be your honey bee

Blake Shelton - Honey Bee


	2. Purple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "If Sebastian thinks it’s hot, he is compeletely wrong."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always wanna give strong warnings so now I'm saying that in this part Hunter has uncomfortable feelings because of slightly sexual touching. It's almost literally just feeling, but personally I found it bit distressing and I wanna avoid triggering people.

First it’s just amazing that Sebastian wants him. Their limbs are tangled together and he is brushing other boy’s hair. Hunter’s heart is still beating like crazy and when he touches Sebastian’s hip, skin is sweaty. Hunter has to smile to purple marks on smooth skin. Everybody would see them in the dressing room. They wouldn’t know but Hunter could fantazise about really belonging to Sebastian.

“Go”, Sebastian snaps suddenly and he has to swallow bittersweet feeling. It’s over now until next time. Sebastian’s bed is forbidden place after sex. no matter how cold and used Hunter feels. He limps slowly to his own bed and collapses there holding his pillow like it would give some comfort. Hunter is too exhausted to move, he would take shower next morning.

He doesn’t really feel comfortable, when it’s time for next Warbler-meeting and Sebastian demands Hunter sit next to other boy. They are listening to Jeff complaining about something what Nick had done. Dark-haired boy is throwing dark glances from the other side of spacious room but Hunter is sure they can solve this little drama and in twelve hours they would be as lovely as before.

He has no energy to be interested. Same has been seen so many times before. Suddenly he is more aware of his surroundings, when fingers are stroking his inner thigh through thick fabric. Sebastian’s profile is all casual even though his touch is way too close to Hunter’s crotch. He doesn't like it. Holding hands or even his knee would be ok but this...

If Sebastian thinks it’s hot, he is compeletely wrong. He knows they aren’t couple but still some things should be just between two of them. He doesn’t want Jeff or Nick to see how other boy’s touch affects him. It’s embarrassing. Sebastian may be pervert who thinks publich touching is okay but Hunter is still new in this. He has class, taste and limits.

“Excuse me... I’m not feeling well", he escapes and hears Jeff’s questions. “I don’t know”, Sebastian answers. “Sometimes his damn mood swings are like living with a girl.”

Later in the evening it’s not Sebastian who comes. It’s Jeff, Jeff who is natural cuddler and who doesn’t push people. They aren’t any besties, Jeff is more like Sebastian’s friend but he doesn’t refuse human presence and body heat. “Sebastian is an ass”, Jeff starts about half an hour later.

“Great that you noticed it damn blond." Jeff snorts but stays calm. “I talked to him and he isn’t pressuring you anymore. Sebastian wants your thing to be good but because of his limited emotion range, he doesn’t know how to show feelings properly. He wants to try, though.”

“I’m not a girl, I don’t need romance shit. I just wanna be more than fuck toy. I don’t... Oh fuck, it was so stupid”, Hunter mumbles and is terrified, when tears are burning in his eyes. Jeff pats his back. “I noticed Hunter. Sebastian wasn’t really trying anything, he... He wouldn’t ever force you.”

“Maybe we moved too fast. Or something.”

“You guys did. We had been together six months before having sex. How long it took from you? Three hours? I’m not judging, because it's not my business, it could have worked if one of you was less hot-headed.” They are quiet. Hunter does something what isn’t usually allowed and brushes other boy’s hair. Jeff just smiles. “Sebastian will stay in our room this night. He wants to give you some space. We can cuddle whole night and watch stupid romcoms.”

Next day Hunter is guided to the backyard of the school on lunch time. Sebastian is waiting there with picnic basket and cutely cheesy red and white blanket. Jeff can’t hide his smile when he introduces them formally. “Welcome to your blind date mr. Clarington. Feel free to do a reclamation, if your companion acts inappropriately. Hopefully you’ll enjoy.”

“Hi! My name is Sebastian.”


	3. You'll be my soft and sweet

He is straight. He has a girlfriend back home, sweet and gorgeous Lauren with her long, red hair, mint green nail polish and pretty blue eyes. He likes girls, their curves, their colourful clothes and adorable laugh. He is completely straight until he transfers to new school and meets his new roommate, one and only Sebastian Smythe.

“What a pleasant view.” Hunter is changing into his pyjamas, when door is opened and joyful voice greets him. He is trying to find sarcasm – a joke, but can’t do it. Green-eyed tall boy is serious, even though playful smile is dancing on his lips. He has no idea how to react to Sebastian and it’s later a relief to notice that there are others, who are just confused every time, when Sebastian is around.

They are staring at each other until Sebastian bursts into laughter. “Take it easy new boy. I'm not hitting on you. It was a simple compliment.” Hunter hadn’t really thought that getting to know his roommate would be like this. Sebastian is sunny, relaxed and maybe even funny. He has no filter.

First meeting is easy. Hunter knows he is capable to do all of it alone, but feels anyway warm and fluffy, when Sebastian decides to take new guy under his wings. He is introduced to Warblers and everything with them is enjoyable. They are taking music seriously but it’s always fun.

He finds his role with the group and in the school. Sebastian is still teasing Hunter whenever he is hanging around shirtless but it makes his lips to curve to little smile. Weeks are soon months and he learns that sunshine called Sebastian has one weakness. One fucking Kurt Hummel.

They are on and off. Every time when Kurt has problems with Blaine, he runs to Sebastian’s arms. “I think it was just friends with benefits at first, Clarington”, boy tells. They are spending quality time together. Movie is running – something with explosions and Bruce Willis, but boys aren’t paying attention.

“Now I have to deal with all this feeling-shit and it’s not easy anymore. Kurt is wild cat in bed but he is also much more. I’m scared of it how weak he can make me.”

Sebastian is serious with his watery eyes. Hunter wants to do something, anything to have his sunshine back. Maybe it’s some subconscious motive, he doesn’t know but it takes only seconds before he is kissing his roommate and best friend.

It has been a week since he last time called Lauren. Her texts have been bit cold.

Sebastian is gentle with him and Hunter isn’t scared. It’s Sebastian. Sebastian who wakes him up on Saturdays by singing shitty pop songs in the shower. Sebastian who secretly loves all kind of tv-shows, where pretty cats and panicky horses are saved from difficult places. Sebastian who ignored his tears in front of math homework and taught him more than any teacher ever.

“I don’t want you to be hurt”, Sebastian whispers, when Hunter is drifting to sleep. They don’t talk about it next morning. They should. It’s happening again and again. Hunter’s head is mess, all of Sebastian, his scent, his skin, his face, rhythm of his steps, everything makes Hunter dizzy. He is used to have control of everything in his life and now one puzzle piece doesn’t accept that.

He breaks up with Lauren on the phone. It’s rude and horrible but at least it’s finally done.

He doesn’t know how to react when that stupid engagement happens. Sebastian’s lips are just determined line. He could break any moment and Hunter doesn’t know what he wants. Shouting everything aloud would open knots inside of Sebastian, but what would happen after that? “You can use me, if it helps”, he promises. It’s only safe thing to say. Anything else would lead to too deep things. “No.” Kiss on his cheek is burning but it gives some hope. He hasn’t lost everything, not yet.

Sebastian is gone. For two days Hunter is waiting for him. He doesn’t feel ridiculous at all, when he is squeezing one of his roommate’s sweaters. It gives comfort and hope that Sebastian would come back to his crushed world.

He wakes up on Monday morning, when something is dropped on his stomach. Hunter is sleepy and confused, when he takes the envelope. Flight tickets, two passports, even his own. He is so fascinated by the papers that at first he doesn’t notice tall, tired figure.

Sebastian is smiling. “Good morning Sleeping Beauty. Start packing. We are going to visit my aunt in Paris.” He wants to ask questions, dozens of questions of it where Sebastian had been, what is happening, what about school or parents – he can’t just escape to Paris but other boy ends his rambling with a light kiss. That makes his stomach feel really, really weird.

“Shut up. I have taken care of everything and we aren’t going to travel around the world. Short trip is okay.”

“You know what this is, Hunter? This isn’t perfect lovestory or fairytale but I can give you so many things and I’ sure we’ll have great time together.” He knows and understand. He is second choice for Sebastian. It’s not what he wanted but it’s life and he is going to take it.


	4. Cat person

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> " Hunter really isn’t used to talk with females who are three times smaller than him."

“Why are we doing this?” Hunter asks seventh time, when he closes gates to the local day camp. He is shuddering. Hunter may be a snob but at least among his own people he knows all the basic rules and best ways to cheat in the game.

“We are nice guys now, Hunt. Volunteering at kids’ day camp gives us good reputation and it looks even better in university applications.” Hunter rolls his eyes. He has sudden urge to check if Sebastian’s forehead is hot. That doesn’t sound like Hunter’s boyfriend. He probably loves Sebastian more than anything (His cat is good competition), and one of Sebastian’s best sides is his attitude. Hunter and Sebastian aren’t good guys. They are selfish assholes who have great sex life together. Hunter has always been able to breath in other boy’s company. He doesn’t want to see Sebastian as a scout.

Many things are happening at the same time across the area. Young blond girl is guiding little girls, who are trying to give commands to fat, spotted ponies. Hunter isn’t actually bored, he is awkward but still he can find something familiar in ponies’ faces. Bit older girls are painting. Their object is probably flat and boring field at the background of camp and Hunter can’t understand what’s so fascinating there. But he anyway decides that painting or any other art in strong quotation marks wouldn’t be his business. He has bad habit to do different silly things for Sebastian but messing his expensive clothes with sticky paint isn’t one of them.

Too happy-looking woman comes to greet them. Hunter is keeping his ears shut, when they hear too long and too boring story about whole history of that stupid camp. Sebastian on the other hand is ideal listener. He hums with apprectiation, nods like eager puppy, agrees with everything and even asks questions.

That can’t be Sebastian. Guys from New Directions have kidnapped real Sebastian, Hunter decides. They have taken his sexy, sarcastic, wonderful boyfriend and are torturing him with horrible things right now. To replace Sebastian they had sent this lifeless clone. He has to stop planning how to save real Sebastian, when woman is asking what they would like to do.

Sebastian is almost immediately going. He is talking about his sports career and pointint at little boys, who are playing basketball. Sebastian gets easily a permission to go to help basketball guys with children and woman doesn’t look so warm anymore, when only Hunter is left. “How about you my little friend?” Hunter is nobody’s little friend and if he was embarrassed earlier, now he is pissed. “I don’t like art”, he tells carefully. “I have no enough patience for the combination of kids and sports, so how about if I just walk around and check if anybody needs help or advice?”

“What are you doing here then?” woman’s calm eyes are asking but Hunter doesn’t care. He came here for Sebastian, he doesn’t have to be perfect little helper, he can just look busy and keep his boyfriend happy that way. Later he should investigate this clone-Sebastian closer and find a way to get his intelligent hottie back.

Hunter wanders around the area. There are so many happy and cheerful people. Everybody is active and doing something creative or sporty. He wants to clear his throat and tell some facts about life to girls, who are following basketball game and commenting Sebastian’s ass in low whispers. It’s pretty ass, 10/10 easily and looks so good in those horrible shorts but that ass belongs to Hunter’s boyfriend. It’s not anything some stupid girls could enjoy for free. Finally he calms himself down. They can watch, but not touch.

One of the girls at the painting place is approaching him but Hunter makes sharp turn and manages to avoid it. He needs some place to hide. This is ridiculous and horrible. Hunter isn’t that kind of kid, who can just go to stupid camp and adjust immediately. He is sure that clone-Sebastian will dump him after that, and he can’t ever find his real boyfriend who will face horrible end.

Then Hunter spots hiding place. Little stands next to now empty football field. Here he could see everybody before them seeing him. Later it would be possible to slip into crowd and Sebastian wouldn’t ever know about his little escape.

Except that someone is already hiding under the stands. It’s little girl, who has scarred knees, thin almost white hair and yellow t-shirt. She looks like stereotypical day camp participant but her face is so sad that it almost aches Hunter’s usually cold heart. His empathy skills aren’t best, Sebastian is typically only one who can get him worried.

It’s not useful to stop. Girl has already noticed him so he keeps going and sits next to little figure. He is trying to find right comment. Hunter really isn’t used to talk with females who are three times smaller than him. Something about the weather? No, that kind of talking Hunter saves to his 90 years old and almost deaf grandma. Comment about the camp and atmosphere there? He would probably say something that isn’t good to so young ears and anyway it looks like girl wouldn’t be interested.

He takes his phone out of pocket to have something to do with his restless fingers and girl blinks, when she sees Hunter’s background picture. He hasn’t showed it anybody except Sebastian. It’s cute shot of Mr. Puss sitting in the spot of sunlight

“My kitten died yesterday”, girl tells. When Hunter checks more carefully, he can notice red eyes and feels sympathy. He can’t imagine life without Mr. Puss. He gets death threats from Sebastian every other day but Sebastian wouldn’t ever hurt him like that. “What happened?”

“She stopped eating and moving and then she just died. My mom said that we can take take new one but I don’t want new, I want Saphire back.” Girl sounds upset but she isn’t crying. That is a relief for Hunter. He couldn’t deal with tears. “I would feel the same if Mr. Puss died. Saphire… Saphire surely liked you. It’s also sad that you can’t be together anymore. But Saphire doesn’t want you to be sad. Listen to your mom. When it’s easier, you can go check other kittens and find one, which needs a home and nice owner like you.” Hunter isn’t sure how much his little friend is listening but she is smiling again.

“It’s a shame to waste nice day in this dusty place. What would you like to do? I’ll come with you.” Promise widens her smile and girl takes Hunter’s hand. “I wanna paint nice picture of Saphire. What’s your name? I’m Anna.” It comes casually and naturally. Hunter is bit jealous of that careless attitude only kids can have. It would be lost in few years. And okay, he didn’t want to have anything to do with that damn painting but that promise would be broken because of Anna.

Hunter’s shirt has blue stains hours later, when he demands reason from Sebastian once again. Boy’s smile is all hot and all Sebastian and yeah, maybe his real boyfriend has been brought back. “Isn’t it nice to confuse people and yourself? I think it’s awesome as long as it doesn’t become a habit. I wasn’t planning to spend my whole future here.”


	5. Trophy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He is fucked up, exhausted."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit depressing atmosphere, few thoughts of self-harm and suicide.

He is fucked up, exhausted. He apologizes, plays nice guy without any heart and is able to cheat everybody. Hummel gives him half-smiles, when they spot each other. All he wants to do is sleep until his graduation but Sebastian has to keep his mask. So he is kinda there, talking to his school mates and they accept him. Or at least they are acting like that but he can hear those quiet whispers. Spoiled bitch. Useless slut. Asshole. He is so used to those words that he simply stops caring.

In the summer he fucks Anderson. He wants to feel something, anything. He doesn’t want to be tired and empty. Blaine is laying there legs open and is similar like always – blushing, shy, boring even cock deep inside of him. Exactly two weeks later he sucks Hummel’s long neck in the backyard of Scandals. Hummel is looking for revence and sounds pretty when Sebastian is pushing inside. He is better fuck than Blaine and Sebastian almost feels something when those lustful eyes are saying sensitive things.

They take his captain position, only thing that still mattered. He is playing cool, keeping his posture without looking at new guy. He can’t lose control now. Sebastian is so ready to hate new captain – he can’t really do anything to make Hunter’s life difficult, but hate is always hate – it keeps him alive. But then open hand is there. It’s peace offer before war. His eyes are wide and calm like sea. Sebastian is staring, he could drown in that gaze without regrets but he can’t be that weak now. Hunter has to be faking.

“I want you to be my co-captain. I’m sure you have ideas, you can help me get to know the guys and then we are going to plan things. Together Sebastian. It’s best way to success.”

Hunter is weird, he makes a conclusion. He is so different than anybody Sebastian has met before. Hunter is gentle guy with short temperament. He makes some of them cry and brings apology chocolate next week. Anybdy can’t predict him.

Sebastian is wondering what would be best way to commit a suicide. His parents decided his problems needed therapy. Therapist is alcoholic and Sebastian bribes the guy. 100 dollars every week for a right to spend 45 minutes in mall wandering around. He is staring at glass walls and wants to know how much cutting your wrists with shards would hurt.

Sebastian goes home to visit his mom and dad. There he doesn’t feel judged. He saddles a horse, strong and stubborn black mare called Storyteller. He can let horse run and his mind is happily empty. It’s better than usual dark fog.

In the evening he snuggles to the corner of the sofa with big mug of hot chocolate. Sebastian can sense his mom’s eyes examining his relaxed features. “I met a boy”, he tells carefully. He wants to share this thing but some questions would be too much.

Carolyn Smythe is suprised. She raises one beautiful eyebrow. “What kind of boy is he?”

“Hunter is calm. I… I think he likes girls. I’m not trying anything or embarrassing myself. I just want to be near him.”

“It’s okay Sebastian. You should get more friends.” Sebastian doesn’t know anything about friends but maybe Hunter could teach him.

When he gets back to Dalton, Hunter is already in deep sleep but there is pink note on Sebastian’s pillow. _I hope you had good time. Coffee tomorrow?_ Coffee date on every Tuesday is their tradition, so it’s possible that something had happened. Hunter doesn’t break his habits easily.

It’s his stupid girlfriend, Maddie or Miranda or Mia or something. Sebastian has learned this thing, he hasn’t ever listened properly, when Hunter has had monologues about this awesome naturally beautiful cheerleader. His automatic, aprobative sounds have kept boy perfectly happy. Mia-Miranda-Maddie has found new guy. Hunter is upset, Sebastian can even see one tear on his cheek. He is good friend, promises to take Hunt out to clean his mind and gives him bro hug, when they are leaving the place.

Later they are sure that somebody had slipped something to Sebastian’s coke. He wouldn’t have been so intoxicated without that. Man is old – simply too old and scary, when his hands are caressing Sebastian’s body. “Fuckable little thing. I have toys to use on you.”

Sebastian doesn’t know where Hunter, his only hope is. His mind is so damn foggy that he doesn’t really realize what is happening. He could end up being raped, more than once.

Man and his company  learn to know that even though Hunter isn’t biggest guy, he is most furious and fearless. Red-eyed attitude gives him extra strenght. Men are pushed away and strong, steady fingers take Sebastian’s hand. “Come, we have to go.”

It’s near but they can make it to Hunter’s car. Hunter turns on the engine and grabs extra blanket from back seat. “You are too carefree with yourself, Seb.” Sebastian doesn’t remember last time when somebody has used nickname of him. Leaning his head on Hunter’s shoulder feels natural.

Something is different after that. Hunter hasn’t usually been physically affectionate but now Sebastian notices that other boy is paying more attention to him. He finishes choreography and suddenly warm hand is touching him briefly. _Are you okay?_ Hunter doesn’t say things aloud but them are still there. Or at least Sebastian hopes so. He doesn’t want to imagine this.

He isn’t waiting very much from Hunter but he’d like to have caring person besides his parents. He is again starting to believe that he isn’t bad person. He deserves more than lifelong loneliness.

Passionate and strict but caring and gentle Hunter is last missing puzzle piece in their group. Everything looks possible when they have Sebastian’s creativity and Hunter’s ability to fulfill his visions. Warblers are practising more than ever and everybody sees trophy and prize for the hard work in their dreams. They go step by step, are hoping everything and waiting nothing. Group is humbler than before and it works. Their performances are mind-blowing and flawless. Nights after those evenings are full of hopeful whispers and loud laughing when all excitement is bursting out.

 They get it. They get it all.

Old Sebastian would have chosen trophy before the guy. There could be twelve trophies and half-naked man strippers and his eyes would be still glued on Hunter.

In the backstage he kisses Hunter deeply and passionately. It’s natural next step, not weird anymore. Hunter gives shining trophy to next loving hands and puts his hands on Sebastian’s hips. “You are beautiful. I want you. I would give that trophy and all the glory away for you.” Somebody wants him without reservations. Wants all his flaws and not so good sides. Emotions are overwhelming and uncontrolled but Hunter is there to kiss his tears away.


	6. Sleeping beauty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sleep has avoided Sebastian who is known to be lightest sleeper in whole Dalton."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had tiny mini trip which lasted about 33 hours. During that time I spent almost 20 hours in the bus or train. I’m not good at sleeping in the unfamiliar places and especially train is bad. So last night, when I couldn’t sleep, this was born. I had written basics in my notebook and my handwriting looks quite shaky because of sleep dept.

”Why you thought this was a good idea?” Sebastian complains. It has been already long day for both of them and they still have nine hours in the train before getting back to home.

Hunter had been comfortably in sleep but now he is absolutely awake and perfectly lively. Affection washes over him, when Hunter looks at Sebastian. Last night in the bus had been no good but this is torture for other boy.

Sleep has avoided Sebastian who is known to be lightest sleeper in whole Dalton. His skin looks somehow sticky and dry at the same time and famous green eyes are pale. Hunter has seen all it before. Sebastian feels horrible, his eyelids are heavy and he wants nothing more than sleep but it’s impossible because there is always something distracting him.

“I can’t sleep.” It’s honest, he isn’t playing diva role. Sebastian is frustrated. “Last night was okay. It was just you, your warmth and your limbs everywhere. It was also dark and fucking quiet. But here? No way, when it’s bright like in some sunshineland and people are going back and forth every five minutes and…” He points secretly to young couple with three kids. “I know I’m not fair but… You are always ready to be worried about this kind of stuff, no matter how little or stupid problems I have. It’s adorable.”

If there is something adorable, it’s Sebastian’s absent-minded smile, Hunter thinks. He streches his bit stiff body and yawns deliciously. “You know what I’m going to do babe?”

“What?”

“I will ask if they have free cabins. I can’t understand why we didn’t do it already, when we bought our original tickets. I can sleep anywhere but it’s different with you.” He kisses other boy’s cheek and both of them smirk, when older lady frowns.

They can't find new place even though Hunter asks nicely. Showing his wallet doesn't help He’d like to suggest that they kick some other people out of train but he remembers what Sebastian had said about controlling his nerves and doesn’t do it.

Hunter has anyway ideas, when he gets back. “Take my seat”, he says to Sebastian who hadn’t found space for his long legs on the aisle seat. He sits down and gives Sebastian more instructions. “Put your head here.” On Hunter’s lap. Sebastian is horribly tired but wink is there.

“I’m not blowing you in the train”, he says using just so loud voice that earlier woman can hear them. Hunter smiles shaking his head. Sebastian is impossible and that’s why Hunter likes him. “Just do it babe.” Sebastian is laying on his side and he has to bend his legs but that way Hunter can give him more comfortable position than before.

He takes his soft scarf and covers Sebastian’s tired eyes with it. “Just sleep. Focus on me. We are back in our dorm, it’s absolutely quiet and you are my big spoon. My hair smells like your shampoo and I’m warm in your embrance. You are happy and relaxed. Next day is Saturday and we are going to have a date. Not anything special, just movie and junk food, but for us it’s perfect.” He is using gentle, low voice, almost whispering peaceful things to Sebastian and Hunter can feel how other boy’s body relaxes.

Finally Sebastian is sleeping and Hunter glares murderously everybody who passes their seats and soon people are walking much more carefully. Later he is still holding Sebastian when both of them wake up.


	7. Rock your world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Somehow Mr. Puss accepted Sebastian."

They have taken Hunter away from him. Finally Sebastian met somebody who got it all, who was always there and took everything what Sebastian gave. Hunter was his rock and without him Sebastian is again falling. His mouth has bitter taste, when he remembers serious talk from his father.

“Look son”, David Smythe had said his hand heavy on Sebastian's shoulder. “I understand that young men are doing mistakes. It’s nothing new. You should have seen me and uncle James, when we were seventeen. I’m gonna fix this situation and your future will be bright but that young man has to go. He doesn’t have good influence on you. I understand that you like boys, it’s not my business at all. But you have to choose boy who can meet your standards. Our standards. Smythe standards. I’m not sure but I think that I met in last week’s conference that one guy, whose boy has had a boyfriend. I will search his phone number and kid can visit us in the summer.”

Sebastian said nothing. He would fuck that bi-curious kid and dump him next morning. Father would think twice before introducing Sebastian to other Smythe standards boy. When David Smythe had ended his little speech, he hugged Sebastian manly and said goodbye with fast words. Sebastian was numb, when he went back to their – now his dorm.

It was already cleaned. They had been fast. Hunter’s side of the room was empty, not even white cat hair. Only thing left was box for a cat. Mr. Puss glared him, when Sebastian kneeled and peeked in the box. There was a note with Hunter’s fast, messy handwriting.

_Tiger,_ _Can you take care of him? I can’t take him with me._ _Love always,_ _Hunter_

It wasn’t romantic or sad love letter but it was enough to make Sebastian cry desperately. He disliked cat strongly and it was mutual, so Sebastian was waiting claws and scratches, when he opened box and let Mr. Puss outside. He didn’t get white flash to his face. Instead of that cat investigated whole room. He meowed sadly and curled up on the Hunter’s empty bed looking like he was planning to wait his whole life.

“He isn’t coming back. At least not now. I can’t bring him back to you now, but I’m gonna do it. I just have to get out of this hell hole at first. Then we are free to go wherever we want to.”

Somehow Mr. Puss accepted Sebastian. He noticed that Sebastian wasn’t too different compared to Hunter. He also had soft voice to hum slow ballads to cat. He learned right ways to brush silky fur even though he had to go to pet shop to ask advice from amused older lady. He should have said that cat was gift grom dead grandmother and service would have been much better.

Sebastian remembers all of Hunter. Hunter had clumsy and shy hands and he didn’t know how to hold a man. Sebastian felt like a girl in the bed, when those fingers traced his skin, his inner thighs and hard stomach. He taught Hunter. Other boy learned to know that Sebastian liked changing things. Slow lovemaking was sweet after bad days but sometimes he was just proud to see Hunter’s bruises on his hips.

Once he was terribly sick, just miserable bundle in his bed. Hunter went and made cookies. They were burnt and bad because Hunter forgot few important ingredients but Sebastian still chewed them happily. They had a habit to stay after Warbler practises and sing flirty duets together. Maybe their voices weren’t most perfect combination but Sebastian loved shine in Hunter’s eyes, when sugary words were dropping from his lips.

Sebastian is waken up from his thoughts when two cautious voice are calling him outside of the dorm room. Nick and Jeff, only people he can call friends in this place. He knows what they want to do. It’s familiar from those times when golden couple has had fights of their own. Yeah, it’s possible that Sebastian’s heart is teared out of his chest but he isn’t girl. But there is no reason to be mean to these two good souls, so Sebastian lets boys in and tolerates their fuss. "You are our captain now. We need you. You have to rise Warblers from their misery.”

And who is going to help Sebastian to be happy again? His life hadn’t ever been as complete like it was with Hunter. Sebastian doesn’t open his mouth, though. He cries a little in front of boys. They may be annoying little things but they really mean well, when they wanna watch stupid movie with him and discuss if Jake Gyllenhaal or Heath Ledger is cuter in Brokeback Mountain. In the end all of them are sobbing for the movie and Sebastian announces that boys will be dead, if he ever hears about this evening anywhere outside of his room.

They survive. Sebastian teaches Warblers that they are above of the rumours. They are better than that. They would be shining again. Group is stronger together and they are protecting each other. Besides mentoring his group, Sebastian has also other plans. His dad things that Sebastian is going to follow Smythe rules by studying law like all other Smythe men inclunding his dad, older brother and uncle James. He could have done that before losing Hunter but now situation is different. Hunter was taken away from Sebastian so David Smythe would lose his golden son.

He wouldn't have access to family money after father would hear about his little trick so Sebastian does everything possible. He stores cash and calls his grandmother who hasn't ever been biggest fan of her son-in-law. Sebastian wants to do this alone but it's good to know that somebody is on his side. He would have plan B.

On gradutiation day his car is already packed. Mr. Puss is sleeping in front seat in his box with his little cat toys and Hunter’s old sweater. Sebastian has found two dark blue Dalton-sweaters under Hunter’s bed and hided them without second thoughts. Hunter isn’t gone, his clothes are still there and it gives illusion of comeback. That illusion has kept him alive in last months.

He hugs Nick and Jeff tightly and refuses party in the same evening. “What’s wrong?” Jeff asks his eyes wide and innocent. Sebastian hesitates biting his lip and reveals his plans. “I will use summer to find Hunter. They can do anything to keep him from contacting me but I have to see it with my own eyes. It takes few days before my father is here and it's better if you don't answer his calls at all.”

They are sceptical. Like other people, they had thought that Sebastian was over of Hunter. He was just special bump on his rocky road but no. Nick and Jeff are anyway ideal listeners because both of them are old romantics in their hearts. “You have to inform us how it is going. We want to know everything.”

“I wish all the best. You and Hunter weren’t cute but you were special. He was your home and safe haven and you were same for him.” Sebastian is crying when he finally leaves hugs still warming his body but now he is totally sure. He would find Hunter. If it was needed, he woul check every fucking house in this country.

It’s as difficult as he thought. Sebastian knows lots of people and it’s skilled to get to know more. He can have small talk about anything but it takes weeks before he is speaking to somebody whose boyfriend’s cousin’s friend knows somebody in Hunter’s school. “He isn’t in town anymore”, girl tells. “He graduated. It was rumoured that his grades weren’t good enough but you know, that guy has some serious issues and they wanted to get rid of him.”

It sounds exactly like Hunter.

“Where is he now? Does anybody know?” Sebastian has to speak to new person again, this time big and muscular guy who has tough, blank face. “Clarington had a gay thing he was looking for. He left right after the graduation. His dad wanted to beat the shit out of him, but Clarington was luckily already gone.”

This is stupid and ridiculous. He asks if guy has Hunter’s new phone number but no, it’s clear that he had wanted to burn all the bridges. Hunter has anyway new FB-profile. Sebastian is about to send friend request but doesn’t do it. It’s a sign if he can achieve Hunter there where he thinks other boy is.

He has a feeling that this can’t wait. Sebastian drives until he has to stop. He knows it’s not exactly wise to sleep at the parking lot but he is too tired to function so Sebastian just lays under the blanket.  Wake-up would be three hours later. He could grab a coffee on the journey. He grabs. It tastes even more disgusting, when liquid is cold but at least it has caffeine in it. Mr. Puss's meow is disapproving when Sebastian offers tuna fish from his baguette. He has nothing else even almost cat-suitable left.

He is there. Looking almost algid in his leather jacket and white sweatpants. It’s their spot in the yard of Dalton. There they shared lunches and watched sunrises after early practises. Sebastian was standing exactly there when he realized that Hunter was more than new glorious conquest.

“I’m sure they think I’m some weird drug dealer. It’s probably miracle that anybody didn’t call police yet. We could have done this easier way but I was sure that you could find me." Sebastian listens his calm words but scar is first thing he really notices. It goes across of his left cheek. Hunter follows his eyes and touches skin with bitter smile. Mark has been taken care of well, Sebastian can see that it's possible to cover with make-up but he is still upset. Somebody has hurt his Hunter. 

“One of the assholes had problems with my “disgusting and sick gay-obsession” like he cutely called it. Hunter had been defending him, Sebastian understands. On normal day it would make him feel girly but now he is too emotional to feel anything except gratefulness for this amazing, strong boy, who has believed in him.

“I have nothing”, Hunter tells. “My car, few boxes, nothing else. Father was ready to pay my studies if I would have been “good son” but I’m not denying myself anymore. I did it enough before you tiger.” Sebastian kisses him finally and presses their foreheads together. He brushes scar on Hunter’s skin sensing how nervous and tired other boy is.

“I have plans. Plans with you and your damned cat. Don’t worry.”


	8. I'll be your shot of whiskey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fact is that if you are looking for Huntbastian, you can find lots of fics with d/s-themes and I have nothing against this, everybody can write and read whatever they want, but it's not my own cup of tea and that's why I wrote this one. In this fic I try to give my own interpretation or version of these two. Both of them are too proud and too independent to be controlled in any way. 
> 
> Title borrowed from Blake Shelton's Honey Bee.

Hunter is ready to destroy when he meets ex-captain of the Warblers. He knows everything about effectivity and leading but he doesn’t really get music, so displaced king would still have important role as Hunter’s little helper.

It’s not so easy anymore, when they are actually face to face. Years of training and he almost whimpers, when guy shakes his hand smiling coolly. Sebastian’s grip is steely and Hunter knows this king wouldn’t fall without a fight. Adults are smiling – they are sure Hunter is solution to everything and boys hear praising words distantly.

“You wanna fuck me”, Sebastian announces, when adults are finally gone and they are left alone to talk about their plans. Hunter coughs and this isn’t going to right direction. He has to stop this. Hunter scans his new co-captain critically. Sebastian Smythe is tall guy in good shape. Boy looks like a runner. Instincts are guiding him and Hunter notices that he could take Smythe down in a fight.

Nobody told Hunter that Smythe is gay and he would have wanted time to prepare for this. “I don’t do dicks and I want your mouth shut right now or I’m reconsidering co-captain thing.” His voice is steady and calm, he sounds like he is ready to fulfill all possible threats but Sebastian just smirks. “You wanna fuck me but it’s me who is going to fuck and you will be begging more.”

Hunter swallows heavily. He shakes his head and decides to try again. “Okay maniac. I don’t simply care. Flirt as much as you want but we are going to talk about music and you tell about Warblers. I want everything. Their weaknesses and strenghts. I have to know them so I can find best combinations.”

Of course asshole is also his roommate.

Few weeks Sebastian is actually okay. Clothes are kept on and nothing really shameless happens – Hunter can stand it when other guy goes to bathroom without shirt. He is almost funny when he isn’t flirting all the time. But of course he should have understood that it was just calm before storm. Suddenly Sebastian is everywhere. Hunter wakes up green eyes in his mind and allusing words in his ears. Too much bare skin, too much unsaid things. His head is spinning and Hunter knows he is screwed when he is considering fucking-idea again just to get it out of his head.

They do it. First time is fighting for control – both of them are stubborn and scared to let anybody near themselves. Hunter bites his lip so hard that it’s bleeding and allows Sebastian’s hands and hips. He has taken worse in military academies. Sebastian isn’t exactly gentle, Hunter doesn’t get comforting kisses and he isn’t held near of other body but he notices that he gets careful treatment. Sebastian isn’t causing extra discomfort.

It becomes some kind of stress reliever. Hunter knows he has bit too much on his plate – Warblers and pressure to success, swimming team where his motive is to keep his body and help in competitions and of course school work. He accepts nothing except row of perfect grades. For years Hunter was used to sleep into his pillow because of pure stress but he doesn’t need anymore. Now Sebastian is there and is willing to offer sweet emptiness.

Then he tries to relax absolutely. They aren’t using words, fingers touching skin are enough. Sebastian notices how Hunter’s body is asking and responds immediately. They get closer to each other. Sebastian slowes down and kisses corners of Hunter’s mouth affectionately. He takes his time caressing him with short pecks and Hunter is waiting patiently.

Sebastian explodes his world. Hunter has been with girls, he has shared soft kisses and heard tiny sighs but it’s different with Sebastian whose hard body won’t give up. After that Hunter just tries to find his breathing again. His skin is tickling, his whole body is numb and he hasn’t ever felt better. Teeth marks colour his shoulder and Hunter smiles, when Sebastian kisses bitemark. “Sorry. I think moment kinda took me.”

Hunter turns to his side to see Sebastian’s face. He is still same boy, confident one with burning soul and bad attitude but he hasn’t ever been so relaxed in the company of Hunter. Suddenly emotions are overwhelming. Hunter has been taught to run if fighting isn’t possible and he really tries, but it’s hard when his legs are shaky and strong hands are pulling him back.

“Was it too much? Are you hurt? I’m sorry…” His sob stops Sebastian’s rambling.

He is pathetic.

“You don’t own me.” Sebastian tenses behind him and fingers touch his sweaty stomach. Green-eyed boy sighs and positions Hunter better onto his lap. “It wasn’t about owning you or showing where your place is. You drive me crazy every day but I love your pride. We are similar there.”

Hands are reassuring him and Hunter smiles to fast lips touching his neck. “My motive was to show that it’s not so dangerous if everything doesn’t go like you have planned it. It’s your life Hunter, you can just live it. You don’t have to control every little detail.”

“Well, I learned your lesson, so you can go now, please.” Hunter’s voice is calm and restrained. He knows Sebastian is insulted but trusting would mean too big things. Hunter isn’t ready. His mind is too big mess and it’s clear what he needs now. Sebastian goes and doesn’t come back that night.

It’s like greeting an old, dear friend when Hunter jumps into water next morning. It’s still early, he is alone at the pools and it’s good, when he swims endless laps. Over and over again. Water strokes his sensitive and sore body, there are still memories of Sebastian all over his skin. He wouldn’t know how to explain marks if somebody saw them.

He continues to avoid Sebastian. They are too polite, too cool in Warbler-practises and in their shared classes. Of course boys are wondering, they notice seriously everything. Hunter isn’t poking Sebastian with comments like usually, half of it serious business and half just teasing between some kind of friends and captain doesn’t get sarcasm from one of his shiniest stars.

So of course they are pushed in empty classroom and locked there. Warblers have seriously seen too many movies full of clichés. Hunter wants to fight, he wants away, away from Sebastian, his serious eyes and low voice. “Babe.”

“I’m not your babe.”

“No, but you could be.”

“Why? So you could tell everybody how you tamed captain?”

“If that is really so big deal for you, I can give myself now and here. You can have me on the desk. Kinda hot idea actually”, Sebastian says looking proud of himself. Hunter is forced to smile. He has missed Sebastian’s easy attitude.

He gives in. It’s too big temptation that somebody else could share his pressure. Somebody could offer support, when Hunter has mountains to climb. “Fine then. Fine. We can watch what this is going to be but I have rules. You can go out to dance and have fun but you aren’t flirting with all innocent boys who don’t know you. We aren’t hiding in front of guys but not any kind of lovely couple-stuff. It’s our business, not their entertainment.”

If Hunter wasn’t so self-conscious, he would enjoy victory. Sebastian is wordless. It doesn’t last long, though. Or there isn’t any actual words but his steady gaze tells enough. _“Thanks for trusting me. I won’t betray you.”_


	9. Extremity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sebastian doesn't really know much about Hunter's narrow-minded family full of assholes..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stacey is my dear own character. I have written her in some of my Kurtbastian-fics but this is first time with Stacey and Huntbastian. Of course there are also other characters I have pulled from my imagination but Stacey is only one I have really thought about.

Hunter’s car is crawling. Every painful moment takes him closer to Dalton and safety. Hunter hates to see his hand shaking, when he touches swollen side of his mouth. Father had hit him without hesitation. Hunter had been laying on the floor and then kick to side had send furious sparks through his whole body. Broken rib wouldn’t suprise him.

Finally he is there. Gates are closed behind his car lights and Hunter can breathe. Here he would have control again. Father wouldn’t hurt him here. He is repeating those things to himself but it’s still impossible to loose his grip of steering wheel.

Cars are parked around him and after some time his school mates notice that Warbler-captain isn’t okay at all. Hunter blinks to the knock on the window and turns his head. It’s luckily Jeff who isn’t difficult person at all. He opens the door and then just sits there staring at blonde boy. “Get Sebastian!” Hunter hears somebody screaming, when his body gives up letting him faint to Jeff’s arms. Other boy is struggling with his captain’s weight.

“Hunter? Baby?” Voice is familiar, like cool liquid in his burning ears. Sebastian doesn’t ask questions, he just takes Hunter's weight from Jeff and leads him to the school building. “Gonna take you to nurse. Your face needs cold.” Hunter whines, when brisk Sebastian accidentally shoves him. Boy stops taking a long, suspicious looks at his shaky figure. Hunter gives in when Sebastian reveals his bare side.

His side is interestingly colourful. It looks sick and aching. “You have been kicked babe. We’ll talk about this later, when she has decided if you have to be taken to hospital or not.”

Hunter doesn’t tell truth in nurse's room. He admits fight and violence, yeah but doesn’t report his father. Situation is already big enough mess. He is bit embarrassed, when Sebastian is there sitting behind him and listening carefully. It has to be clear for ms. Jameson what they are but she doesn’t look bothered.

“You will be all right. Take it easy for few days. No exercising. I’m sure you are in great hands.”

Sebastian’s hand is commanding on his arm. Hunter isn’t left alone and answers are demanded from him. They sit down in the corner of library. It’s quiet. Most boys are in their dorms preparing for new week. Just few Warblers are reading magazines and Sebastian waves to them smiling happily. He doesn’t want to have extra conversationalists right now.

“I told dad about us. I have no family anymore.” Hunter curls up in a small ball and Sebastian’s hands are stroking his back. Them are strong and calm. Hunter shouldn’t like that touch. Everything would be still okay if he didn’t. But he just can’t resist. He is wrong, he isn’t good son but for Sebastian he is the best.

Hunter has done everything right. He has been family pride without any distracting emotions. He had imagined that maybe they would allow this one mistake slip. This one lack in his personality. He had told about Sebastian in excited voice, eyes pleading acceptance. He hadn’t gotten what he wanted but it was familiar for Hunter.

His cheeks are red, when Hunter remembers how father was destroying his bedroom at home and yelling how he didn’t have son anymore. Luckily his most important stuff is in Dalton but Hunter was desperate when he tried to save some of his things from his father’s rage. Now back seat of his car is full of silly stuff like old cat toys and swimming prizes.

He gets loving shower where Sebastian washes him carefully. Other boy’s hand is resting on his hip and Hunter considers it for a moment but doesn’t invitate Sebastian closer. He is sure Sebastian would happily do all work but he just isn’t on the mood.

Later he is dressed in soft pyjamas and positioned in the bed. It's Sebastian's bed and both, bed and pyjamas smell like his boyfriend. Hunter is warm and safe and almost sleeping, when he hears quiet voices from door. “Boys brought cake”, Sebastian tells. Usually Hunter doesn’t do cakes. Both, he and Sebastian are quite pedantic with food. They have junk food date once a month and that’s usually enough. Now cake isn’t just cake. It’s warm wishes, friendship and love. Warblers want their fearless leader to be good. Cake tastes chocolate and mint in Hunter’s mouth.

“I called my dad. You are coming with me tonight”, Sebastian says on Friday morning. Hunter’s stare is blank. He looks at his math homework with blind eyes and moves his gaze back to Sebastian just because other boy looks so warm and lively. Hunter has shivered every night this week. He has slept against Sebastian’s chest wearing his boyfriend’s old, worn and comfortable Paris-sweater.

“Where?” His voice is raspy and tired. Hunter doesn’t know how to cope. He can’t continue like this, without guilt he has skipped Warbler-practises allowing Sebastian to lead them. Even his damned school work has suffered, his answers haven’t been as detailed as usual because Hunter hasn't had enough energy to reading.

 “My home. My parents are both there and my sis is also coming. They wanna meet you.”

“What will you do, when they don't like me?” Hunter is afraid of this plan. He is used to have big family, lots of cousing, aunts, uncles, loving and warm people. After his failed home weekend, week has been full of desperate phone calls. Hunter went systematically through his contact list. Most of them didn’t answer. Aunt Susan said he was shame to his family. Uncle Jesse was most friendly. He suggested that maybe it was a phase and everything would be all right, if Hunter just took back his words and apologized.

Only person Hunter can completely trust is his high school boyfriend and everybody knows that high school love isn’t meant to last. Last piece of his safety net would be gone with Sebastian.

“They will love you. They accept me, so they accept you. Stacey says you look like a lion cub, dad wants to hear everything about your sports achievements and mom is probably already preparing huge meal for you.”

Hunter is once again unsure when they are leaving and Sebastian looks at his clothes. He has white t-shirt and old jeans, his typical outfit, when formal Dalton-blazer isn’t needed. “What?” tense Hunter snaps and Sebastian makes uneasy suggestion. “Do you wanna borrow few of my shirts?”

It’s bad. Hunter knows painfully well that his parents are librarian and teacher and compared to usual Dalton-student background it’s nothing. But he had thought that Sebastian didn’t care. Now he wants to dress Hunter to his expensive clothes to make him more suitable boyfriend so maybe, just maybe he could pass and be accepted.

Hunter wants to throw up. Their relationship isn’t like that. It’s compromises, fights, tears, love, hugs, kisses and understanding. It’s not about changing him to some quiet and nice nerd who uses shirts more expensive than Hunter's parents’ food bill from whole week.

In normal situation bubbling would lead to dramatic comments and fake insulted feels but for once Sebastian is mature. “Didn’t mean it like that babe. You know I don’t care.” Hunter is pulled close Sebastian’s chest. He sighs breathing other boy’s scent. “I’m just worried of you and I wanna do everything to make this easier for you. My fearless soldier isn’t like this.”

Hunter knows he is glaring at them and behaving like nervous child when he would love to hide behind Sebastian. First one to greet him is Sebastian’s mom. She is delicate and smells like flowers but it’s easy to recognize dark shade of her hair and deep greeness of her wide eyes.

“I made cookies, honey. Bas texted your favourite food earlier today.”

 “You shouldn’t have...”

 “Not anything like that, dear. It’s exciting to meet Sebastian’s boyfriend. Worth little celebrating too.”

They exchange some pleasantries. Sebastian’s dad asks about Hunter’s swimming and he tells, once they have gotten over of few things (Mr. Smyth... Call me Michael kid.) Sebastian is following their interaction closely. It’s good to see how Hunter’s shoulders relax. He takes more comfortable position in his chair and isn’t so alert anymore. Carolyn Smythe offers coffee and nobody even blinks, when Sebastian takes his place next to Hunter. He wants closeness and warmth and gets those things, when familiar arm wraps around his shoulders.

They have done stuff like that just in their dorm room or their cars. Hunter can’t believe that some people are like this. He can be freely with this boyfriend without being judged. Later he even gives shy kiss on Sebastian’s cheek and only reaction is his boyfriend’s sleepy smile. Fingers brush Hunter’s hair and he has to smile. It’s first real smile after that horrible weekend which had officially ended his childhood.

Hunter can see that Stacey is most suspicious. Of course, she is after all Sebastian’s twin sister and if Hunter was childish, he would be jealous of their relationship. Sebastian would have Stacey until death, there wouldn’t be thing big enough to separate them. He watches smile on his face how siblings hug. They haven’t seen each other for few months. Hunter hasn’t personally talked to Stacey, all she has seen of her brother’s boyfriend have been little glimpses of Hunter’s shape in the background of laptop screen, but he has learned to know that Sebastian and Stacey share almost everything.

Stacey knows about their fights and Hunter’s little, annoying habits. She knows that Hunter is freak with tidiness and that pisses Sebastian off regularly. She knows how Hunter refers to Sebastian’s old lifestyle with men and drinking when he wants to hurt and he has had success with that.

 So it’s like being in trial when Stacey stares at him. “Nice arms. Working out?” She asks eyes narrowed.

 “Gym, swimming.”

 “I see. Bas wouldn’t pick up fatty”, Stacey murmurs to herself and finally hugs Hunter briefly. “He calls me crying even once and your neck will be broken.” Her whisper is so quiet that Sebastian doesn’t hear and Hunter knows words are meant to him.

Stacey is friendlier after that but Hunter notices that his little test isn’t over. He is being flirted with. Her turquoise shirt has all possible class but truth is that it shows lots of smooth, pale skin. Hunter is careful with keeping his eyes where they should be. He snuggles against Sebastian’s side. It’s not typical for him but other boy seems to be pleased.

Sebastian excuses himself to bathroom and Hunter has to meet Stacey’s sharp eyes once again. “So. Do you like boys or are just looking for experiences?” He knows it would be crossing the line for Sebastian. Hunter has lost his family for that boy, nobody should question his loyalty. Stacey seems to realize what she has said.

“So sorry lion cub. I’m just fucking worried of Sebastian.” Hunter doesn’t refuse apology. Stacey has exactly same attitude as her brother. It's possible to see when they are serious and meaning what they say.

Sebastian wakes up alone in the middle of night when his body misses Hunter’s unbelievable body heat. Bed is empty and door is closed carefully. Sebastian should stay in the bed, it’s already cold enough without Hunter but he is curious to find his boyfriend. Hopefully Stacey hasn’t dragged him to hear any horrible threats – Sebastian isn’t blind and he knows his sister, he had noticed those little things earlier in the evening. He knows Stacey means well but it hadn’t been right time for that. Hunter is emotionally exhausted and Sebastian just wants him to have peace for a moment.

Sebastian leaves lights off.  He has walked in these halls all summers of his life, when they were visiting grandfather in USA. It’s chill anyway, there isn’t carpet on hard wooden floors and Sebastian is really considering going back to the bed. This isn’t movie after all, Hunter isn’t kidnapped by vampires or anything totally killing and horrible.

Then there is mumbling and lights in the library. He shouldn’t listen, it’s not meant for him but he can’t stay away, when he hears Hunter’s cracked voice. “My parents wouldn’t ever have done this. Sebastian wouldn’t ever have been welcomed to our house. I... Why is it such a bad thing? Sebastian is good guy and he makes me so happy. Why can’t they accept it?”

“I don’t know sweetie. Maybe your parents are scared of unknown things like it, but one thing I know for sure honey. You can always come here, when Sebastian comes home. Don’t worry about summer, we are going to our Paris-apartment and there is enough space to third kid.”

Sebastian dares to peek and he sees his mom hugging his boyfriend. He doesn’t really know much about Hunter's narrow-minded family full of assholes, but he can guess that Hunter’s own mom hasn’t ever hugged him like that. He hasn’t ever heard his father being proud of him, something what Sebastian hears all the time when he gets good grades or does something interesting in sports or with the Warblers.

Sebastian pretends he is sleeping, when Hunter comes back. It’s comfortable to feel his strong chest and arms and Sebastian wants to push closer than it’s even possible. He can’t promise forever. It would be something what stupid songs about teenage love say, but he would happily share everything what he has as long as he and Hunter would last.

Who knows. Maybe it would be forever.


	10. Helluva life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Red alert, dangerous fire topic, reason of our almost break up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually sequel to one of my Kurtbastian-things I haven't published on AO3 :D But if you really wanna see it, you can check my Tumblr desorden7tm4. This is working also individually quite well.
> 
> This contains Kurtbastian-angst and isn't Kurt-friendly at all. To be honest, Kurt is annoying self-centered bitch in this. 
> 
> Btw, title from Frankie Ballard's song with same name.

For few months everything is again well. Kurt isn’t behaving like uptight bitch but allows me to have some space in our relationship. It’s like old good times, silly date evenings when we walk around in a park hand in hand and eat ice cream. We go to skate and you could imagine that Kurt’s laugh belongs to a five years old kid when he falls on his ass. On our anniversary he makes delicious breakfast and brings pale pink roses. He calls me prince.

Then one Friday I come home after horrible, tiring and difficult working day. My boss had been grumpy because of migraine and I had been forced to take care also of his tasks. Hot coffee had almost caused burns to critical areas and grumpy boss wasn’t exactly happy when I had to wear my sweatpants for the rest of the day.

There is puppy sitting on my damned favourite armchair. Breed is easy to guess because fluffy baby fur has pale shade of gold. Little guy is cute when it stares at me but I haven’t ever seen dog so cute that I would allow it to live in my apartment, walk on my white carpets and expensive wooden floors.

“Kurt! What the hell is that?” My boyfriend is calm and confident when he comes from bedroom to greet me. I notice he is wearing unbelievably tight jeans and deep blue shirt which emphasizes his wide eyes. I also know Kurt and it’s crystal clear what he is trying now. “It’s a puppy.”

“Don’t play with me. I don’t have enough energy for that right now.” Now his body is pressing against mine and long fingers brush my short hair. “I thought that… It would be good for you to take care of living creature. You would get a glimpse of life with a baby.”

Red alert, dangerous fire topic, reason of our almost break up. I can’t believe he is starting this again. He promised. Me or kids. I let him make a choice and Kurt took me. Now he is once again trying to manipulate me in this. “Kurt…” Usually that kind of tone warns him not to push but maybe this isn’t Kurt. My Kurt hadn’t ever been like this.

“Why are you so against it, Sebastian? Don’t you want to be grown-up?” I have permanent job. I’m saving part of my salary for travelling and I had thought that maybe we could spend week at my family place in Paris next summer. I may go out with boys bit more often than Kurt but I have to have my ways to relax and he has no right to call me childish.

 “I don’t like kids like you perfectly well know.”

“You are just scared of responsibilities like always. Don’t you love me Sebastian? Why don’t you want to make me happy?”

It’s same point once again. We haven’t made any development. “I’m not arguing with you right now. You are welcomed to sleep on the sofa this night.” It’s tiny win but win anyway. Usually sofa has been my place after arguments and Kurt doesn’t look pleased.

I kick dog out of the bedroom when it tries to the bed. Kurt had bought it so Kurt would take care of it. Of course it doesn’t go like that. He really waits I’m taking dog out and cleaning all the mess even though my schedule is much fuller than Kurt’s. He is just a diva who doesn’t want to get his hands dirty. Okay, I’m similar in that but at least I hadn’t brought baby animal to our apartment.

Two weeks later puppy is gone. People from animal shelter are happy to take it and smiling girl is sure that so adorable animal would get new home very fast. I’m happy for that. After all dog hadn’t done anything bad and definitely didn’t deserve to be pawn in our war.

Kurt explodes when he gets back home. I’m not listening it when he calls me names and says I’m shitty boyfriend. I’m kinda proud of myself when I can keep my cool by simply walking out of the place. If I really am so horrible boyfriend, maybe it’s time to make those claims true.

I’ll stop at nearest hotel to book a room. I consider calling some of my buddies but I really have a desire to check maybe few of my favourite gay bars and I know guys wouldn’t really enjoy that. So I take a shower and prepare for the evening. My heart is beating like I would be seventeen again and everything feels surreal.

Having unknown people around me hasn’t ever been difficult for me. I dance couple of songs with cute blonde who is waiting for his date. Some older man wants to buy me a drink but that offer I refuse politely.

Then something interesting finally happens. He is eyeing me from the other end of bar counter and is about my age or maybe little bit older. Smile is shy and sexy at the same time and I’m sure guy doesn’t know what he is doing. Predators would eat this kind of cute thing alive. Dirty gold in his hair looks pretty in the lights of the club. “Can I buy you a drink?” he says it sweeter than most of the guys. Usually most confident gay men think that anybody would be thankful for their company but this is different.

I accept his offer and also suggestion to capture one of bit more quiet corner tables. It isn’t awkward at all, just careful when we are examining each other. I tell about myself at first. He gets to know my name and the fact I have finished my studies. I’ll mention my love for peaceful mornings at the gym and old fantasy books but for some reason I stay quiet about boyfriend-fact. He doesn’t need to know, anything isn’t happening I try to tell myself.

His own name is Hunter Clarington. He is same age with me and would graduate next spring. “It took some time to decide what I wanna do with my life”, young man tells smiling. It’s just adorable when Hunter bites his bottom lip. Talking with him is scarely easy. I’m flirting a bit and when other guy blushes, I can see he doesn’t have very much experience with men.

Later he leans himself in my personal space and watches me with strict eyes. Alcohol is colouring them a bit but not too much. “Could I… Could I get your phone number?” _You have a boyfriend. You are in love with your boyfriend._ Or maybe not. “Would you like to come with me?” Hunter’s sea eyes widen and his breathing is sharp. “Yes.”

In the darkness of hotel room his eyes are just scared for few seconds. First time with man is written on Hunter’s forehead. “You know, we don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with. I can give you a kiss and be your big spoon. It would be honour.”

Blush on his cheeks is deliciously rosy. “I want you.” I can feel that when his restless hips push against mine. Hunter is glowing, he has no idea how to handle that pure want. “But… Can you be gentle?”

 “I would be anything for you.”

He had already been glorious with clothes on. White t-shirt showed his muscular arms and jeans hugged his ass but it’s even better when clothes are thrown on the floor and I can kiss his strong thighs and worship flexible body. He moans my name when I take him in my mouth and almost cries when I’m inside him. I give time hugging Hunter tightly and kissing his face. Lips taste salt but actions are wanting. So much want and fire. My blood is boiling.

Next morning smile is still there. Sleepy Hunter with his messy hair reminds me of golden kitten. “Why are we in a hotel room?” His question is tiny, almost scared.

“Because my pissed off boyfriend is at my place.” It’s my fault if Hunter goes now. I hadn’t been honest, I had taken him happily without thinking twice. Hunter just sighs. His hand follows lines of my stomach and chest but touch isn’t sexual. He is just caressing me and in the end Hunter turns so we are face to face. He drops small kisses on my jawline and cheeks.

“A week ago I was planning wedding with my girlfriend. Then I just left. All she got as an explanation was a note where I told I’m not dead and I’ m safe. I changed my phone number and my social media. It was easy. I should have done it a lot earlier. Melissa deserved real boyfriend. My whole life has been waiting so I could wait bit more if you can promise that it doesn’t last forever. Do you love him? Are you serious with him?”

Those are big questions and I know my answers. I had loved Kurt. I had been happy with him but we had been teenagers in the beginning of our dating. Illusion of danger and rebellious relationship had been enough years ago. It’s not working anymore and both of us need different things.

I order and pay breakfast for Hunter before leaving. Kiss on his forehead is almost bittersweet. Other man is scratching back of his neck and I see how awkward he feels when fingers accidentally touch fresh hickey. “Take this.” My scarf would cover those marks if he doesn’t want to show them.

Kurt doesn’t get a word when I open door to our place. He is cuddling with blankets and ice cream on the sofa but he could freely continue that alone. I don’t notice dark blue velvet box before I’m pulling my shirt off in the bedroom. It’s ring box, of course. Them are simple silver, shiny and pretty. Now I’m sure Kurt has lost his fucked up mind. We have problems, we are on the edge of break up and I have cheated on him with no regrets. Then he goes and buys rings.

“I wanna see that you are decicated to this relationship.” His voice is steady and calm. He blocks my way to the door but I’m not really worried. Kurt can be more muscular than in the high school, but he wouldn’t be special opponent for me.

My mind starts processing automatically. I take my biggest suitcase from closet and then I’m just going around room systematically. Some clothes, books, work papers. It’s funny to watch how big Kurt’s eyes are. “What are you doing Seb?”

“I’m not Seb for you and answer to your question, I’m leaving you right now. You have to find another man who can take all your ridiculous demands and work with them. This isn’t a relationship anymore. This is a jail and nightmare. ”

He really tries to stop me. It suprises me how strong and tight his hands are but I can get free of his grip. “Hopefully rest of your life goes well.”

My heart has sick beat when I get back to hotel. I don’t wanna throw all my emotions to his face so I spend good fifteen minutes with coffee and cheese sandwich before going to my room.

Hunter is still shirtless. He lays on the bed looking absolutely comfortable. I let my suitcase drop on the floor and give my question. Maybe it’s silly and happens way too soon but I wouldn’t let him go.

"Lunch next week as friends? I know this really nice place."

"Yes please."

I’m again breathing and crying.


	11. #brotp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hunter Clarington is perfect, adults think. Hunter Clarington is a mess, Sebastian Smythe, his roommate and co-captain knows better."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Self-harming, cutting, blood. Those are my warnings for this one but it's not anything detailed. Something really bad happened to Hunter in the past and he tries to deal with it. 
> 
> But then happier side of this fic, like name says, this is my brotp Huntbastian-thing, so I'm trying something different than usually.

Hunter Clarington is perfect, adults think. Hunter Clarington is a mess, Sebastian Smythe, his roommate and co-captain knows better. He may be military academy dropout but he is still exactly what Warblers need. Sebastian isn’t really sorry when he is dropped from his stand, lacrosse is more his own thing anyway and he is delighted when he gets captain-position there.

Sebastian wants to shoot Hunter, when his screams wake him up. It’s their first night in shared room. New boy had put his clothes – basic t-shirts, jeans and sports stuff to closet and put on some photos (landscapes around the country). After half an hour it had been clear that one of them was neat and one far from that, but he hadn’t been brat about that. Sebastian isn’t hopeless. He had wished good night and Sebastian had answered, already half asleep.

“Shut up!” It’s sharper than he meant and Sebastian can hear how Hunter gasps. It’s wet voice and he is almost embarrassed. Is other boy really crying or at least almost in tears? Sebastian had been six years old when he had last time nightmares that bad.

“Sorry, Smythe. I’ll… I’ll go to bathroom. Need to wash my face.” Maybe Sebastian isn’t doing right thing but he is too tired and his puffy pillow is too comfortable and familiar.

It’s horrible to wake up and notice that Hunter’s blankets and pillow are gone. Sebastian finds them in the bathroom. Other boy had slept there so he wouldn’t bother him so much anymore. There is also few drops of blood colouring the floor but Sebastian doesn’t see anything special in them. Maybe he had had little shaving accident. He cleans stains and makes also other bed.

Sebastian knows that it isn’t enough. He isn’t sure if Hunter has real problems but he has to be better roommate and deal with other boy.

They meet at the breakfast table. Sebastian is sitting there with his yoghurt and some other Warblers. Hunter would like to avoid socializing but can’t do it before boys spot him and call their new captain. He comes with slow steps and they see he has been taking laps before breakfast. He has gorgeous, athletic body, great control of his movements and in different situation Sebastian would try his luck no matter how straight other guy seems to be.

New captain is just watching them with wide eyes. He has nothing in front of him and Sebastian decides it’s good change to be friendlier than last night. “I’ll go and get you something. What do you want?” Other boy looks up slowly like he wouldn’t have heard what Sebastian said. “Can I get some fruits?” Sebastian brings them and tries to smile. Hunter answers to his gesture and breathing is bit easier.

He is eating his precious fruits like a little bird and watching that makes Sebastian nervous. One by one other guys leave to their classes and finally they are alone. He would have exactly four and half minutes to Hunter before he should run. “I’m sorry. For last night. I was surprised and didn’t think what I was saying. It’s good to have a roommate for a change and I don’t wanna make you feel bad about yourself.”

He is embarrassed, Sebastian senses that. “Can we not to talk about it more? I’m thankful for your understanding. I may have similar problems in the future and I get it them should have been explained to you but it’s kinda private thing.” Sebastian just nods.

It goes okay. Hunter adjusts in the school and he is probably so tired that nightmares won’t come back. He has some weird habits anyway. Hunter is running freak and he can be spotted on the track almost every evening but he doesn’t shower in the dressing rooms. Warbler-captain is calm when he comes to their bathroom and Sebastian doesn’t ask questions. Of course reason can be absolutely simple. Maybe Hunter just prefers privacy and doesn’t like dressing room showers but Sebastian doesn’t believe that. It’s something else.

Sometimes he throws up after running. Other boy has excellent physique but he has his limits too. Sebastian just doesn’t understand why Hunter is flirting with them so many times every week.

Few months later Sebastian spends weekend at his parents’ place. It’s good time. He and Stacey take horses out and air is fresh and cool in his lungs. Stacey tells about her boy problems and Sebastian gives sassy comments. They make pizza together and Stacey giggles to his embarrassing stories about Dalton boys.

Nothing prepares him for the catastrophe back to Dalton. Their room seems to be quiet and Sebastian doesn’t remember if Hunter told anything about his plans for the weekend. Maybe he has a date but Sebastian hopes he wouldn’t bring girl without advance warning.

At first he thinks that Hunter has forgotten lights in the bathroom. Door isn’t locked so he just opens it to switch lights off.

His roommate is sitting on cold tiles. Hunter is bleeding. Sebastian has words about accident on his lips but them doesn’t come out when he notices blade. Hunter had done it to himself. “Hunter?” It’s first time when Sebastian uses face to face first name of his captain, friend and roommate. Hunter startles and panics.

 “Go away, Sebastian!”

He isn’t going anywhere. Hunter can push as much as he wants. He is stronger than Sebastian, but Sebastian has enough strength to keep himself in the situation. In addition his blood staining Sebastian’s shirt really bothers Hunter.

It bothers Sebastian too. A lot actually. Seeing blood is one of his secret fears besides spiders and big dogs. Now there is so much blood but he wouldn’t have time to freeze.

He stops suddenly and Sebastian is so surprised that he almost falls on his ass. He is keeping his grip of Hunter anyway and manages to stay on his feet. “What are you doing Hunter?” His answer is silence. Hunter doesn’t protest when Sebastian cleans marks and takes care of them.

“It’s nothing.”

Of course Sebastian has heard about cutting. He hasn’t slept on school lessons and once he knew tragical-looking girl who stopped eating and then tried to commit a suicide in the bathroom of school back in France. Jennifer was anyway girl and it’s easier for Sebastian to understand that girl can be so sensitive. He doesn’t know how to handle same sensitivity in his invincible captain. Their brave Hunter.

Hunter goes to bed and Sebastian stands there wondering should him hide everything sharp. In the end he doesn’t do it. His roommate would find other ways to hurt himself.

Sebastian doesn’t allow him to handle everything alone. Hunter finds it extremely annoying but he can’t do anything, when Sebastian is everywhere with his bright face and bubbling voice. He isn’t usually so chatty person but talking about anything seems to be good way to distract Hunter from too deep thoughts.

Familiar screaming wakes him up in the night and Sebastian doesn’t understand how boys living near them haven’t heard anything. Or maybe they are just too polite to say it aloud. Nightmares aren’t suitable small talk subject.

This time he doesn’t bitch or leave Hunter alone. He is there, standing awkwardly by his roommate’s bed. Hunter is squirming, his lips forming desperate words. “No, please, no. Not anymore. Please.” Something has to be done.

“Hunter.” He tries bit louder voice but doesn’t get any result before third time. Then his eyes open and it looks like Hunter will jump out of bed. “Easy. I got you.” He really isn’t skillful in things like soothing people or using gentle voice but Sebastian tries for Hunter.

Hunter is panting like racehorse and sweat has soaked his forehead. “It’s okay. It’s just you and me here. Not anything bad.”

“It was hell”, he says suddenly. Sebastian isn’t waiting storytime. Hunter doesn’t owe him anything for help.“You don’t have to tell.”

“I want. If it isn’t too bad for you?” Maybe it is, but Sebastian doesn’t say a word.

“I don’t know how he noticed it. He got to know my secret and used it. That’s why I don’t use shower in the dressing room. He wasn’t even that big guy, maybe even bit smaller than me but he was a nightmare in that. He always suprised me and there was a knife.” Hunter pulls his shirt and Sebastian can see long scar on his lower back. “I wanted him to stop and he did that.”

“How did you get here?”

“By begging. I had a weekend at home and I was pleading my father that I wouldn’t have to go back. It was humiliating and he said no but my older brother knew that something wasn’t right. He talked to dad and probably saved my life.”

Since then Sebastian is keeping an eye on Hunter all the time. He is watching him at the meals – would you like to have another banana, I can bring you more juice, bit more vegetables? Sebastian really waits that Hunter loses his nerves but his roommate takes it surprisingly well. Like he would be even thankful.

He has relapses. When stress or anxiety is too much, Hunter doesn’t see any other way to cope than blade. Sometimes situation is saved when they go to track together. No matter how it goes, Sebastian doesn’t get mad. “You will be okay”, he promises time after time, when Hunter is looking for his help child’s gaze in his eyes.

Then comes that first really warm spring day which drives people outside. Most of the boys are gone for the weekend and when Sebastian checks weather report, he has plans. It’s good time for his idea, there wouldn’t be so much talking. He chooses their company, just Nick and Jeff and few younger guys. Younger boys would be simply too afraid of Hunter and Nick and Jeff are too gentle to say anything.

They would have a picnic outside. Some casual time together, not any kind of pressure for Hunter.

“It’s hot day”, he mentions quietly. Hunter’s gaze is almost loving and his hand nearly reaches towards blazer. There are also sweaters but Sebastian has to convince other boy. “How about this one?” It’s white shirt without sleeves. It wouldn’t cover anything, everybody would see Hunter’s skin.

“You need to start sunbathing gorgeous. You will look sexy when your skin is all golden.”

“I thought I was already pretty.”

Sebastian hugs him. It’s weird to hug Hunter, he is all smooth muscles and heavy body but Sebastian does it anyway because he can. He saw time when Hunter was afraid of physical contact but now other boy seems to be almost excited every time when somebody touches him.

“They won’t say anything.” Hunter sighs slowly and turns around. Water shines in his eyes. “Do you promise?” Both of them know what Sebastian really promises. He promises to take care of Hunter and take him away if situation is too much.

Sunlight covers Hunter and Sebastian forgets to breathe. It’s clear for every seeing person what Hunter has been through. He doesn’t try to hide. His arms are there for everybody to see and comment.

They had already known that Jeff is special, little angel but now he proves that once again. Hunter is ready to run when other boy approaches him but then Jeff’s careful fingers with light touch are there. He examines lines, Sebastan has tried his best with them but healing would take time and to be honest, Hunter’s skin is still kinda mess. Finger is moving carefully like butterfly.

“Does it hurt? Is this ok?” Jeff asks. Nick is about to stop him – it’s Hunter Clarington after all but Sebastian hushes him. “It is ok.”

 “You know, I have this one new ointment you could borrow. It could help a bit.”

And then Hunter and his blade bites are accepted. No mean questions or awkward silences. He is still Hunter, their stubborn and annoying captain who calls everybody untalented at least once a week. But he is also Hunter, their friend, one of them.


	12. Perfect combination

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone who knows me IRL, knows I absolutely love all kind of zombie-movies. I loved the idea of writing something like this but I knew I couldn't write anything really gross and bloody, that just isn't me. So, let me introduce my emotional fluff fic in zombie AU-universe. Mentions of blood, death, zombies and prostitution. 
> 
> Title borrowed from Frankie Ballard's Helluva Life.

Hunter Clarington never graduated from high school. But he is still alive and falls in love with Sebastian Smythe’s smile every day and that’s much more than it is possible to say about most people they shared past with before big A.

That doesn’t mean he would be used to this post-apocalyptic world. Population in USA came down,  half of the people still walking aren’t normal at all. He doesn’t dare use z-word, it would make all the Hollywood-clichés and movies too true but they are z-guys. Getting a bite is a death sentence and he has lost count how many times he and Sebastian have saved each other. He was pinned under one of those hell creatures, it looked totally hopeless and Sebastian didn’t have good position to aim but he was still able to stab z-guy. It wasn’t much but it was enough that Hunter suddenly found his left knee and threw monster away.

It’s just grey dust as far as he can see. They are on the top of the hill to scope. “Pack coming from west.” Hunter spots those wobbling figures too when Sebastian mentions it. Both of them are armed, stolen gun belts hanging on the hips. He has gotten over the fact how damned sexy he finds Sebastian like this, his body tight under green t-shirt and black jacket. Forehead dirty under dark hair and whole body glowing danger. Sebastian is all inner strength, valuable fastness and long limbs. During first weeks they fucked every night. It was fast and messy but both needed to feel that other one was alive. Sebastian’s heart was beating under his palm and Hunter tasted like Hunter, not blood and death. Voice was apologetic in his ear. “Sorry, sorry, sorry, it shouldn’t be like this”, Sebastian whispered over and over again.

Hunter used to shoot with his dad back in home so he actually knew what to do when they broke in gun store. Good stuff was still there, other people were still too shocked to think about that. They thought help would come but Hunter had seen falling planes and pure anarchy. Sebastian had been shaky, he was pulled from his organized rich boy life in the middle of catastrophe.

Both of them know that Sebastian would have lost his life in the first bloodbath without Hunter. It’s precious memory, last normal morning in their relationship. Everything in Dalton started with lonely scream. Voice wasn’t boyish or natural and sounded scared not amused so Hunter’s instincts were immediately awake. Sebastian didn’t care, they were having a breakfast in bed. He would have happily continued naked cuddling, _last night in Scandals, jealous eyes, their bodies moving together, kiss on the cheek, young and beautiful._

Hunter peeked and he is still thankful that Sebastian didn’t share that view. Things were escalating fast, there were bodies lying on expensive carpet and blood, so fucking much blood colouring dark walls. Bodies weren’t worst thing though. Worst were infected boys who were doing things Hunter doesn’t want to think about. He just called Sebastian who was mumbling in French. He still does that when he is nervous or distressed.

Hunter’s panicking boyfriend would have tried through corridors but he denied that. He has no idea how they got out without sprained ankles or other stuff like that, but it happened and it was blessing. Then they just ran. They ran like dogs chasing a rabbit until even Hunter was breathless, leaning against a tree. It wasn’t better outside, teachers and few boys left with cars but anybody didn’t help others, even survivors were like animals.

“Do you want to stay the night or keep going?” They could get to next town before most dangerous night time. God bless that idiot who would be out then without any kind of weapon. Hunter is tired, his feet are sore and backpack is heavy so he gives vote for staying. “I saw nice-looking houses maybe ten minutes back.” Sebastian nods and gives short peck on his cheek.

Breaking in unknown house is nothing these days. Hunter has remains of good son inside of him, so at first he would have wanted to leave something or at least clean the places. Sebastian laughed. “Do you wanna really leave something for people who are dead or in condition which is worse than death? Or are we saving our stuff to the point where other valuable thing is your pretty, tight ass?”

That has happened too. People learned fast and organized exchange system. They weren’t picky with paying, Sebastian isn’t girl but he is young and good-looking, no matter how sharp his body has became. Hunter was basically begging, almost on his knees. He didn’t want Sebastian to do it. “Don’t. We can find other way. Or let me go, don’t Sebastian.” Hunter hated to sound so needy and desperate but he was scared.

“It’s nothing babe. Just a quickie in the backroom, like old times in Scandals. I’ll be with you in 20 minutes. Stay stafe.” Sebastian had kept that promise every time and returned carrying something expensive, food, medicine, better clothes. Later they had learned that it was better if Hunter came too. Those men were really careful around broad teenager who had gun, knives and fists.

“Why you didn’t want me to go?” Hunter had asked after first time. He felt warm and sleepy stomach full of good food. It was good night and he hoped that little question wouldn’t make Sebastian annoyed. “You are my treasure and weakness Hunter. I know it sounds crazy in world like this but I was your first and only man and I want to keep that fact same.” After that he had cried a bit face pressed on Sebastian’s neck.

Looks like this house belonged to old grandmother. Sebastian goes straight to the kitchen to check if there is anything useful, like better knives than their old ones. Hunter takes couple of minutes to examine pics on the wall. He counts seven redhaired grandchildren, four dudes and three girls and wonders where they are now. Hunter doesn’t want to know. At least in the photos they are forever safe.

Old pain aches in his chest when he notices few pics of white fluffy cat. He didn’t find mr. Puss when he sneaked back to Dalton in first night after big A. Maybe it was better, meeting his cat would have been bittersweet because how the hell he would drag a pet with him now? Based on their information about infection, it doesn’t affect any animals so Hunter tries to keep positive when his old friend comes to his mind. It’s like in that old Stephen King-book which had become scary reality. It would take very long time before cats would be starving.

He notices shadows outside the house and is about to warn Sebastian but other boy is already kneeling. Both of them are holding their breathing. Z-guys wouldn’t come after them if they weren’t seen and Hunter curses himself. He should have closed blinds and curtains immediately, not waste time with useless emotion bullshit. This time goes easily and he darkens whole place as soon as last of the shadows is gone.

Normal human house has it’s good sides, of course. It’s dry and much warmer than outside but Hunter admits that sleeping inside makes him nervous. It would be so easy to get in hopeless situation, those horrbile creatures surrounding whole place.

They have some wordless arrangements. Sebastian has been leading Hunter after beginning with his arrogance but Hunter knows he is still bit stronger one. If they were trapped, Hunter would do it. He would use gun, not knife, too messy, too slow and too disrespectful. Life would leave Sebastian’s eyes and then he would commit a suicide. Sebastian wouldn’t be alone in life or death, never. He always makes sure that there are two bullets ready to use.

Bedroom is quiet and dark. Clean sheets make him delighted. Hunter would love to kick his shoes off but it just doesn’t feel safe enough even though Sebastian would be watching his sleep and walking around in a house. He has a weak smile on his face when Hunter remembers Diana Clarington. His mom would be furious if she saw how her son is behaving now. No manners, all neat habits gone.

“You were the boy I wanted to marry”, his voice is quiet and free hand without a knife starts petting Hunter’s hair. “Really?” Even after two years Hunter is still so hungry for Sebastian’s stories about Paris and better times but this is something else, something new. It’s mouth-watering to hear how he describes his favourite French foods and Hunter loves even little stories about his three first boyfriends, Casimir, Joachim and Olivier. He knows Sebastian would have wanted to take Hunter there, show all those places from his memories.

Sebastian makes a noise. “Yeah. When we started dating, I wrote to my journal that I had met my future husband. I even called my mom and told I’m gonna take you to altar one day and you will have our last name.”

He has still journal. Sebastian always carries few pencils and whatever notebook he has been able to find in his backpack. Hunter hasn’t asked what he writes and he doesn’t really understand it. Who the hell wants to remember these similar, dismal days and endless struggling? It’s anyway important to Sebastian and that’s why Hunter is tolerant.

He thinks about those more romantic and less complicated times. They are and they were simple couple so Sebastian wouldn’t have arranged big, fat proposal night. Or maybe he would have done it. Hunter can see it, shady restaurant, chocolate cake, single pink rose and simple question. It would have been yes of course.

Wedding few years later. Maybe simple one on the beach. Sebastian there in white shirt looking more handsome than ever. It’s fragile dream and Hunter has lump in his throat but when he looks at boy who had become man too soon, he knows this is everything he wants. “I would have loved that”, he tells quietly, voice sleepy because of hand in his hair. “But I have you and that’s everything.” Kiss is light and makes Hunter smile in his sleep.

(Few months later they start hearing rumours. Rumours about getting help from Europe. Soldiers, big guns, bombs, organized destroying. Z-guys would be gone. “I thought they were dead”, Sebastian says hope in his voice.

  
“They were cowards”, Hunter answers kissing his head.)


	13. Three words, eight letters and I'm yours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Are you dying captain?” Jeff finally raises his hand and asks. Hunter feels like an idiot. What kind of loser is he? Is it really this difficult to say those words to his boyfriend?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tittle from Gossip Girl like probably everyone knows.

He is stretched and sticky and kinda disgusting. Hunter should really go and get a fresh, cold, nice shower but it’s not easy to leave when half of Sebastian’s body is laying on him. He looks so comfortable and relaxed, feet and arms loose and face sleepy. In the end Hunter is forced to push other boy a little. “Need to get a shower.”

 “You don’t need. You are warm, Hunt, you aren’t going anywhere”, Sebastian protests and Hunter has to smile. Okay. Maybe he could take five more minutes for cuddling, it wouldn’t harm anybody.

He is about to say it. It’s all so beautiful, golden Sunday light on Sebastian’s lightly tanned skin and his fingers in that brown hair but in the end Hunter is coward.

Those three important words are in his mind all the time, but saying them isn’t as easy as he thought. He’d love to, though. Sebastian looks so young and lively when he laughs with boys or eats his favourite yoghurt sitting on Hunter’s desk. Hunter isn’t used to him, not yet. Every second with Sebastian is appreciated just like young heart can do. After living his whole life with family where people are hiding all their thoughts, it’s amazing to be around Sebastian who shows his emotions by kissing Hunter in front of whole school or defending him when guys from New Directions once again decide to tell their lovely and totally uninteresting opinions.

Maybe practising would help? He has talent yes, but big part of his perfection is result of patient repeating. First victim of his well-meaning actions is mr. Puss. Cat looks just bored when his owner blurts out those big words. “I love you.” Then he yawns right in front of Hunter’s face.

“Fine, you aren’t impressed, I get that.”

Maybe Sebastian wouldn’t be either. Their time together is totally enjoyable. Date usually every Friday if there isn’t quality time with family or any kind of practises. They have tried every little restaurant, grabbed pizza with them and sat in the car eating ice cream. Sebastian tasted like mint and it was so tempting that in the end their portions were just melted mess.

Sebastian doesn’t bring boys to their room anymore and he seems to be enjoying everything with Hunter. He blushes when he remembers evening two weeks back. It was short walk from movie theater to Sebastian’s car and other boy really took Hunter’s hand. Then they were there, walking hand in hand. He noticed few whispers and long looks, especially boys leaning on the wall didn’t look pleased but Sebastian was fearless and Hunter shared that feeling in valuable moment.

You could ask anybody in Dalton and everybody would say that they are hot couple, boys’ favourite topic to gossip about. They are seen everywhere together, kissing, smiling and being happy but Hunter doesn’t really know what Sebastian thinks. His mind is closed place and sometimes he just feels that some kind of final security would be nice.

His swimming team has a competition. Hunter is last swimmer in relay with big responsibility. If other guys didn’t fuck up, Hunter could take win home. It’s not perfect, his teammates aren’t doing anything easy for him but Hunter hasn’t spent ten years in the pool for nothing.

He has no time to check what is happening on other tracks, there is enough to think about in his screaming muscles and smooth movements. Everything is just water for him, even cheers are distant and quiet. Hunter slams his hand on cold tiles and whole place explodes. They had won, he had brought win home and is golden kid now.

Shouting guys are squeezing him. Everyone wants to hug winner boy and there are so many wet hands and feet. Hunter could swear that somebody even taps his ass. It’s joyful moment anyway and emotions have taken him, when Hunter announces. “I love you guys.” It’s not greeted with excitement but their captain, Todd pulls him to the corner.

“Clarington. We know you have a thing with Smythe and that’s cool and awesome. You are honestly better swimmer when Smythe is distracting you from thinking too much. It’s not our business. But don’t do that again, it’s weird and not manly at all. Boys can’t concentrate when they hear something like that.” His cheeks are red, when Hunter gives that promise to Todd.

How about in the practise with Warblers then? Hunter has a reputation as a strict leader, he knows that. He isn’t feared same way like in the beginning, Warblers are used to him and appreciate his skills, but Hunter isn’t willing to share praising words. It just isn’t his thing.

So their eyes are very big and Hunter can notice several open mouths when words have died from his lips. “You were awesome. I love you guys.” They had just finished last song. With more than one collision it hadn’t been their best performance. Boys just don’t remember new choreography yet.

“Are you dying captain?” Jeff finally raises his hand and asks. Hunter feels like an idiot. What kind of loser is he? Is it really this difficult to say those words to his boyfriend? Sebastian could take it or leave it. No matter what, Hunter would survive it.

So he pushes through formation until he is in fron of Sebastian. Other boy just sits on the sofa looking pleased with himself like usual. He hadn’t been worried about Hunter like others. Does he even care at all? Hunter knows he is ridiculously emotional mess, when he pulls Sebastian up and gives him almost too rough kiss.

“I love you!” he screams and turns around. He should get away, Hunter isn’t gonna cry here. Anywhere but not here. He has already made big enough fool of himself.

His steps are taking him towards the pool building. Blazer falls on the ground. It would be dirty and muddy later, weather is far from perfect but Hunter doesn’t care. Shoes are kicked off and then he jumps. It’s difficult, not so calming with his shirt and pants still on, so he takes few moments to struggle out of them. Then he can just swim. He is acting stupidly, he knows that but doesn’t know what else to do. Water has always been his friend.

Then there are restless steps and soft voice, of course. Sebastian is there to humiliate him more. Hunter turns to his back and just allows water to float his body.

“Come back, Hunt. Don’t be ridiculous.”

Hunter would be as ridiculous as he wants but that doesn’t stop Sebastian, of course. When he turns to watch, water splashes. Hunter knows Sebastian isn’t best swimmer and that’s why his want to protect is kicking in. This pool is deep one, not anything for beginners and Hunter can’t allow Sebastian to cross it alone.

They meet in the middle. Sebastian looks like a wet male model, when white shirt is glued to his skin and little water diamonds are decorating his face. “You said you love me.” Hunter doesn’t reply before he is holding Sebastian afloat. Other boy is panting lightly, water isn’t his element at all.

“Yeah, I did. It was stupid, sorry.” His apology is fast. Maybe he can still fix things. Sebastian’s hand is steady on his cheek, other boy trusts that Hunter wouldn’t let him sink. “I’m not lying baby, you could have been little less dramatic but it was adorable.”

Adorable. Hunter could deal with that. “It was so sweet, Hunt. Any other guy hasn’t said anything like that. I have heard I have body of sex god and praising of my sex skills but then you come and say you are in love with me.” Sebastian really adores him but Hunter notices that he doesn’t return those words from the bottom of Hunter’s heart.

“But?”

“Don’t ever think I wouldn’t be serious with you even though I’m not saying it right now.” His voice is serious. Sebastian shivers when he hugs Hunter and he realizes it would be time to get up from the pool. He helps Sebastian, makes sure other boy doesn’t slip and follows him then. Walking back is kinda experience and Hunter knows it would be pure luck if they didn’t get a flu. At the same time he is processing new information. Sebastian isn’t going to tell he loves Hunter. At least not now.

 “Can I ask you something?” He is nervous, maybe more nervous than ever with Sebastian.

“Anything, Hunt.” Finger scratches his palm familiar way and Hunter’s shoulders are bit less tense.

 “Will you say it some day?”

 “I will.” It’s soft promise and it’s not enough for Hunter and his stupid, teenager, aching heart but he is going to live with it.

 

  _It takes three long years. Hunter has been in a car accident. Not anything serious, few broken ribs and bloody nose but Sebastian is still pale when he rushes into hospital room. “Babe?” He is sitting by Hunter’s bed hours and when shy morning sun peeks from the window, Sebastian says it. “I love you.”_


	14. I need your love but I break your heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He has to swallow because Hunter suddenly knows who had put towel on his head and left painkillers."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soulmate AU.
> 
> Title from Blake Shelton's song It Ain't Easy Bein' Me.

Maybe Hunter wouldn’t have shaked Smythe’s hand if he had known the result. Dark-haired boy is smiling, white teeth, pleasant, low voice. “Of course I will help with everything. You just have to ask.” Then their hands actually find each other and touch. Hunter has few seconds to notice that Smythe’s grip is similar like everything else in him, very firm and confident but not too tight. He knows how to have fun.

Then it happens, pain, burning, tickling. It can’t be true, Hunter doesn’t believe it, no matter how many times he has listened his relatives telling about meeting their partner, first touch and that simple knowledge. Soulmate, lifetime partner, one and only. But those stories weren’t like this. It hurts like a bitch, Hunter’s eyes are watering and he tries to pull away. His feet are shaky and Smythe is very pale.

Maybe something is badly wrong, is this even dangerous, this can’t be like this and fuck like his whole hand would be burning…. Then pain knocks him out – one of the teachers grabs Sebastian before his head hits corner of the table.

Hunter has killer headache and tattoo when he is again awake. Somebody has put a cold towel on his forehead and room is sweetly dark. On the bedside table is glass of water and two painkillers so he swallows them and falls back to the bed. It has to be his dorm room because familiar bags are there, and other side of the room has clear personal touch. Photos and few posters on the wall and red sweater cowering desk chair.

Hunter wants to drown in the bed and he wonders would it be possible to suffocate himself with a pillow. It can’t be possible that Smythe, freaking Sebastian Smythe is his soulmate. But of course it’s possible, wave of confusion going through him proves that. Hunter is confused, hurt and annoyed yes, but that feeling isn’t his. It’s weaker, just echo in the background of his mind. Fucking awesome.

He wouldn’t be alone in his head anymore. Smythe would be always there, Hunter would get privilege to share all his feelings, he would wince from pain if Smythe was hurt and weird joy would surround him in the moments of other boy’s happiness. Damn.

One exact spot on his shoulder is still burning and he has to wince when fingers touch skin. Look in the mirror tells the truth. Letters are deep red, mark is so strong that it looks almost burned. S and other S, Sebastian’s initials for the world to see.

Door to room is opened and of course it’s last person Hunter would like to see right now. Smythe is holding hand on his forehead and looks concerned and miserable. “Don’t even start. I’m not arguing with your heterosexual bullshit right now.” He has to swallow because Hunter suddenly knows who had put towel on his head and left painkillers. Smythe had taken care of him.

“I’m not… I’m not into guys.” It’s really wrong thing say at that exact moment. Sebastian throws a glance which is hurt and annoyed at the same time. “Like I said, no talking about this right now. I need to sleep. Principal wants to see you in the morning after breakfast.”

Principal looks very worried when Hunter steps into room. His head is better now, no pain or fog and also his tattoo isn’t hurting anymore. In the morning, when Smythe was brushing his teeth with open bathroom door, Hunter had seen his tattoo, two red letters on his wrist. His roommate and supposed soulmate hadn’t noticed Hunter watching so he had stroked letters with ghost of smile on his face.

“I suppose you know that most people don’t find their soulmate before maybe early twenties?” principal asks and Hunter nods. He is dull. Hunter doesn’t know anymore what to do. He just can’t like boys. He isn’t going to like boys, not even this one exact boy. “That’s why you and Sebastian had such a strong reaction. Everything is bit different when you are so young, emotions are usually overwhelming before you get used to each other and make your relationship steady.”

“But I can’t date a guy.” Now he looks fatherly and that knowing gaze makes Hunter very small. “I think it’s not really something you’d like to talk about with me, but you know basics Hunter. You have known them for your whole life. Sebastian is young man and openly gay yes. Maybe you have some confidence and self-respect to learn from him.”

“But to talk about soulmate politics in Dalton. As I said, established couples aren’t usual here but when marks, tattoos and first reaction are clear, we usually put soulmates in same room because keeping them apart makes everything bit too difficult.” Great, Hunter had possibly planned to ask other room but that would be useless now. He doesn’t want to argue with big guy on his second day, so Hunter just smiles weakly when principal wishes good success with getting to know Sebastian.

Whole day is just fog. He has to prepare when he meets his new show choir group and that doesn’t go as poorly as Hunter thought. Sebastian is cold and polite, tells names and skills to Hunter without problems but he can sense that other boy isn’t himself. It’s absolutely sure that other boys would like to ask about tattoo Sebastian hasn’t covered but they know better than that.

They are left alone in the room. Hunter doesn’t know is he really waiting a change to talk with Sebastian privately. Other boy seems to be in deep thoughts. “So you still think you like girls?” If voice could kill, Hunter was already dead. “Yeah. I haven’t ever been into guys. I was dating but when I moved away, Jenny decided it was our ending.”

“I was so freaking happy for few minutes”, Sebastian tells using bitter voice. Hunter had waited questions about Jenny. He thought Sebastian could be curious but of course not. He has his own pain to carry. “You looked friendly and kind and were even good-looking. I thought there would be something nice for me finally. Then… When our minds connected, I got that disgust from you. I don’t know. Maybe you are very deep in closet or you have other issues but I’m not taking that shit from you. I don’t care if you like it or not, I’m gonna stay around.”

It’s weird feeling. Like Hunter’s mind would be divided in three parts. There is pure pain from Sebastian, his own reassurance that this is better, he couldn’t do it and everything is going to be okay and then that third part. He is too scared to think about that. “I’m sorry. So sorry. Maybe we can be at least friends? Our beginning was complicated.”

"I don’t honestly know. Like I said, you won’t get rid of me but that’s all I know right now."

It’s shit. Weekend comes and Sebastian goes. “I’ll be back before curfew.” Hunter is reading old Agatha Christie-book. He has no idea what Sebastian is going to do and doesn’t really care. Homework is done, rest of the evening would be his own quality time without any distractions like roommate/soulmate-dude.

Until he starts to get specially strong vibes from Sebastian. At first Hunter doesn’t believe it’s true. World can’t do this to him. Sebastian is with other guy and even though he misses Hunter with his every cell, pleasure can’t be ignored. It’s intimate, embarrassing and too much. Hunter learns to know how Sebastian reacts in bed, he gets faint glimpses of his favourite spots to touch and is too horny and too sad to care anymore when he finds himself hand in his pants.

When Sebastian comes back to silent room, shower fresh and sleeping Hunter is buried under his blankets. His tears have dried but Sebastian knows what had happened. He had felt it too when nameless and faceless footballer had fucked him.

He just doesn’t know how to use that information.

Sebastian hasn’t mentioned anything about Hunter to his family. So it’s not just pleasant when he receives a phone call from his mom. “I’m going to visit you with Stacey next weekend.” His heart stops. Then restless hits. One, two, three. “I have to tell something mom.”

“What, sweetie?” her voice is worried and Sebastian sighs. “Not anything bad. I haven’t seduced principal’s son or killed anybody with my car. I got my tattoo.”

“Oh, that’s nice. Is it blue one?”

Sebastian had tattoo once earlier, with his French boyfriend Olivier. Blue letters on his stomach and Olivier’s ankle meant that they weren’t meant to last. They were thing six months, it felt weird, Olivier, his brown eyes and low voice made Sebastian happy but all the time he was looking for something else. Then things happened, Jacob came, Sebastian saw how Olivier looked at him. He was there, when red letters appeared on his neck.

“No”, he almost swallows the word, it’s refreshing and scary to tell this exact secret. “It’s red one. Right on my wrist.”

“That’s wonderful, Sebastian. Can we meet him?”

His mom’s voice is so hopeful that Sebastian is suddenly breaking “He was so damn mean. He thinks he likes girls.” Sebastian doesn’t want to sound like spoiled kid who hadn’t gotten new, shiny toy. Especially he doesn’t want to cry. Sebastian is strong, he could get any guy to kneel in front of him, he doesn’t need that sulky kid to anything but then it happens. Tears are plump and wet on his cheeks.

“Don’t cry dear. It’s going to be okay, he will understand everything.”

They are gorgeous trio, Sebastian’s mom in her beige jacket and his beautiful sister. Hunter’s heart and body are heavy, when he is sitting on fence and watching them secrectly. His family loves Sebastian, they don’t care about his homosexuality at all. Hunter can see them smiling and laughing and somehow he is missing even though these people are totally unknown for him.

He would be welcomed. Hunter would be hugged and teased with no hesitation. They would be excited to meet their new family member, Sebastian’s future husband. Hunter knows that Sebastian’s time in Dalton hasn’t always been easy so probably they would feel also relief. He could keep Sebastian on right track.

Later he passes them in the cafeteria. Smythe women are alone, and then somebody touches his sleeve. “You are Hunter, right?” He has to stop and turn around. They have half eaten bagels in front of them and Sebastian’s sister is just sipping her ice tea.

"Sebastian said I should leave you alone but I was too curious." Hunter smiles and shrugs. He wants to be polite to Sebastian’s mom, no matter how difficult situation is.

"He is good kid. So good and really likes you."

"I know that." She would like to ask more questions but Hunter is in too emotional condition for that.

Whole thing is struggling. Being around Sebastian is kinda calming, his biology isn’t satisfied but it’s okay. But it’s not enough and it’s so stupid how restless he becomes if Sebastian isn’t around. Even during their separated classes he is pretty worried. Is Sebastian okay? How is he doing? There is no way something would have happened to him, right?

Hunter has been awake in health education, so of course he knows what should be done. Established relationship with Smythe and all problems would be gone. Connection would be still there, they are stuck with it but they wouldn’t be so damn nervous all the time. Establishing wouldn’t even ask actual fucking, at least not in the beginning. They should just admit their feelings, share maybe kisses and bit more physical closeness. It would be sunshineland with Sebastian.

Christmas holiday is bad. Hunter makes sure that he doesn’t use tank top in front of his parents. Luckily it’s not very warm in their old house so wearing oversized sweaters doesn’t cause awkward questions. Dad tells about daughter of his co-worker and Hunter keeps his ears shut.

When Hunter gets back to Dalton, his roommate is in bed looking sick and miserable. Hunter sees little details, his chapped lips, bloody shade of his eyes and sweat on Sebastian’s forehead. “Clarington. Fucking finally”, Sebastian barks and at least he sounds like himself.

They are quiet for a moment. Hunter knows what Sebastian is going to ask and he is so tempted, he wants to do it. “Can you please kiss me? I didn’t actually enjoy my holiday even though I was in freaking Paris.” Sebastian sits up when Hunter obeys. Pure hope in his deep, green eyes is heart-breaking, when Hunter brings their lips together. Sebastian glows fever and Hunter hasn’t felt very good without him either.

Suddenly world is upside down when Sebastian uses Hunter’s own weight against him. Other boy is holding him, it’s first time for Hunter under boy but he isn’t worried or scared. Sebastian would let him go if Hunter asked. It’s totally other topic if he wants to.

It’s not just one kiss, of course not. They are horny teenagers and Hunter is tired of his right hand’s company. Kissing Sebastian is something unbelievable. Hunter’s mind is fucking purring for pleasure and other boy’s taste is like mix of all Hunter’s favourites. Sebastian is cold and warm, he is like ice water on hot day after a run or comfortable hug on windy winter morning.

Hunter is light-headed and happy, he has his soulmate in his arms for the first time but sound of zipper makes him realize what is happening. Sebastian’s lips are swollen and eyes shining. His boxers are yellow, that’s somehow boyish and makes Hunter feel even more uneasy. Sebastian doesn’t want anything bad, he isn’t any kind of threat. Sebastian Smythe just wants to love him with all his heart.

“I can’t do this.” Sebastian turns his head away immediately and covers his exposed torso. “Of course you can’t. Why I even asked? It would be easier if I just left now and went to die somewhere without you.”

“We can make some arrangements. I’m not stupid, I’m not leaving you. Just being with you is impossible.”

“Why is it impossible? Talk to me. I get glimpses of you but I don’t really know anything about you.”

So Hunter tells. He focuses on words ignoring his hardness, he could have received help with that from Sebastian but that’s wasted opportunity now. Sebastian’s arm drops on his hard stomach and Hunter allows gesture. It’s comforting and his mind feels whole, when Sebastian is there, near him.

His soulmate is patient, when Hunter mentions family traditions, old family and things that are waited from him. “You are rich and from elitist family, probably going to one of finest colleges. My parents would love you if you just were a girl.” Sebastian sighs nuzzling his neck.

“Are you really so sure? Your parents know it’s just biology. You didn’t choose me. Fate did it.”

“My parents don’t have tattoos. Or they have but with different letters.” That surprises Sebastian, Hunter hears how he gasps.

“Me and my brother have always known uncle Richie and aunt Marie. They have been even at our Christmas table but it’s still most clinical thing I have ever seen. That’s why I know that they wouldn’t like this gay thing at all. I’m sorry. You have to believe that.”

Hunter has a tendency to stress so he usually gets quite a flu few times in a year. It’s rainy Friday morning and when Sebastian is about to go to breakfast after showering and brushing his teeth, Hunter hasn’t even left his bed. He is shivering under three thick blankets, he should probably get thermometer and more clothes to wear – boxers and t-shirt isn’t suitable outfit for a patient but moving feels too big task. Other boy is hesitating, everything has been bit too complicated but in the end Hunter’s discomfort is something what Sebastian simply can’t resist.

“I have painkillers in my bag and I should really have some tea somewhere. Drink something and go back to sleep. I will check you on lunch time and take you to the nurse if it’s needed.” Sebastian kisses his lips quickly without complaining about his germs.

He can sense Sebastian’s presence for whole morning even in his sleep. Other boy is worried, wants to come back to Hunter. He can imagine it, Sebastian checking time secrectly every five minutes and squirming on his chair. Maybe other boys exchanging wondering looks.

“Go get a shower, you’ll feel better after that. I haven’t ever seen your hair looking so horrible”, Sebastian teases later in the evening with all love. Hunter would smack him with a pillow if he wasn’t still so tired.

Shower is anyway good idea. Warm water washes away sweat from whole day and even though headace is coming back, Hunter feels ten times fresher when he comes back towel around his waist. It’s low, showing bit more skin than usually, and through his sickness Hunter can see that Sebastian’s eyes are examining his body. Low wave of desire goes through him, and that’s embarrassing because Sebastian doesn’t even need to see physical reaction to know what is going on.

“You are intelligent guy so I’ll say this just once. There will be a day when you beg it from me. You can’t resist it, it was written in you before you were born.”

“Will you give it to me then?”

“I would give anything for you fucking asshole.” Words are rude but Sebastian’s voice is worth it. It’s so gentle, like dark velvet. Both of them are falling into seduction but then Hunter’s soulmate remembers his role as a nurse.

“But not right now. You are going to rest, you still have fever and I don’t wanna have more Warbler quality time without you.” Hunter recognizes straight command when he hears one so disobeying isn’t real option. He is wrapped safely in his bed, when Sebastian starts reading. It’s Hunter’s copy of And then there were none, old and worn paperback.

”This is your favourite, right?” Sebastian asks after some time. “I can take other book if you don’t wanna hear this one. I just thought because you are reading this so regularly.”

“It’s perfectly fine”, he whispers and Sebastian pets his hair gently. “We will be okay”, he promises on that moment of kindness.

Few weeks later Hunter loses his virginity with Sebastian. Hunter doesn’t tell that it’s his first time, Sebastian probably senses it anyway. It’s sweet and slow, hands studying his body respect Hunter and lips are loving when them leave hickey on his neck. He is asking more and waiting teasing smile or words, when Sebastian sees how he becomes mess because of other boy’s touch but that doesn’t happen. He is gentleman until the end.

First time for months Hunter’s mind is quiet. Sebastian is still there, but there is just peace between two of them. No negative emotions. It’s just illusion that everything would be clear and Hunter has a lump in this throat, but it works anyway. They don’t talk about decreasing days or separation in the future. School nurse calls them for meeting and tries to convince them that planning the future is important. “You know that being alone is impossible. You have to make decisions”, she says over and over again. After first time Hunter simply stops listening. It’s not wise but he is tired to be wise.

He prefers time with Sebastian. They learn to know each other and Hunter understands Sebastian is everything he could ever want. His free spirit completes Hunter’s longing for perfection. The share similar humour, and know how to comfort each other. Hunter hugs Sebastian and Sebastian leaves silly cat photos from magazines on his desk. Sebastian is serious when he asks, what kind of cat Hunter would like to have in the future and Hunter tells that precious wish.

In the middle of the night he is dreaming of their wedding day. Tattoos and love and friendship and emotions tying them together for forever. It doesn’t feel forced anymore, but of course he can’t have it.

Hunter doesn’t see it coming. It’s their graduation day. He knows where Sebastian is going and it’s not really so far away, they could make it work with phone calls, Skype dates and weekend visits. It wouldn’t be perfect, Hunter knows that. Sometimes need would be so hard to that one of them would skip classes in the middle of weekend just to be with other one.

He is leaving with his parents, holding his flowers and talking about his summer job until somebody knocks his shoulder. “Mr. and Mrs. Clarington. It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Sebastian Smythe.” Sebastian is smooth and handsome, perfect boy. Hunter’s father throws asking look waiting for an explanation but this is one of those rare times of his life, when Hunter is totally wordless. He is scared too.

“We have seen each other few times but haven’t ever been properly introduced. Like my tattoo can tell, I’m soulmate of your son.”

Hunter is waiting for his world to end but Michael Clarington is perfectly polite, when he shakes Sebastian’s offered hand. “Great to meet you, kid.” Then smile of his soulmate is only thing Hunter can focus on.


	15. So let's skip the "how you been" (1/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Sebastian. You aren’t in France.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit explaining like usually. Letter thing has been in my mind since I saw it [here](http://huntbastianhumpday.tumblr.com/post/92395452988/thanks-to-everyone-who-collaborated-with-this) . I wasn't planning to write it, but then I saw Swedish version of [this](http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1252452.The_Horse_of_Her_Dream) book at library and things started to happen. I absolutely loved that series, when I was kid and I still have few of those books in my collection. Somehow atmosphere in those books inspired to write this one. 
> 
> This is in the two parts because putting all in one chapter looked bit too heavy in my eyes, and I wanna also say that I have used some so called artistic freedom in some points :) 
> 
> Title from Train's song Drive By.

Sebastian is ten years old and he is restless kid, that brave leader, who is always first in every place. Three years earlier he almost got killed on railroad track. Little dark-haired boy was so fascinated by tiny kitten in the grass, that he didn’t simply notice approaching train before it was almost too late. Caroline and Stacey Smythe remember that day forever. They ran, Stacey was crying so hard that she didn’t even see anything, and Caroline screamed her son’s name. Next day speaking was impossible. When train finally passed them, unhurt Sebastian was standing there with confused face. He had simply stepped aside but it still feels miracle.

Year later they were on a holiday. Tourist ponies and horses were supposed to be calm and basically almost sleeping all the time. Smythe family had had kinda boisterous year and Caroline thought that calm and sleepy sounded perfect for Sebastian. And it was perfect. Until Sebastian’s white pony got bee sting. Then it left like a rocket and little boy flew. Broken leg ruined rest of his beach holiday, and Caroline swore that horses wouldn’t be allowed near her son.

Before and after his tenth birthday it takes just three months from Sebastian to break three of his precious bones and Caroline decides that Sebastian needs some different hobbies. She doesn’t really want to limit his curious and brave nature. Boy is so eager for life and wants to try everything. Soon enough adulthood would make him steadier and calmer and yes, bit boring.

Caroline’s son is bored to death at home so she tries to find something nice from store. Something peaceful, slow and nice. Sebastian doesn’t need more athletic or fast hobbies. Magazine for boys from eight to twelve sounds exactly perfect. It’s even possible to find pen pal from their webpage. They aren’t as close as they used to be but she still writes to Annie more or less regularly. Maybe Sebastian would like to have foreigner friend too.

Sebastian is sleeping when she gets back home so brilliant idea has to wait. “Why I’d like to write to some random dude in different country?” Sebastian asks his tongue sharp. Caroline feels secretly kinda proud. Sebastian has his dad’s looks and that would make him handsome man in the future but his temperament isn’t from Michael.

She doesn’t argue about pen pal, that isn’t right way to deal with Sebastian and when they are having evening snack, he drops print on the table. “Can you help me to write that letter? I’d like to get to know this kid.” “Kid” is year younger than Sebastian. He lives in USA and likes horses. His name is Hunter and Hunter sounds like a boy Caroline would choose to be her son’s best friend if it was possible.

"Why him?" she asks and Sebastian shrugs. "I’m not sure. He doesn’t seem to be crybaby."

Sebastian knows his mom thinks that enthusiasm to writing would last exactly until that day, when he is again properly on his feet and is free to move his body but no. Sebastian takes his time for writing telling about his school, sister and hobbies. He puts sticker of his favourite football club on one of the letters and rolls his eyes, when Hunter tells that he prefers ice hockey. Hunter’s handwriting is round and clear. Sebastian gets impression that his life on a horse farm isn’t exactly exciting. When Sebastian is breathing city in the middle of Paris, Hunter is going to his tiny country school and trying higher and higher fences with his eager jumper pony.

They exchange pictures. Sebastian sends one, where he is grinning arm around his sister’s shoulders and Hunter says Stacey is cute girl. He feels weird but when Hunter replies with photo of him and his white pony Marshmallow, Sebastian smiles again. Hunter is very tanned and skinny boy whose blue eyes are peeking through bit too long sandy brown hair.

Get a haircut, he writes. Stylish haircut.

Four years later he kisses boy for the first time, and is already looking for his best pencil when he opens door to his room. Then Sebastian actually stops and thinks carefully. It had felt good. Kiss has lasted just few seconds but Sebastian had registered Todd’s chapped lips and his big hand resting on Sebastian’s waist. He really thinks he might like boys, their low voices, strong bodies and easy attitudes. But it’s not sure what Hunter says about it. How they treat gays in countryside?

Then he just grabs pen and sits down. Sebastian hasn’t ever thought too much what he is writing to Hunter. That’s why their distant friendship is so natural. So he simply tells about Todd and kiss but leaves out all too detailed thoughts, like those heating memories of shirtless Todd on the beach. He puts pages in the envelope and hopes for the best. Hunter is his safety, he is so distant that telling even most sensitive things isn’t difficult.

Waiting reply isn’t easy. Sebastian is walking around in the house and anything can’t make him to focus on stuff like homework or talking with his sister or parents. Then letter comes. Hunter doesn’t care at all. “Do you like guys then? Or guys and chicks both?” he just asks.

Their parents get a divorce. Sebastian’s world is crashing when he is packing his whole room. They wold move to USA. Mom wouldn’t come with them, of course not, but for some reason they had decided that for twins it would be better to live in this new, unknown place. They are perfectly bilingual so that isn’t problem.

In that chaos he doesn’t remember to send his new address to Hunter and when they are there, wandering around in that big, dark house, Sebastian notices suddenly that he has spent a month without writing a line. Hunter must be disappointed or maybe he has already forgotten Sebastian.

“I forgot him”, Sebastian tells Stacey who raises one perfect eyebrow. She is playing with her golden necklaces. “Your letter buddy? Why you don’t visit him? We have still time before school starts. Father doesn’t care about little road trip.”

It’s not exactly little road trip or road trip at all. Sebastian doesn’t have a car yet and bus trip would take at least twenty hours. He could spend night in a hotel after first part of the journey or just continue with break of three hours. “Are you sure about that?” he asks Stacey who is standing behind him and watching laptop screen over Sebastian’s shoulder. “I just show up there?”

“Yeah. Be spontaneous. Why not Sebastian? You have your credit card and big guy like you isn’t first person anybody would like to mess with. Summer adventure before school. You haven’t been yourself after France. Hunter is right thing to cheer you up.”

“Come with me?” Sebastian asks half-seriously and smiling Stacey shakes her head. “No brother. It’s your and his thing. I would just make everything awkward and you couldn’t have dude talks with me there.”

Sebastian hasn’t ever been good at planning things, so two days later he just goes. Bus driver looks surprised, when he hears where Sebastian has bought ticket. “Are you runaway, kid?” he asks making Sebastian snort. “Not your business creep.” With that comment he could possibly find his pretty face from tv-news and god knows where, but Sebastian has strong suspicions that old guy wouldn’t be that eager to make world better place.

Spending hours on little seat isn’t pleasant. It’s not ideal for his long legs but somehow Sebastian manages to find a position where he can take restless naps. But then some sly-looking little man tries to steal his bag and Sebastian stops that. No matter how tired he would be, he can’t let that happen.

Three books for the journey wasn’t enough at all, and when he has break before starting second part of his stupid and idealistic trip, Sebastian hurries to bookstore. He finds old Stephen King paperbacks with good discount and buys five of them. Then few sandwiches and lots of cheap coffee and he is ready to continue.

When he is finally there, Sebastian understands that ride to the actual farm would be needed. He walks around at he bus station and it doesn’t take long before some middle-aged woman asks if he needs help. Sebastian tells his destionation and asks ride _if it’s not too much_ and of course it’s not.

When woman stops the car at the gates of Clarington farm. Sebastian thanks for the ride charmingly ( _That was nothing little dear, always nice to help young people_ ) and follows the road towards actual buildings. He can spot stables and home of Hunter. Farm is huge, as far as Sebastian can see, there is so much green and horses in all possible horse colours. Hunter had told it yeah, but everything looks different. It’s difficult to understand that all of it is true. Sebastian’s friend is really living her

Horses are pretty curious, watching him with wide brown eyes or following him on the other side of fence. Most animals are full-grown but Sebastian is really tempted when he sees smaller one, baby horse with too long legs and bit fluffy fur. He slaps himself mentally and walks faster. Sebastian Smythe doesn’t like cute things. He hates kittens, babies and especially baby horses.

Sebastian is used to be confident in all possible situations, but horse farm is very far from his comfort zone. It’s bit muddy so luckily he is wearing ancient pair of Converse shoes. Them could be thrown away at home. People are going back and forth and nobody pays attention to one new face. Finally Sebastian stops one of the men. “Excuse me, sir. Could you tell me where I can find Hunter?”

“Hunter is in the woods with one of the boys. Are you his friend from school?” Sebastian mumbles something and accepts suggestion to sit on the bench and wait. He spots two big figures when they are still far away. Horses are walking slowly and Sebastian doesn’t know which one of the boys is Hunter.

When they are getting closer, Sebastian gets up and dries his hands secrectly to his jeans. It’s not appropriate to get sweaty in situation like this. Hunter comes commanding his horse which tries to invade Sebastian’s personal space. “No Penny, you aren’t that good friend with him.”

The he looks at the stranger. Hunter freezes and dismounds. He offers horse to redhead boy who has already one. “Lucas. Can you take Penny this time? I owe you a favor for this.”

“Sebastian. You aren’t in France.”


	16. Night owls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw [this](http://askboxmemes.tumblr.com/post/31258531216/1-give-me-a-pairing-2-give-me-an-au-setting) inspiring post on Tumblr and believe me, I had big difficulties to find it from my likes. I don’t like talking so much, so I put all my words into writing and even my FB-messages are always very long. I saw those limits as a challenge and I decided to try if I could do it. So here it is, ten tiny fics with more or less Huntbastian.

They meet at the graveyard. Hunter’s left leg is a prosthesis, he has short hair and dead dreams in the blueness of his eyes. Sebastian’s offered hand is open, new possibility.

 *

Hunter has always been afraid of dogs, and he doesn’t find right moment to tell it Sebastian before they are at the animal shelter. A puppy climbs onto his lap and Hunter panics, when it tries to lick his hand. Sebastian doesn’t laugh or leave him.

 *

Dawn of the dead makes Sebastian shiver every time. Hunter’s eyes are shining and he is excited, even laughing at especially delicious scenes. It’s comfortable to lean on his broad shoulder.

 *

Hunter is about to lose everything. Sebastian isn’t ready to give up before one thing has happened. He dies on the beach, Hunter’s body warming his coldness and lips kissing his bald head.

 *

Sebastian has seen bruises and scratches on his skin, and it’s something what Hunter can’t take back. He tries to fight, but Sebastian finds the truth. Emily’s violent behaviour is his biggest and most shameful secret but his best friend promises escape.

 *

Sebastian hates sunny days, screaming kids and especially ice cream. He almost says no, when unknown voice asks if he could buy Sebastian something but those bright, innocent eyes make him soft. “Mint is my favourite.”

 *

Stupid horse would deserve bullet into his head. Something is wrong with his left ankle and that means Hunter would lie in the woods until somebody would find him. Few minutes later he hears arrogant voice and of course it has to be that fucking Smythe.

 *

Hunter almost hates that sexy guy, who is working in his favourite bookstore. He has already bought more books than his monthly budget would allow. This is last time, he swears on Monday morning, but it isn’t, when then he finds a note and a phone number between his newest purchase.

 *

Sebastian is always praising Hunter’s body, he likes it how strong Hunter is, how he can use his strenght in bed and give pleasure to both of them. He is flattered but then Hunter starts to think that maybe it is some kind of hidden allusion that his boyfriend could be smaller. He stops eating and starts running more and Sebastian finds him before it’s too bad.

 *

They meet online. Sebastian doesn’t tell anybody that he has internet friend – it just sounds too weird and nerd – but Hunter becomes _important._ Then he saves money for a Paris-trip and Sebastian just knows that anybody isn’t like Hunter.


	17. Drop dead gorgeous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Good to see you smile captain.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this has been in my mind for months now. I once woke up crying because I had a dream, where I was blind and now I did a fic of it. I read few articles about blind people (ended up reading about future plans of 14 years old horsegirl), but I don't really know a thing about blindness or haven't ever properly met blind people, so you could say I have used lots of so called artistic freedom.

Hunter’s mind is as blank as his eyes. Dalton, first place that had felt like a home after very long time, is now new, almost life-threatening territory, full of possible dangerous traps. He would have already met his fate on the stairs, if there hadn’t been Jeff’s steady hand.

“Hunter?” Sebastian has finally arrived. He had been stuck in Paris, when Hunter had spent most of his Christmas break laying in the hospital bed. They had gone through numerous discussions on the phone without mentioning Hunter’s current and permanent condition.

He feels small and vulnerable and hates that. There he is, gorgeous and sexy Sebastian just few feet away. Hunter can imagine how snowflakes are decorating his hair and cool winter air has reddened Sebastian’s cheeks. It’s scary to think that soon he won’t probably remember those things, exact shade of his green eyes or Sebastian’s trademark smirk. World would be just black emptiness for him.

Sob is an alert to Sebastian. He is there in a heartbeat, holds Hunter against his chest. His fingers are bit lost, but soon enough he has familiar body under his touch. Sebastian’s breath is hot on his skin, and maybe huge knot in his stomach is opening a bit.

But Hunter can’t do it. He can’t keep Sebastian, who is so energetic and deserves more than insufficient boyfriend. Sebastian doesn’t have to be Hunter’s babysitter. He could have chosen any guy, and he took Hunter because Hunter was similar, independent, not needy crybaby.

Hand is caressing his faces gently. Hunter doesn’t know how he looks like, touching near his useless eyes is weird, it’s difficult to believe that unnaturally tight skin belongs to a human being. “Is it bad?” he asks licking his lips. Even in the beginning he wasn’t ever this nervous and tense with other boy. They were wondering would it be worth it, but Sebastian and Hunter recognized similar souls.

“You are fucking gorgeous, sexy”, Sebastian replies and then they are kissing like tomorrow wouldn’t come.

“You can’t do it”, he whispers later in the night. Almost naked Sebastian is warm beside him, and it really bothers Hunter that in normal situation both of them would be happily sleeping after exhausting but oh so good sex. Today Sebastian had settled down after few passionate moments, and in the end making out had been almost virginal. Hunter isn’t broken, he can still take whatever Sebastian gives but maybe it had also been comforting. Maybe.

“Do what?” other boy asks hand resting on his bare stomach.

 “This, me, us. I don’t know. I don’t deserve you anymore. I’m gonna be pain in the ass in the near future. You don’t have to drag me with you.”

“You were first boy, who made me nervous. I didn’t even know what it was, one smile was enough to make me crazy. I fought for us Hunter, I did everything to prove your cute, little heterosexual theory wrong. I’m not giving up anymore.”

Hunter goes to next practise with Warblers and shocks everyone when he mentions stepping down. Guys don’t let that happen. Sebastian leads him through the group and when weak sunshine warms his neck, he knows they are in front of the window.

“Okay”, his boyfriend mutters to himself. “You can’t dance or do choreographies. Leading practise is partly impossible. But you haven’t lost your voice or your attitude, Hunt. I will take care of practical things, but you are still our real captain. We need you and your little speeches.”

He is all the time wearing black glasses everywhere. It just feels safe, Hunter can’t exactly see how people are looking at him, but he still feels curious eyes on his skin. Then Sebastian makes that weird suggestion.

“You could forget these with Warblers. They are your best friends.” Hunter trusts Sebastian more than anything, so glasses are taken off, when he gets to the room full of his friends. In the school he doesn’t even use white cane, there are always helping hands and voices. Maybe walking alone with the cane would be more independent act but big group of people gives him illusion of normalcy.

“I’m not talking to Thomas”, he confesses, when they are cuddling in the bed. Hunter had been with his brother, when that bad thing had happened. He knows so well that it’s petty and simply mean – Thomas isn’t quilty, he was just there, but he ended Christmas break unhurt, when Hunter is still learning his new and different life.

Hunter isn’t totally happy with his parents either. He may be blind but nothing is wrong with his brain, he doesn’t need to be treated like ten years old. He simply stopped answering phone calls, and in the end it was Sebastian who explained situation to Diane Clarington. He wasn’t super popular in their household before everything, but nowadays he is tolerated like favourite toy of difficult kid. All of them are trying to keep Hunter satisfied.

 “I think he should understand that. It’s not fair, not at all, but it’s humane way to deal with everything. You are only important thing right now. He and his feelings can wait.”

There is life before accident and after accident, and of course Sebastian wants to take him out also after that day. He mentions it on Thursday morning and Hunter is immediately willing to do compromises. “We can go to movies.” He could listen to speaking and it wouldn’t most boring thing ever.

Sebastian has other thoughts. “There is a concert at the community centre. Some student group. They can be completely shit, but then we can laugh secrectly.”

It’s first official date after accident and Hunter wants to look good. Sebastian has taught him more positive thinking but it’s still horrible, when he can’t be sure, mirrors are useless and only way to get any kind of information are his own hands. Sebastian hasn’t touched him properly yet, just light making out and sweet kisses and Hunter is afraid to ask if other boy still wants him.

At least his body feels good. Skin is smooth, right places are hard and firm. He isn’t getting soft, mornings in the swimming pool have been good to him. Hunter had been desperate to find new athletic activity, and of course it was Sebastian who suggested swimming. Before accident he disliked mornings but now he is there every time, reading a book or doing homework and making sure Hunter is okay in the water.

 Hunter has memorized shirts in the closet, so he is almost absolutely sure that he is holding tight white one, which would give attention to his body and skin colour. But he isn’t willing to screw up, so of course fact has to be checked in his friend’s room. Jeff accepts his clothes and does something with his hair. “Good to see you smile captain.” Hunter’s smile is even wider, when light, friendly peck is pressed on his cheek.

“Have fun. You deserve it and him.”

“What kind of poor thing you have found, Smythe?” First voice that they hear at the community centre is far from friendly. It’s sharp and manly, guy is probably few years older than they. Sebastian pushes Hunter behind himself. “Go to hell, Todd. If I hear one more word about Hunter, I’m going to castrate you.”

Hunter hates to be helpless in that kind of situation. He couldn’t help if guy decided to attack Sebastian, but luckily sparring stays verbal. Sebastian throws few insults and takes Hunter’s hand. “Let’s go, that asshole doesn’t ruin our evening”, he says kissing Hunter’s temple.

 Hunter has heard better performers than that student group, they have potential, but they don’t seem to know how to use it. Vocalist has strong, bit raspy voice and Hunter notices how her singing makes him emotional.

 “I will find my place in the world.”

 “Yeah.”

 “I will be happy.”

 “Douple yeah.”

 “It doesn’t matter that I start forgetting how things look like.”

 “You can still touch and feel. You have whole life to live, Hunt.”

 “You still want me?” he asks later, bit tipsy from alcohol and Sebastian. Fingers are under his shirt and lips leave mark on his neck. His legs are pushed open and Sebastian’s hands are hot on his thighs. “I make you feel so much that you are going to forget your own name.”


	18. I take a part of you with me now and you won't get it back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, okay. This one is more like Hunter/Nick/Jeff friendship than Huntbastian but I still think this belongs in this collection. 
> 
> Sebastian is an ass in this one. Title from Hollywood Hills by Sunrise Avenue. 
> 
> Nothing else to say.

“You are drooling, dude”, Nick says and Hunter flinchs. His friend bursts into laughter. Hunter wasn’t drooling, but he can’t deny that Sebastian Smythe is pretty attractive. He isn’t sure why Sebastian is so special that all the girls and probably half of the boys are willing to chase him. Of course Sebastian is pretty, he has sparkling green eyes, lean long body and handsome face, but there are other equally good-looking guys. Maybe it’s the way how Smythe carries himself. He is definition of pure confidence, is able to talk with anybody and can make situation comfortable to shyest people if he just wants to.

Hunter steals one more glimpse of Sebastian before turning to meet his two friends, Nick and Jeff are sitting comfortably on the sofa, limbs together and eyes hazy from feelings. It makes him almost jealous. It’s now so easy for them, Hunter still remembers how scared both boys were, when they decided that hiding would end. Jeff was almost in tears, when they went to school holding hands but everything went smoothly.

They were confused and on the alert, boys didn’t go anywhere alone. They shared kisses on the breaks like all the other couples in school and in the end they just decided that maybe Sebastian Smythe’s magic covered them too. Nobody dared to say anything insulting to captain of swim team and it wasn’t bad that Nick was member too. He isn’t best but pretty essential anyway.

“But seriously, Hunter. You have to do something to that crush. We have watched your puppy eyes long enough. Smythe plays in same team with us, so why not? You have nothing to lose.”

Jeff has dangerously good and logical points even though Hunter isn’t exactly sure if he likes just guys. He still thinks girls are beautiful but hasn’t been attracted to one since he was twelve. So he is at least bi. And yeah, maybe he and Sebastian are in the same team, but social ladder separates them. Sebastian is on the highest top with his twin sister Stacey and Hunter – he isn’t at the bottom but still so far below Sebastian that other boy can’t ever spot him without Hunter’s own activity.

Hunter is just Hunter. He likes Maths and Physics which doesn’t make him exactly sexy even though he isn’t as hopeless as some other guys with same interests. They don’t seem to understand importance of showering and are always willing to present their most embarrassing hobbies at school. Sebastian Smythe doesn’t need to know that Peanuts-comis are Hunter’s biggest guilty pleasure.

“As you probably know, twins have that huge birthday party in two weeks.” Hunter raises his eyebrow. Their birthday party has nothing to do with him, he doesn’t have an invitation in his hands. He had seen Stacey with little creamy envelopes and Sebastian smiling calmly to his sister’s enthusiasm.

“I’m probably sitting at home and watching horror movies, when Sebastian hooks up with some hottie”, he complains and Jeff winks.

“I have to tell you some hard facts. Smythe owed me one and he said I can bring an extra to their party.” Hunter isn’t immediately open for this king idea. He nods to Nick. “You aren’t taking him?”

“My cousin is getting married on same Saturday, so it’s not going to happen. My mom didn’t believe her ears, when I asked if I could skip the wedding.”

“But if you decide to come with me, we are going shopping next weekend and after that I’ll cut your hair. No arguing about that. You have to start using all your potential.”

 “Being in same party is just first step”, Hunter continues. Discussion is exciting and scary. Hunter has perfect grades but his social life is little bit poorer, he hasn’t ever been in a party full of drunk, restless teenagers and it makes his cheeks blush, when Hunter wonders what could happen in that big, dark house.

“Smythe notices all pretty boys around sooner or later”, Nick promises and Hunter swallows. He doesn’t know if this is a good idea at all but maybe they are right. Something should be done, and Hunter has no real change to embarras himself, Sebastian has seen all desperate boys before. Hunter couldn’t really do anything suprising.

 Jeff snorts, when he arrives and sees what Hunter is planning to wear. “No, no no, not that horrible sweater or those jeans. Why didn’t you take any of those clothes I specially chose to you?”

Hunter tilts his head feeling horribly innocent. “Them were pretty tight.”

“Yeah and that’s why them are perfect. It’s time to show that body of yours.” Hunter trusts Jeff, he can’t really do anything else, so he takes those blue jeans and white t-shirt. It feels like clothes wouldn’t cover anything but Jeff kisses his cheek and says Hunter looks awesome.

 Stacey is at the door checking invitations. She gives Hunter beautiful, warm smile and nods to Jeff.

“This isn’t your usual pretty thing.”

“No, this is my best friend. Nick had other stuff to do, he couldn’t come.”

Second smile is exactly as dazzling as previous. “That’s fine, sweetie. He is cute too.” Both of them get kiss on the cheek before they are free to go. Air around boys smells strawberry and Hunter is bit confused.

“She is quite…”

“Yeah, she is. I think it’s typical Smythe charm.”

They should stay together. House is full of people, and Hunter just feels comfortable beside talkative and joyful Jeff, who knows so many people and has word or two to everybody. Hunter doesn’t really have to say anything, his friend is bubbly enough for both of them.

But of course it happens later. He turns around and Jeff isn’t there anymore. Hall is full of dark shapes and Hunter really doesn’t want to see boy and girl who seem to be really, really close friends. Suddenly long fingers squeeze his arm gently. It’s Sebastian whose eyes are sharp, when he studies Hunter’s body.

It’s naked feeling. Sebastian’s piercing gaze doesn’t leave him.

“Who are you?” he asks, voice deep and bit tired. It has been long night and some of the guests are already sleeping on sofas or in numerous guest rooms of the house. Hunter tells his name in bit shaky voice and Sebastian looks curious.

“Do you think I’m beautiful and desirable?” Straight question makes his cheeks hot. Sebastian is in Hunter’s personal space, breath is tickling Hunter’s skin and fingers draw circles on his skin. What can he say? What Sebastian has on his mind? He just nods. There are two roads where it can lead.

Sebastian pulls him smirk on his face. “Come then, cutie.” Hunter follows like a sheep. Is it really true? In real world Sebastian Smythe shouldn’t be even a bit interested in Hunter, who is so ordinary and boring.

Hunter doesn’t know how to kiss. It just doesn’t happen naturally but then he gets to know that Sebastian is very willing teacher.

“Let me take care of you, cutie”, he whispers in Hunter’s ear. It’s wonderful, scary, horrible and lovely. He is pushed on Sebastian’s bed – probably, Hunter doesn’t have time to check their environment.

He stares at the white ceiling, when Sebastian does things. He is hard and touching is new and good but somehow it’s also wrong. He shouldn’t do this because Hunter isn’t this kind of boy. Sebastian had simply chosen him because Hunter was there looking like a scared bunny with his big, lost eyes. He could be anybody, he doesn’t mean anything. This is wrong. But still Hunter doesn’t say anything, when he is undressed. He spreads his legs to Sebastian and closes his eyes. He is willing to kiss other boy, hoping that it would take pain away. It doesn’t. It’s not beautiful or doesn’t get easier. Hunter feels almost dirty beneath Sebastian’s hard body.

One hug could still fix everything, when it’s over. It doesn’t happen. Other boy turns away and Hunter stares at his back.

He hasn’t slept even a minute, when Sebastian wakes up. He stretches without noticing other boy but when Hunter sighs, Sebastian’s eyes are full of fire. “Why are you still here? Take your clothes and go. Breakfast moments aren’t my thing, we are done now.”

His lips are pressed together but trembling is impossible to stop. No matter how badly his body hurts, how horrible every step is, Hunter wouldn’t cry here. He takes his clothes and closes door behind him. Huge house is quiet and he can get out without seeing familiar faces. His self-control lasts exactly until that moment, when he is at the bus stop. Other people and driver look worried, when they see his wet face and swollen eyes but luckily anybody doesn’t have questions.

Hunter passes his mom, she is in the kitchen making breakfast and hasn’t been worried because Hunter lied that they would go to Jeff’s place after “little” party. Now he hopes it would be true. They would have watched silly comedies and slept together in Jeff’s huge bed.

He wouldn’t survive this without his friends, so Hunter sends simple text message. Hopefully it tells enough about last night’s happenings.

They would get to his house in ten minutes. Hunter is lying in his bed and hoping that whole world would disappear. He is sore and aching and doesn’t know how to go to school next day. He isn’t afraid of mean comments – Hunter isn’t so significant that Sebastian would comment anything about him, but it’s humiliating enough that Hunter himself knows.

World doesn’t seem so merciless anymore, when he hears their voices from downstairs and boys come to his room. They have movies, comics and junk food. “Does it feel really bad?” Jeff asks kissing his forehead. Hunter just nods, tears tickling his eyes.

“I’m sorry, sweetie. I shouldn’t have taken you there and especially I shouldn’t have left you alone. I just thought you had already left home. I was so fucking stupid.” Hunter hugs him. It’s impossible to blame Jeff who is most well-meaning person Hunter has ever met.

They build a pillow wall around him. Jeff cuddles with him determinedly, when Nick starts the movie. There isn’t too much space, when third boy takes his place in Hunter’s bed but they don’t complain. Closeness is familiar and comforting, they have been friends for long time, and nothing changed, when Jeff and Nick started dating.

“He isn’t worth your tears”, Nick promises.

“You’ll find your dream prince, gorgeous”, Jeff continues. Hunter just sighs but lets them comfort him. They are right. Going to party had been a big mistake. It should be forgotten soon, so Hunter could move to better and bigger things. After all world is full of boys who like boys, there would be one for him too. But right now he wants to spend few moments wallowing in his misery. He is hurt and it’s totally okay.

On Monday morning Nick is furious, when he goes to swim team practise. Smythe is there, looking fresh and ridiculously good, and at the same time Nick’s best friend is lying in bed and feeling miserable. Hunter had promised that he would come to school on Tuesday and Nick is going to make sure it happens. But now he wants to talk to Sebastian.

“Come here, Smythe”, he orders. Taller boy is so surpised that he actually follows Nick to next locker room, where they could talk alone.

“You shouldn’t have fucked him.”

“Why not? He wanted to get fucked and got what he was looking for.” Sebastian looks bored. Nick hasn’t ever exactly liked him but until now he had thought that other boy is at least decent human being. But maybe he had been wrong.

“He wasn’t looking for a fuck. He has been crushing on you god knows how long. Do you understand how scared he was? How it hurt? You took away something, what Hunter can’t get back.”

Nick knows he couldn’t ever win Sebastian in a fight, other boy is simply stronger and faster and Nick isn’t really violent person. But he wants to do something and before Nick has really thought it, his small fist hits Sebastian’s face. It hurts him as much as it hurts Sebastian but it’s satisfying to know that he would probably have a black eye.

Boys are immediately pulling him away – they had been monitoring Nick and the captain and from their serious faces he knows that this would go to teachers. Sebastian can hurt Hunter horribly without any consequences but when Nick tries to pay back, it’s huge catastrophe. He gets detention for two weeks but it’s worth it, when Sebastian’s injury makes Hunter’s face sunny.


	19. no one can ever break us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "...Sometimes I have thought that you love these things more than me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm seriously worried, I have to leave my laptop for two days because I'm going to my parents' place and I don't wanna carry it to uni and then to city, so I have no solution to this :D So little drabble-thing and some personal football-feelings.

”What are you doing, babe?” Sebastian asks, when he peeks to the bedroom. There are several cardboard boxes on the floor and Hunter is packing... It can’t be real, he can’t be packing his football stuff. Those jerseys and other things had been topic of several serious home talks during first year of their shared life in own apartment.

“What it looks like?” Hunter asks in sharp voice and folds jersey of his favourite player with loving hands. Sebastian likes sports too – of course. He is manly guy and has seen several high-class ice hockey matches from best seats but Hunter, secrectly emotional Hunter has always been bit different.

Sebastian has experienced everything with Hunter. He has comforted him after lost games and woken up from blissful sleep because of important goals. Those breakfasts when Hunter has analyzed every little detail of last night’s game have always been kinda enjoyable. Sebastian doesn’t understand much before his typical two coffee cups but it’s nice to watch his boyfriend, whose eyes are bright and voice eager.

“I see what you are doing, but why? Sometimes I have thought that you love these things more than me. Why are you putting them away?” Sebastian walks towards Hunter noticing his tense shoulders. He picks soft red and blue scarf and old Hunter would have snapped that Sebastian should be careful with it but now he doesn’t seem to care.

He gives a kiss on Hunter’s forehead and sits behind him. Sebastian’s boyfriend finds instinctively his place between Sebastian’s legs and leans a bit against his chest. “What’s the problem?”

“There is no problem. Maybe I have just finally grown up.”

“Hunt...” Now Sebastian’s voice is soft and gentle. “If you are doing this because of something what I said, don’t. You know I’m an asshole but I don’t really care about this. Sometimes I say stupid things but you wouldn’t be my Hunter without football. It’s not childish, I don’t really think like that.”

When Hunter is so lifeless and his eyes are so empty, Sebastian regrets every mean joke and insulting comment. This relationship is most precious thing in his life. When they met high school, Sebastian was amazed by Hunter. Finally somebody who saw behind his attitude, who wasn’t immediately ready to attact, when Sebastian was around. Sebastian was able to relax with Hunter.

“No, it’s not your fault. It just doesn’t feel same anymore”, Hunter tells fingers moving on Sebastian’s skin. “I think I have other interests. It used to be like my second family but... I don’t know anymore, Bas.”

“Some of the magic disappeared, when I saw them last summer. They were real people, not my wonderful heroes and idols. Now I don’t have time to watch matches. We are both so busy that I prefer time with you or going out for a run.”

Sebastian strokes his hair and kisses Hunter’s neck. Skin is sensitive and other boy sighs. “We are busy now. But what happens in three months, or next spring or in next tournament? Honey, you were crying, when Argentina went to World Cup final, are you sure you wanna throw that kind of love away? Give it time, you don’t have to hurry.”

Hunter is listening and thinking, Sebastian knows that.

“I wanted to take you to Barcelona. One day, when we have saved money.” Sebastian has heard that before and he likes the dream. He likes also idea of being independent. His parents could easily pay trip to Europe but Hunter’s background isn’t similar as his, and that’s why they have this slow but beloved project.

“You will do it one day”, he promises.

 Hunter takes his favourite jersey from the box. “Or maybe I still care but not so much as before. That would be okay too, right?”

 “Whatever makes you happy.”

 Hunter chuckles to himself. “I think I was bit overdramatic. I’m just so tired to feel guilty, when I don’t find watching games interesting.”

 “Maybe distance is what you need now. Little break and then again with new enthusiasm.”

 “Maybe”, Hunter answers. He doesn’t have hurry to get up. They sit on the carpet surrounded by his football collection and Sebastian swears that other boy wouldn’t hear any more mean comments about his passion.


	20. This moment, we own it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "...My parents weren’t happy, when they suddenly had a fluffy puppy running around half of the time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dammit. I'm not absolutely sure about this but I think there will be more these werewolf-things in this collection. I have strong feelings with this universe and wouldn't wanna leave it after one text. 
> 
> Title from We own it by 2 Chainz.

Sebastian smells it immediately, when new guy steps into the room. Jeff next to him on the sofa smells like peppermint and sea and that’s comforting and familiar but new scent is pure forest, it’s screaming to him. Innocent, eager Warblers don’t know anything but he can see how nervous Hunter Clarington is. His pale eyes are restless and whole strong body tenses, when other boy spots Sebastian. Hunter knows what he is, but he isn’t curious like Sebastian would be. He sees Sebastian as a threat and is ready to jump and attack. His body is glowing extra heat and hair getting new shade and Sebastian knows he has to do something.

He prays that Warblers don’t realize anything. Sebastian walks straight towards Hunter without showing uncertainty in his heart. He touches other boy’s arm gently – Sebastian doesn’t want to push into his personal space. “Control it. I’m not doing anything to you. Let’s talk later.”

Hunter’s face is suspicious. His forehead is bit sweaty and eyes are still too deep, animal is ready to take the lead. “How about if you go and wash your face? I’ll tell boys, they can wait few more minutes.”

It’s easier when last of the boys has left. They are totally clueless and Sebastian would like to keep that fact same. Hunter is watching out of window hands behind his back and Sebastian jus breathes his presence.

“I think it would be better if we went to our room. More private.” When Hunter turns around, Sebastian knows what tactic he would use. He isn’t usually easily touched but it’s sad to see how insecure other werewolf is. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“Don’t start that, Clarington. You are a werewolf and just few hours ago your first reaction was to slit my throat. This place is my home, I won’t allow other wolf to walk here if I don't know what is happening in his head.”

His eyes are clued on the door but Sebastian steps between him and escape route. They would solve this now. If it asked blood, Sebastian would give it. He doesn’t want to harm Hunter, who seems to be most lost wolf Sebastian has ever met, but he would to that if there wasn’t any other solution. Luckily that isn't needed, when Hunter finally nods and agrees. "Okay, let's go then."

Sebastian can be specially nice if he just wants, so he stops to buy two hot chocolates from cafeteria and his reward is shy, boyish smile. “Thank you”, Hunter says kindly before tasting the drink.

He is again serious when door of the dorm room is closed behind them. Sebastian sits on his desk, so he is able to control situation. Looks like Hunter doesn’t know what would be appropriate spot to sit down so Sebastian points his own bed.

“I always thought my parents know quite many werewolf-families”, he tells casually. It’s restless gene, deciding arbitrarily who would get that special condition and who wouldn’t. In Sebastian’s family he, his dad and twin sister have it, and his loving mom is sometimes losing her mind with her family full of these beautiful creatures. All of them adore her though.

In Sebastian’s childhood werevolves were always coming and going. Those years were full of laughter and fun and exciting stories. Sebastian is still keeping in touch with most of his parents’ friends because sometimes young guy has things he can’t talk about with his parents or sister and members of werewolf community are usually very open-minded. It was uncle Tim, who first told he was totally okay, when Sebastian confessed why he hadn’t ever had girlfriend.

Hunter is trembling. “It’s not a family thing. Not for me.” His eyes are very big and Sebastian almost regrets telling those things. Hunter is painfully jealous, every person with working eyes can see it.

“I was five, I think. I don’t really remember it, but it was some kind of accident, mom looked away for a moment and then everything was wrong. My parents weren’t happy, when they suddenly had fluffy puppy running around half of the time.” First thing coming to Sebastian’s mind is that at least puppy was better than dead kid but apparently Hunter’s parents wouldn’t agree with him.

“Then they sent me away. I was told I’m a freak of nature, unnatural, dangerous and bad. It was quite scary to smell you. Is that true what you told? I’m not only one, there are others too?”

“Not much. Maybe few thousand but yes, you aren’t any kind of freak.” Sebastian’s heart is aching. Hunter looks so hopeful, when he bites his lip. “Could you... Could you show your wolf, if it’s not too much?” other boy asks and Sebastian smiles.

It’s just easy nowadays. He feels gentle tingling, when his body and world in front of his eyes are changing. Hunter’s eyes widen, when he sees big wolf with chocolate brown fur and deep, golden eyes. “Can I touch you?” Sebastian bowes his head so Hunter wouldn’t feel scared.

Hand strokes him behind ears and Sebastian pushes against touch. He waits until Hunter is used to other wolf before changing back to his human form. “Can I see yours?” Sebastian asks immediately when his human mouth works.

Hunter looks away, he is shy and blushing and totally adorable. “Nobody has asked that before.”

He is blond wolf. Hunter’s wolf eyes have just weak shade of gold. His soft, pale fur fascinates Sebastian. Hunter wouldn’t be most safe companion in dark forest but he is beautiful. Gold, honey, peach even orange and red, looks like Sebastian can find all possible warm colours from his fur. Thin stripes are covering his white body and Sebastian is sure he hasn’t ever seen so gorgeous wolf.

“So, what do you say, am I allowed here?” Hunter asks laughter in his eyes, when he is human again. Sebastian touches his big hand. “Looks like I’m going to share this place with you. I’m sorry for earlier but you were kinda threatening and these boys... Somehow I feel like I’m responsible for them.”

“I think I understand.”

Sebastian would do more besides sharing his safe haven with Hunter. He would take other boy to meet his parents and show him what’s real wolf life. There he could run in the forest with a wolf whose fur is screaming their presence to everyone around.


	21. Sparks in the air

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little spider-drabble because I was once simply asked why I'm afraid of spiders and it was one of most stupid questions I have ever heard. Title borrowed from Sail Away by The Rasmus.

Hunter is just small ball on the bed, eyes big and body leaning against the wall. His whole body is stiff, other boy looks like he has seen a ghost and Sebastian is really curious to know why there is a coffee mug upside down on the floor between their beds. It’s minor point that Sebastian doesn’t remember last time when he as slept in his own bed. Even when Hunter is away, his bed is still more comfortable because there is scent of his boyfriend left in the pillows and blankets. Sebastian could be in risk of death and still he wouldn’t admit how he uses Hunter’s pillow as a cuddling-friend, when they are separated.

“What’s wrong, babe?” he asks tossing his bag on the floor. Hunter turns slowly and looks relieved and embarrassed. Sebastian is starting to get ideas, has something happened? It has to be about Hunter’s parents, something has happened and now they are blackmailing him to be a good son. Those bastards, why can’t they leave Hunter alone? He is getting really angry until Hunter gives an answer.

“There is a spider. In the mug.” This isn’t real. Hunter, his sexy and confident, awesome boyfriend is like scared little girl because of tiny, harmless spider. Sebastian isn’t really ready for this after his horrible school day. But obviously Hunter isn’t excited about their new roommate, so Sebastian takes an old magazine. Quick movement and spider is history.

Smile is trying to appear on his face because this is just so absurd. Hunter who is brave like a lion and has seen things Sebastian isn’t even able to think about is mess because of tiny, almost invisible spider.

Smile is horrible mistake, Hunter snaps immediately. “Fine! Laugh at me, ask stupid questions like everybody else and then dump me. I’m just a wimp anyway.” Hunter wants away, Sebastian tries to block his way to the door but it’s like trying to stop a power of nature. His boyfriend is simply too strong and pushes him away. He notices anyway how careful Hunter is, he doesn’t want to be too rough with Sebastian. Room is full of sharp corners, he could easily hit his head if Hunter just shoved him.

Then he is gone and apologies and I love yous die on Sebastian’s lips. He had been so stupid. Like usually, he hadn’t thought what he was doing and now teary Hunter is angry with him.

He shouldn’t have been so short-tempered, Hunter knows that. Sebastian’s reaction had been totally understandable and he had been more confused or suprised unlike some other people who know about Hunter’s stupid fear. It’s not warm evening and walking around stubbornly is simply childish. Curfew is coming, Hunter couldn’t be out much more longer and their room is only place where he could return.

Room is empty and dark, when he arrives there. Hunter considers if he should just take his pillow and blankets and inform Nick and Jeff about a sleepover in their room, but then door is opened. Sebastian is there looking handsome and holding biggest chocolate bar Hunter has ever seen.

“I was stupid. Like always. But I’m hopefully your stupid and that means something for me. Please, Hunter. Explain if you want and I’ll listen. Or we can forget whole thing, if you want but don’t be mad at me. I have apology chocolate, apology sex would be sweet and I even prepared a song. I did everything but I’ll do more if you want it.”

“Ask it”, Hunter demands eyes dark and Sebastian knows instinctively what they are talking about. For some reason Hunter needs that.

“Why are you afraid of spiders? Tell me”, he asks voice gentle and kisses other boy’s temple. He guides Hunter back to the bed and hugs him tightly. Other boy sighs, when Sebastian presses little kisses on his neck.

“I don’t know. With all other bugs I’m perfectly fine, I have no problems with my cousin’s pet snake or anything but spiders make me totally irrational. I haven’t had any traumatic childhood experience or anything like that but it didn’t make things easier, when my father and brother always laughed at me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You have promised me chocolate and sex, you don’t have to be sorry anymore. But could you promise that you will kill all spiders for me in the future?”

Sebastian straddles very willing Hunter and gives that promise. Other boy’s mouth is hot, he pulls, Sebastian pushes and it’s perfect.


	22. I tried carrying the weight of the world, but I only have two hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I wanted to ask...” Hunter doesn’t seem to get word out of his mouth and Jeff has no idea how to help his captain. “I think I need an advice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from Avicii's song Wake me up.

He is alone so it’s not ideal but Jeff has organized pretty comfortable Saturday anyway. He is lying in the bed, wearing just Nick’s old t-shirt and sweatpants. Jeff has his favourite book, three DVDs with his laptop and so much junk food that he could spend whole weekend in their room. Rain is falling on the roof and he takes better position in the bed.

Jeff isn’t prepared for visitors. Most of the boys are gone for the weekend but there is anyway knock on the door. For few seconds he considers silence as an option. Maybe unwanted visitor would take the hint. Boys who are still at school probably know that Jeff is also there but is it wrong if he wants to have some quality time just with himself?

Then his good nature wins.

When door is open, Jeff decides that this he couldn’t have guessed. It’s very nervous-looking Warbler-captain. Weekend has made even Hunter little bit less uptight. He has tight black t-shirt and worn black jeans.

“Can I come in?” Hunter asks, his eyes worried, like he would already regret. It’s clear that he has planned this and chosen a moment, when there wouldn’t be many other people. Hunter Clarington has something very serious in his mind.

“Yes, sure”, Jeff replies and his cheeks are little bit warm, when other boy follows him into their room. Suddenly it looks somehow too intimate – papers on the floor and open bag of chips next to Jeff’s pillow. Hunter is all about vegetables, fresh water, and morning jogs and maybe he has eaten some cake on his birthday or something like that. It makes everything little bit easier, when other boy’s poker face is still perfect even though he has to move few shirts before sitting down on Nick’s bed.

“I wanted to ask...” Hunter doesn’t seem to get word out of his mouth and Jeff has no idea how to help his captain. “I think I need an advice.”

“What kind of advice?”

“Advice with Sebastian.”

“Everything is okay with him, right? He hasn’t decided that freedom is more important than you. You aren’t breaking up?” Jeff was part of that force which pushed Hunter and Sebastian together and made them to try that thing between those two. Their relationship is something very precious in his eyes.

“We wanna have sex.”

“Okay... I’m hearing this, because...?” It sounds awkward to talk about anything related to sex life of Sebastian Smythe. Jeff is aware that other boy finds him and Nick totally vanilla and boring but it’s their business and they are happy with that.

It’s anyway exciting to see how nervous big and bad Hunter Clarington is. He walks around in their room, picks up magazine from Jeff’s table and organizes all his pencils before even looking at Jeff. Sit down, he would like to say but there is something very fragile in Hunter’s face.

“I’m a virgin.”

It’s unbelievable. Hunter who is so posessive about Sebastian and isn’t ashamed of touching in front of everyone. Hunter who kisses like champion and doesn’t blush no matter how dirty things Sebastian talks. He can’t be an unexperienced virgin, it just isn’t real. Jeff is beginning to get a clue where Hunter’s thoughts are going. He is crimson red now but looks somehow relieved, when secret isn’t secret anymore.

Jeff’s brain is working fastly. Why Hunter is so damn uncertain about this? It’s really suprising and he is sure that Sebastian had been surprised too but it shouldn’t be big issue. Hunter is a virgin, Sebastian can change that fact or not. It’s their business.

“I hope he isn’t pressuring you.” Jeff is almost sure that issue isn’t there. It’s possible to say all kind of things about Sebastian, and he is always little bit asshole no matter how much Jeff cares about his friend, but Sebastian wouldn’t ever force anybody in bed, there goes his line.

“No, Sebastian doesn’t know about this but he has been fine. I just wanted to talk to you because you are gay and... I know we aren’t best friends but I trust you.”

“Okay. What would you like to ask?” Jeff is thinking his own sex experiences, Nick’s big, darkened eyes and his hands touching Jeff’s body. First time had been laughing, blushing and discomfort. Later they had thought that maybe it was too soon. They had all the time in world, there was no need to hurry with sex. Nowadays there are hands and mouths and hot skin. It’s good, like really good and best, and most importantl, any of those things doesn’t feel too mature or dangerous. It makes him feel safe, when Nick’s hand is between his legs and mouth is marking him with love.

“Does it hurt?” It’s simple, typical question but Jeff can guess that there is more behind Hunter’s casual words. He knows these two boys, their strong souls and sharp words. Hunter and Sebastian are two alpha males and it scares Hunter that he should give control away.

“It’s not easy, especially not in the beginning, when you aren’t used to it.” Jeff doesn’t know how to continue. Comments in his head are straight from school nurse’s talks and it feels silly to say something like that to Hunter, who is still little bit scary. It looks uneasy when other boy squirms and Jeff knows he isn’t convinced about anything.

“But you don’t have to do it, if you aren’t okay with it. There are other ways to make your boyfriend feel good. We are going slowly too”, he confesses and just knows he is as red as Hunter was.

“Really? You seem to be so steady couple.”

Jeff remembers stickiness and confusion, when it wasn’t as good as they thought. He wanted closeness with Nick but not that way. Whole concept of penetrative sex looked gross and tiring and complicated. He is sure that they would do whole thing again in the future and enjoy it much more but right now he enjoys what they have. It’s precious and easy way to get to know Nick’s body and all things they can do together.

“We are. It just isn’t our thing.”

“How I’ll tell Sebastian?” It’s his next, worried question. Jeff tilts his head waiting for more words.

“He is so confident and experienced. Does he want to deal with this kind of baby?”

“You aren’t baby, captain. You are good-looking guy and you and Sebastian are two sides of same coin. You have been together for months, things have changed now. I’m absolutely sure Sebastian is willing to wait until you are ready.”

Hunter really thinks it. He smiles and looks worried then. Memories are running through his mind, and Jeff can see when Hunter decides to trust. “We have been through a lot together.” That’s true, their beginning wasn’t easy and weaker persons would have given up already. Hunter was afraid of simple kiss and Sebastian wanted to run away and leave this boy and all responsibilities he knew were coming.

He hugs Hunter who looks confused but pleased. Hunter has a habit to be over brave and he doesn’t want to show any kind of weakness, so Jeff is sure that this last piece of advice is most important. “You have to tell Sebastian if it doesn’t feel good, if it’s too much and you are hurting. This isn’t military school anymore, Hunter. This is your boyfriend who loves you. You don’t have to care about any “men don’t cry”-bullshit.”

He isn’t sure if Hunter is listening. He is drifting further, closeness is becoming just a memory. He is again their bit threatening captain who doesn’t show his humane side easily. Jeff can only hope that they would be okay.

Few weeks later Hunter comes to breakfast limping slightly. He sits at the table while Sebastian brings fruits and yoghurt. Jeff hasn’t ever seen Sebastian being so protective and nurturing. Every little gesture clearly makes Hunter happy and both of them have identical, lazy grins on their faces.

Hunter _giggles_ , when Jeff asks if everything is okay.


	23. American idiot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "...I can choose my friends and right now Sebastian looks only sane option."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have thought about my middle school times lately and that's why this was born. Title by Green Day.

He always thought that they are his friends. He has made mistakes, right, he has been bad leader but nobody is dead. Sebastian seriously thinks he doesn’t deserve it, their icy faces and cold voices or those sick pranks like long scratch on the side of his car. That made him cry. Sebastian drove the car away and then just sat there. Tears were flowing on his face and he hoped desperately that there would have been somebody holding him, somebody who could have taken part of the pressure away. But there wasn’t anybody.

Sebastian would never give up without a fight, so his head is always proudly up, he wouldn’t bow in front of them. It’s difficult though. He is too hard with himself and almost faints after lacrosse practise. At least there everything is quite okay because guys admid how essential he is as a captain. School work is pure struggling and imsomnia becomes his new, dear friend.

Stacey is worried, of course. Sebastian tries to hide his feelings but that has never been possible with his twin sister. She asks him to come back to France but both of them know it’s not possible in reality. He has to finish high school first, then there would be just freedom ahead of him.

A ghost is staring from the mirror, when it's time to go to meeting with new captain of the Warblers. Sebastian doesn’t know a thing about this guy and caring is difficult. His fighting spirit isn’t same anymore and probably this guy would be just one new bully to him.

Hunter Clarington is steadiness. Sebastian forgets his face, has just pleasant scent and calm voice in his mind. It’s absolutely uncomfortable to see happy faces of the boys. Like they wouldn’t even really care about Hunter or his new captain position. Sebastian’s tears are their only goal.

He goes through Hunter’s first practise somehow. New boy doesn’t seem to be willing to torture him immediately and it’s first time for months, when Sebastian is getting even a bit relaxed. He sits on the sofa following Hunter with his gaze. Other boy looks confident in front of his group, he is explaining things using his hand and looks like new captain has bunch of ideas.

Hunter makes him hopeful. He could be real friend and maybe he wouldn’t judge Sebastian when he would hear about those happenings sooner or later. But of course they do it first, he isn’t worth real change.

_“He ruined everything.”_

_“Blaine was hurt. Sebastian hates Kurt.”_

_“He shares himself to every man.”_

_“Slut.”_

_“Thinks he is better than others.”_

Voices are coming from that dorm room, where Hunter lives. They could have put him to Sebastian’s room, he is without roommate but it’s not clever to wonder why Hunter got single. It’s quiet for a moment and Sebastian is holding his breath. His eyes are stinging.

 Then there is Hunter’s voice. He had listened carefully but doesn’t sound specially impressed now.

 “Okay. And I should care about all this stuff because...?” It sounds innocent and Sebastian can imagine how boys are blushing, when Hunter doesn’t seem to get their point. For few seconds his smile isn’t lost.

 “It’s nice that you are so damn worried about my well-being but I seriously suggest you to get a life. I can choose my friends and right now Sebastian looks only sane option.”

 Hunter comes from the room offering his sunny smile to Sebastian. “Were you going to the breakfast? I’ll come with you and I was wondering if you could take me to bookstore after school. I have no car here...”

His babbling sounds already familiar in Sebastian’s ears. He takes Hunter to the bookstore later and follows other boy around in dusty and old place. Hunter is humming slowly and looks like he has found his safe haven. It’s somehow adorable how he enjoys himself there but Sebastian has no idea how to say something about it.

Thirty minutes later his arms are full of paperbacks and it’s like shopping with a girlfriend Sebastian has never had. “They have awesome collection”, Hunter explains his eyes shining and when they are finally out, there is one book also for Sebastian.

It’s newest Stephen King. He hasn’t had time to read it yet and now Sebastian has new, almost glossy book in his hands. “I noticed you were reading the Shining before Warblers practise, so I thought you could like this one too. I know I should have asked but that would have ruined my suprise.”

“Why are you like this?” Sebastian asks. His grip of the book is tight, like someone would pull it away in any minute.

Hunter puts two and two together and gets an obvious answer. “You heard that bullshit.”

“I’m not any kind of saint either, Sebastian. You did couple of really nasty moves but I don’t think you should spend forever paying for it. You seem to be funnier than any of those uptight bitches at school, so why I wouldn’t want to get to know you better? I hope we’ll be friends.”

They stop for a moment because Hunter is except strict and teachers’ favourite, also simply scary. He makes them work harder than ever and doesn’t treat Sebastian differently but all of them notice that they are on the same side.

Then it continues. Bothering text on his dorm room door, stolen text books and gym clothes. Worst is that horrible message they send to his innocent sister. They break him. Sebastian sits in his room with wet face and wonders should he cut his wrists immediately. Maybe it would be better to everyone.

Hunter doesn’t take it. Sebastian’s hands are trembling, when he opens the door and his friend pushes past him. “You have to have horrible headache. Lie down and I’ll take care of you.”

“What the hell happened to the bullying policy?” Hunter asks, when Sebastian has cold towel on his aching forehead. Sebastian flinchs at this words. He doesn’t like B-word. B-words is something to weaker people. His father would be furious if he heard B-word and Sebastian’s name in same sentence.

“I guess it’s about delicate flowers like Kurt Hummel.”

Sebastian almost starts crying again, when Hunter’s hand strokes his hair. “You aren’t bad person, Sebastian. I’ll fix this shit. It should have been done long ago.”

He calls an emergency meeting few days later and doesn’t answer, when boys are asking what’s wrong. This is something what he can’t understand. Hunter is first one to admit that he isn’t perfect guy in any way, but Hunter has never liked situations where all others are against one guy. Sebastian has to have some space to breathe.

Last boys are ten minutes late and Hunter would snap about it, if there wasn’t more important topic to talk about. So he just gives them a nod and boys sit down.

“My most talented Warbler isn’t okay and it affects my plans. That’s why I organized this meeting. I bet all of you have noticed who isn’t here.”

“Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?” Hunter asks, eyes burning and voice sharp. He has whole group under his control and if they were already careful with Hunter’s temperament, it’s nothing compared to this. “He made mistakes. Horrible mistakes. It doesn’t justify anything what you have done. Is it great to be group of pathetic, sick bullies? Sebastian apologized. He was fucking sorry but it wasn’t enough for you, you had to see him suffering.”

Hunter studies their faces, one by one. He finds regrets and honesty and maybe it would be enough. It’s quite sure that everything couldn’t be fixed, too much is broken and Sebastian wouldn’t trust these people anymore but maybe they could find peace.

“I have nothing else to say. You can go.”

Hunter finds his friend outside. Sebastian is on the track, his limbs are loose and face relaxed. It doesn’t look so maniac like before. He takes lap after lap in easy pace. Now he enjoys exercising instead of chasing his limits dangerously. He spots Hunter and stops. Sebastian doesn’t come to him but Hunter is very willing to do it.

“I talked to them.”

His face is blank. Sebastian shows no emotion, when he checks his phone and mentions something about water bottle.

“I know you, Seb. You don’t wanna look like a victim. You hate to be weak and you want to fake that everything is perfection and sunshine and fucking rainbows but you needed help and you still aren’t okay. These things don’t make me better or stronger than you.”

Then his phone beeps. Two simple words from Sebastian’s number. _Thank you._ They share a smile and it’s a relief to know that Sebastian’s proud nature is still there.

It’s exciting and scary how his eyes are slipping to Sebastian’s very nice-looking lips.


	24. By the way I tried to say

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I hate cold.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure what this was supposed to be but it's definitely bit different than I thought :D But yeah, I don't like cold weather at all (But I also dislike very hot summer times) and that's why this was born.
> 
> Title borrowed from Red Hot Chili Peppers-song By the way.

Everything looks just awesome through his sunglasses. Bright snow is sparkling and Hunter is dying to get onto his snowboard. Looks like weather couldn’t be better for his favourite sport which is rare delicacy nowadays. Stacey and boys are already gone but Hunter is bit late. It’s possible that he had tried to bribe Sebastian with a blowjob so he wouldn’t be so damned grumpy all the time. Then they had showered together and Sebastian’s hands had been so loving and gentle on his body.

Hunter sighs, when he hears familiar voice. “I hate cold.” Sight in front of him is absolutely ridiculous, when Hunter turns around to face his boyfriend. Sebastian is wearing all his winter clothes and has probably stolen few also from Hunter’s suitcase. His smooth boyfriend is gone, there is just this thick ball of clothes left. Only two determinated, bright eyes between his scarf and beanie are familiar.

Why did you came then? That’s the thing he’d like to ask. It had been difficult since they had started to talk about Christmas plans two months ago. Hunter’s old friends had mentioned this idea to visit their old favourite ski center. Hunter could spend ten days on his snowboard and party with his old buddies. It would be like all good times. He had become inspired too fast, had laughed when Stacey Smythe had informed that she could come too if there was room for one girl. Sebastian has always been natural athlete so they didn’t consider even for a second that maybe he wouldn’t be so excited about plan of his boyfriend and sister.

“Of course I’ll come.” His smile had been horribly tense and it had taken few days before Sebastian had lost his temper. “You never thought that asking my opinion would be good idea. Damn you, Hunter. I fucking hate cold, you should know that and now you are dragging me to place, where everybody is as stupidly excited about winter as you.”

It’s not a joke, when Hunter calls Sebastian his treasure so seeing tears of anger in his boyfriend’s green eyes had been horrible experience. Hunter would do anything to make Sebastian’s world better place but after long discussions they had ended up here anyway. Sebastian had studied website of ski center and noticed their many indoor acitivies. “I’m going to be fine, Hunter”, he had promised. “Swimming, gym, maybe I’ll try even riding.”

But now he is there looking like a pouting five years old. Hunter tries to soothe him. It gives them some long gazes, when he pulls Sebastian’s beanie and kisses his forehead. “I’ll spend the night with you. I’m not gone 24/7, there is still plenty of time just for us.”

Sebastian looks away blinking furiously. “It’s our first Christmas together, Hunter. I... Of course I knew it wouldn’t be ideal. It’s a fucking miracle that we are in same place without parents but I wanted to be with you. I was coming because I thought that maybe I could sit in the cafeteria and watch you having fun. I love you.”

It suprises both boys. Hunter has thought it. He feels something very strong, when he looks into Sebastian’s eyes or holds his dry, confident hand. But he hadn’t been brave enough to say those big words yet. He had been sure it would be clumsy and rushed and would scare this boy away. That’s last thing Hunter would like to see happening.

But now Hunter understands completely why Sebastian had been so unpleasant. He hadn’t thought that, Hunter had been so excited about the trip that he hadn’t remembered this. “I’m sorry”, he mumbles forehead against Sebastian’s.

Then somebody snorts. Hunter looks around – there are several similar groups of young people like their own and they don’t care about closeness between Hunter and Sebastian. They are simply left alone and Hunter is thankful for that. Person who was offended by them is middle-aged, very rich-looking woman who is eyeing two boys like disgusting bugs.

Hunter can’t believe it. He had just heard those three most important words from his boyfriend and now, on this exact moment he has to deal with this homophobic monster. Awesome.

“You just aren’t natural”, woman tells shaking her head. Hunter pushes Sebastian behind himself instinctively.

“Why?” he simply asks, his voice raspy and thick from emotions. Woman blinks like an innocent deer. She hadn’t waited that. “What is wrong with us? Can you tell me? He just said he is in love with me. What his emotions take away from you?” Hunter isn’t usually showing so much public affection like today, but when he has done it, people haven’t showed negative reactions. He isn’t used to this kind of bullshit and it’s terrible to notice how emotions are forming a lump in his throat. He is angry and sad and wants to fix situation with Sebastian.

He saves a picture of woman’s blushed cheeks for later examination. She turns away and Sebastian’s eyes are big, when they are again alone. “People are crazy. I haven’t ever gotten that shit. I don’t care if people have prejudices against us but why they have to share their stupid opinions?”

“I don’t know baby”, Hunter replies softly kissing Sebastian’s cheek. Scarf isn't covering his skin anymore. Other boy inhales shakily and Hunter remembers what they were talking about. “I love you too”, he says and it doesn’t sound exactly right. Hunter’s voice is higher than usually and he sounds uptight and nervous – not as confident as Sebastian.

But he accepts that and natural smile appears to other boy’s face. His hands find Hunter’s waist and it’s familiar how Sebastian holds him. “It’s real what we have, Hunt. It’s real and fragile and most important thing I have ever had. I wanna protect it and us.”

Hunter knows what has to be done so both of them could have great vacation. “Take off those stupid clothes before you are melting. We are going to pool.” Sebastian obeys happily but there is a wrinkle between his eyebrows. “What happened to perfect snowboarding weather?”

“You aren’t less important than snowboarding. We go to pool. After that we’ll take nice, hot bath in our room. I’ll massage you and I’ll make love to you. In the end you are just sweet puddle of pleasure. This vacation is possible to share between you and snowboarding. You were right, this thing is fragile and it needs time and effort.”

Sebastian’s soft kiss is full of promises.


	25. I know myself, I can handle the game

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some time I bumped into Kurtbastian-manip with El Clásico theme. That gave me lots of feels and ideas because I happen to be also big football fan, and El Clásico has special spot in my heart. Unfortunately I didn't find that picture again even I tried to google and google bit more.
> 
> Title from The Rasmus song called F-F-F Falling (I miss those times when I was still able to take this band seriously).

Talking starts long before his actual arrival. Sebastian is listening rumours, he is just human too and has special reasons to be interested in this exact kid. They are throwing questions, which one would he choose? Hunter Clarington has offers from finest and oldest clubs, he could choose his own favourite. Maybe red or sky blue in England, black and yellow in Germany or even something in Italy.

He has always drawn strict lines between public image and privacy so Sebastian knows something what curious fans and journalists don’t. He knows Hunter’s heart is beating for white club. When they had met in summer football camp as kids, even his bedclothes were decorated with that badge. That caused some delicious fights between two boys since Sebastian has supported dearest rival of white club as long as he can remember.

They were teenagers and excited about their first time in national team jersey, when that thing happened. They were lying on those more worn white sheets, when Sebastian gave Hunter his first kiss and jerked him off with bit trembling hand. Everything in Hunter’s body was hard, and warm skin felt good.

Hunter didn’t give him even a glance, when they met again. He was tense and didn’t play especially well in practise. He sat on the bench and was allowed to run to the pitch after 80 minutes, while Sebastian played whole match and gave an assist to winning goal.

It hurt a bit but after that Sebastian has met good amount of guys who have done their best to suck up his self-esteem. Nowadays Sebastian has to be careful with his little hobby. He is new golden kid of his dream club and stainless reputation in public eye makes his life so much easier.

He comes to Spain, signs a contract with that proud, white club and smiles calmly in pictures. Fans adore it when Hunter mumbles few words in broken Spanish. Sebastian stays at home and watches from his laptop screen Hunter’s presentation at famous stadium. He would have wanted to be there. Sebastian really considered it but knew that his face is well known in capital city and they would have eaten him alive.

It’s ridiculously huge relief to see fans’ love towards Hunter. He is beast on the pitch, sees ball as his personal toy and Sebastian is pretty sure that love life issues wouldn’t affect his playing anymore. It’s not easy to accept for all people how smoothly Hunter displaces old hero of the club.

Sebastian follows comments from their fanbase. Guys like his talent but it causes some embarrassing questions in interviews, when extent of his female fanbase is approached. They ask about girlfriends and Hunter smiles shyly. Pink shade of his cheeks is totally kissable and Sebastian smiles at the tv. He can’t help it.

They meet in dark October night. Stadium is roaring and singing, it’s impossible to hear properly. Hunter looks handsome in white, tight shirt. “Didn’t they have bigger sizes?” Sebastian shouts in mocking tone even though he thinks other boy is hot. Hunter doesn't look very different but there is one thing Sebastian misses immediately. His boyish, trusting smile.

It’s third time, when Sebastian is involved in this classic game, so it's not easy to suprise him anymore. He is taking care of his own playing and checking Hunter whenever he has time. Demanding fans make him nervous, Hunter has been excellent in ordinary league games but this is different, bigger in the eyes of their fans. He fights, tries to hypnotize time when they are losing and gives everything for team. Sebastian adores him because of that.

Hunter tackles him and Sebastian doesn’t remember how breathing works. Sky is black behind Hunter’s face and it’s exciting to feel all places of his body. “Are you hurt...?” He can see Hunter’s lips moving but moment is over, when his teammates surround two players.

They are provoked because of nothing. It annoys Sebastian because Hunter is frightened and backing off faster than light. He doesn’t wanna mess with these legendary football players in his first Clásico. Luckily his feet are steady, when Sebastian gets up to defend Hunter.

“He did nothing wrong.” They look sceptical but leave him alone.

“Are you okay?” Somebody asks hand touching his forearm. Sebastian flashes his typical smirk and hopes it's enough. He hasn't been totally okay for a long time.

They win. It’s always a big thing, Team is celebrating around him and Sebastian receives hugs and kisses. All the time he is staring at white back until he can’t see Hunter's number anymore.

Captain notices what’s distracting him. “Go to him, kid. They aren’t leaving yet.”

Most people haven’t left stadium, they are still watching but Sebastian doesn’t care what it looks like, when he runs towards white jerseys like it would save his whole life. Those guys don’t like it. Suddenly they look very tall and threatening even though Sebastian is tall enough too.

“You want to talk to kid?” Why on earth everyone seems to know everything about Sebastian’s issues related to Hunter? He nods and players in white jerseys open a path to him. Sebastian goes his mouth as a tight line and takes Hunter's hand. “Let’s go away. We aren’t talking here.”

He takes Hunter to the dressing room. There is no other place on his mind. If their fans knew, Sebastian would be dead golden kid. An enemy in the holy heart of the stadium. He doesn’t look specially impressed, though. Hunter just sits down and Sebastian is scared, when he notices how other boy conquers captain’s spot. It would be fucking miracle if he survived this night alive.

“What the hell, Smythe?” His voice is tired and Sebastian almost regrets. What will he say? That he has always had a little crush on Hunter, that he misses those times, when they were boys and Hunter cried his homesickness in Sebastian's bed. He tries something different, when he sees how Hunter covers his face with his hands.

“You were good. You are a star, Hunter.”

“Apparently I’m not star enough. Good try isn’t anything in match like this.” Sebastian knows it. He has also faced disappointed fans and curious media.

“And why do you even care? Why are we here?”

Because I like you. Because I have always thought that we could be good combination if you weren’t so uptight all the time. Because I know that any supermodel girlfriend can’t give what you need. I wanna know why are you lying to yourself and what I can do to make you feel better.

“I was safe with you.” Oh dear god, he wasn’t planning to say that. It’s true, but at the same time like a line from especially bad romantic drama movie. Hunter's eyes are very big and Sebastian thinks about it how he has been looking for that same feeling from numerous guys. He can’t remember any of those faces.

“It was years ago.” Now he sounds gentle and Sebastian is embarrassed. He had cherised that memory and Hunter doesn’t see anything special.

“Bastian.” He hasn’t that nickname for years. Hunter is heavy on his lap and Sebastian is suddenly shy. “I’ll stay in the city. You can show your apartment. I’ll make food.” His eyes are very bright and glassy and Sebastian wants to kiss him.

It’s scandalous, when Hunter leaves their dressing room wearing Sebastian’s jersey. Sebastian’s fingers play with white fabric and his eyes are teary. Everything would be okay.


	26. It's the most wonderful time of the year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "...Hunter almost shivers. “It’s a mini Christmas tree”, he replies softly."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't ever been good at writing Christmas fluff. I have tried it year after year and sometimes in the middle of summer too. It's just isn't anything I can do even though I absolutely adore as sugary as possible Christmas stories. 
> 
> Maybe my attitude is just too cynical, when I can't put my Christmas feels on the paper. But here is something else anyway. There is Christmas and also some angst and I have thought about Christmas lights and snow while writing this :D

Hunter loved Christmas, food, lights, presents and time with his family. And especially presents. Hunter was only child of loving parents so he was possibly little bit spoiled but regardless that he was a good guy, always ready to help his friends and far from selfish person.

Then came that bad Christmas, worst of his life. Mom found those magazines, when she was changing Hunter’s sheets. Them should have been hidden better, he had known that, and probably different kind of magazines describing women as sexual objects wouldn’t have been similar huge issue. It was almost innocent. Those glossy pages showed just beautiful men in beautiful clothes. Some of them were wearing just underwear but it wasn't porn. Hunter hadn’t even masturbated, he had been so confused and would have needed trustworthy listener, who would have taken his thoughts as they came.

Instead of that he got yelling and sharp slap on his cheek, when his friend’s mom left him at their front door. He didn’t go back to school. A week later Hunter was in the bus, going to military academy and his old friends didn’t get to know what had happened.

There he was told every day that real men didn’t like that other men that way. Hunter wasn’t taking it. He wanted to believe that he wasn’t bad, that there would be somebody to love him too. It was possible to try to beat gay out of him but destroying his natural goodness wasn’t that easy.

Then Hunter was lucky. Scholarship to Dalton. He was standing in front of his mirror and didn’t recognize that big guy who was about to change his camouflage uniform to snobbish blue blazer. He hadn’t had time to get used to it how buff but also smooth and fast his new body felt. 

When Hunter opened front door of his new school for the first time, tall and lean, green-eyed boy was waiting for him. He was supposed to give Hunter a tour at school’s area so he wouldn’t be lost on first his official school day. Sebastian Smythe greeted him with firm handshake and called Hunter gorgeous. He almost giggled and four hours later they were kissing behind the school building.

So it’s first Christmas for years, when Hunter feels completely safe. At Dalton he doesn’t need to watch his back all the time. Those guys and especially Warblers are sweet and accept everything in him. He hadn’t thought that combination of Christmas and Sebastian would be somehow problematic but now it doesn’t look good at all, when Sebastian is standing at the door and glaring at Hunter’s latest Christmas project.

“What is that?” His face is grumpy and eyes narrowed. Hunter almost shivers. “It’s a mini Christmas tree”, he replies softly. Tiny tree is covering Sebastian’s desk with it’s green branches but he still has lots of room to do homework or use his laptop. Hunter had used silvery and electric blue ornaments to decorate it.

He blinks and suddenly his pretty tree is lying on the shiny floor looking pathetic. Hunter bites his lip, when Sebastian yells something totally incoherent and turns around. It’s like going back to past, when everything what Hunter did was somehow wrong.

He hasn’t moved, when there is a careful, quiet knock on the door. It’s Jeff, one of their two closest neighbours who had obviously heard enough. Hunter doesn’t bother to be embarrased, when other boy sees his worried eyes and pouting mouth. He doesn’t say anything, just sits down beside Hunter and lets him lean on Jeff’s shoulder. They sit like that for a moment, Hunter is blinking furiously. He doesn’t want to cry. They could get over this whatever it even was. Maybe Sebastian was just stressed from school work or something like that.

“Do you want something? Glass of water or cookies? My mom just sent me a box”, Jeff asks quietly, when Hunter is calmer. He doesn’t want cookies or water. Hunter wants answers and boyfriend who doesn’t freak out because of harmless Christmas tree.

“I’ll get cookies anyway.” Hunter doesn’t refuse anymore, when he returns carrying two warm mug and little plate. All other boys get regularly gifts and food from home. Hunter is only one without any mail but usually Sebastian is happily sharing whatever he has received.

“I love you and Seb as a couple but I kind saw this was coming. He was so stupid and stubborn. Sebastian should have told about Stacey. I’m sorry that I didn’t warn you but it really wasn’t my secret to tell before this.”

“Who is Stacey?” Hunter asks softly. He is getting a headache and cookie isn’t so delicious anymore. This doesn’t sound good at all. Hunter had known that Sebastian has his darker sides, and things he doesn’t want to talk about, but this is probably bigger than anything what Hunter imagined.

“They were twins.” Twins. There is something uncomfortable in his stomach when we hears past tense. He had assumed that Sebastian is an only child and hadn’t asked any special questions. Family isn’t Hunter’s favourite small talk topic and he has good reasons for that.

“It was Christmas time when Stacey died. I’m not absolutely sure what happened but Sebastian hasn’t been totally okay after that. I’m not sure how pissed he gets because I told this but you deserve to know. Your thing is so good, captain.”

Jeff spends few hours with him. They watch a movie from Hunter’s laptop and talk about all kind of harmless things. Afterwards Hunter thanks him. He had gotten a change to think about everything in peace and Hunter knows he would try to fix things with Sebastian. Spending Christmas isn’t more important than him.

It’s very late when door to their room is opened. Sebastian’s steps are quiet and careful, he doesn’t want to wake up Hunter. But Hunter hasn’t slept. He has been lying in Sebastian’s bed and other boy makes suprised noise, when he notices that. “Come here babe”, Hunter asks and Sebastian obeys.

There isn’t too much space but both of them sigh happily, when their legs are tangled together and Sebastian’s arm is around Hunter. “Jeff told about... about Stacey”, he tells bravely and Sebastian’s smile is sad. “I know.”

“It was Christmas time. We were at my grandma’s place and Stacey took one of her horses out. Weather was fine, and she had been with horses before she even knew how to walk. Nothing shouldn’t have been wrong. Then her horse limped back without my sister. Drunken driver had killed her.”

Hunter wants to kiss him but Sebastian’s steady voice is forced to be calm, and kiss would mean tears. Green-eyed boy doesn’t want to break, he wants to explain.

“Christmas just hasn’t been same after that. Mom and dad wanted to forget and they... they kinda just forgot me too, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I was drifting from one bed to another. I didn’t have any kind of lifeline but then you came.”

Hunter kisses back, when familiar, salty lips find his own. Sebastian’s hands are steady on his hips and it would be so easy to get lost in him but he wants to end this discussion at first. Green eyes are sparkling, and Hunter almost regrets breaking the kiss. “You know. About Christmas. We don’t have to do any Christmas stuff if it makes you feel so bad about yourself. Pizza and Die Hard-marathon, everything is fine as long as I’m here with you.”

Sebastian’s shaky smile tastes so good. “Maybe it’s time to make better memories. How about a compromise? I’ll buy you new Christmas tree, we’ll watch action movies and eat Christmas cookies and pizza? I know what Christmas means to you, I don’t want to see too many sacrifices.”

It’s a fragile day. Most of the boys are gone so Sebastian and Hunter eat Christmas meal alone at their usual table. It’s weird without their babbling and laughing friends but also somehow romantic. They haven’t had too many official, fancy dates at nice restaurants because Hunter doesn’t want to see Sebastian paying all the time, so it’s good change to play that Christmas meal is one.

After that they take Sebastian’s car and just drive around. Other boy looks relaxed, he drives with one hand and is resting other one on Hunter’s knee. His skin is cold, when Hunter squeezes his hand gently. “Are you okay?” he asks. Maybe it’s some day possible to read Sebastian like open book but it’s still far away. Other boy just nods.

It’s absolutely quiet when they get back to empty, dark Dalton. It would be spooky if Hunter wasn't so full of pure Christmas peace. He takes Sebastian’s hand anyway and his boyfriend looks pleased. “I have a present for you.” Sebastian is about to open his mouth but Hunter shakes his head. “I don’t need anything.”

But Sebastian has bought a present. Or actually it’s more for Hunter’s “demon cat”. His present is luxurious, expensive cat bed. It has exactly same green shade as Sebastian’s eyes. Hunter’s absolutely favourite colour. Mr. Puss looks suspicious, when he sniffs bed and then curls up on it.

“I’d love to have one night when that cat doesn’t try to suffocate me at some point.”

Hunter laughs and kisses his boyfriend and wonders if they would get lost and have Christmas sex. Sebastian’s eyes are willing and dark but in the end they are just lying together in the darkness. Moonlight colours Sebastian’s skin and Hunter uses his fingers to write sweets words on his body.

“I haven’t visited the graveyard. I just couldn’t when I didn’t get any support. My sister has been there alone and I miss her so badly.”

“I’ll take you there”, Hunter promises. It’s easy to say anything, when night is so soft and full of promises about upcoming year but Hunter has no doubts. He would do it and then Sebastian wouldn’t worry about this thing anymore.


	27. (You take my breath away)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You are my free spirit, beautiful..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. I didn't believe we would see this day. I have always found mpreg fanfiction pretty gross but lately I have read bunch of bit different mpreg stories with little bit darker themes and without any graphical descriptions. That gave me inspiration to write my own text. 
> 
> Title borrowed from Eminem's song Space Bound.

”It has to be taken away.” Sebastian doesn’t recognize that voice even though it’s coming from his mouth. His lips are forming those words, that steely demand. Redhaired woman on the other side of table looks gentle and worried, and Sebastian is so scared for seconds that they would take his rights away.

But she just sighs and takes her computer mouse. “I can give you an appointment but there is no need to hurry, mr. Smythe. Your pregnancy is in early stage and you have still time to consider different options. Of course there is also your partner.”

Sebastian isn’t sure if he can survive rest of the visit without throwing up on to shiny floor of his doctor’s office. He had just felt funny, not his usual self. Sebastian had visited school nurse and there he had been put to hospital for some “basic tests”, all because of one, little gene. One special difference. He had always known about the possibility, it had always been a tiny voice in his mind. Usually it hadn’t been big thing – he is an alpha male anyway, so topping is natural for him.

But then came Hunter, innocent and naive Hunter and Sebastian’s mouth was dry and suddenly it wasn’t anymore scary to share everything with other person. He hasn’t been bottoming much, no matter how amazing it is and mentioning condom hadn’t been anything weird for Hunter. Now stupid accident is threatening his first real relationship.

One pregnancy isn’t enough to make Sebastian lose his burning nature. Redhaired doctor whose name he doesn’t remember gets to know exactly what Sebastian thinks about her attitude. “It’s my fucking body and I’m going to do exactly what I want with it.” Sebastian definitely isn’t shaking, when he gets to his feet squeezing new appointment paper in his fist.

He had almost forgotten that Jeff is still there, waiting him among coughing old men and tired kids who have disgusting, runny noses. Sebastian breaks down. He has no enough time to fix his usual shell before he spots those loyal, worried eyes. “What did she say, Bas? What is it?”

“I’ll tell in the car”, Sebastian whispers through his tears. Jeff is holding him, hugging him like a little child, and people around them probably think he has a terminal illness. Other boy pets his hair and presses a light kiss on the top of Sebastian’s head. “Come on, sweetie. I’ll help you.”

It’s true that his legs are bit wobbly so Sebastian gives up and trusts Jeff’s arm. Other boy leads him through halls to the bright sunlight outside of the building. “It’s a baby”, he informs immediately, when they are outside and alone. Jeff is surprised and his grip of Sebastian is suddenly tighter.

Sebastian knows Jeff. He knows how joyful and spontaneous other boy can be, and he is waiting for squeals of happiness and promises to babysit but now Jeff suprises with his maturity. “What do you want to hear?” Sebastian shakes his head. Images of pastel coloured room, tiny clothes and soft toys are dying impossibilities.

“I want to graduate from high school and leave to Europe after summer. In the future, maybe in five years I want to marry my boyfriend and have kid or two. Maybe. But not like this. I don’t want to be a freak, Jeff.”

Both of them know what he means. Male pregnancies aren’t common but them are noticed in the society. Men with that little difference are treated well but at the same time everyone behaves like their brain would be immediately gone, when first ghost of a bumb is showing. Sebastian couldn’t ever take it. He would be starving mentally and he is still too young and way too addicted to freedom. Sebastian Smythe is selfish bastard and he admits it happily.

They have arrived at the car and Jeff’s face is sheepish, when they both notice how he is about to open car’s door to Sebastian. “Sorry, Bas”, he smiles and goes around car to his own door. Sebastian doesn't take it badly, Jeff had really tried and he appreciates that gesture.

It's not easy to tell Hunter, who doesn't know a thing about his hospital visit and smiles softly, when Sebastian gets to their room. Sleepy boy pulls Sebastian to his lap, and his heart is fluttering because Sebastian isn't used to this kind of things. It's still exciting how Hunter wants him, not his body. Arms around his waist are safe, and Sebastian swallows because it's too much, too complicated compared to their usual simple closeness.

Where were you? I missed you. I had free afternoon and I thought we could have been together.”

Sebastian is scared and ready to hurt before getting hurt so that's why he just blurts out those words without thinking more.

“I'm pregnant.”

In typical teen romance boyfriend and supposed father of the baby would get mad but not Hunter. Of course perfect and loyal boyfriend Hunter doesn't react like that. His stupid and lovely, open face gets new kind of glow and his right hand is really sliding to Sebastian's flat stomach. He slaps it away and feels horrible because of Hunter's innocent gaze.

“There isn't going to be any fucking baby wonderland.”

He doesn't understand immediately what's behind Sebastian's words. Then Hunter's face gets a darker shade. “Beautiful... Don't, you don't have to kill...”

“I'm not beautiful when you think you can decide what I'm doing with my body.” He gets tense and suddenly even touching Hunter is bad idea in his head. Because Hunter can get under his skin. If he touched Sebastian and held him, Hunter could really turn his head to that direction towards ruined future and lost golden changes.

Sebastian backs off and Hunter gets up too. “We can figure this out, beautiful. It's just... I didn't you know you could... It would make us family, she or he would be little human being, half from me and half from you. Doesn't that touch you?” It's bad because Hunter is making holes to Sebastian's walls around his heart but worse is coming and that makes him furious instead of emotional mess.

“Maybe baby would help my folks to accept you. My mom would be excited about grandchild.” Now Sebastian slaps him and Hunter's eyes are full of shock.

“Let me make this clear. Your parents won't never accept me. I'm not going to be member of Clarington household, no. It fucking scares me how you would use me as a baby machine and then drag innocent child to that hell house so you could try to please those twisted people one more time. Go get a girlfriend, Clarington. That's what you want anyway.”

Sebastian is behaving like a wounded animal. He pushes Hunter away without wanting to explain himself. He sleeps in Jeff's room because his roommate is away and next morning he is in the office, explaining how he and his roommate have some serious issues that would affect also schoolwork. Poor James is thrown to Sebastian's old bed and Sebastian gets place in Jeff's room. There he can decide freely what to say or not to say.

That day is horrible. Without Jeff he couldn't do it but blond boy takes him to hospital, whispers encouraging words and promises to wait Sebastian until they would be done with him. He is vulnerable and open there, too many people see his body and touch him. For few minutes Sebastian is sure he would get a panic attack even though he hasn't ever experienced one.

Of course that empty feeling isn't real but there is something at the background of his mind when door is opened and Sebastian can leave. There would be blood, they tell him. Blood and pain for few days and after that it would be just a mark in his medical history.

Jeff has bought a milkshake. At first it doesn't look tempting at all but soon Sebastian finds himself tasting sweet thing. His body is somehow aching and coolness is okay. Not good or excellent but okay.

“Do you want to talk?”

“I don't think I have anything to say.” 

It sounds simply mean so Sebastian tries again. “Thank you. Without you I would be still wondering what is happening with me and everything would lead to huge mess. Now it's over.”

Sebastian doesn't know what to do when school is over. His mom gets to know enough from few absent-minded things and makes her suggestion. “Aunt Marie is travelling whole summer. She would need somebody to keep an eye on her house”, Caroline Smythe tells. She knows about a boy and pregnancy but she also recognizes Sebastian's private nature. They share that tendency. He would tell more if he felt like that. Until that moment Caroline couldn't do anything except wait with patience and love.

Beach hasn't ever been his place but now he finds it extremely peaceful and calming. House of aunt Marie is big and dark but also cozy and quiet. He likes it. Sea is seen from the window of his bedroom and it's easy to get to city centre where they would have restless bars and nameless people whose wordless compliments would make him again believe that he is sexy and invincible.

He goes to beach every day to get his skin tanned. On most days Sebastian plays beach volley with laughing boys or girls. He gets to know people and Facebook is full of new friend requests every day. Those people are open and relaxed, few friendly words are enough to stop too friendly gestures from girls. “Do you have a boyfriend, then?” Pretty, blue-eyed blonde Melissa asks. Sebastian returns her smile.

“I hope so. You know, it's complicated. We got out of school and now you should decide what to do with the rest of your life. Anybody would be confused.”

Summer is ending and Sebastian still has a flight ticket to France. He was supposed to start there and then examine every damned country in Europe's area. Next summer he would have been back as wiser, older and more experienced person. He would have been ready to face new challenges. Now he isn't sure what to do. Sebastian is almost falling without Hunter, he knows that.

One of the girls notices him first. Tanya has chocolate brown, long hair and amazing brown eyes. She is really stunning in her yellow bikini and seeing new prey makes her smile. Sebastian is automatically jealous, when he spots boy who doesn't have a shirt on. “I'm sorry sweetie”, he says to Tanya. “This is mine.”

That words is playing and again in his head even though Sebastian isn't sure about it before he touches Hunter. It's like there wouldn't have been last lonely weeks without him. Large hands find his hips and Sebastian smiles when he imagines eyes staring at them. They have always been good-looking couple.

Hunter nuzzles his neck and inhales Sebastian's sunny scent. He knows he is similar like before, more tanned and maybe little bit skinnier but there are no significant differences. Nobody knows experiences behind his hard gaze.

“I have some savings. Gap year abroad was your dream. If you still want, I'm going to follow you. Pressuring you was wrong. I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me most. I thought that being supportive with baby-thing was what you needed but of course I should have known you. You are my free spirit, beautiful and I wouldn't want to tame you completely.”

Sebastian's new friends whistle when he kisses Hunter.

 


	28. #PLL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ”Are you really watching that girls' shit?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have spent three days with my PLL-season four and that's why I wrote this little drabble.

It's kinda adorable sight. Sebastian is buried under his blankets and his sparkling eyes are focused on laptop screen. Hunter knows about his obsession with crime shows so he is waiting something similar also this time. But it's not. He sits down on the bed besides his boyfriend and smiles at the purring sound from Sebastian's throat, when Hunter pets his hair gently.

 It takes few minutes before Hunter recognizes show Sebastian is watching so intensively. Four pretty girls are running back and forth, texting each other and just being overdramatic. Hunter hasn't watched it personally, it has been a while since military academy but still he finds focusing on any tv-show extremely boring. He has every time something more motivational to do. ”Are you really watching that girls' shit?”

Sebastian gets tense and shuts down his laptop. ”Yeah. I don't need to watch that girls' shit. Hunter opens his mouth because it came out wrong way, and oh god, he just isn't good at this dating stuff. ”I was just suprised”, Hunter tries to mumble. ”I didn't know you like shows like that”.

Raised, clearly mocking eyebrow isn't a good sign. He has learned that during last months with Sebastian. ”Now you are saying you didn't know I'm girly.” It's Sebastian's way to react. Instead of just accepting an apology or forgetting whole thing he gets dramatic and wants to start a fight. Hunter just needs to be that person who doesn't let bursting emotions to lead him. That was first lesson he had gotten from Sebastian's mom when they had met for the first time.

He takes Sebastian's hands and forces him to make an eye contact. ”I'm honestly sorry, babe. I didn't think what I was saying and you are not girly. It doesn't matter for me what kind of tv-shows you like.”

Sebastian's face is playful and he smirks at Hunter. ”Do you watch with me then?” Hunter considers suggestion. His homework for the weekend is already finished and daily jog is done. He pushes Sebastian lightly and he takes a hint to make some space for Hunter.

When they are showing tiny brunette in pink shirt and very short skirt – her legs are damned fine, even Hunter can admit that, Sebastian's face has interesting shade of red. ”Why do you look like you are about to faint?” He asks curiously.

His boyfriend makes an embarrassed sound. ”Lucy Hale is my straight thing. For her I would make an exception in a heartbeat.” And at the same time Hunter had been wondering which one of show's two fine guy faces was hotter. He hides his smile and just presses a kiss on Sebastian's cheek.

Pretty Little Liars is confusing tv-show, Hunter decides it very soon. He doesn't get very much out of it, even though Sebastian tries to explain what is happening when they go through several episodes. Names and faces and that fucking A are just one big ball of mess in his mind. But some scenes are anyway quite funny. His favourite character is Hanna, dramatic and bit silly Hanna who still looks like a good and loyal friend, and of course they get into an argument because Sebastian thinks Hanna is stupid.

But best thing is to watch how Sebastian enjoys his time. He notices every little detail of every scene, loves characters like his own children and has lots of opinions about A and all the crazy happenings. Eventually Hunter falls asleep and Sebastian kisses him for good night.

 


	29. Are you waiting 'til the time is right?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ”I'm going to be there. You won't be alone. You and me, babe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I borrowed title from Nickelback's song. This bad year is ending and I don't know what to say about this. Hopefully 2015 will be better.

It's absolutely quiet besides Sebastian's heavy breathing. New Year's Eve is going to be weird, Hunter thinks. It's not bad in any way, even though their situation is really hard. He remembers last New Years with Sebastian, jealous eyes licking his body at clubs. He had felt like a winner, when Sebastian had showed so naturally that Hunter was his choice number one. Dressed in white, devilish smile on his face Sebastian was like sinful angel.

Now they have spent ten months fighting. Hunter remembers that cold February morning when Sebastian had taken all his bravery and showed those test results. He had been in the middle of breakfast but after seeing those papers everything about it was forgotten. Hunter hadn't cared about classes, he had simply carried Sebastian to the bedroom and made love to him covering his body in sweet, little kisses.

He knows what Sebastian tried to tell but he was denied every time. Hunter kissed his lips or made him moan – neck has always been Sebastian's weakness. Hunter dropped promises. ”I'm going to be there. You won't be alone. You and me, babe.” Some people would have said that saying those things so easily was stupid. For Hunter it was just simple act of loyalty and love.

He hasn't broken those things. He and Sebastian have gone through everything together. When Sebastian was too shocked, too deeply in his own pain, it was Hunter who listened his doctors and collected papers and instructions and allowed Sebastian to be lost in his own mind.

Hunter cleaned the mess after Sebastian threw up in their bed. He kissed Sebastian's forehead gently and helped him to get a shower. He was too weak to be allowed there alone. ”I'm not as pretty as I used to be”, Sebastian laughed tiredly. He was sipping water carefully and Hunter was relieved to see that he was able to take it. ”I love you, angel”, he just whispered holding other one tightly.

Sebastian has spent whole autumn in the hospital and he hates that with his whole burning heart. Hunter loves those moments, when his boyfriend is like in good, old times. Because with that guy he fell in love. With that guy who has a fragile heard under his hard shell.

Now they have few precious days for themselves before Sebastian would go back to hospital. Hunter prepared everything, he rented little cottage and bought food for their weekend before driving to the hospital.

Little cottage is like a safe haven. They are pretty far from too curious people who watched them closely when boys visited tiny local shop, and Hunter helped Sebastian to walk like he is used to do. It was bit slippery and broken ankle is last thing they need right now. During their drive back Sebastian demanded him to stop. Hunter followed Sebastian who stepped out of the car and started looking for a perfect picture of sunrise with his phone. When other boy was satisfied with this first task, of course Hunter was forced to pose. But right now there isn't a thing he wouldn't try to give to Sebastian. They kissed icy sunrise as their background and Sebastian tasted like cool peppermint, not stuffy sickness.

”Hunt?”, Sebastian asks suddenly and Hunter stretches himself to give a kiss on the top of his head. Sebastian's hair is so thin but now it can't bother him now. Sebastian is snuggled in the corner of the sofa, thick blanket covering his body from shoulders to toes. Hunter knows what he wants and other boy sighs happily, when Hunter's strong arm around his shoulders gives a change to share body heat.

”This can be our last New Year”, Sebastian says sadly. They haven't talked a lot about cold facts or future. They have taken one day and then other one without thinking too much. But if he wants to have this discussion now, Hunter wouldn't protest. 

”It makes me so jealous when I even think about it right now, but you have to do it. If I won't be here next year, you are going to clubs. Wear something tight and pretty and show that body of yours. Make few drunken mistakes, gorgeous. I have always been little bit worried that maybe you haven't experienced enough. I have been only guy for you.”

He knows what's behind those fake, carefree words. Sebastian's eyes reveal it. He hasn't ever been big with words but Hunter understands. Sebastian is grateful and scared but also brave. ”You are still here, babe And if I know you, you are holding tight. We have still hope.”

There are a bowl of popcorn and few movies on the table. They finish one, sixth Fast and Furious and watch half of next one. Until then Sebastian's head is heavy on his shoulder. Hunter wipes his tears away and lowers Sebastian on the sofa carefully. He doesn't want to leave him alone so Hunter watches fireworks from the window. Right before midnight there are slow steps behind him and gentle lips on his neck.

Twelve months later Hunter can't believe how bad previous New Year had been. They are at their own apartment, surrounded by their friends. Sebastian is talking with Kurt and looks simply amazing in those ass hugging jeans and tight, red shirt. He is still pale and warmth has made his cheeks bright red but Sebastian is okay. Being okay now doesn't mean forever, everything could come back in the future, but being afraid of life itself all the time would be wasting of their time.

”Do you have it?” young man beside him asks eagerly and Hunter smiles at Jeff's attitude. Yes, he has it. Simple, beautiful ring in the dark blue velvet box. ”Do you think he says yes?” Hunter is almost sure that Jeff is just teasing, but throws new question just to get his thoughts away from that unnerving idea that maybe Sebastian's answer wouldn't have three letters.

”Will you be my best man?” Hunter asks and now Jeff's dark eyes have clearly teasing gaze.

”Sorry, but no. I'm Sebastian's, I'm sure about that.” Hunter shoves him with all love but later in the night, when new year has started, Sebastian confirms Jeff's words with shiny eyes and deep kiss.

 


	30. Butterfly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It's my favourite colour."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea what this thing is. I have played with it for some time now and because I'm leaving to Norway with bunch of unknown people, I'm dealing with my nerves by writing.

Sebastian is thirteen when he tries make-up for the first time. His twin sister Stacey has so many fascinating tiny tubes and small, shining boxes on her desk. She wouldn't ever notice that Sebastian had stolen one unused mascara. His hand is surprisingly steady when he tries it. On dozens of mornings he has watched Stacey or their mom doing this. It’s not rocket science.

He likes it. Mascara seems to make his dark lashes longer and thicker. His green eyes look deeper and somehow mysterious. Sebastian stares at his reflection and laughs uncertainly. Anybody couldn't know.

"Did you know that it’s not sane to laugh at your own jokes alone?” Stacey’s voice asks behind the door. Maybe Sebastian is bit hysterical. Trying whole thing finally after weeks of worrying has relieved lots of stress.  Words of his sister make everything somehow even funnier. It’s horrifying and amusing to think what Stacey would say if she saw Sebastian’s eyes right now.

Sebastian isn't sure why he does it. Showing his carefully decorated face in public is too scary idea, he wouldn't ever do it. That would cost too much, it wouldn't be similar simple thing like his coming out as a gay. It’s not really about looks. Sebastian has his mom’s magnificent, green eyes and hist fathers’ tall body and thick hair. He would be nice-looking young man in the future -  nobody doubts Smythe genes.

He doesn't feel like he is a girl in wrong body, no. Sebastian is confident about himself even though his young body looks like he is just long arms and long legs. He would grow up also physically. Sebastian doesn't like girls’ clothes either. There is a line in his mind between little bit make-up play and actually dressing up as a girl.

It’s just his special, own secret when he applies mascara onto his lashes or decorates his eyes with perfect, black lines. It’s also way to cope. Sometimes it takes days, weeks or even months without even looking at locked box in his Dalton wardrobe. But after slushie incident he spends a weekend in the empty house of his parents. It’s relaxing to walk in the house wearing make-up and feeling absolutely nothing.

New captain is eyefucking him in his first rehearsal and blushes deliciously when Sebastian winks at him. There is a pleasant tingle in his stomach when Sebastian notices broad shoulders, open smile and soft-looking hair.

Nobody is like Hunter. Hunter Clarington is pure, raw and almost scary want but also fears, uncertainty and butterfly light kisses. He trembles in Sebastian’s arms, and Hunter can’t know his little secret. He is still learning that boy who loves other boy can be perfectly ordinary, almost boring person. Seeing Sebastian’s make-up box would scare him away in a heartbeat.

His hips are bruised after their first shared night. Hunter presses his mouth on those marks and looks at him with wide, almost scared eyes. “Did I hurt you? Oh my God, I didn’t mean Bastian.” Sebastian just shakes his dark head and pulls Hunter up to press their lips together.

But of course he gets caught. It’s a misunderstanding, Sebastian thought he was alone. It’s absolutely worst moment of his young life, when door is opened and Hunter steps inside. Everything is noticed, shadows of his eyes, blackness of his lashes, and bright shade of turquoise on his nails.

“It’s my favourite colour”, he mumbles stupidly when Hunter doesn't say anything. He walks closer with slow steps and takes Sebastian’s right hand to his own. It’s stupid, romantic gesture when lips touch his fingertips.

"I would prefer green. Green like your eyes.”

Hunter loves him with every kiss, every bite and every thrust. Sebastian is exhausted afterwards and his damned face has to be a mess. But Hunter is looking at him like most precious thing in the whole world. “What is this, Sebastian?” he asks, pure curiosity in his voice.

Sebastian tells.


	31. I'll be your satellite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He thought it was just cheap talking.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from Nickelback's Satellite.
> 
> Past rape, not anything graphic or detailed. Once more one of those texts I can't explain.

Hunter is used to confident Sebastian, who has right words in every situation and ability to soothe all Hunter’s fears. This pale, beautiful creature straight from French nightmare he can’t handle. Lips barely touch his own, there is no passion in Sebastian’s greeting kiss. Hunter would like to be close, it has been too long since their last intimate moment. Winter break had been welcomed family time but now he thinks it would have been better to spend those few weeks with Sebastian, safely at school.

It’s much later than midnight when Sebastian screams like trapped animal waking Hunter up. They had spent last months sleeping in same bed but now Sebastian had wanted his own. It looks like a mistake for Hunter, he would like to just grab Sebastian with him, wrap him in the blankets and fight all fears away but it’s impossible when touching him makes other boy back off.

“Stay there”, Sebastian commands, his voice panting and scared. It’s so surprising that Hunter’s body obeys when his mind is still lost. So he is just kneeling there, waiting for Sebastian to relax. His breathing sounds terribly difficult but somehow Hunter’s boyfriend takes control of his body’s reactions.

Sebastian’s eyes are watery and his fingers squeeze sheets. Hunter doesn't know what to do so he just mutters a question. “Do you need something?” Other boy thinks about it and throws a little smile.

“I need you, babe. But at the same time I don’t want you close.” It hurts him because Sebastian’s voice has new sharp edge. This isn't his Bastian, who had kissed Hunter for goodbye and whispered dirty things in his ear. His parents had waited outside of the room and meeting them with boner had been special kind of torture.

“Can I kiss you?” Sebastian startles but gives his permission. Hunter presses his lips on his boyfriend’s forehead, and then spends night watching Sebastian’s restless sleep. He is exhausted when they have an hour until first class, even Hunter looks much better.

Sebastian develops some kind of affection to Jeff. They had been quite good buddies also earlier but now they are joined by hip. Whenever he sees Jeff’s bright head, somewhere close is also Sebastian. Jeff talks to him, holds Sebastian in their own, little bubble and doesn't reply when Hunter demands answers.

“You know Seb. You know him better than anybody. There is no need to be jealous, I promise that, captain. He is still yours exactly as much as before. Maybe even more. Sebastian just needs time”, Jeff tries to explain eyeing Hunter’s hands critically, he is ready to avoid a hitting fist.

Hunter tries Nick next but result is the same. “Doesn't it bother you that your boyfriend is spending most of his time with other guy? Guy who had a reputation?” he asks but smaller boy just smiles lightly and shakes his head.

“I trust Jeff and you should do same with Sebastian”, Nick’s voice is confident. He isn't careful around Hunter like his prettier half has always been. “If you only knew, you would be ashamed of yourself when you say stuff like that about Sebastian.”

But Hunter doesn't know what’s his boyfriend’s secret and anybody else doesn't seem to see the real problem.

He is losing his fucking mind when Sebastian finally decides that they should have a talk. He still doesn't look normal, there are dark shadows under his eyes and Sebastian’s long, thin fingers are clearly shaky. Too much coffee, decides Hunter. He had talked about that numerous times.

“You can leave after this, Hunter. I wouldn't hold bad feelings against you”, he says quietly and Sebastian’s tone alone would be enough to make him stay. Whatever it is, it’s not about Sebastian doing something bad.

“I had coffee with my old buddy, Jamie, when I was in France. We... we used to hook up, you probably understand. It was nothing serious, just some fun times between good friends. I have known him since we were both in diapers.”

Hunter’s mouth is open because their discussion can’t be taking that path. It’s too bad. He doesn't want to believe that this French boy had destroyed something what was Hunter’s most precious treasure.

“Jamie knew that I have a boyfriend now. I have told it, several times that I wanna be faithful and I wouldn't ever cheat on you.”

“He thought it was just cheap talking.” Sebastian bites his lip too hard and his eyes are once again shining from tears. Hunter is paralyzed and can only wonder if he should get Jeff. Jeff knows how to fix this, with Jeff Sebastian had been almost normal, and being jealous about that had been so childish and stupid. 

"He was always physically stronger. Jamie forced me... He said so horrible things. That I would be always the same, I couldn’t ever change. That I was born to take cock, nothing more.”

“That’s not true. He is a sick bastard. You are beautiful, Sebastian.” Hunter doesn't recognize his voice but he knows one thing for sure. This is different than surviving at military academy or having serious discussions about future with his dad. Now he has to be stronger than ever.

“I’m sorry I couldn't talk to you. You are so pure and I was so proud when I was with you. Now I’m used and dirty and it has just been easier with Jeff.”

Cold flame goes through his body when Hunter thinks about possibility that their innocent, gorgeous, precious Jeff would have experienced something similar. Sebastian guesses right what he is thinking and shakes his head with a light smile on his chapped lips. “It wasn't him. It was a person who is very close to him.”

They are staring at each other. Sebastian makes a gesture to leave but Hunter takes his hand and feels immediately bad when fast movement makes other boy blink furiously. “Sorry, dear. I’m so sorry. For everything you have been forced to suffer.”

Sebastian has difficulties to believe his ears because it doesn't look like Hunter is going. That was one of his reasons to keep his secret so long. Sebastian was selfish, he had had time to get used to Hunter’s natural sweetness and he wasn't ready to let go even though their old easy-going closeness is gone.

He is sick of crying but there is no other way to react when gentle lips touch his hand.


	32. Having no regrets is all that she really wants (1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She would be so sexy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [link](http://whitewinternights7tmcf.tumblr.com/post/109012028230/werewolfzero-soul-mate-au-where-everybody-is)
> 
>  
> 
> Link above goes to Tumblr. I wasn't able to resist that like at all, and results is here. Probably writing more this stuff. Title borrowed from 1D.

Hunter’s face has been like that since he was born. It’s similar like all his friends have, there isn’t anybody who would have already met their soulmate. On the other side his own eye, light blue, totally ordinary, just one little detail in his open and pleasant face. But then there is green one, deep and sparkling with teasing gaze. Eye of his soulmate. When they would meet for the first time, eyes would switch places and then everything would be just about getting to know each other.

She would be so sexy. When Hunter is feeling romantic and bit light-headed, he dreams of that moment when they would see each other. She would have cute freckles and maybe red hair because her eye has so pure shade of green. His parents would find her inappropriate, little bit crazy and maybe not right kind of girl for Hunter but when time would pass, they would learn to love her. She would make Hunter happy.

Of all possible places they meet at Dalton Academy. Hunter is standing in the hallway with his father and dean, he is bored but has glued polite smile on his face. Then his neck starts to itch. Hunter turns around slowly, there is something demanding all his attention.

Three boys are standing behind him. Hunter can sense a bond between two of them, pretty blond and cute dark-haired guy are like pure electricity, bond between them is warmth, sugar and purple colour, but it’s third one who takes his attention so naturally. He is tall and gorgeous, has soft-looking brown hair and his fucking eyes... His magnificent, amazing eyes. When their gazes meet, Hunter feels a sting in his left eye and knows what will happen. Blond boy holds his friend when Hunter’s soulmate looks little upset.

He gets a name. Sebastian. It’s like soft wine on his lips when Hunter whispers that word. He is suddenly shy, unsure what to do. All earlier thoughts about cute redhead are gone because this is it. This is a person for him. Hunter wouldn’t be alone ever.

But then heavy hand touches his shoulder and Hunter remembers all about it how he isn’t even remotely bi-curious. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Like usually, he feels kinda small in presence of his father but now his voice is surprisingly gentle. “Go to meet him, son. He is surely excited to meet you properly.”

So Hunter walks there, he is suddenly in a hurry, eager to really see Sebastian’s face closer once more before everything would be different for them. It’s confusing and amazing, seeing his own eye in the face of this familiar and still so unknown boy is overwhelming. He blinks and then Sebastian’s eyes are just green.

It feels like home when steady arms are wrapped around him. Sebastian’s grip is tight. “I love you, I love you, I love you. You are mine”, other boy is whispering into his ear. Hunter is desperate to be even closer and doesn’t have time to feel embarrassed when Sebastian leads him towards dorm rooms. There would be plenty of time for talking later. Now it’s just raw connection and need to establish it properly.


	33. Screamer (2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Aww, don’t be shy. It was super hot. So sexy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I'll call this heterochromia-series so I don't have to link other parts every time. All parts in my Huntbastian-collection with little number after the title belong to this series.

Sebastian's skin has taste of salt under his tongue. Green eyes are almost black from uncontrolled lust. His teeth leave a mark on shoulder when rough question is asked. “Do you want this?” Hunter just nods. It’s possible that he had saved this moment for his soulmate but when he watches how naturally Sebastian moves, it’s clear that he hasn’t done the same. There is a ghost of longing but it’s gone soon enough when Sebastian decides to blow him. Wet heat of his mouth is almost too much to handle. 

Sebastian presses his palm on Hunter’s sweaty chest and smiles widely at his rapidly beating heart. He tries to get up but Sebastian pushes him back. “Stay there.” It’s enjoyable to watch his flexible body moving when other boy goes to bathroom and returns with wet towel.

His  hands are gentle on Hunter’s body when marks of his orgasm are cleaned. After towel is taken back to bathroom, Sebastian snuggles against his side like it would be most natural thing in the world. He is self-conscious but relaxes little by little. This is not big thing after getting fucked by this boy.

“You are pretty, screamer.” He can hear Sebastian’s natural smirk and Hunter surely has pink roses on his warm cheeks. This wouldn’t do good to his reputation as a new captain of the Warblers.

“Aww, don’t be shy. It was super hot. So sexy.”

“Do you have... Do you have lots of experience then?” Hunter asks quietly and he can sense Sebastian thinking. Fingers touch his lips briefly and curious mouth kisses his neck. Sebastian has still energy to give his affection to Hunter.

“I wasn’t saving myself for you, screamer.” Oh God, they should really talk about appropriate pet names. “And I’m still kinda free spirit. I'm yours now, it's that simple but there are some things you have to learn to live with. I didn't plan to become similar sappy person like Nick and Jeff. Meeting your soulmate in high school. Damn, screamer.”

It would be so easy to forget other world and just cuddle there with his gloriously naked soulmate. He likes Sebastian’s lean body and it’s possible to see admiration in his green eyes when Sebastian studies Hunter’s stomach and chest. He hasn’t ever been more thankful for all those hours at gym.

Hunter could spend whole evening just listening to Sebastian’s lazy stories about himself but he has always been a responsible son and it’s a fact that his father knows what had happened as embarrassing it is. Hunter tries to get up but there is strong hand holding him.

“Where do you think you are going?” Sebastian asks low purr in his voice.

“I have to get back to my father. I was just listening to some praising about it how I’ll lead Warblers to new glory when you kinda interrupted whole thing.” Grin on Sebastian’s face is almost innocent.

“Well. In that case you are about to steal my show choir, so you owe me a kiss. Several kisses. And seriously, screamer. Your father isn’t waiting for you back very soon. Stay with me.”

Maybe it’s just their bond affecting but Hunter could swear Sebastian’s kisses taste apple and cinnamon. He reminds himself to ask later if other boy would like to be his co-captain. 


	34. Ten feet tall and fucking bulletproof

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He imagines removed eye and just white bandage covering damage."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe 1,5 months ago I saw a movie called Never Let Me Go. I didn't really like it but it has been kinda haunting me, so that's why I wrote this AU-fic. Here is a [link](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Never_Let_Me_Go_%282010_film%29) to Wikipedia if you haven't seen that movie and you want to read about it. 
> 
> Title borrowed from Nickelback.

Sebastian isn’t excited about new job of his mom. She is a principal in the school for very special kids. Those kids would become organ donors, they would save dozens of lives with their gifts. He is quiet when he is listening to his mom telling about it. Sebastian doesn’t like it how his mom sounds, it’s not as exciting as she thinks. When he sees those kids, they look perfectly ordinary, boys are playing with ball and girls talk about horses too much. He can sense jealous eyes studying his back, when Sebastian takes his brown pony out and lets him gallop on the field.

He knows they think he is arrogant when anybody doesn’t get a permission to touch Snowball. Sebastian just wants to stay distant. He knows more than most of those kids and if he can save few carefree days, it’s worth it.

He doesn’t think about them too much before he meets Hunter C. Sebastian is sixteen, young and strong. Serious Hunter is as old as he. Sebastian had already learned that he likes guys but he hadn’t imagined that a boy like Hunter would make him interested. They meet at Sebastian’s private stable. Hunter is nervous. He didn’t mean to stalk or come to forbidden place but Sebastian doesn’t really care. Even though his life is kinda enjoyable, his private lessons are going fine and he loves music with his whole heart - Sebastian shines during singing lessons and isn’t bad with piano either - it’s exciting and new to talk with somebody who is same age with him.

Carolyn Smythe had mentioned sending him to private school to get better teaching but after meeting Hunter it’s an impossible idea.

Eyes of Hunter are just bit paler than beautiful sky above them. They say that donors don’t have soul but nobody has as beautiful soul as Hunter, thinks Sebastian. He is hesitant at first, doesn’t want to cause any trouble for Sebastian but it’s easy to get Hunter calmer. Teachers don’t care if Sebastian steals Hunter’s time, his learning isn’t important anyway. Carolyn Smythe is fine with them spending time together as long as Sebastian doesn’t get “too attached”. 

He brings books to Hunter. He loves Harry Potter and adores Sebastian’s tourist guides for Paris. Blue eyes are in awe when Sebastian tells in French how beautiful and amazing he is. Fragile, beautiful dream is painted in front of their eyes when he describes Paris and all the things they could do there together. “I would cover you in kisses. You would taste strawberries and ice cream, gorgeous.” Hunter almost giggles and Sebastian kisses his pink cheeks.

Their days are numbered. On one quiet morning Hunter wakes Sebastian up with tentative kiss. “I want you to touch me. I want to feel you inside me.” It’s clumsy. Hunter’s skin is cold against his hands and Sebastian doesn’t really know what he is doing when he guides other boy. In the end Hunter rides him, determination and physical pain visibly on his face.

“Do you visit me?” Hunter asks afterwards. He is warm and living beside Sebastian and he can’t believe he had just made love to dying boy. “Visit where?” Sebastian wants to know. His brain feels slow and that’s why he doesn’t understand what Hunter is talking about.

“When they’ll take me to start donations. Maybe I can get few free days and you can take me to beach. Of course only if you want. I understand that this is just temporary thing. Life is waiting for you.”

“Of course I’ll come. You will get best I can organize. Apples and oranges to make you stronger. Books and music and private rooms.” It’s heartbreaking and so stupid to talk about things like that. Sebastian wants to forget it. All he really wants is to lie there with his beautiful, precious lover and forget cruel world. It’s quiet and peaceful, rain is drumming the roof and yellow light in his room gives an illusion of safety.

“What are they taking first?” His voice is small and Sebastian hates to think about that. He knows. Of course he knows. Sebastian has heard enough conversations in their house and read lots of books of his mom secretly. “It could be blood. Lots of blood. Or maybe an eye. They won’t take anything really important as a first donation, your body is strong and they want to keep it that way as long as possible.”

Sebastian hides his face in Hunter’s neck. Hunter is real, breathing and loving human being, more real than any of those people who have stolen a right to decide about his life and death. He imagines removed eye and just white bandage covering damage. They wouldn’t know anything about Hunter. They wouldn’t care about it how Hunter had wanted to learn French words, how he had been first one to mumble shy I love you. They wouldn’t know that his favourite character in Harry Potter is Neville. Nobody would care that his first zombie movie ever had made Hunter laugh so heartily. For those people Hunter would be just source of resources, nothing more.

Fake bravery of Hunter’s eyes is in his mind when Sebastian is sharing a breakfast with his mom. He tries to find right words to convince here but can’t do it, when Carolyn mentions the fact that there isn’t much time left before Hunter’s eighteenth birthday

“I hope you still remember rules, Sebastian”, she says and takes a sip of her coffee. Sebastian stares at his mother’s black nail polish and knows how futile try it would be. Only result would be beating for him, that wouldn’t help Hunter at all.

“Of course. He is just fun guy, nothing more.” He is an expert at lying.

Last thing he can give to Hunter is his horse. Other boy is bit worried but he is natural athlete, riding isn’t anything too difficult for him. Old Snowball is watching when Hunter leads Storyteller, Sebastian’s gorgeous, black mare. It’s impossible to do anything except laugh with Hunter. Horse’s movements and his own talent make him simply happy.

Phone call to his aunt in Paris is last desperate try to save life of his lover. Sebastian has to wait twenty minutes before doing the call. He doesn’t want to cry. “They can’t be right”, he explains in shaking voice. “He isn’t soulless, he is so loving, just ordinary boy who shouldn’t die. Hunter deserves a change, just like everyone else. Please”, he begs. Sebastian is ready to kneel and kiss anybody’s shoes to make it happen.

Aunt Marie is quiet for a moment. “I never understood why my sister moved to that brutal country. What they are doing to those children is disgusting and sick. I can’t promise anything, Sebastian but I’m trying. I have some important friends, maybe I can pull Hunter out.”

Hunter is already holding his first envelope when that phone call arrives. Lots of money has been payed, aunt Marie has bribed god knows how many important men and women. They want Hunter out of country, he couldn’t ever come back. Other boy tries to smile when Sebastian comes downstairs. “It doesn’t matter, Seb. It’s okay. I’ll be okay.” He is Sebastian’s ridiculously brave, little soldier and Sebastian loves him more than anything.

“Get rid of it, gorgeous. We are going to Paris.”

(When they leave next morning, Sebastian has a black eye but he doesn’t care about that.)


	35. Father (3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part three in heterochromia series.

Hunter is staring at his reflection and trying to find a smile which wouldn’t be too relaxed. Everybody wouldn’t need to think immediately how he had gotten laid.

“You look handsome in the blazer”, Sebastian tells. He is standing at the door of bathroom and Hunter meets his sparkling eyes in the mirror. It’s already possible to tell that heart eyes and sweet words would be private things. In private he would be like a prince in Sebastian’s arms. In public there would be teasing comments and names like arm candy.

Sebastian walks behind him and his hands are warm and heavy on Hunter’s shoulders. “You are nervous. Do you really think your father doesn’t like us… Doesn’t like me?” Insecure shadow in Sebastian’s voice makes Hunter’s heart ache. Basically Sebastian is everything Hunter imagined his soulmate would be. Except he isn’t a girl.

Hunter has always thought his big and scary military father wouldn’t approve anything like this but yeah, he had been kind when Hunter had left with this boy and forgotten all his responsibilities for a moment. “I’m not sure. I hope they will be okay.”

“I’ll fight for you if it’s needed. You are mine. They can’t keep me away.” Sebastian hugs him gently and gives a kiss on his cheek. Hunter loves his confidence, his simple trust that they would be okay in the end.

They walk to cafeteria together and when they pass dorm rooms and classes, Hunter doesn’t see a single boy who would have two similar eyes. Brown and green shade of forest. Blue and gray. Dark blue and light blue, sometimes it’s hard to spot a difference but it’s always there. No other people who would have already met their soulmate. 

He gets another kiss outside of the cafeteria. It’s chaste one, just a short press on his temple. Smile warms Hunter’s heart when his soulmate goes. Sebastian grabs a yoghurt and takes a seat at the table with group of boys. They are probably the Warblers or at least mos of them, but Hunter would deal with them later. Hunter sees his father at the corner table, newspaper and coffee in front of him, and some sandwiches on the other side of the table. He takes a deep breath and goes. He would still have Sebastian, no matter what.

Bill Clarington smiles immediately, when he spots his younger son. “Stop that, Hunter. You look like you are going to your execution.”

Can he really be blamed? Hunter sits down anyway. Sandwiches of the cafeteria look good but he isn’t really hungry. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry about what?”

“About Sebastian. I know it’s not exactly appropriate…” Hunter tries to explain. He is so worried that crying isn’t far. Hunter hasn’t cried since he was six years old and broke his left arm.

“Yes, about Sebastian I wanted to talk. Your mother wants to know if you can visit us before Christmas. I’ll contact your brother and ask if he can come too.”

Hunter’s mouth is open and it has to look stupid. He didn’t know what to wait from his father but this definitely isn’t the result he had in his head. “But… He is a boy.”

“I know that, son. I know it really well. But that look on his face, when he saw you for the first time. Do you really think it would be possible to keep him away from you now? Don’t you have better idea of your parents? We wouldn’t ever hurt you like that.”

“And I’m not yet that old. I still remember how it felt to meet Diane. She was most beautiful little creature I had ever seen and she still is. You were lucky to meet Sebastian so early. It’s not going to be easy but it’s worth it because he is your other half.”

 

 

He feels lighter, almost weightless.


	36. You know I wanna be the one to hold you when you sleep (4)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Smythe’s soulmate? Let me laugh.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part four in heterochromia series.  
> I borrowed title from One Direction. 
> 
> I have my fucking bachelor's thesis presentation tomorrow and I haven't literally ever been this nervous. So I'm trying to handle it by writing.

Of course they are curious. Every boy who looks into his eyes, startles and makes a question or two. “Who is it? Is there a girl back home”? They are excited, looks like they are almost happy for him. Hunter feels proud exactly until that moment when name of his soulmate is mentioned. Some of the boys are nicer. They look just suspicious and give their dismissive comments.

 

“Smythe’s soulmate? Let me laugh.”

“Smythe doesn’t do boyfriends.”

“Good luck with him.”

“You could have gotten better.”

 

Usually Hunter would react faster. They are commenting something what is already so precious and fragile for him, but now those words make him numb. He has seen situations where others have met their soulmates, and people have been just happy, celebrating like it would have been their own happiness. He doesn’t understand why their voices are so bitter and sharp.

 

But worst is still coming. There are other boys, even meaner ones who use those horrible names of Sebastian.

“Smythe doesn’t know what being faithful is. He is ready to spread his legs to anybody.”

“He is just a slut.”

“Are you really ready to share your soulmate?”

 

Afterwards Hunter doesn’t understand why he didn’t say anything. He was just sitting there, listening how they insulted his other half, his boyfriend, his soulmate, his everything. It’s clear that Sebastian hadn’t kept his thighs together like very many people do when they are still waiting. But it doesn’t make him less valuable.

Then last class is finally over. Hunter would have exactly 55 minutes before his first rehearsal with the Warblers. When he goes to their room, Sebastian is already there. He has sliced fruits on a small plate and poured ice-cold water in the glass. Bond had probably told him how stressed Hunter had been for whole day. There is a scent of toothpaste in the air when lips touch his cheek.

“Did you have a hard day, gorgeous?” Sebastian asks before offering snacks. Both of them sit down, fruit plate still in Sebastian’s hand. Hunter looks at him. Other boy is relaxed and casual, thin fingers brush his thigh and Sebastian offers impossibly charming smile.

That smile dies when Hunter tells what bothers him. “They called you slut. They said so horrible things about you.” Suddenly body next to him is tense, Hunter runs his fingers on Sebastian’s thigh, feeling all hard muscles.

“It has been just few days. I would have wanted to stay in that bliss a little longer”, he tells quietly. “Hunter, I have probably slept with every even slightly bi-curious guy around. If that is too big problem for you, I guess we can organize something. I know you were waiting for all that first time fumbling, blushing and giggling, and I’m sorry I couldn’t give it. But I can’t become almost virgin for you, it’s impossible.”

Possessiveness is boiling in his veins when Hunter sees those unwanted images in front of his eyes. But Hunter didn’t mean that, it’s not like Sebastian imagines it is.

“It was then. Now is now. It’s just... I guess I was upset, like how were they able to say those horrible, ugly things?” Hunter’s gentleness makes Sebastian surprised. There are people in his corner yes, and Warbler are still his friends no matter how bumpy their road has been, but Hunter’s approval is still something different, something which makes Sebastian feels prouder of himself than for a long time. He is worth this.

“It’s you and me, babe”, Hunter promises. Sebastian doesn’t believe in fairytales but he could believe in this boy who has big heart, and little smile on his lips. 


	37. There's no more rabbits in my hat to make things right

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess original inspiration behind this was one of Riker Lynch's IG-photos where he looked super pretty in the sunshine. I also kinda miss summer, winter has been here too long. Of course there was also [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZ8j-OK0nuI) song and if you are interested, you can check lyrics in English [here](http://lyrics-translations.com/song/show/4051536/kaija-koo/lyrics-and-translation-ajoin-koko-yn/). Title is borrowed from Sunrise Avenue.

He is beautiful, Nick thinks. It’s first time for too many years when he sees Jeff but that fact hasn’t changed. Jeff is shirtless and enjoys endless sunshine like a big, blond cat. His body looks totally relaxed and comfortable, he was already attractive in high school but now he has muscles in places that used to be much more boyish.

Nick still remembers how soft his skin was against his fingertips. They were shy boys, really touching each other just in their dark dorm room. On daytime they held hands or exchanged quick pecks, and much more confident Hunter and Sebastian used to laugh at them. Suddenly wave of emotions hits him, all of that feels like it would have been a lifetime ago, even though all of them are still young, there is so much life in front of them.

He has spent months looking for Jeff. His closest relatives weren’t helpful at all and Nick really understands them. Jeff had been hurt after graduation because of his stupid actions, so of course second change for Nick didn’t sound like a good idea in their ears. Then he tried some of their high school buddies and got tiny tip there and other one here. Looks like Jeff’s life has been really moving.

But now he is there, lying on his towel and he is real, not just some distant dream. Just few feet separate them but taking those last steps feels impossible. Jeff could do literally anything and most of it would probably give Nick a black eye.

Suddenly Jeff gets up, stretching that gorgeous body and his brown eyes meet Nick’s. Nick feels silly in his dark jeans and t-shirt, it isn’t best choice for this sunny beach. If it was possible to kill with single gaze, Nick wouldn’t have a change, but after few confused moments Jeff tries to find a neutral look on his face.

“Duval”, he says and that’s like a cold splash against his face. It fucking hurts. Jeff takes his towel, books, and water bottle looking like he is ready to go, but then Nick’s fingers wrap around his wrist. Blond looks at their hands and spits his question.

“How the hell you found me?”

“It wasn’t easy.” His tight grip seems to make Jeff uncomfortable, and Nick doesn’t want to know how other people around them see the situation, so he lets go.

“I traveled across the country just to find you.”

“I didn’t ask you to do it. I owe you nothing.” Jeff covers his body with dark blue tank top and just before bare skin disappears, Nick notices tattoos. A horse shoe, a wolf, and few words in decorative cursive. There is one more picture on his shoulder, showing Jeff’s love for California. He hadn’t been especially interested in beaches in high school but it’s true that Nick doesn’t know a thing about this new, older Jeff.

His tongue is pierced. Even idea of piercings would have made that old, innocent Jeff faint.

“I guess we can have a drink”, Jeff suggests, clear hesitation in his voice. “But you are paying if you want me to waste my time with you.”

Small coffee shop is surprisingly quiet. Nick pays their orders like Jeff demanded. Meanwhile blond has conquered a window table, and placed his bag on one of the chairs, so Nick can’t sit next to him. It’s nostalgic to sit with Jeff like that, but that’s everything. Other young man is clearly nervous, doesn’t like situation at all.

“So, how life has been?”

“You come here after all this time, and you are asking how my life has been. Fuck you Nicholas Duval. Fuck you. You broke me. You don’t understand how it felt to wake up in an empty bed. I thought we had whole life together ahead of us, but you threw all of it away. It wasn’t even about not loving me anymore, it was about you wanting to look like a straight in front of your parents.”

Nick can’t help keeping an eye on Jeff’s left hand. He could get liquid right to his face, and that’s one straight from a movie - experience he wouldn’t like to have. “I’m sorry”, he mumbles. That’s everything he can try, Nick doesn’t really have good explanation for his actions. Leaving Jeff alone to his bed few days after their graduation had broken his heart, but it had felt wisest thing to do. Jeff could find better boyfriend, he had thought. Someone who would be braver and would be with Jeff without any hesitation.

Face of blond is bit softer. “I would lie if I said I haven’t thought how you are doing. You are an asshole and I don’t trust you, but we had good times. And your question. Pretty well, I guess. I work as a lifeguard and take classes whenever I feel like that. Sebastian doesn’t live far, so I spend most of my free time with him.”

“How about Hunter? Is he abroad?” Nick doesn’t guess what would be the result of his simple questions.

“Nicholas. Hunter is dead. I sent you an invitation to the funeral but I guess you didn’t get it.” Jeff’s eyes follow life outside of the place, giving him time to deal with surprising news. Nick remembers their victorious, proud captain. Hunter had kissed Sebastian before accepting their shiny, beautiful trophy. He had bought a ring, asked maybe, possibly, perhaps and Sebastian had been so confused that he had slipped to answer in French.

“It was just a month after their wedding. It was fucking fairytale wedding, cloudless sky, white roses, Hunter... Hunter was more handsome than ever, he started to cry when he saw Sebastian. Perfect, match made in heaven. I used to think same about us. But yeah, they didn’t have much time. Two weeks on paradise island. After that Hunter left and Sebastian returned their home. Sebastian hadn’t even given souvenirs when they brought that message. Sebastian lost it. If it hadn’t been so horrible situation, it would have been hilarious how he managed to punch one of Hunter’s army buddies.”

There is a lump in his throat. Nick doesn’t know why he hadn’t gotten invitation to his e-mail. But he would have wanted to be there and witness last journey of an old friend. Their high school four-leaf clover is gone and Nick hadn’t known about it.

“How is Sebastian?” he asks and Jeff shrugs.

“We are fucking. He isn't my boyfriend or anything, it's just casual time together. He is a fighter, has always been. He has better days and worse days but mostly he remembers to eat and go to his classes and work. After the funeral we got drunk and got these tattoos.” It’s a little picture of airplane on his ankle.

Nick senses how Jeff isn’t totally with him, his mind is wandering in other things, and sooner or later he would thank for this awkward meeting and leave. So that’s why he blurts out that question.

“Can I meet him?”

“Meet Sebastian? I guess so, but I have to ask him.”

It’s not perfect. They aren’t boys anymore and there are so many negative feelings between them, but right now only thing Nick wants is to give his condolences to Sebastian and hug him.


	38. Let's lock the door behind us, they won't find us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeff’s kiss is hungry and needy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, well, well. This is basically something like "other half" of previous fic. Number 36 works also alone, but this is pretty impossible to understand without it. Title borrowed from Nickelback.

Sebastian used to be fast. He woke up early, at the same time with birds. After that day he is born again. At first Sebastian is slow, he can sleep twelve hours every night and wouldn’t wake up without his stubborn friend. But Jeff is always there. He kisses Sebastian’s head, offering coffee. Then there is a breakfast, daily fight. Toast, fruits, orange juice, eggs. He has stopped being hungry, it just doesn’t happen. But somehow Jeff tricks him to eat just a bit at first, then bit more.

At least after eating Sebastian would like to go back to bed but no no, Jeff doesn’t give a permission to that. “It’s such a nice day”, he comments even though it would be a fucking thunderstorm. Sebastian is dragged out, every day they walk at least an hour, sometimes even two, and okay, he has to admit that it isn’t totally horrible. Rainy air smells so good and Jeff’s babbling is comforting, he is like a child when he manages to find something interesting every few minutes. They stop to pet tiny chihuahua whose fur is softest thing Sebastian has felt for a long time. Then there is a shower of rain and they run to nearest grocery store. Jeff laughs against his face and Sebastian forgets for a moment what had happened. On that moment they are again carefree boys.

For a moment he thinks surviving could be possible. Then nightmares arrive. His own screams force him to wake up, sleeping isn’t anymore a synonym for safety and rest. Sebastian is shaking, his imagination is creating so horrible pictures of slowly dying Hunter, even though Sebastian knows it had been fast.

He has no other choice. Jeff’s voice is sleepy but gentle when he pick ups the call. “I’ll be there, sweetie. 30 minutes.” Sebastian waits him in the corner of living room. There he can’t see that bed where Hunter had made love to him. Some meaningless episode of CSI: NY is running. At first he had been suspicious, after all whole show is full of death and bodies, but somehow it calms him. CSI: NY works with it’s own logic, same things over and over again, it’s easy to forget himself in that world.

Jeff brings a suitcase with him. Clothes, books, and his toothbrush. Sebastian stares at it with wide eyes, but his friend just shrugs. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere”, he promises in low voice. Hunter said same, Sebastian would like to argue. They sit down, Jeff leans his head against Sebastian’s shoulder and says something about it how Gary Sinise would be so handsome if he only was twenty years younger.

Sleeping doesn’t get much better with him. Sebastian’s rest isn’t rest, he is sweaty and nervous, when he wakes up and Jeff’s eyes are more and more worried. Then Jeff suggests sharing his bed. It’s awkward at first, they aren’t used to that kind of closeness, but both of them manage to find a comfortable position. Jeff whispers his good night in his hair and it’s possible to fall as sleep, when there are safe arms holding him.

Few weeks later he is just a walking ghost. Sebastian has always drunk almost too much coffee but now it’s getting just ridiculous. Nothing feels real, his tired brain can’t handle anything more complicated information than weather forecast. Jeff stops listening to him. Motherly-looking older doctor doesn’t hesitate when she hears what Sebastian has experienced. Bed isn’t anymore scariest place of his life. Those little pills give empty rest.

It’s of course Jeff, who buys Tiger. He is black chihuahua puppy, tiny but independent and fearless. Small dog licks Jeff’s cheek, and eyes of his friend are pleading. “Please, sweetie. You need a reason to get up every morning.” He can’t say no. Sebastian just hopes Jeff doesn’t realize what kind of power he could have over him.

They start to talk about moving to west. “I don’t wanna be here”, Jeff mumbles lazily. He rolls over looking so much like an elegant cat. “What do you say, sweetie? New people, new place, new life? What keeps us here?” Almost nothing. It’s most spontaneous thing he has ever done, but he follows Jeff. Jeff, who is excited about sun and tattoos and people and silly bracelets.

Sebastian’s new bedroom has blue walls. It’s calming to be there and especially Jeff makes it his favourite room. They are sitting in front of window and watching magical-looking sunset, when he kisses his best friend for the first time. It’s fastest kiss ever, just a little touch on his cheek.

Jeff’s fingers find that spot and he turns to look at Sebastian. He is about to apologize but then their lips are smashed together. Jeff’s kiss is hungry and needy. He is inexperienced and clumsy and eager, but so so so beautiful. With Hunter it was often rushed, even bit rough, and afterwards swollen lips were kissing bare skin sleepily. But with Jeff Sebastian takes his time, and in the end blond is just moaning, begging mess. His eyes are teary when they become one.

“I don’t...” Sebastian starts when they are again able to talk. Jeff throws him carefree smile. “I’m not asking eternal love, sweetie.”

It becomes beautiful dance. Jeff doesn’t ask promises or words of love. They are just behaving like a steady couple without actually being one. Sometimes they spend days meeting other people and spending time in different places but they always end up together. Jeff arrives to Sebastian’s place bringing food with him, or Sebastian calls and asks if they could see a movie together.

In new city Sebastian starts running again. He wakes up with sun and leaves his footprints on wet sand. He laughs more and spoils Jeff with his excellent homemade meals. Most of Hunter’s things are in their old apartment, but photos are hidden in one of his cardboard boxes. On one night Sebastian finds them. His cheeks are wet, when he looks at their wedding photo, but there is new kind of peace in his heart. “I’m okay, captain.” Sebastian wouldn’t forget his first love.

Jeff smiles, when he sees three photos in the bookshelf.

There isn’t any kind of jealousy between them, even though their whole thing is totally casual. Jealousy arrives at the same with Nicholas Duval. Jeff is hesitant but his eyes are glossy. Sebastian knows he is thinking about boyfriends, old times, and all kind of things he hasn’t gotten from Sebastian. But Nick doesn’t have a change. Around him Jeff is careful, doesn’t show all his new sides. They spend few evenings together, sipping wine and talking about almost all their shared memories. It’s good. They don’t mention dead relationship or Hunter, but it’s still good. Everything is clear and Sebastian doesn’t feel like crying, when Nicholas remembers to give his condolences. “I’m so sorry.” Sebastian just nods. He has heard those words so many times.

When Nick has finally left, Sebastian takes Jeff. He obeys, whispers husky words, and falls to bed without fear or worries. Afterwards, when Jeff sits up, his movements are tentative and whimper escapes from his mouth. Sebastian had been possessive.

“I want to be with you”, he whispers. “Just you and me. Like it has been. I want to try, I want to try to be whole again.” He is afraid of that vulnerability his words reveal, but Jeff’s brown eyes are full of trust and love.

“It’s okay, sweetie. I was waiting for you and I would have waited more.”


	39. (I miss you, so, so, I do)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He will be back, sweetie. It’s okay, you have us now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hm... At first I was wandering through all kind of Niff-fanfiction. Then I happened to write some kind of Niffbastian.  
> I borrowed title from Nickelback.

They would have a weekend. Jeff feels almost guilty when he leans against his boyfriend’s shoulder. He and Nick have still each other, they are okay, nothing is threatening them, but at the same time their friends’ world is crashing down. Dark-haired boy can sense how tense Jeff is and squeezes his knee gently.

“His father is coming on Monday, they are taking Hunter away and I can do absolutely nothing", Sebastian tells, his eyes red and voice shaky. It’s horrible to see his condition. Sebastian can be a top class asshole, everybody admits that, but it’s not right how he is losing everything after having so fragile happiness with Hunter.

Jeff leaves his place beside Nick and gives a light kiss to Sebastian’s cheek. They are friends, good friends. Sebastian doesn’t really let many people near himself but Jeff knows his hug is welcomed. They stand close each other for several minutes before he gives Sebastian a gentle shove. “Go to your man.” In the same situation he would want to spend every remaining minute together.

His sigh is heavy when Sebastian is gone. “I wanna do something for them. Something to show that we care.”

It’s not much. Boys know that Sebastian and Hunter’s dorm room is stripped bare and depressing, because Hunter’s stuff is packed in cardboard boxes, so maybe they would like to spend their last evening and night in Nick and Jeff’s room which is anyway bigger. They prepare a basket of food, all kind of things suitable for a picnic. There are blankets and pillows on their beds that are pushed together. It’s very cute and comfortable love nest.

In normal situation Jeff wouldn’t dare to offer it. Hunter and Sebastian aren’t that kind of guys who like cute things but now there is a little smile on Sebastian’s tired face. He is shower fresh and looks young in his grey t-shirt even though hickeys are covering his neck. He sits down to examine picnic basket and seems to forget whole situation for a moment. Hunter pulls Jeff's sleeve. His eyes are soft when he looks at Sebastian but it's clear that other boy's mind is working more practical way.

“Can I have a minute with you?” Hunter asks quietly. He is again that serious and lifeless guy who first came to Dalton. Hunter’s body and mind seem to be under steely will. It's kinda sad to see. Hunter had made a mistake but with the Warblers he had learned to laugh like a boy who he is. They have lots of good memories, small Friday parties with six people in some dorm room, movie nights, and Saturday afternoons at closest mall. The Warblers may look fancy and formal but they are just a group of ordinary teenagers boys. Their whole world had been new kind of experience for this boy, their loved captain. 

 "Sure”, Jeff replies, confused but ready to anything what Hunter could possibly ask. He follows other boy of the room and behind closest corner.

“Can I ask you two to take care of him? Sebastian isn’t feeling really well right now, he needs somebody and I can’t be that somebody.”

“Of course. He is our best friend.” It's an easy promise. Jeff understands Hunter's concern and he would do it anyway. 

“You know. Whatever it takes to keep him happy as long as you are both comfortable with it. Anything. I just want Sebastian to cope because I’m going to be back.” Hunter pronounces those words carefully and his darkened eyes don't leave Jeff's. 

Jeff’s cheeks are suddenly horribly hot when he understands what Hunter has to be implying. Other boy gives his approval for physical closeness, for things that have been happening just between Hunter and Sebastian during last months.

“Sure. But you... How are you going to do it?”

“I have played this game against my father for my whole life. I know all rules and ways to cheat. There is no need to be worried about me. It’s Sebastian who is in weaker position.”

Of course Jeff gives his word, he couldn't let Hunter leave without it.

Morning is merciless, and suddenly clock shows that there is just sixty minutes left, not more than one hour. The Warblers have formed a protective circuit around them.  Sebastian is crying quietly, arm around Hunter’s neck and face hidden. Hunter strokes his back soothingly. “It’s going to be okay, beautiful. I hate to see you cry.” But then happens something what makes even Sebastian smile. It's simple thing, Hunter pulls his phone out of his pocket.

“Do you want this? My father is going to break it otherwise.” It looks like an ordinary iPhone but Jeff knows why that phone is special. Sebastian bought it to Hunter. It was ridiculously expensive gift but Sebastian was determined when he said it caused headache to see Hunter's old, almost ancient phone. “It’s full of hot pictures of you”, Hunter tells and makes Sebastian laugh. He is beautiful on that moment even with his wet face.

Sebastian looks exhausted when Hunter is gone. Then he turns around and rushes away. Jeff follows determinedly, and he arrives there just in time to see how bathroom door is slammed shut. 

“Seb? Sweetie?” he asks softly and steps inside when there is no answer. Sebastian is staring at his reflection. Slowly he washes his face and pats his eyes with wet paper towel.

“I will come. I’m going to take care of everything. I just needed a fucking moment. I wasn’t planning to cut or anything like that. It’s not that bad, Jeff. Every breath and memory hurts, but I’m still here.”

He moves like an obedient doll. Luckily Jeff shares most of Sebastian’s Monday classes, he isn’t sure if his friend could handle all of it alone. He writes notes like a machine and doesn’t talk to anybody. In the afternoon, right before practice with the Warblers he seems to be bit more lively. Getting captaincy back isn’t bad for Sebastian’s ego and singing takes his thoughts away from bittersweet aspects of his life. It has been a while since working under Sebastian's command but his style is familiar and soon enough they are going through a choreography beautifully.

At dinner Jeff has a change to talk with Nick alone. “Hunter asked us to take care of him.” Nick plays with his pasta looking thoughtful. He eats a bit before saying anything.

“Yeah. I was thinking it when I heard Hunter would go. There is enough space for third bed in our room. He surely gives us some private time too. Sebastian has nobody else left, he needs us.”

Their suggestion is honest but Jeff is still waiting for some kind of hesitation from their friend. Sebastian is tough and super proud but now there is child’s gratitude in his eyes.

He doesn’t look so sure anymore when third bed is pulled into room and they see how small it looks. Jeff tries to say something light. “It’s cosy, I think.” All of them know friendship wouldn't be enough to prevent problems of limited living space. It would cause bitchy comments and murderous gazes but they would be good enough to go through all of if together. 

It happens few weeks later. Jeff is the one to start it. He kisses Sebastian clumsily, it’s so different to touch his lanky body. Nick isn’t chubby in any way but he is nice to hug, soft, and sometimes hesitant in bed. Jeff knows that makes Nick nervous when he is thinking about three boys and what could happen between them. Sebastian is all confident when he pulls Nick into his arms. “Come here pretty boy, I wanna taste you too.” That makes Nick flustered, his cheeks have a pale shade of pink when he kisses Sebastian. It’s weird to watch them together. Weird but hot.  In the end they are lying together like a pile of kittens. When Jeff kisses Sebastian’s cheek, it’s wet from tears. “I miss him so much. Finally I had someone who understood. He got my back, no matter what happened and then they just took him. It can’t be fair.” Nick kisses his neck and Jeff strokes Sebastian’s hip.

“He will be back, sweetie. It’s okay, you have us now.”

They get to know each other in bed. It gets better and easier, it’s not weird anymore to have too many legs and arms around him. They move together beautifully, it’s almost graceful. Jeff sees stars when Sebastian blows him, and after that there is Nick who offers his closeness, gentle lips against his own and fingers to comb his sweaty hair.

It's Saturday night when Jeff is suddenly awake. There isn't as much warmth around him as usually. Nick sleeps, face buried in the pillow but Sebastian has left the bed. He is sitting at the window and doesn't turn his head even though he notices Jeff covering his upper body with somebody's Dalton-sweater. "What's wrong, sweetie?" he asks when he is standing behind Sebastian. Touch on his neck makes other boy shiver.

"Did he ask it? I mean whole being casually together-thing and threesomes."

"At least it was a strong implication. He didn't want you to be alone." Sebastian turns around and gives him a deep kiss, different than his usual carefree and passionate ones. This one is full of emotion and Jeff is pretty sure he knows what Sebastian tries to tell. It's wordless thanks.  

Some weekends Sebastian spends with his sister and Jeff always makes sure that Nick feels loved and beautiful and desired. He asks it just once. “This is a temporary thing, right? You aren’t really into having two boyfriends, are you?” Jeff shows with his body what’s an answer to that question.

Their graduation day is sunny. There is a group of boys in the yard of school building, they are talking about summer, upcoming years and school reunions like it would have been five years, not half an hour. Then Jeff spots him. His hair is shorter than last time but besides that he looks exactly same and is as handsome as always. He comes to Jeff with a huge grin on his face.

“How is Sebastian?” he asks softly and Jeff smiles. “Good but I guess he’ll be so much better.”

“He isn’t... There isn’t a boy...”

“No. He has same opinion as you had. Your thing isn’t finished.”

Sebastian is usually icy and cool. He doesn’t get excited about things. But seeing Hunter makes him run across the yard and fly into his arms. “I promised baby”, Jeff can hear Hunter muttering.

“I still have your phone”, Sebastian replies shakily. Overwhelming emotions make him almost breathless. “But it’s getting ridiculously old. I will buy a new one.” Hunter’s laugh is low and loving.


	40. No, we won't give up, we won't go away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We didn’t have sex, right?” Not any weird and kinky threesome?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Klaine makes me cringe so I can't stand even idea of their wedding. I'm not biggest fan of Kurtbastian either, so I didn't take that path. The wedding in my fic isn't exactly same as in the canon. Very much Kurt-friendly fic. 
> 
> Title from Nickelback.

Hummel sleeps like a baby under thick covers. He changes position and curls up into a tight ball in his sleep. Only his chestnut brown hair is visible. Maybe happenings of previous day had taken lots of stress away from Hummel but even his rest is still somehow tense. Beside him sleeps Sebastian’s boyfriend. Hunter’s body looks open, he has conquered lots of space after Sebastian had left bed about twenty minutes ago.

Sebastian chuckles quietly. It had been most absurd thing ever. Invitation to the big wedding hadn’t been immediate source of joy in their household, but Sebastian had bumped into Kurt few times in New York, and that’s why he had been curious.

“He is such a fine piece of ass nowadays”, he had told Hunter. “Of course not as fine as you..:” That was followed by a slap which made Hunter pleased. “But fine anyway. Why the hell would he want to be stuck with Anderson? Kurt needs experiences.”

At the wedding they had found more gorgeous Kurt Hummel than ever. People had fussed around him without noticing bitter look in his eyes or slightly green shade of his beautiful face. Then he had suddenly excused himself to bathroom and Sebastian had rolled his eyes at the sight.

“I bet he went to throw up. He is too young to his bullshit. This is ridiculous.”

Ridiculous or not, but it had happened. Kurt had married Blaine with a thin layer of sweat on his face and when they were dancing, it looked like he was leaning on his husband heavily. After one dance he sat down and started drinking like he was planning to drown in alcohol. Rest was history. 

Sebastian goes around the bed and gives a light kiss on Hunter’s forehead. Seeing his blue eyes open makes Sebastian’s stomach feel warm and weird. He is in love with this young man, and idea of that is still terrifying and so lovely.

“Good morning, sleepyhead. I’ll try to find some breakfast. Princess is probably grumpy when he wakes up.” They kiss, long and sweet. Hunter’s fingers stroke the side of his neck and Sebastian shivers. It's wonderful to see how gentle big guy like Hunter can be. After long and stressful day nothing is as beautiful as taking a bath with Hunter, who treats him like he would finest porcelain, too fragile to the cruel world. 

When he comes back with a tray, there is just confused Kurt Hummel with adorable bedhead. Sound of shower tells where Hunter is. “We didn’t have sex, right?” Not any weird and kinky threesome?” he asks, high voice higher than usually.

“No, you are as pretty as pretty can be but I don’t share my man. You were just determined that you wouldn’t sleep alone.”

“What happened then?”

“Well... You got pissed at Blaine-show. Then you decided that bartender was your new best friend. In the Blaine got glass of wine on his shirt, and you threw the ring away. You also wanted to break his nose but Hunter was already holding you.” Sebastian nods at his boyfriend who had returned from bathroom and looks super delicious just a towel around his waist. If they were alone Sebastian would ask a permission to lick waterdrops off his abs.  

“Oh my God, I have ruined everything and betrayed them all.”

“No, princess. You haven’t betrayed anybody, you just showed your real feelings, there is nothing wrong with it. Maybe you could have done it little bit earlier but it’s okay not to want to get married.”

“How about you two? Why are we here? What place is this?”

 “House of my aunt.” That’s easiest question to reply.

“You were crying”, Hunter starts suddenly. “Actually you were hysteric, yelling about it how you don’t wanna be married and it scares you. Your friends didn’t do anything, half of them were more worried about Blaine.”

“So we left with you. We couldn’t just leave you.”

His eyes are really wide, looking blue and grey at the same time. Kurt doesn’t move away when Hunter sits down next to him. “I didn’t want it. But... All of them were so excited and telling over and over again how important it was for Blaine and how I couldn’t ever find better man. But maybe I have other interests besides men. Maybe I want to be just Kurt. Not Kurt and Blaine. Or actually Blaine and his boyfriend.”

Corners of his beautiful eyes are suddenly watery. Kurt accepts Hunter’s arm around his waist. He looks small, fragile and too young to get a ring around his finger.

“What did your parents say about whole marriage-issue? Sebastian asks queitly. He takes a bite of his apple and offers other one to Hunter. Kurt shakes his head at food. 

Kurt just shrugs and looks uncomfortable. “If I’m completely honest, they made me feel like I couldn’t get anybody else.”

Sebastian makes a frustrated sound. “Are all these idiots blind or what? Kurt, you are fucking glorious”, he tells softly. “Do you really want to go back to NYADA with a wedding ring on your finger? Think about all those hot boys who would be ready to take you on dates. I’m not saying you should change man every week, but is it really bad to keep your eyes open? Chin up, princess.”

Looks like Kurt is desperately trying to believe Sebastian’s words.

In the end it's surprisingly nice day. They spend time together in Sebastian's aunt's guest room. Kurt looks horrified but pleased when he sees pizzas Sebastian had ordered. He is young-looking and fluffy in some sweatpants and a t-shirt he had borrowed from taller boy. Suddenly hysterical laughter fills the room and Sebastian exchanges a gaze with his boyfriend. "I can't believe this", Kurt giggles. "Of all people I spent my wedding night with Sebastian Smythe and his boyfriend. I'm a fucking mess."

"Sexy mess”, Sebastian reminds him.

He doesn't leave before early Monday morning. Little break from reality had done good to him. Kurt has a fierce look in his eyes and Sebastian knows that familiar, stubborn boy is there. Some people could wait difficult times with him. Sebastian is watching his leaving at the door, and it's not very pleasant how carefully Kurt's wide eyes study his face.

“You are different, Smythe. Not bad kind of different. That Sebastian who I knew back in high school wouldn’t have helped me in front of everyone.”

“It’s Hunter. He makes me a better person. He loves me, it’s that simple. It’s something I can trust every day. See you around, Hummel.”

 Sebastian watches him walking away. His posture is proud, Hummel would fix everything in his life, Sebastian has no doubts about that. 

It’s not earlier than eight months later when they meed again. Kurt is sitting at the table outside of tiny café, chocolate cake and coffee in front of him. His companion is a boy with happy eyes and glowing smile. His hair has purest shade of gold and when Sebastian is watching them, unknown boy makes Kurt laugh.

When Kurt spots him, his smile is honest. “Aaron, this is my friend Sebastian.”


	41. If this room was burning I wouldn't even notice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They haven’t fought – or if they have, Hunter doesn’t know about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used to ship Clato from THG. I still love it dearly as an idea. I have also kinda missed writing straight couples, so here is little genderswap-thing.

“Your puppy dog eyes are adorable Clarington, but them won't take you anywhere”, Sienna Smythe says teasing edge in her melodic voice. “You can take me to date on Friday evening. Movie and ice cream after that. Don’t you dare to buy tickets to any boring romcom, I wanna see that new action movie they have been talking about.”

Nick Duval grins at him when Sienna is gone. “Are you sure you can handle her? Sienna is dynamite. She can take you wherever she wants.” Hunter isn’t sure. There hadn’t been too many girls around at his old school. He is inexperienced where Sienna knows everything about boys. She is known to get bored easily and Sienna has dumped lots of guys after first and only date. Hunter should do an impression if he wants more than one evening.

He has tickets to wrong movie, of course. Sienna frowns and Hunter is sure she turns around and simply leaves, but in the end girl allows him to hold that small, soft hand and lead her to their seats. She looks amazing in her black skirt and yellow top, thick chocolate brown hair in a long ponytail. Her perfume is vanilla and Hunter feels slightly dizzy.

There their thing starts. Sienna doesn’t promise anything, she is like most beautiful ice queen Hunter has ever seen but they are definitely a thing. Hunter tries to keep his cool anyway, it’s clear that Sienna doesn’t want a boyfriend who follows her around like an embarrassing shadow. When Sienna informs him absent-mindedly that they are going to have a girls’ night with Jenna Sterling and few others, Hunter calls the guys to watch sports and have few beers.

Then one day, when they are having their daily morning coffee, Sienna comes to Hunter’s room with serious face and slightly puffy eyes. She has tried to cover that with darker make-up than usually but it’s still possible to see that something has made her upset. Sienna tastes her coffee without saying good morning. Mr. Puss curls up against her side and her fingers find his soft fur.

“What’s wrong, princess?” Sienna just shrugs and smiles at him that special smile which makes all boys weak. “Nothing, I'm just tired”, she replies crossing her beautiful, long legs. Her skirt is kinda short and Hunter can’t help watching all that bare, smooth skin. They haven’t gotten especially handsy yet. Hunter likes to think he is good guy and gentleman, and Sienna seems to like their kisses, hand-holding and sweet clichés.

It doesn’t get better when day passes. When weekend comes, Sienna is still distant and somehow tense. She doesn’t want to spend time with Hunter and he can’t help wondering if this is the end. If Sienna has gotten bored already.

It’s Jenna Sterling, who comes to his help. “Grapes and white chocolate”, she starts suddenly. It’s ten minutes before beginning of the practice and most of the Warblers aren’t around yet. Hunter just looks at her with wide eyes. He doesn’t get it. This sounds like something what Nick Duval should be listening to.

“Cuddles and PLL-marathon. Yeah, I think she would like that.”

Now he raises his eyebrows. They haven’t fought – or if they have, Hunter doesn’t know about it. In his eyes there is no reason to bribe Sienna with chocolate or that horrible TV-show.

Jenna notices his confusion and steps little closer. “Her cat died. He was old, Sienna didn’t want to upset him by taking him to new place, that’s why he was at her parents’ place. Sienna... What can I say about her? She doesn’t trust boys. She doesn’t trust even you. At least not yet. This is your change to earn that trust. She needs something to cheer her up.”

Hunter hadn’t even known that Sienna had had a cat. There are so many doors that haven’t been opened yet. Jenna just smiles at Hunter’s thanks. “You are good guy, Hunter. Sienna’s taste in men hasn’t always been best but I like you. You are worth my best friend.

“Hunt, I was looking for you after practice...” Sienna’s sentence is cut off when she sees everything what Hunter has prepared. He borrowed Jenna’s copy of Pretty Little Liars’ season one. There are also snacks Jenna had recommended and two glasses of fresh ice tea.

“It was Jenna, wasn’t it?” she just says and sits down on Hunter’s bed. Sienna doesn’t sound annoyed, she is more uncertain about whole situation.

“Yeah, it was and I’m happy about that. I wanna be there for you, Sienna. When you are happy, when you are sad. I’m your boyfriend and I want to know about these things, so I can comfort and help you.”

“You are different, Hunt. It scares the hell out of me but I like it. I like you.”


	42. And she's the only one I'd follow for eternity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is supposed to be my Huntbastian-collection. But I finally watched Maze Runner today. It caused some serious fanfiction-feels, and I don't wanna create new work just for one or maybe few fics. So I'm adding this one here even though it doesn't look exactly logical.
> 
> Doesn't absolutely follow canon. For example I just decided there is a lake in the area at least in my version. I have only seen that first movie, I haven't read those book, and I also wanted to avoid spoilers so I didn't examine Wiki-page or anything.
> 
> Title borrowed from Nickelback.

Minho knows he is different. Boys respect him because of his fastness, his skill to survive in the maze. They wouldn’t do it anymore if they knew how different Minho really is. When others have filled their heads with practical things like taking care of their shelters or plantations, Minho does his job like everybody else, but he still has time to think about stupid, girly things like butterflies and sunsets. His favourites are blue butterflies that have golden dots on their wings. He loves sunsets, it looks like flames would be colouring water of their little lake, and Minho enjoys those evenings when he can sit alone just watching it.

He has a habit to steal looks. When boys are washing themselves, Minho watches. Secretly. He knows it’s not exactly right, they have just each other and they have to be able to trust the community. But he can’t help it. Flat stomach, broad shoulders, tanned calves. He likes it all. Seeing those male bodies makes him wonder how it would feel to kiss a boy who has chapped lips and calloused hands. Sometimes he touches himself, wraps his fingers around his penis and creates beautiful fantasies, where it’s slow, gentle and unforgettable. There is no special boy. Those fantasy men are just faceless bodies. Then Newt comes.  

Minho is first one to greet him. “I won’t hurt you”, he promises. “Trust me”. He still remembers calming nothings from his own first day. Nobody forgets their own arrival, so this group of teenager guys has a natural want to protect newcomers. Boy looks a lot younger than his years, his face is soft and bit childish but wide, brown eyes are wise and mature. Fingers grab the hem of Minho’s blue shirt and it’s determined, he is scared but keeps that somehow under control. Others are trying to approach them but Newt shakes his head. “I want you”, he tells. So it's Minho who shows him the place, and is there to hold him when Newt remembers his name. Minho shares his sleeping place with other boy and feels like a creep when he sometimes lies awake watching his unconscious friend. 

Evening sun makes Newt’s hair almost orange. They are sitting together at the lake, their feet in cold, fresh water. Minho knows it’s stupid. Newt is a good friend, they share some similarities, even though Newt is the realistic, almost pessimistic one. That should be enough for him, Minho has no right to dream about more in their reality.

Kiss is rushed, Newt has barely time to register it happening. 

“Sorry, sorry sorry”, he repeats and is about to get up. Now it’s ruined. But Newt’s hands are there, them don’t let Minho go. “I wanna do it again.” Maybe first time is just curiosity. Both of them know there are boys who are getting off together, and Newt is exactly as clumsy virgin as Minho is. Their bodies react in different ways, when they are sharing wet kisses and moving against each other.

It's comfortable. Boyfriend would be too serious term in their world but Newt is always by his side. They sleep together, there are silly dates at lake, just fruits and ice-cold drinks but for them it's everything. Newt kisses him with hard lips, and that makes Minho weak.

Then that exact new guy arrives. Thomas is passionate about life. His eyes are full of fire and Newt looks curious when he watches other boy. Minho feels slow, it’s like Thomas wouldn’t ever stop. He talks and laughs, makes questions and seems to want to be Newt’s new best buddy. Jealousy is painful in his veins, and Minho is sure he would lose everything. Thomas is exciting and better. Minho is restless, wants to have something else to think about besides his failing, fragile dream. It’s stupid to take risks in the maze, Minho knows it better than anybody. But taking risks seems to ease ache in his heart when he thinks about Thomas and Newt, their heads pressed together and those quiet discussions.

After third night Minho is exhausted. He is late, almost crawling towards safe haven but it seems to be too far. Even his excellent physique is limited, he has done too much, has been too rough with himself and now price should be paid. Maze would take it’s own. Desperate cry escapes his lips, and suddenly somebody yells his name as an answer.

Determined steps drum the ground. New hasn’t ever been fastest of the boys but now his huge willpower gives him wings. “Minho, my Minho”, he whispers in the dark-haired boy’s ear. “You have to come, little bit more, you can do it. You have always been fastest and best, please.” It’s his heart-breaking voice which convinces Minho. Other boy drags him out of the maze. They fall to the ground, Newt on top of him, and before Minho can say anything, there are lips kissing him like tomorrow wouldn't come

Curious eyes are watching them, somebody snorts but some other person comments how sweet they are. But there is something much more important. Newt backs off a bit and Minho’s hands are cupping his lovely, precious face.

“Oh my god, do you have a fucking death wish?” Other boy asks angrily, looking like he is ready to punch Minho with his small fist.

“You and Thomas”, Minho replies, shakily, his fingers sweaty on Newt’s warm skin. Other boy smiles, amused and emotional at the same time. “It’s you idiot, not anybody else. Not Thomas, just you. But you have to keep yourself safe or I’ll may change my opinion.”

His dirty face is teary, Newt’s patient fingers wipe the drops away.


	43. Dancer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I remember when I was just "testing" writing Huntbastian and my precious plan was to stay in the Kurtbastian-tag. Rest is history but I'm not doing same now, I have used too much time by thinking and planning my personal Huntbastian-world, and I'm actually right now working on my next Huntbastian-thing. 
> 
> These Minho/Newt-drabbles just give me life.

He is a dancer. Running is Minho’s passion, he feels most alive on the track. Most guys in their social circle play football, but Newt is dancer and that makes him different. But he is proud about it, nobody dares to say anything when tall and lean boy with burning eyes tells about it. His tongue is sharp, everybody knows that, and bullies of the school leave him alone.

Few months later he comes to school clutching few red pieces of paper in his fist. Them are tickets to show. “We have been working our asses off”, he tells, voice full of doubts. “If you just wanna come, I have tickets to everybody. He still doesn’t trust them, Newt is waiting for teasing words and unpleasant comments.

Thomas is first one to nod. Other boys don’t look so eager but Newt’s shoulders become less tense when hands tap his back and appreciative comments are thrown. “That’s cool, man!” “Of course we’ll come to see you." Minho is last one to take a ticket. He reads the name of the show and then looks at Newt whose brown eyes have careful look. “What kind of show is this?” Genuine smile appears on his usually serious face. Minho feels all warm and funny when Newt takes his time to explain whole thing. He is almost late from his first class because of that.

He is a fucking star. Auditorium where they are performing, doesn’t have any big world’s class or style, but when Newt and his group are on the stage, whole place has new kind of energy. Any of the boys hasn’t seen him dancing before and Newt is making a clear impression.

“He has to teach those moves to us. Girls would like them”, some of the boys whispers and others chuckle quietly. Minho doesn’t want to learn moves, he wants to watch Newt who is sparkling, beautiful creature when he moves on the stage easily. His partner, tiny brunette in forest green dress is good too but he doesn’t have Newt’s energetic way to move, and Minho can imagine how that pisses girl off.

When the show is over, he follows other guys to the back quietly. Somebody had remembered to buy flowers and Newt looks pleasantly surprised when slightly damaged lilies are pushed to his hands. 

“Can I come again?” he asks after boys have left. Blond boy puts his flowers on the table with loving hands and stares at Minho beneath his almost golden locks. “If you really want, we are practicing here every Saturday and Sunday. But it’s early, you should sacrifice your night sleep.” Dark-haired boy nods, touching Newt’s sweaty shoulder. He doesn’t give promises and Newt probably thinks it’s just empty talking, nice thing to say on a moment like that.

But next Saturday he is there, sitting in almost too comfy, red chair. Their director is surprisingly friendly when she brings Minho a cup of hot chocolate. It’s not really warm in the auditorium and he is yawning violently. “It’s nice to meet Newt’s friend”, blond woman in her thirties tells. “He doesn’t really talk about himself.”

It becomes a routine. Minho is there on most weekends and after the practise they go to coffee shop. Newt’s fingers are restless, he still has energy left. Sometimes they do homework, Newt is genius at maths and Minho can offer his help in French. Blond boy nibbles his bagel carefully like a little bird and silence between them is comfortable. It’s not really surprising when Newt introduces him to Kiaran but tight knot of jealousy in his stomach is something what Minho hadn’t understood to wait. Kiaran is tall and blond, his muscular chest looks amazing in black tank top and he looks at Newt like he would be more valuable than all the treasures of the world together.

_(“He was too perfect”, Newt whispers in Minho’s ear, his strong, long legs around his waist and hands caressing Minho’s sensitive neck. “You are real.”)_


	44. If you'll be my Louisiana I'll be your Mississippi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You don’t have to”, Hunter reminds him even though his pants are painfully tight. But other boy is already spreading his long, gorgeous legs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Highly personal, that's most important thing I can say about this one. This isn't meant to be any kind of proper representation of anything, I have just found out some things about myself during this winter and handled my emotions through this fic. And of course I know that when we think about canon, asexual Sebastian Smythe is absurd idea but that has never stopped me.
> 
> Title borrowed from Blake Shelton.

Sebastian is young and lively. He is spending summer vacation in Italy, and his carefree, trusting parents have started every morning by giving him few bills and telling him to have some fun. Sebastian obeyed happily. Cider was sweet in his mouth and for a moment getting his nipples pierced looked like a fun idea. It’s all about experiences, in the end life isn’t very complicated.

Sunshine almost blinds his eyes and hand of Italian boy feels exciting and sweet in his own. He doesn’t know the name of the guy, he is just pretty face and nice body, first of many. Dark-haired boy opens his mouth and says something in that melodic language. Sebastian doesn’t know what it is but he just nods happily. He is drunk from alcohol and this boy.

Other boy leads him to the beach. It’s tiny and private-looking place, Sebastian is pretty sure nobody would bother them, even though he doesn’t see getting caught as massive catastrophe. This is summer adventure, anybody important wouldn’t know about it. Surprised eyes of judging adults would be something he could laugh at in the distant future.

Golden sand is sweetly soft against bare skin, and being naked outside feels just fun and relaxing. Sebastian has no reason to be ashamed of his body. He doesn’t miss darkness to cover his skin, other boy can see everything. Fingers are mapping Italian boy’s tanned skin and Sebastian hisses at uncomfortable feeling. It gets easier but he doesn’t experience rockets, stars or any other stellar phenomena. There is a short, almost tickling kiss on his cheek before other guy pulls out and takes his blue shirt. Sebastian sighs, he is sore and leaking cum. Fucking without a condom hadn’t been just teenager restlessness, it was simply a stupid act but Sebastian is fast to forgive himself.

Sebastian walks into sea naked. Sun kisses his skin and water makes him clean again. His arms are crossed across his chest while he tries to understand those happenings. Okay, his first time had been rushed and not special in any way but same had happened to so many other people. It would get better in the future. Practice makes perfect after all. 

He starts looking for that one, special guy with whom sex would start to make sense. He doesn’t tell anybody what had happened on the beach. They would just mention too early experiences and call him traumatized. Sebastian isn’t traumatized. He just doesn’t get sex. Why everybody is so excited about it? After going through dozens of men it’s still an unsolved mystery.

He has even doubts about himself. It’s easy to flirt with cute blonde at the club but when they are kissing in the dark corner, everything is horribly wrong. Girl is beautiful, yes, Sebastian can appreciate her looks. But her body is wrong, too light against his own. Lips are sticky and taste like artificial strawberry. So when she looks like she is ready to go, Sebastian lies something not so smooth about headache and leaves alone.

It’s same with everybody. Flirting with Blaine Anderson is just something he is used to do. If he didn’t do it boys would wonder, and Sebastian doesn’t want to draw attention to those things. He isn’t more different than gay, maybe there hasn’t just been right partner yet. 

Actually Kurt Hummel is prettier in his eyes but Anderson is easier. Sebastian doesn’t need to try his best with him. It’s not really a big deal when getting into Blaine’s pants is impossible, that would save him from one more uncomfortable and sticky night.

Hunter Clarington is determined and traditional. For the first time in his life Sebastian Smythe is experiencing real romance. He thinks something is wrong when Hunter passes a change to get into his bed after first date. It’s almost shameful feeling, maybe he isn’t desirable enough in his eyes. Hunter just holds him close, strokes his back and kisses his cheek lightly. “You are more than this, Bastian.”

Bastian. Hunter doesn’t know or notice it but he is the one who gives that nickname to him. To his parents and sister he is usually Sebastian, to Jeff sweetie or Seb, and to his lacrosse buddies Smythe. Bastian is something he cherishes late at night when Hunter is sleeping, his breathing sounding safe in Sebastian’s ears.

Hunter likes to think he is good boyfriend. When they started this thing, their relationship, Hunter knew he would do anything to keep Sebastian happy, relaxed and satisfied.

Of course last point needs some studying at first. He has of course been naked in the presence of other guys but it’s completely different with Sebastian. Sebastian’s dark eyes don’t leave him when Hunter strips off his clothes. He is more self-conscious than ever when his boxers are dropped, but that gaze from his boyfriend is gentle and Hunter dares to relax.

“Relax baby, this is supposed to be fun”, Sebastian whispers when he straddles Hunter. Hunter feels clumsy but then Sebastian’s hands are there. “Just follow me, gorgeous. And open your mouth if this is uncomfortable, if you wanna stop.”

Hunter has always been a fast learner. After few first times it’s his most important goal to make sure that Sebastien is satisfied, that he gets everything he wants in bed. It looks good. Sebastian’s moans have no shame and he takes cock like a pro. But when Hunter spends time studying his face, his gestures and Sebastian’s whole attitude towards sex, there is something little bit worrying.

There are glimpses of pure disgust on his face. Looks like Sebastian is holding something back, like he wouldn’t want to be in whole situation. Hunter tries to fix it, he tries to please Sebastian even more but that doesn’t work. It’s just awkward, Sebastian backs off and Hunter feels like worst lover in the world.

It’s impossible to keep his mouth shut even though it could be a good idea. It’s Friday evening, Sebastian is sitting at his desk and probably writing an e-mail to his sister like every other Friday. Hunter lies on the bed, text book in front of him but instead of studying he has been watching Sebastian. Other boy is beautiful. Dim light in the room gives his hair warm shade and seeing him in Hunter’s sweater makes him slightly possessive. He wouldn’t ever admit it but he likes  especially those lazy Saturdays when formal uniform isn’t required and Sebastian comes to breakfast wearing Hunter’s clothes. “Them are soft and nice”, he once answered when Hunter asked what was so special in his wardrobe.

“Were you hurt?” Hunter has to raise his voice when he gets no reaction. Sebastian frowns and turns to look at Hunter. “What are you talking about? I’m fine if we don’t talk about that moment in rehearsal when Nick collided with me.”

“No...” Hunter squirms on his spot and almost regrets even starting whole conversation. “I mean sex. Did some guy force you...?” Sebastian blinks like an owl. He doesn’t clearly like this topic at all.

“Where are you getting your ideas, Hunt?”

“Well, you don’t apparently like our sex life. What’s your problem, Bastian? Am I that bad in bed, or what?”

“Why can’t you just leave this topic? No, I wasn’t assaulted and no, your skills in bed are magnificent if your ego really needs to be stroked so badly. I just don’t want it. I don’t even want to see your fucking cock, I don’t wanna get all sweaty and sticky with you or anybody else. I just don’t like sex.”

Sebastian has tears of frustration in his eyes because he is so fucking broken. People don’t just fucking understand, there is some huge mistake in him and that’s why this shit doesn’t work. Hunter is first one who really hears his thoughts about sex, and when Sebastian sees how confused his eye are, he knows secret wouldn’t be told again. It’s just too weird, who teenager boy wouldn’t like sex?

Hunter reaches his hand, he doesn’t want to let Sebastian go when he is like this, shaking, emotional, overwhelmed, but other boy doesn’t accept that. “I’m... I think I’ll go to check if I can sleep with some of the boys tonight. I don’t really want to talk about this now”, he explains and Hunter can’t do anything except accept it.

His experiences in emotional challenges are very limited but Hunter has always handled all academic difficulties naturally. So next day, after lots of ignoring from Sebastian, he goes to peaceful corner in the library and opens his laptop. Finding appropriate information doesn’t take long, and Hunter can’t understand why Sebastian hasn’t ever done it. He studies the terms and information, something called homoromantic seems to be suitable for Sebastian but his own opinion should be asked.

He is waiting for Sebastian when lacrosse-practice is finished. Other boy waves to his friend and turns around with a smile on his face but that smile disappears when he spots Hunter. "I wanna talk, beautiful. It was't a question." Sebastian sighs heavily but follows him to their room. 

“They are called asexuals, beautiful.” Sebastian doesn’t say anything but his eyes are running across papers. It’s heart-breaking to see that confused hope on his face. “So I’m not broken”, Sebastian mumbles after silence. “There are other people like me.”

“Yeah, some people just don’t care about that stuff.”

Sebastian lies down and pulls Hunter with him. It’s a sweet feeling when other boy snuggles up against his side. “I like this”, he explains in low voice. “It makes me feel safe, your heartbeats and warmth are like drug for me.”

“How do you see my body?” It's a silly question, tells all about Hunter's fragile, manly ego but he can't help asking it. Sebastian doesn't sound annoyed, though. 

“It makes me delighted. You are beautiful, you are fully cabable to please my eyes. I just don’t want to get physical with you. And your face. Oh my fucking god, I could probably spend hours just staring at you happily.” That kind of sweetness makes Sebastian’s cheeks hot. Hunter touches rosy blush with light fingers and gives a kiss on his forehead.

“Was that okay?”

 “I’m not that fragile, Hunt.” His voice is warm but there is anyway something warning behind the words.

 It’s not easy to make whole thing work, of course not. Sometimes Hunter is so frustrated and horny that he would like to take and own, and take and kiss and bite and thrust, but then he remembers how he likes Sebastian. How his reading glasses make him look like a sexiest nerd ever. How he makes tea when Hunter is sick and strokes his sweaty hair as long as Hunter wants. When he is lying in the bed, Sebastian sitting next to him, that whole situation makes him feel safe. It’s their own little bubble, his boyfriend is between Hunter and door, he would fight all the nightmares away. That’s the greatest balance in their relationship. Hunter may be Sebastian’s saving prince on white horse but Sebastian is exactly same for him.

Hunter has always been proud of his unbreakable self-control, so then he just decides that sex isn’t important. There was anyway other things to think about during his time at military school so he can achieve same state of mind again.

Hunter doesn’t want to hear questions or jokes about their sex life. There is Jeff who doesn’t have bad intentions, who just says something reckless, and Hunter snaps at him. Blond boy startles and his eyes are scared. In a heartbeat Sebastian is behind his chair when Nick pulls Jeff away. Hunter opens his arms when his boyfriend’s familiar weight conquers his lap.

“Are you ashamed of me?” Sebastian asks quietly. His fingers are calming in Hunter’s hair.

“No, never, beautiful. Those things are private. Even though we would be fucking like rabbits, I wouldn’t share anything to boys.”

"You are chaste then, gorgeous. I wouldn’t have expected that from you.” There is a kiss, slow and sweet. Hunter hides his face in Sebastian’s neck and inhales his scent.

“Is there something wrong if I want to be a gentleman? I have to apologize Jeff.” Sebastian just holds him. This is what he craves in his boyfriend. He is always there, Sebastian is never afraid of Hunter’s temperament. He gets time to calm down and Sebastian isn’t immediately judging him for those mistakes.

“Of course not, gorgeous. You are best boyfriend a guy could get. I’ll talk to Jeff. He is my best friend anyway, he should know.”

“You don’t have to tell your secret because of me”, Hunter argues softly. Sebastian's gentleness makes him almost sleepy. "No, gorgeous. I have planned doing it anyway."

“Doesn’t it frustrate you?” They are lying on their towels and watching boys who play football in the sand. Sebastian is gorgeous, sun has faded his dark hair and painted some new freckles on his nose. In the morning Hunter had kissed that same nose and made Sebastian giggle.

He turns to watch Jeff, who has put his book, newest Pendergast away, and looks at him curiously. Summer day has made Hunter relaxed, he can’t guess what’s Jeff’s purpose. After all they aren’t that good buddies.

“I mean Sebastian and whole no sex-thing. You know, he is sometimes worried about you.”

“I don’t want pity from people. Look at him. He is such a beautiful creature and he is mine. I think we are exactly like any other couple. Some things just don’t work between some people and in our relationship sex is different topic.” His words are slightly attacking, Hunter knows that. But if people actually knew, there would be so many pitying eyes, worldess questions and those horrible innuendos. _Aren’t you wasting your time with him?_

Jeff smiles familiar, gentle smile. “You know I didn’t mean it like that. Not personally. I want nothing except Sebastian’s happiness.

Their discussion is cut off when Sebastian arrives to Hunter’s side. “Hey baby”, Hunter greets hand around Sebastian’s neck. He smells like sunshine and sea and Hunter can’t help smiling when lips touch his own easily. “Ice-cream, honey?” he asks with a smirk on his lips. Sugary pet name is kinda joke but Hunter knows there is emotion behind that word.

Sometimes Hunter simply gets what he wants. Kissing gets heated, and Sebastian jus stares at him with wide eyes. “You don’t have to”, Hunter reminds him even though his pants are painfully tight. But other boy is already spreading his long, gorgeous legs. 

“It’s okay, we are okay”, he mumbles when Hunter’s fingers are lost on his inner thigh. It’s so precious, he feels so privileged when Sebastian allows it. Other boy looks calm but Hunter takes his time anyway. He is extremely gentle when he uses lots of lube to prepare Sebastian. There is no pain or discomfort when Hunter enters his boyfriend. Kisses distract Sebastian, he is one hell of a kisser and Hunter moans when fingers find sensitive skin of his neck. “I love you”, green-eyed boy whispers. “So so much.” Returning those words it’s simple and beautiful act.


	45. Swan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He is like a rag doll in Hunter’s hands when he loses it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was actually writing genderswap + pregnancy thing, but then this happened instead of it. Unhappy Huntbastian, mentions of violence and blood but nothing very graphic. Tiny hint of Sebastian Smythe/Kurt Hummel.

Too many bruises later Sebastian is standing at the door, Emmy on the leash next to him. Small dog is nervous, she knows her favourite human isn’t okay right now. There is horrible bloodstain covering Sebastian’s face but he is pretty sure nothing is broken. Suitcase Emmy is sniffing contains just clean clothes for few days and couple of files full of his work papers. He could grab rest later or maybe Jeff would do it.

Sebastian’s hands are completely calm when he takes wedding ring away. Too many times he had believed Hunter’s words. He had lied on the floor, just a pitiful bundle, only a shadow of old, confident Sebastian Smythe. Hunter had kissed his bruises and promised that no, it wouldn’t happen ever again, he loves Sebastian and that love would fix everything. His ribs had been aching and sore, but Sebastian had trusted Hunter and allowed those tentative fingers and light lips on his stomach and inner thighs. Their kisses tasted blood. Right now even thinking about that kind of intimacy and vulnerability makes him sick. Few years back it had felt sexy how strong Hunter was but Sebastian can’t live like this. He is like a rag doll in Hunter’s hands when he loses it.

Other man steps out of bedroom making Sebastian blink furiously. “Stay there.” It doesn’t sound like him, and when it looks like nobody hears his command, it’s his tiny dog who tiptoes in front of him and lets out a small growl. Emmy hasn’t ever been Hunter’s biggest fan, she probably recognizes devoded cat person.

“Please, Bastian. Please, you know I didn’t mean it.” Sebastian hates to see Hunter like this. He is almost as fine as before. Simple t-shirt hugs his chest and arms, and his boyish smile is still Sebastian’s most horrible weakness. But those eyes, almost dead blue eyes reveal glimpses of things Hunter had seen. Those happenings had destroyed carefree boy and made him this man Sebastian doesn’t even know anymore.

 “You need fucking therapy, Clarington. I’m supposed to be your greatest treasure but it doesn’t feel like that right now.”

Emmy doesn’t look happy when Sebastian decides they would wait cab outside but he couldn’t care less about his soaked clothes or flat and wet hair. Cab driver, older man looks horrified when Sebastian slides inside. He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and throws a big bill to the man, telling an address in quiet, steady voice. Money is returned when they are at Sebastian’s destination. “My daughter’s boyfriend used to hit her. She is dead now. Take care of yourself.”

“Oh my fucking god”, Jeff blurts when the door to their comfortable apartment is opened. “Take Emmy”, he commands Nick who is just stepping out of living room. Sebastian is suddenly tired, staying rational after one of the nastier encounters with Hunter had asked lots of mental energy. Familiar, safe arms are offering support and he trusts everything to Jeff’s hands.

After waking up it takes few minutes to understand where he is. Blue ceiling of the bedroom doesn’t belong to him. Room is filled with pale brown furniture and photos of friends and family cover big areas of the walls. Sebastian smiles at the picture where he is kissing Jeff’s cheek at their wedding party, but that smile fades because next photo shows him and Hunter. He is sitting on Hunter’s lap, muscled arm around his waist. It’s not a new photo, Hunter hasn't given him similar look for a long time.

Somebody knocks on the closed door carefully. Sebastian swallows a lump from his throat and makes an incoherent noise to inform he is awake.

It’s Jeff with a tray. There is also Emmy, she rushes to bed and then jumps easily. Sebastian takes a look at his friend – is it allowed, but Jeff just smiles. He has always had a soft spot for tiny chihuahua. When smell of the food reaches his nose, Sebastian understands he is truly hungry. Jeff has prepared an omelette. There is orange juice in a glass and lonely flower decorating the tray. He sits down on the bed with a heavy sigh.

“I didn’t wash your face because you were so tired. When was last time you slept properly?” His brown eyes are worried. Those most loyal eyes see through Sebastian usually easily, but with this issue he had managed to cheat everybody. 

“I have slept”, Sebastian tells slowly. “It’s just... Oh, fuck, Jeff. He was just so different when he came back. I didn’t marry a guy who I can’t trust. You know him, Hunter was always hot-headed but it’s now on a whole different level.”

“So every time... When you had bruises from colliding with glass door or falling on the stairs, it was Hunter every time, right?” Wide eyes are filling with pity and okay, this is one of those unsaid reasons why he kept secret hidden so long. Sebastian wouldn’t take those emotions. He isn’t weak, he doesn’t need to be treated like some fragile thing. He has responsibilities and whole life to fix.

But Jeff is possibly the person who knows him best. He is able to notice warning gaze in Sebastian’s green eyes and his own face is immediately more neutral. “You need a place to stay, I guess?” Sebastian nods, he would need time and place to plan everything. Dumping Hunter had been fast decision, no matter how long he had been pushed to that direction. Jeff makes an offering gesture with his hand. "Our guest room is yours as long as you ever need it. You know it Sebastian."

Next morning Hunter arrives. Jeff snorts at light smell of alcohol and sweat. He looks totally horrible with red eyes and crinkled clothes but Sebastian’s bloody face had been worse. He is sleeping peacefully with Emmy guarding him, and Hunter wouldn’t destroy that fragile calmness.

He tries to behave like nothing would be wrong but Jeff knows better. Hunter could have even prepared some kind of proper lie. “Have you seen Sebastian?” he just asks in blunt style. Jeff frowns and he can’t help letting out sharp comment which is already waiting on his tongue.

“I suppose you have done something if you have to look for him like this.” Blue eyes flash and Jeff steps back. He would move faster than Hunter, he trusts that but his big hands are anyway very threatening.

“Get out of here Hunter or I’ll call the police, and you can explain them why Sebastian is missing. One more step, I’m ready.” Jeff is used to Nick’s soft, polite words so this new kind of coldness makes him shiver. Shorter man walks behind him and wraps his arm around Jeff. Hunter is suddenly unsure, in a fight he could probably take both of them down without real struggle but police is different topic. He chooses escaping.

“I can’t believe it”, Nick mumbles softly when their ex-captain is gone. “Hunter was so fucking in love with him. How is this possible?”

“It’s not just about Hunter. He isn't bad guy, he has just seen things we can't even imagine. We can’t understand what is happening in his head. But that doesn’t give him a right to use Sebastian as his personal punching bag.”

Watching it aches Jeff’s heart. At first Sebastian is timid, most of his time is spent in the corner of the sofa with Emmy resting on his lap. Sebastian pets small dog or reads books from their shelf. He has special soft spot for Harry Potter and those books make him laugh hesitantly. Every time when Jeff bangs the door or raises his voice to Nick, he feels bad because of Sebastian’s widened eyes. “It’s okay, sweetie”, he promises kissing dark hair.

He doesn’t know what clicks but it happens anyway. There are hints of old Sebastian, at first slightly bitchy comment at breakfast. When they are looking for new pair of jeans for Jeff, his friend asks if Jeff’s ass has gotten bigger since last time. It hasn't but blond man hurries to mirror anyway. Sebastian's laugh is honest and genuine. Jeff tries to keep his annoyed face, but that's impossible. 

Weeks later he leaves. "I need a break from everything", Sebastian explains with hazy eyes, fingers tapping bright blue suitcase. "I talked with my dad, he wanted to slaughter Hunter but understood when I explained I wouldn't like to go back to work immediately."

I'm leaving tomorrow, princess. You'll get postcards and souvenirs but I'm not sure when I get back."

It happens in München. Sebastian wakes up in his hotel room, Kurt Hummel's phone number written on his right hand. That’s exciting and scary, but he doesn’t think about it too much after saving number in his phone. Visiting Allianz Arena feels much more important.


	46. Prince

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You like him, cupcake. Without any real feelings you would have ditched him ages ago”, Hunter drops obvious facts, and rolls over to his back. Sebastian is suddenly feeling cuddly, and Hunter doesn’t protest when is forced to share his bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. Everyone knows Sebastian Smythe. Most people probably know also Newt from Maze Runner. So how about Newt/Sebastian and Huntbastian as brotp?

Newt likes boys, yes. So far he hasn’t done anything to that exact fact. When one of the Warblers is throwing him flirty gazes, it’s almost scary. Suddenly he doesn’t know what to do with his hands or where to look at. Because this boy is handsome, he looks confident and experienced, and Newt simply can’t stand there looking like a tiny bunny in headlights. He scans the room, most of the boys are still unknown for him, but he manages to spot easiest source of kindness he knows. When few new boys had been waiting for their turns to audition, Jeff Sterling had been there too. This babbling, happy creature had fascinated boys and Jeff had taken especially Newt under his wings.

Now he offers a dazing smile when Newt approaches other boy. They are sitting on the sofa with shorter brunette. “Hey sweetie. How are you doing?” Jeff asks, and pushes dark-haired boy gently, so Newt can sit too.

“I’m fine. What’s his name?” he nods towards co-captain secretly, trying to sound like he wouldn’t be especially interested. He is now talking to the captain of the Warblers, Hunter Clarington, if Newt remembers right.

Jeff follows his gaze and smiles bit sleepily. “You already know Hunter, so you have to be talking about Sebastian. He is Sebastian Smythe, co-captain of the Warblers and captain in the lacrosse team. I’m not telling more. Sebastian is something what you have to experience, he is impossible to explain.”

Newt sighs and he doesn’t know if staying very far from Sebastian would be good idea.

Sebastian Smythe doesn’t do crushes. He likes fast and harmless fucks, not pretty boys with wide, brown eyes and soft cheeks. Whole appearance of new boy screams purest possible virginity and Sebastian doesn’t do virgins either, because they are complicated and demanding, usually thinking that one night means being practically engaged.

But when he looks at this new boy, there is something weird and fluttering in stomach. He hasn’t felt that before.

“Stop staring at him”, Hunter Clarington, their dear captain and his absolute best friend suggests. “You don’t want to scary our newest pretty blond away.”

Sebastian tries to offer as innocent smile as possible, but Hunter isn’t taking that. “No, no. I don’t believe you, cupcake. You have something horrible in your mind, and I have to clean the mess like usually.”

There is no time before Hunter Clarington in his mind. They grew up together, laughing, playing football and video games, and sometimes crying or yelling. Sebastian’s first time was with Hunter because it just looked easiest way to get rid of V-card. It was just like first time should be, fun, gentle and relaxed. Afterwards they ate croissants and chocolate which was stolen from Stacey. He is slightly afraid of the day when Hunter will solve whole “boys or girls or maybe both”-issue and introduces his partner to Sebastian. Because who the hell could be good enough to his buddy, his partner in crime, his brother from another mother?

After the rehearsal Sebastian is already there, offering his hand with charming smile on his lips. Newt looks mostly suspicious when their hands touch. His grip is pleasantly tight, it tells all about strong personality. “Sebastian Smythe. Would you like to have coffee?” He could have used some smoother line, but jumpy feeling is still in his stomach. At least other boy is considering his suggestion. Quiet yes isn’t sign of endless love, but Sebastian could work with it.

Newt is private, doesn’t let people near himself easily. It’s a new concept for Sebastian who has always been open and made friends easily, even though his personality can be too hard and blunt for many people. But step by step Newt relaxes and gives pieces of himself. Sebastian learns to know things. Newt has an older sister, sister has a dog. He likes horror movies and reading, but dancing is his biggest passion which is clear for anybody who has ever attended their rehearsals. It feels like an achievement when he manages to make Newt laugh.

“I think we are at least bros now”, he tells hesitantly. Hunter lies on his bed, dressed in sweater and sweatpants, ankles crossed. He is pretending to be focused on a text book but Sebastian knows he is listening. “But I don’t know how to continue from there.”

“You like him, cupcake. Without any real feelings you would have ditched him ages ago”, Hunter drops obvious facts, and rolls over to his back. Sebastian is suddenly feeling cuddly, and Hunter doesn’t protest when is forced to share his bed.

“I wouldn’t want to like him”, he confesses, because who he could tell if not Hunter? “It’s scary. I don’t want to give away weapons to hurt me.”

Hunter thinks about that. His fingers draw mindless pictures on the wall and Sebastian presses himself closer. There isn’t any sexual undertone, it’s just something what they are used to do, and even though Sebastian doesn’t admit it to most people, he likes these slow moments of friendly, physical closeness.

“It’s not manly to say something like this, and you can say goodbye to your dick if someone else hears this, but I would catch you if something bad happened. I think it’s time for you to learn that relationships aren’t dangerous. Sure them can break your heart, but you should give them a change. You can’t be heartless bitch for your whole life.” Now those gentle fingers comb his hair and Sebastian’s eyelids start to feel heavy.

“Can we take a nap together?”

“Sure, cupcake.”

In the end it’s Newt who takes that important step. They are standing behind Dalton stables, listening to night and watching stars. Sebastian hasn’t ever been excited about that kind of romantic clichés but entranced look on other boy’s face is worth it all. His shoulders are covered with Sebastian’s jacket and when Newt's fingers are looking for something, dark-haired boy takes his hand.

“I have never been kissed”, Newt confesses, his voice breathless and somehow hopeful. “I didn’t imagine it would be with someone dark and handsome.” Now he is cheeky, Sebastian can’t interpret wrong.

He cups that precious face, and Newt has just a moment to take deep breath before they melt into a kiss. There is something very needy in air when other boy pushes closer, takes his place between Sebastian’s arms so naturally. He wouldn’t like to stop it, Sebastian’s fingers are itching to slide beneath Newt’s clothes but for once he has to be a gentleman. This couldn’t be ruined.

“What are we?” he blurts out. Newt takes his hand offering that angelic smile.

“If you want, we can be boyfriends.”

Sebastian Smythe wasn’t supposed to do boyfriends either but now he has one. And he wants to do things to make Newt happy, which is new area too. Serenading him is just idea he is playing with for some weeks, before consulting other partner in crime, his twin sister Stacey.

“Do you think it’s not ridiculous idea?”

“Of course not. If some guy did same to me... I would melt, I think. But I hope it’s not going to be very public, he doesn’t sound like a guy who enjoys huge gestures.”

On the other hand Sebastian isn’t a guy who wants to show off their relationship. Newt is his biggest treasure and that person who tries to mess with him will have endless pleasure to explain his actions to angrily glaring Sebastian.

They are spending weekend at Sebastian’s father’s empty house when he does it. Leaving the bed isn’t exactly easy, Newt tries to reach him in his sleep, when best source of body heat is suddenly gone. Dark-haired boy dresses quietly and tiptoes to his piano which is standing in the corner of the room.

Sebastian has always appreciated resources Dalton offers for music, but it’s different to play his own piano. Fingers moving on keys are almost loving. At first Newt stays still when music fills the room, just some blond hair can be seen. It’s Sebastian's singing that makes him sit up, but he has to focus on his task even though following other boy’s reaction would be so interesting. Newt presses his feet on cold wooden floor and gets up slowly. Besides his blue underwear blond boy is wearing just Sebastian’s white t-shirt.

Sebastian’s eyes are stinging when song leaves the room. He had given his everything but sometimes he isn’t sure if it's enough. Other boy hugs him from behind and kisses salty stripe on his cheek. “It was beautiful. Thank you.”

Newt is playing with his sister’s dog’s puppies and Sebastian just knows he is totally screwed when watching it is so fucking interesting. It’s quite a sight when his lap is covered in black Labrador retrievers. All small, eager animals want to have his attention, but blond boy manages to give his love to all of them.

When smallest of the pups is picked up, Sebastian’s phone is ready. Picture shows blond boy kissing dog’s head, and he looks absolutely beautiful. Uploading picture to his Instagram is fast idea tha makes Sebastian suspicious. Is it wise to show what kind of sappy person he is with Newt? In the end picture goes to internet with tags like #myprince #precious #beautiful #iloveyou.

He almost deletes it when embarrassing little girls start to leave their aww-comments. How the hell they even found his poor picture? But Sebastian leaves it, when first of his friends writes his comment. Apparently he should appreciate these dudes a lot more than he does. Seeing Stacey’s comment  “ _When am I going to meet him?”_ makes him grin hesitantly. It’s not absolutely sure if letting Stacey and Newt together is a good idea.

Comments are so fascinating that feeling familiar weight beside him makes Sebastian blink. Puppies are sleeping as black pile, and Newt has decided he needs his boyfriend’s attention now. Before he can react, Newt peeks his screen closely, and wide smile appears on his face so naturally.

“I love you too”, he tells, and Sebastian just shrugs. “Are you absolutely sure? You are such a precious thing. There could be better boyfriend-candidates to you.”

“You will stop with that bullshit right now, Sebastian. You can be so gentle and sweet if you just want to. There is no other guy who I would like to have. It’s only you.”

Three years later Hunter Clarington is safely sleeping, until his phone distracts it. Sebastian’s number is still saved with name “cupcake” and he knows who it is before checking the screen. Violet sobbing scares the fuck out of him, but when Sebastian finally manages to get words out, Hunter reveices right message. Newt had said yes. For some unknown reason he has decided to tie himself to Hunter’s dear cupcake. He congratulates shortly and ends the call.

Hunter is sleeping before his head even touches pillow.


	47. Meet me on the other side (kisses from Norway) (1/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “No, they don’t need a thing. We can eat your cookies later."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit older idea, inspired by my Norway-trip few months back. Lots of so called artistic freedom, and that one sentence at the end of part two isn't mine. You know what I'm talking about.

At first he gets formal information about those happenings. “He is missing, probably dead.” It’s not concrete in Sebastian’s mind. There is no body he could greet for the one last time, so everything just makes him horribly empty.

His friends come to take care of him and his life. Nick and Jeff don’t ask stupid questions, they just let him be and do whatever he likes as long as it’s not anything stupid like harming himself. There is always at least one of them, when Sebastian tries to cope and understand.

Nick is sitting by his bed, Sebastian almost sleeps, it’s so quiet and peaceful. Sharp sunlight can’t get to room because thick curtains are closed. His friend doesn’t complain even though he has to read his newspaper in the light of his phone.

Both, Nick and Jeff startle when doorbell rings but it doesn’t get a reaction from Sebastian. It’s time for that few minutes later when Jeff gets to know who are men standing behind the door.

“Seb, sweetie. Hunter’s friends want to talk to you, is it okay?” he asks softly. Sebastian gets up and when he is about to leave the room, Nick stops his friend after exchanging slightly worried looks with Jeff. “How about some clothes?” he suggests gently, but in the end Nick is forced to choose those clothes because Sebastian just stares at his wardrobe like some unknown creature. 

“Should I offer something? There is fresh coffee and I think I bought some cookies.”

“No, they don’t need a thing. We can eat your cookies later."

They are three men in basic t-shirts and jeans. Strong arms, short hair, serious faces. They are his fiance's people, not Sebastian’s. Their empty comfort is useless to him, but they are allowed to talk anyway. Sebastian sits in his favourite armchair, Emmy resting on his lap. He finds it slightly amusing how uncomfortable those big men look on their small leather sofa. 

“So. You are telling you left him there without checking if he was truly dead. Did I understand right?” Sebastian knows he is mean. It’s a war situation and he can never understand no matter how many times Hunter had explained all about his life choices. It hadn’t ever been Sebastian favourite small talk topic, he had preferred distracting Hunter with his mouth or hand. Other young man had given in every time. 

“He saved me”, youngest of the men says suddenly. Sebastian raises his eyebrows. Guy looks like he isn’t even old enough to high school, so it’s not surprising he had fucked up something. “It was horrible. Everything was exploding, and I had lost my ability to move. Then Clarington came, he was calm like icicle and told me to run like my life would depend on it.”

 What the hell is he supposed to say? Should he be happy because Hunter had apparently given his life to his unknown kid? Then he remembers something and opens his mouth, smiling wickedly.

“You know. Hunter loved you guys. He was all the time babbling about it how you you wouldn’t ever leave a friend behind. But I guess it was just something he believed. He was sometimes so naive.” Sebastian wants to hurt as much as possible. He has so much pain, so it’s only right if someone else could carry part of it. 

It’s not possible to provoke them, of course not. They let his cold words die and leave few minutes later. Sebastian is absolutely numb, when he receives their pats on his back. ”Just call any of us if you ever need something. You were Clarington’s family and now you are our family." 

Sebastian reacts with action. Next morning he puts Emmy on a leash and catches really pissed-looking mr. Puss to his carrier. “I know you don’t like this, but you have always loved Jeff. He is probably going to spoil you”, he babbles. Everything has crashed down anyway, so Sebastian can also start talking to animals. It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t have much else left. 

Jeff had probably come straight from bed to answer the door. He is leaning against doorway, eyes bit hazy and smile lazy. But all of it fades when leash of a chihuahua and carrier containing annoyed Persian cat are pushed to him. His panic is real when Sebastian asks him to take care of their pets and turns around to leave – he is kinda in a hurry.

Or not. He is pulled back by determined hand and that force makes Sebastian stumble a little before he manages to find balance again.“I don’t care how annoying this is, but you owe me an explanation. Before that you aren’t leaving.” Jeff’s voice is truly distressed and Sebastian has to blink when he understands what his actions look like.

“I’m not going to do anything stupid. I promise, princess. I just have to get away. I don’t wanna think too much, that’s why I’m going so fast.” His friends sighs, looking not so convinced but he allows Sebastian to go. “Call me when you are... Wherever you are going. I want souvenirs. And postcards”, he yells making Sebastian wave his hand. He heard that, and Jeff would get best presents he could find. 

France is home, Sebastian decides. He hugs Stacey at the airport and his sister knows how to treat him on that moment of loss. They spend few days doing ordinary things, like having coffee at their favourite place. Owner still remembers Sebastian and his order but she hasn’t ever met Hunter, so it feels safe to be there.

But Stacey has also her own life, so of course everything gets worse. Sebastian is just wandering around. He is in the park, sipping wine and feeling miserable when some older guy stops beside him and asks what his price would be. He is just an ordinary man, maybe in his fifties. Ring finger has a light mark, and wedding ring is probably in the pocket of man’s neat, nice dress pants. After buying sex from hopeless boys he goes home to eat dinner with his wife and two nice, ordinary children. They have a house with small porch and a dog. One of the kids plays violin and other one plays football. He has such a perfect, average family and there he is, making all of it somehow dirty. 

“Stop living in the lie”, Sebastian just spits and walks away. Confused face of that man stays in his mind for few seconds, but he has enough to think about in his own problems. Sebastian should pull himself together because in the end nobody is doing it to him, there isn’t Hunter or Jeff or Stacey to fix things, it’s just about Sebastian’s ability to not become bigger mess than he already is. 

So he leaves France, it’s home but it’s not good for him right now. Sebastian chooses new country with dice and ends up in Norway.Tromsø fascinates him. Watching mountains around houses gives light feeling of claustrophobia, but Sebastian gets used to it. It’s also beautiful, scary and beautiful. Sometimes he drives on narrow streets during dawn, hoping he could paint mountains and shy pink that decorates them. 

He know it’s embarrassingly late, but during his first week in Norway Jeff's present is finally sent. It’s a heavy cardboard box full of all kind of interesting things he had been able to find.

When blond, young man gets the present, it makes him somehow sad. There is a letter in the box, several pages filled with Sebastian’s small, pedantic handwriting. “I don’t think he is coming back anytime soon.” Text on the paper is full of hope, looks like Sebastian has found new kind of path to follow.

Nick sits down behind him and wraps his arms around Jeff. “He lost so much. I think I would have done something similar in his situation. He is still our friend, my dear. Anything hasn’t changed.”

“Yeah. And now we can do a cool trip to Europe without any expensive hotel”, Jeff smiles sadly and turns around to kiss his boyfriend. 

Cats haven’t ever been Sebastians’s favourites but in his new home country he kinda falls in love with Norwegian forest cats. At first he gets one, Toby who is black gloomy-looking thing. But during cold nights he purrs next to Sebastian on the sofa. Presence of cat makes his house feel like home. After Toby comes Rocket, little kitten who makes older cat hiss before they accept each other. 

“Be nice. It’s just us three”, Sebastian warns animals in friendly tone. He misses Emmy and kinda also mr. Puss but when he skypes with Jeff, animals look totally happy. Both of his friends are kinda attached to them. 


	48. Meet me on the other side (kisses from Norway) (2/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He loses it. Immediately."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I said, lots of so called artistic freedom. I have for example totally bypassed the fact that people in Norway speak Norwegian, not English. I already mentioned it, but there is also that one sentence at the end which isn't mine. You will recognize it when you see it.

When his life is mostly organized, it’s time to find some new hobby to take all his attention. There is a note about new theater group between notes about lost cat and cooking club on the bulletin board of local library. He hadn’t ever thought about acting but it sounds like a good way to forget everything about himself. So next day Sebastian makes sure he is wearing comfortable clothes before leaving the house. There are water bottle, few apples, book and notebook in his bag besides usual stuff like his wallet.

He is warmly welcomed even though most of other people already know each other. Acting is okay, it's actually pretty good. Sebastian finds himself enjoying this new hobby and because evenings at the theater are usually long and tiring, he doesn't have energy to distressing thoughts or even worse, nightmares. Acting is good but when he gets a change to direct, that's something what makes his heart burn. He goes through few projects and suddenly everything is so much more official than before, when they are having a meeting at fanciest hotel of the town. That kind of places used to belong to his younger life, so Sebastian has no problems to look like he is at cosy environment. He accepts glass of water from young, blond woman and looks at man who had invited him. 

They want him to do a movie. Sebastian has no real merits couple of amateur projects and leading a show choir back in high school shouldn’t be enough, but there he is. Older man notices his hesitation and makes a big, passionate gesture with his hand. “We know you are potential. Young, foreigner, talented and deep. You have much to give, I’m sure about that. It’s not like we would be giving our most important project to you. This could be first step on great career.”

He does that movie and next one. In third project he is forced to work with another American, Kurt Hummel. They love and hate each other. Kurt finds his soft spot for Sebastian when he realizes their shared love for French. It's amusing to have lunch meetings and whole discussions in his favourite language. Unfortunately with Hummel comes his dream family, gorgeous husband Adam and their little daughter, Aria. Sebastian’s eyes hurt from preventing tears when he says hello to Adam and gives them his gift to little Aria, who has black hair and beautiful blue eyes. 

His third one would be shown at big film festival which could be step to even bigger things. There is talking about going to USA and Hollywood, but Sebastian tries to focus on other things. Going to USA sounds like a nightmare. He has a life in Norway, his job, his cats, his tiny blue house... On few evenings he has gone to local bars and talked to few people. Maybe some day he could have even love here. 

Because he is young director, still in the phase where proving himself is important, he is asked to talk with audience after every show. That's fine. Sebastian has his practiced speech, and after that he listens to questions. When someone knocks his shoulder, Sebastian turns around with a huge, polite smile glued on his face. People are fascinating, and it's wonderful to hear their thoughts about his work, but all of it can be pretty tiring too.

He loses it. Immediately. His mind gives up, because there is no logical explanation to a man standing in front of him. Something cold rubs his face, forcing his eyes open. They are still in the quiet auditorium. Someone has put their jacket under Sebastian's head, and his mentor is standing above him, looking very nervous. "Is everything okay?"

He dares to look at person who has taken care of him. Sebastian has spent so much time missing that face. Full lips, blue eyes, typical buzz cut. There is a cane lying on the floor next to them. Dark-haired man reaches out his hand and touches Hunter Clarington’s cheek with the back of it. His heart starts beating a lot faster, when Hunter takes his hand and kisses knuckles like he used to do.

But then reality hits him. Sebastian backs off, it has to be one more stupid day dream. Hunter is dead. It had taken months to accept that fact, there is no way he could be there today. Just vaguely he notices people watching them.

“Go away”, he snaps, trying to protect his vulnerable heart. “It can’t be you. You are gone. You left me even though you promised to come back.”

“Bas, please”, he pleads. 

Sebastian knows it’s paranoid but he has to make a question. “Tell something what only you and I know.” Hunter takes a moment to think about his answer, memories making him smile lightly.

“I proposed to you after Friday date. We ran from movie theater to our car. You were pissed because it was raining and you were soaked. It didn’t make you happier when you heard what I wanted to say. But that’s why I wanted to spend my life with you. Because it wasn’t about luxuries or fancy restaurants. It was about getting soaked in the rain and then going home together to snuggle up under blanket.

It’s real. Sebastian gets up, eyes glued to Hunter like he could disappear in any minute. “Did I have something more to do today?” he asks, and one of the assistants answers.

“Nothing what couldn’t be cancelled.”

“Do it then, please.”

They leave theater together. Sebastian notices how carefully Hunter walks and is about to offer his help, it’s kinda slippery in January. But other young man shakes his head. “I can handle it”, he promises. It’s in front of restaurant when Hunter almost falls on his ass, and Sebastian catches him. "I'm here", he mutters and blue-eyed man nods shortly.

"I know."

Hunger seems like an unknown problem but Sebastian orders some random food anyway. Hunter looks nervous when his fingers snap dark wood of the table. “I was injured and wrong guys found me. I’m not looking for your pity, but I almos died. It was impossible to even think about getting back before they bumped into other Americans. Without those dudes I wouldn’t be here.”

“I came home, spent some more time in hospital. It’s going to be okay but my leg needs time.

Hunter nibbles his pasta and Sebastian isn’t even sure what his own meal contains. It's surreal and he is getting a headache. Hunter's movements are slower than them used to be. Red shirt covers probably more scars than before but mostly he is same. Blueness of his eyes has familiar little sparkle Sebastian missed during lonely nights. 

“I had this photo. Do you want to see?” Sebastian isn’t sure about that but he nods anyway. It’s his own old school photo. He smiles in worn picture, eighteen summers, cocky, young and so in love.

“I don’t know what would have happened if they had found it. But that picture was my biggest motivation. That I could be sitting like this again one day. I didn’t know if you would have continued your life, but that idea, that dream kept me going.”

"How did you find me? I'm still skyping with Jeff but he doesn't really know much about my current life." Sebastian clears his throat, and takes a sip of his water.

"I came to Europe, spent some time in Germany and France. There was still article about this festival. They were introducing young, promising directors. Picture looked like you, but I couldn’t be sure. Also last name was different.”

"Maiden name of my mother."

Of course they end up in bed. Sebastian just wants so much, too much. It was always same with Hunter. His head wouldn’t be totally clear before that. It’s rushed, sweaty and horny. “Oh my fucking god, how’s your leg?” Sebastian remembers to ask after he has pushed Hunter to bed maybe bit too roughly.

“It’s fine, just come here and fuck me”, Hunter pants and Sebastian obeys. Skin under his teeth is painfully familiar, and biting makes Hunter gasp just like before. They still know how to move together. Sebastian marks that beautiful neck, admiring every whimper that escapes Hunter’s mouth.

Much later he has shower fresh, shirtless man on his bed. Like he imagined, Hunter has much more scars than Sebastian really remembers. Them are white and pink, and he still tastes tight skin on his lips. Kissing those marks had made tears appear in the corners of Hunter's eyes. "I know I'm not... I have so many marks. I'm not hot, I'm broken, and you are so fucking gorgeous and you are going to be big name..." Listening to that had made Sebastian simply stop everything. Pulling out had made Hunter whine almost pitifully, but there had been more important things than sexual satisfaction. He had cupped that familiar face, eyes full of pain, and kissed Hunter's jaw and collarbones until he had laughed, low and sweet.

"Stop that. I would prefer you unhurt, of course. You would have been safe all the time and this wouldn't have happened. But every mark on your body. Them are part of you. I'm not teenager anymore, my world is more than pretty faces and bodies."

Sebastian brings him water so other man can swallow his painkillers. Toby and Rocket are standing at the doorway, looking curious. Hunter is still perfect cat whisperer so it doesn’t take more than few moments before both of the are curled up against his sides. “We can’t do this”, Sebastian tells even though his heart is unbelievably heavy. He was serious about everything what was said, but situation is still complicated.

Hunter isn’t surprised. Maybe bit hurt, but not surprised. “I knew you would say something like that. Do you have a man here?” he asks, longing clear in his voice.

“I didn’t mean, Hunt. Fuck. I’m not going to kick you out. I just meant that a lot has happened. We can’t go straight back to old times.”

It's his turn now. Other man had chased him down, so Sebastian should decide about future. At the same time he is discussing about next, big movie project and having lunch dates with Kurt Hummel. He is still annoying as hell, but Kurt's talent is something rare and delicate. They could conquer whole world together, everyone is sure about that.

Sebastian has a solution to everything after signing the contract and deciding about his future. 

"Meet me there, babe." It's a decorative card showing address of tiny coffee house. That coffee house is on the beach, thousands of miles away. "In the end I wanna be standing at the beginning with you." Hunter's smile could compete with sun when he gets light kiss on his cheek. 


	49. Popcorn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was looking for AU-ideas and then [this](http://auseverywhere.tumblr.com/post/106962140312/adhdnoravalkyrie-consider-the-i-work-at-a) happened.

It’s first day when they are showing sixth Fast & Furious-film, so every single seat had been taken. Hunter hasn’t ever been biggest fan of this saga, he doesn’t really care about cars that much, and thinks Vin Diesel’s muscles are just exaggeration, but when credits are rolling, there is a huge grin on his face. Movie had left Hunter in peaceful state, he would like to curl up on one of those soft, red benches, but he has work to do.

Job at movie theater is better choice than those other options he had considered six months ago. Hunter sells tickets, and keeps an eye on potential troublemakers even though everything is usually blissfully easy. People coming to theater can be annoying and loud but they don’t mean anything bad. After last movie of the day he cleans worst mess and shuts down the lights for the night. Doing that couple of times every week doesn’t take too much time. Studies are his most important responsibility anyway.

Hunter has his routines, he starts picking up candy wrappers and curses quietly kids who haven’t been taught manners at home. Music is playing from his headphones, it’s new Rihanna-song, his most delicious guilty pleasure, so he isn’t paying attention to his environment.

That’s why long-legged figure in the back row scares the hell out of him. Hunter takes a step back, unable to believe that there really is some kind of creep in his damned theater. He takes headphones off, ready for an argument. But it’s not a creep, it’s a boy, about same age as Hunter.

”Hi, you should leave”, he tells, disliking his own, awkward voice. Hunter isn’t used to deal with this kind of gorgeous boys. Boy turns his head to take a look at Hunter, and it doesn’t ease his awkwardness when he sees watery, green eyes and wet face. Guy is tall, but he looks like a scared kid when he is holding popcorn bucket like a lifesaver.

He lets out an embarrassed laughter. ”Oh god, I’m sorry. You should get your work done, pretty face, and here I am, being typical difficult customer.” Most fascinating question is why traditional action movie had made this beautiful boy so upset. Of course Paul Walker’s accident had been horrible, but it can’t be about that anymore, Hunter thinks.

Sitting down is just a whim. Other boy stares at Hunter, accepting his company. ”You apparently want to know what the hell I’m doing”, he throws a smile, attractive, broad, relaxed. Even tears and snot can’t cover his natural handsomeness.

”It’s about my dad… We used to watch these movies together. We weren’t close at all, but there was at least something what we were able to talk about without arguing. He was really looking forward this one, but died last autumn.”

”I’m sorry”, Hunter offers his condolences clumsily.

They are quiet for a moment. Hunter is thinking about it how he should hurry with his work, and then also dark-haired boy next to him understands that he is still making Hunter’s evening bit difficult.

”Oh crap. I will go, I promise. I’m not normally any kind of crybaby, but this week or actually this whole month has been stressful, and then was this stuff with movie premiere.”

Except Hunter doesn’t really want to see him go without even getting to know his name. Words come out too quickly, them get mixed with each other and Hunter can see exact moment when beautiful boy understands his question.

”I’d love to, gorgeous. Give me your number and I’ll text you.” Hunter is probably scarlet red when he types his phone number in other guy’s phone.

”Nice to meet you, Hunter. My name is Sebastian”, other boy tells before leaving. Voice is much more lively than few minutes ago. It’s probably just his hopeful imagination, but looks like those clearly talented hips would follow some private rhythm. Sight is very pleasant anyway.

 


	50. April Fools' Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw several posts about bad pranks for April Fool's Day and suddenly this little thing was born. One-sided and unhappy Huntbastian.

They are quite good buddies with Sebastian Smythe. They share similar kind of not so gentle humour and are leading the Warblers more or less together. Sebastian simply gets him and Hunter gets his friend. It's one of easiest things he has in his life. So Hunter isn't sure what kind of inner demon makes him to do it. After all he has always been a good kid. Maybe he has some less appropriate acts under his belt, but he isn't complete ass, Hunter has always known when things have gone too far.

So he definitely shouldn't be asking Smythe to a date. It's a jerk move to do, of course. But there Hunter is, explaining something about Friday night and a movie. He really thinks that Sebastian would throw it away as a joke it is, but of course he can't have that kind of luck. Smile spreading on other boy's face is honest and real. It's so dashing and surprising that Hunter freezes, doesn't react soon enough and lets other boy leave.

Before seeing his calendar Sebastian doesn't understand it. Usually his feet are staying on the ground without problems, but that question from Hunter had been so surprising, so lovely and wonderful that Sebastian had allowed himself to dream. It hadn't been a good idea. Calendar page beneath picture of sexy firefighter shows old date, last day of March. It's a fucking April Fool's Day. He had been a victim of cruelest possible prank.

It's dark in his dorm room. Unfinished homework is lying on the desk and laptop is playing slow, quiet music. He is sitting on the bed, feeling like a complete shit, when door is suddenly thrown open. Hunter has barely time get to his feet before Jeff's hand is there. Slap is sharp, painful when it sends white flashes through his whole body. But blond boy isn't planning to stop there, he is trying to throw punches, hurt whatever part of Hunter he can reach. Jeff doesn't have technique or strength, but he is fast and fierce.

Old skills take control of Hunter's body, it's like being at academy again. Only moments later he is holding Jeff Sterling down. Keeping him there would quite easy, and other boy realizes it too. He is trying to calm down, body getting more and more relaxed because there is nothing he can do.

”You asshole”, Jeff spits when they are getting up. ”You fucking asshole. Was it really necessary? He was already thinking that he couldn't get anything nice, and then you have to polish your ego by crushing him.”

It ends with a bloody nose, Jeff is just so full of pure rage, it has to get out somehow because usually gentle boy isn't used to those feelings. He isn't able to leave Hunter untouched.

”I just... I didn't think”, Hunter defends himself weakly. There are no excuses.

”Wonderful. Hopefully you are proud of this little stunt. That one time when you decide not to think about your acts, you end up hurting one of those people who have had difficult enough times without you.”

Hunter has seen people being uncomfortable around him, but it's nothing compared to next morning's Sebastian. Every muscle in his body seems to be tense when dark-haired boy says his good morning and tells Hunter to fuck off just with his eyes.

"I'm sorry", he tries. Sebastian had been a friend and Hunter had miscalculated worse than ever, but maybe he could fix even something.

"Shut up." He speaks in low volume, doesn't want Warblers to notice anything. "One more word and your nose will be broken. I hit harder than Jeff."


	51. Fire (Ice)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "imagining your otp doing the forehead touch is literally the most important thing in the whole world. everybody take a second and stop scrolling and imagine your otp doing the forehead touch. okay. you can move on now."
> 
> Original post [here](http://m-azing.tumblr.com/post/86453506797/imagining-your-otp-doing-the-forehead-touch-is).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I have kinda saved this to be my fic number 50 and also my personal birthday fic. Of course my birthday ended an hour ago, but you get the idea.

Sebastian is losing his temper. He wants to do this, yes, there are no doubts about it. But when he is shaking on the bathroom floor, his mouth tasting bitter because of throwing up, he knows there is one thing he needs or Sebastian Smythe is ditching his own wedding.

Getting up happens really slowly. Balance is hopelessly missing, and brushing his teeth with shaky hands – third time during same morning – is an interesting experience, but it's not totally impossible. He washes his face again and gets out feeling even a bit fresher. 

Jeff is waiting there, looking unfairly gorgeous in his black tux, turquoise shirt giving an interesting twist to whole thing. Blond, young man had been Sebastian's support previous night when he had clutched Hunter like a baby koala his mom. Lips had touched his cheek, and then Hunter had gone to spend last night before wedding with his own buddies, three childhood friends from Colorado. Sebastian had said hello shortly, and now he has an impression that getting along with Hunter's people wouldn't be any kind of problem.

”Get Hunter here”, Sebastian pants angrily because he shouldn't have given up only thing that can keep him calm. Hunter can be hot-heated too, but most of the time he is ice for Sebastian's fire. That's why they complete each other.

”Sebastian, sweetie. You know it's bad luck to see him beforehand”, Jeff gives frustratingly familiar words, but now Sebastian would fight. Hunter and him have seen so much together, one stupid tradition wouldn't effect their happiness.

 ”I don't give a fuck. Get Hunter or you are going to explain everybody why I'm not getting married today. Are you really ready to face Stacey's reaction? Finding a perfect dress took three months.” Jeff gulps. Stacey Smythe is even more hot-headed than her precious brother, and dealing with tiny brunette's annoyance had been an experience Jeff doesn't want to repeat. He hurries to do as he was told. 

Getting to dark bedroom seems to take all Sebastian's willpower and energy. He lies there, miserable human being missing his soon-to-be-husband. Tears tickle in his eyes but Sebastian wouldn't end up crying. Hunter would be there soon enough, and then everything would be rational again. With Hunter by his side world wouldn't be scary anymore. 

”You are behaving like a pregnant woman”, relaxed voice tells from the doorway. Sebastian had been napping lightly, dreaming of their next day's flight to unknown destination. Hunter had planned their trip, two weeks together without responsibilities or curious friends and relatives. They would have all the time just to enjoy each other's company and have amazing sex.

”Luckily we'll get married before baby. My parents wouldn't like it otherwise.”

Sassy attitude is gone when Hunter understands that his other half is really upset. ”I'm sorry, baby”, he murmurs, comes closer and sits down beside Sebastian. There is a strong arm supporting his movements when Sebastian gets up tentatively. 

His fiancé offers his closeness, presses their foreheads together and just holds Sebastian as close as possible. Dark-haired man focuses on his breathing, inhales Hunter's scent, and makes that confidence his own. Other man has so much to give, he isn't afraid of Sebastian being greedy for it.

”You know, we can still cancel whole thing. I would be honored to call you my husband, but it's everything what we already have. If this truly makes you so distressed it's not worth it.”

”Do you remember when we first met?” Of course Sebastian remembers. New boy with broad shoulders and tight smile, desperately faking all that confidence.

”You were so out and proud. I hated you and it. I think I also loved you immediately.”

Finger's comb Sebastian's shiny hair over and over again. Hunter would wait. If it was needed, Hunter wouldn't care about being late from his own wedding. Closeness is tickling, almost electric. In that room is everything he has ever craved. A kiss on his forehead makes him feel wanted and loved. In the end wedding isn't really big deal. Sebastian could faint in front of all their friends and family embarassing both of them, but Hunter could handle it. He would still love Sebastian more than anything. There is no need to impress, they aren't eighteen anymore.

It would be tempting just go and get whole thing done, but it's a fact that there is at least 45 minutes left before leaving would be even almost wise. Hunter makes him another breakfast, just toast and juice. " _Can your stomach handle it, beautiful?" _  
__

Sebastian can handle everything when Hunter is there. They sit together, Sebastian's hand resting on the table and Hunter's own holding it. When really sheepish-looking Jeff opens the door and steps into apartment, he is ready to go.

”I'm sorry sweetie”, his best friend mumbles, arm around Sebastian's waist. He gets a kiss on his cheek. ”I just want your day to be perfect.” An apology is accepted, denying it is out of question.

”I'm ready now.”


	52. 36 months

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration behind this [here](http://brightsummernights7cf.tumblr.com/post/115842832725/otpprompts-imagine-person-a-lightly-tracing-i#permalink-notes).

It has been three years. 36 months, 156 weeks, 1095 days. Sebastian sighs happily and snuggles closer, being grateful for Hunter’s body heat next to him. Maybe he is greedy, just a little bit needy. That doesn’t mean he couldn’t handle sleeping alone, it’s just much more comfortable when Hunter is there, always ready to cuddle in his sleep.

Suddenly sleep has escaped too far. He just lies there, watching moon – Hunter had forgotten to close the curtains, and listens his boyfriend sleeping. His back looks smooth and tempting in dim light. Kissing his skin would be a simple invitation, but Sebastian isn't in the mood, he is too drowsy for fucking. 

 _I love you._ Over and over again he writes it on Hunter's back with his index finger. It hasn’t been said aloud yet. Hunter is so good because he understands their dynamics. Hunter doesn’t try to chain him with too complicated demands or promises, and gets adoring boyfriend with unbreakable loyalty in return. 

It had been half a year before Hunter was introduced to Stacey Smythe. He was first guy ever to get that honor. Tiny brunette glared at him, suspicious because of her brother, soft green eyes full of judging. Her dark make-up enhanced threatening impression. Hunter was almost ready to run when they were left alone, it felt like he couldn’t ever be good enough. But after few embarrassing comments and questions Stacey’s face softened. “I guess I can tolerate you. I have seen the way how he looks at you. Take care of my brother, that’s all I ask.”

After fourteen months Sebastian finally told he didn’t want kids. They could get a dog, another cat, or anything Hunter would want, but it would be just him and Sebastian in their small apartment, where books and magazines cover tables and desks, and baby would probably get lost in the middle of mess when Sebastian has one of his inspiration days going on. Hunter nodded. He didn't see a reason to end their thing. 

21 months in a relationship and Sebastian almost did something stupid. He was feeling reckless, suddenly pressured by whole idea of being committed to one person. Eyes were glued to him when he danced at club, colourful lights almost blinding his eyes and bodies moving against his. There were whispers and questions, but image of Hunter's face was bright in his mind. He returned home and offered Hunter smoky kisses. There was a question in his blue eyes, but desperation made an answer clear. Hunter took his own, and they didn't return to those hours after that night. 

When calendar had passed 32 months, Hunter’s mom asked when he was going to buy a ring to that “boy”. Hunter gagged, that question was such a surprise because he had always thought his parents didn’t appreciate their relationship even though Sebastian was always treated politely in their household. “We would have time to organize wedding for next summer”, his well-meaning mom tried to suggest, but Hunter told no without thinking twice. He didn’t want to guess how Sebastian would have reacted to idea of wedding.

Sebastian is drifting to sleep, his hand still on Hunter’s waist. Other body is stiff, not soft from sleep anymore. Hunter is feeling little anxious, he had almost ruined it by asking what the hell Sebastian was doing at three am. Instead of getting annoyed he had focused on those tiny, light movements.

I love you. It’s big, not anything he could ignore. Some other people could drop those words to stranger in the moment of kindness. Sebastian wouldn’t. He has showed his feelings in several ways during their three years relationship. When Hunter got restless, had no idea what to do with his life, Sebastian paid them a trip to Europe. They wandered in churches and castles, got soaked in the rain of London and sent funny map cards to their siblings. Trip didn’t offer answers, but if gave him new kind of peace of mind.

Thinking about it too much would make Hunter back off. Now he just does it, catches Sebastian in his embrace and returns those words without fear or worries. Only reaction is sleepy mumbling that isn’t logical at all, there is something about potatoes and cheese. Hunter tries again, and now it’s clear he had been heard.

Sebastian's fingers find his wrist. For seconds that makes Hunter scared, after everything those three words can’t make Sebastian run. Hunter isn't pushed away.

“Hold me”, Sebastian demands weakly, voice much softer than usually, full of thick emotion.

 Hunter doesn’t ask questions. He tightens his grip, presses their bodies together and just then just lies there with his boyfriend whose thoughts he still has difficulties to understand. Sebastian’s head is his own place, but he is still so dear for Hunter.


	53. Am I right or is it all in my head?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe. I started with ninth idea on this [post](http://brightsummernights7cf.tumblr.com/post/116750400745/aus-id-love-to-see#permalink-notes), and then this whole fic started it's own, rebellious life.
> 
> Title borrowed from R5.

Life in general may slightly boring. Hunter gets up every morning at five am and starts his day by running five miles or visiting the gym. Then he takes a quick shower before grabbing his work clothes and hurrying to office. Even breakfast is same at least five times a week, and horrible things would happen if he didn’t get his morning coffee in same blue mug. On Fridays he eats chocolate bar feeling restless and longing something undefined.

Guys from the office think that something undefined would be hot girlfriend with long hair and great boobs. He always passes those comments with a light smile without telling that boobs are one of last things in his mind. Women are great as friends but Hunter hasn’t dated one since high school. Sometimes he plays with idea of telling guys about his faceless lovers who have muscled backs and tickling stubble. Of course there wouldn’t be so tender words then, Hunter would just say that he likes cock, not boobs. He is pretty sure they could be accepting, it’s modern world after all, and all of them are sophisticated, educated, and just very aware about things outside their own bubble.

So he has his exercising and his job. Guys at the office are great even though they aren’t really close friends. His little apartment is shared only with his cat Artemis, but Hunter likes that place, even though most interesting thing he can see from his kitchen window is an apartment in next building. It has been quiet and uninhabited for some time now.

It’s quiet Sunday morning when Hunter returns from jog, his face red from exercising and light layer of sweat on his forehead. There is an expensive-looking car with a trailer outside of other building. Hunter leans against the wall, pretends to be focused on his newspaper even though paper bag with bagels tells he had planned nice breakfast moment in his apartment, not outdoors where it’s still cold.

But he is curious.

After few minutes of observing he knows bit more. Person who is moving to that building is a guy with fluffy, brown hair and long legs. He looks amazing in tight, ass-hugging jeans and leather jacket. Jacket is open, shows nice chest covered in a shirt with Superman logo.

Then Hunter is noticed. He is watching guy, enjoying the passionate and lively way brunette talks to his friends who are helping him to move his stuff. Bright, green eyes staring at him make him shy, unsure about his whole appearance. Then other guy grins and winks. Apparently he didn’t find Hunter’s curious looks bothering.

Hunter just leaves, it’s embarrassing enough for one day, and actually talking to guy would surely lead him to say something sugary and stupid like “Nice shirt, but it would look so much nicer on my bedroom floor.”

When door is closed safely behind him, Hunter slides to the floor, his heart beating furiously and hands sweaty. His white Persian cat comes to check what is wrong, but he meows disapprovingly when Hunter has no energy to give his attention to cat. 

 Whole thing is weird. He isn’t blushing teenager virgin, one attractive guy shouldn’t have so strong effect on him. Hunter shudders, maybe it has just been too long without getting laid. 

They see again next morning. Hunter is about fifteen minutes late from his usual schedule and when he opens the door, dark-haired guy is already there, taking his attention with bright orange sneakers and grumpy face. Hunter nods, but apparently taller man is in too bad mood and sleepy to recognize him from previous day. They leave to opposite directions, Hunter choosing his usual favourite route.

Weeks pass and Hunter learns new things. Guy from next building doesn’t seem to own curtains or if he owns, he hasn’t bothered to hang them. When Hunter is home, he is usually relaxed in tank top and sweatpants, his feet bare. But other guy seems to have some serious issues with clothes. He spends a lot of time in his living room, Hunter can see him sitting on the sofa, talking on the phone and watching tv. Usually shirtless. He has to know about Hunter's curious, careful eyes. It's just too difficult not to steal glimpses of his life. It's so different than Hunter's. There are people coming and going, sometimes he has parties, and next morning he can be seen sitting in the living room with thoughtful face and pizza box. One-night stands make Hunter almost jealous. 

Then things change. Hunter has returned from Sunday jog, is standing in his kitchen only a towel covering his body. He is nibbling a croissant, gaze unfocused, mind wandering in work things even though he should relax because it’s Sunday, his favourite day of the week.

Movement takes his attention. Brunette guy waves his hand, smiling happily. He is so different than Hunter or anything in his life. There begins their life as window buddies. It’s ridiculous but enjoyable, most entertaining thing Hunter has done for a long time. At first he shows his cat. Artemis wiggles, tries to climb to his shoulders, and other guy laughs deliciously. He brings a huge cage to living room and yeah, there is something fast and tiny in the palm of his hand. Maybe guinea pig or hamster. Showing jersey of his favourite ice hockey team makes him almost shy, with his typical luck his hot window buddy would support some totally impossible team. Other guy looks at it with a delighted smile on his handsome face. Few minutes later exactly similar jersey is showed to Hunter. 

It’s  rare Friday evening because his window buddy is staying home with some junk food. Hunter grabs a beer bottle from his fridge and makes few hesitant dance moves. Other guy seems to understand what his plan is, but it would be cancelled in a heartbeat if it meant an invitation to eat a slice of pizza.

His name is Kurt. Dancer’s body is light and flexible in Hunter’s arms. Hunter doesn’t want him. Or he wants. But just wet mouth and tightness around his cock, bruising fingers and little kitten moans. He is beautiful and deserves so much more than Hunter can or wants to give. That’s why he was hesitant when Kurt suggested leaving at the club. “Are you sure?” he breathed in other’s man ear. Kurt shivered, but nodded.

“I know rules, Hunter. I’m a big boy.”

 Other apartment is completely dark, but he is still fantasizing, imagines how that brown-haired guy would look on his knees in front of Hunter. Sweet and sexy Kurt doesn’t care that Hunter is absent-minded as long as he still gets what he want and doesn’t hear wrong names when they fall to bed.  

“Can I leave my number? This is a great way to get rid of stress”, Kurt suggests afterwards. Hunter is still in messy bed, drowsy and kinda happy, but other man is already buttoning his shirt. Kurt wouldn’t stay for breakfast but that’s not a problem for him. Regular booty-call could be exactly what he needs to his life right now.

Kurt scribbles his number to a notebook on Hunter’s night desk and then he is gone.

It’s a miserable Saturday evening. Hunter is curled up on the sofa, resting under thick blankets. His nose feels uncomfortable because of flu. On days like this he just wishes there would be somebody taking care of him. Somebody who would make hot chocolate and sit next to him on the sofa, watching same old action movies he has seen dozens of times.  

Massive sneeze almost covers sound of doorbell. He wobbles to the door, messy and sweaty ball in his blanket. He has probably fever, so unreal everything feels. After opening door Hunter sneezes again, but luckily not towards the person who wanted to see him. It’s sexy, hot, beautiful, gorgeous guy from next building. He is dressed in soft-looking, relaxed clothes, just a hoodie and worn jeans. “Beer? Snacks? Ice hockey?” other man suggests like it would be most natural thing in the world. “And btw, my name is Sebastian.”

Hunter stares, blinks slowly, painfully. Then he finds a solution. It has to be a hallucination. He is apparently way more sick than he originally thought. So he just slams door shut and decides to have a nap.

Sebastian sighs but finds some more patience. He tries doorbell again and this time he pushes himself inside. “You are smoking hot. And I don’t mean that in sexy way”, he tells less politely, putting beer down with a snort. Cold hand touches Hunter’s sweaty forehead gently. 

In the end they don’t watch ice hockey. Hunter is so sick that he couldn’t separate home team from rivals. Sebastian stays with him, makes soup and gets painkillers from pharmacy. It's weird but also somehow comfortable to move in Hunter's apartment. He becomes friends with Artemis after offering some tuna. Sebastian wanders in small rooms, learning things about his patient. Hunter seems to be lonely. Maybe, just maybe he truly needs and wants this. 

When he wakes up on third day, his head is finally clear from dark fog. Hunter gets out of bedroom, sighing at cosy sight in his kitchen. Sebastian has newspaper and fresh coffee in front of him, Artemis purring in his lap.

“Good morning, gorgeous.”

He is probably far from gorgeous right now. Long, hot shower wouldn’t be bad, but Hunter still blushes and doesn’t dare to look at other man. “What was it?” he asks, when brief teenager virgin-thing is over.

“Don’t get me wrong. You have been mysterious and super hot, but I want something real. Much more than glimpses and moments and longing looks. You were doing nothing so I decided to get this really started.”

 _So I'm coming over, I hope it's alright_  
_Listen for me pulling into your drive_  
_Look out your window—you'll see my lights_  
_Baby girl, I gotta see you tonigh_ t

Scotty McCreery - See you tonight


	54. Like Bonnie and Clyde (1/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hunter Clarington may be crazier than Edward Cullen and Voldemort together, but he is pretty and sexy and Sebastian has a reputation to keep up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Criminals-AU was a pure joke. Something I laughed at in my head. But then was Brantley Gilbert's Bottoms Up, and me wandering in my city, thinking about this fic. 500, 2400, 3000 words later it wasn't joke anymore.
> 
>  ATTENTION
> 
> Now hopefully everybody is reading this. I just wanted to tell that Like Bonnie and Clyde is different compared to my usual stuff. It's slightly twisted, dark and not absolutely healthy. On the other hand I have personally read dozens of darker fics, so I don't know how to warn about this text. Fantasies about violence and mentions of school shootings. Characters who aren't exactly sane. Just remember that this isn't one of my typical fluffy things.

***

Looks like Sebastian is only one who can see what has been brought to usually peaceful Dalton Academy. Adults praising Hunter Clarington didn't see what Sebastian saw when he looked in those sea eyes. There was whole typical, humble “charming and perfect young man”-thing, but behind that Sebastian noticed glimpse of pure madness. Maybe something went wrong at his old school or possibly Hunter Clarington has always been like that.

But he is potentially dangerous, that kind of guy who could take a handgun to class and slaughter half of his classmates. Sebastian sits there in his armchair, surrounded by friendly chatter and knows he shouldn’t be so fascinated by intensity that carries name of Hunter. Hand is put on his shoulder and brunette startles violently.

“Your name was Sebastian, right? They just told me I’m going to share your room.”

Excellent. Sebastian hasn’t ever showed his real feelings easily, so it’s not difficult to hide how tense Hunter makes him. Other boy passes Sebastian’s chair and sits across him, on the other side of small glass table. That gaze is again there. Just minutes ago he had been an ordinary high school boy, having boring small talk with teachers, but now Sebastian is sure he hasn’t ever met anybody more dangerous.

“I’m sure it’s going to be interesting”, Sebastian smiles politely, he is almost flirting. Hunter Clarington may be crazier than Edward Cullen and Voldemort together, but he is pretty and sexy and Sebastian has a reputation to keep up. 

Hunter is quite easy roommate. His own half of the room is tidy, but he doesn’t complain about Sebastian’s messier habits. Hunter simply couldn’t care less, he has more interesting things in his mind. Like cardboard boxes under his carefully made bed. He is often examining them when Sebastian steps into room, and dark-haired boy is pretty sure it’s very visible attempt to rouse his curiosity.

Naturally it works. It’s possible that it’s not healthiest thing he has been interested in, but nothing stops him from peeking in the boxes when Hunter is safely stuck in study group. 

Sebastian is dull, not surprised. First box is full of all kind of knives. Sebastian has usually seen knives only in kitchen, but he is absolutely sure his roommate uses them for some other activity than chopping carrots. In other box he finds guns. Them are in perfect order, like books on Hunter’s desk. Touching cool steel makes Sebastian slightly nauseous. He has some shooting experience, because her mom thought it was a good hobby for sophisticated boy, but it’s different to see weapons there, in his own damned Dalton room, where his psycho roommate has hidden them.  

Reporting him would be right thing to do. They could get Hunter’s toxic personality out and probably save whole school from massive catastrophe. But Sebastian takes one of the guns in his hand and knows it’s not going to happen. Maybe someone else is going to find out, he doesn’t know that, but Sebastian won’t do it. 

Gun is heavy on his thigh and he could just go out and kill... How many? He isn’t sure about that, but probably quite many before they would disarm him. Football team is running laps on the track, totally unprepared for mass murder. Sebastian has nothing against those guys, it’s just fascinating idea. 

“I knew you had the potential.” His voice is almost lazy. Sebastian is like a trapped animal when he realizes his roommate is between him and door. He gets on his feet, wants to defend himself. But it’s only first reaction, seeing Hunter’s thoughtful face makes everything look different. Other boy isn’t really scary. His presence makes Sebastian shiver but at least half of it is nerves because of something he can’t truly handle or understand. But he wants more. So much more.

Hunter takes the gun and puts it back in cardboard box. “Do you want to learn?”

Sebastian shrugs, is about to start a sentence, but he is already cut off before that.

“I’m sure you know. Boys like you always know something, but most of them don’t have right sparkle. You have.”

His aunt, dear Cecilia is usually in Europe so her house is empty. There they can practice far from Dalton's curious boys. Sebastian isn't pure beginner, but it’s different world with Hunter. More serious. They change into sweatpants and t-shirts so Sebastian can get tips for hand-to-hand combat. 

Taking Hunter down for the first time makes him childishly proud. After kicking two knives away Sebastian straddles Hunter's upper body. Other boy doesn’t defend himself when his hands are held on the floor. He could escape so easily but Hunter’s jaw is more relaxed than for weeks. Maybe he isn't willing to go, perhaps other boy enjoys feeling Sebastian’s lanky body on top of him. 

When kiss happens, it’s just a light, fast brush of lips. Touch barely meets Hunter’s mouth, and Sebastian is so unsure, licks dust from his own lips. There is no need to be nervous, hand is put to his neck and Hunter uses his strength against Sebastian. 

He should probably feel used because no permissions are asked when his pants are pulled down. But he is just hopelessly turned on, when Hunter manhandles his poor body and takes Sebastian there, on the hard, cold floor. Hunter is big inside him and spit as their only lube it’s not easy. Maybe it’s pathetic how he would take anything what Hunter would be ready to give. 

But afterwards, when Sebastian is trying to take control of his breathing, there is a hand which helps him to bathroom for nice, warm shower. They stand there, all sexual tension gone, now it’s just wandering, slow fingers and wet kisses. “You are good, Smythe.”

It’s not about his sexual abilities, but something deeper. Looks like Sebastian has managed to prove himself in Hunter’s eyes.

For outsiders everything is still pretty similar. Sebastian studies, not caring about empty autumn in front of him. They are inseparable with Hunter, spending most of the time side by side. His mom and sister would have a word or two about it, because Sebastian doesn’t even see anybody else, but luckily they aren’t at Dalton. Teachers don’t care because they are getting rid of them in few weeks. Time is shorter and shorter in his calendar.

But he is forced to meet Stacey before graduation. His twin sister is heading to their place in Paris for whole summer and because Sebastian would go to a “road trip” with Hunter, she wants to have some quality time with her brother before summer. 

Sebastian tries his best so Stacey would leave her idea about meeting Hunter, but it’s futile. His twin sister is only person who can compete and win Sebastian in purest Smythe stubbornness. Sebastian has chosen bunch of different lies. “Hunter has his grandma’s funeral in Florida. He isn’t at Dalton this week.” Finally Stacey simply asks when Hunter would be at Dalton, so her suggestion can’t be ignored anymore. 

Hunter has his “perfect gentleman”-thing on, and in theory Stacey should be flattered when Hunter offers his arm to brunette girl during a walk near Dalton. But she isn’t. Even their gentle kiss she watches like it would be something disgusting. 

“I don’t like that guy”, she confesses quietly later, lean fingers playing with her silver bracelets. Stacey blows to her coffee before taking a sip. “Are you really sure about him? You could have asked Jeff out. He is such a sweetie.”

“It would be better if you asked Jeff on a date. He is straight, sis. It doesn’t look like that all the time, but he likes girls.” 

He hugs Stacey, smelling her perfume – flowers and vanilla – and is just so happy that everything is clear between them. There are no mean words or unsolved tensions. “I’m going to miss you”, Sebastian mutters and that’s not good, because they don’t usually say those things aloud. Stacey is suddenly watching him closely, her green eyes full of worry.

“What is it, Seb? Is there really something wrong with that guy? I knew he wasn’t good. Get him here and I’m going to kick his ass.” Sebastian doesn’t doubt that when he looks at those ridiculous things Stacey calls shoes. It’s a miracle how she can walk in so high heels. 

Upcoming graduation isn’t good for Hunter’s nerves. They are resting in his bed, Hunter’s possessive arm around other boy’s waist and his leg between Sebastian’s. His skin is sore from bite marks but there is peace inside him. Sebastian pushes against broader boy, making Hunter sniff. 

“You don’t have to do this, you know that, right? I’m not going to blame if you don’t want to continue this journey with me.” But Sebastian wants. He wants roughness, hard kisses and smell of gunpowder. 


	55. Today I want to turn your skies from gray to blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hm... Few things, I guess. I read porn. Lots of porn and all kind of porn, there are only few things I avoid like plague. Actual writing has been left to people who have ability to do it. D/S-fanfiction kinda fascinates me, but on the other hand sub Sebastian is right after Seblaine-ship most horrible thing I have ever seen in this fandom. There isn't enough sub Hunter, so here is it, new experiment once again. As you can guess, light dom/sub, but no porn.

Usually Hunter can resist doms. It's not easy but he has practiced years and is honestly proud of the result. He keeps his straight posture and steady appearance even though his inner sub is screaming, hoping just a change to kneel and give control to some other hands. It's not healthy or natural. He is a submissive person. Chaining his instincts isn't wise but he is already big enough joke in his own family.

Then he sees that dom. Meeting dark eyes asks almost more bravery than Hunter has ever possessed. Dark-haired boy licks his lips, Hunter is waiting for inappropriate wink or comment which would immediately question his power in choir room, but there is only little, kind smile. That looks weird on charming face, so he reminds himself that affording easy trust is impossible. He is already on thin enough ice.

Warm and longing energy is there tickling Sebastian's nerves long before they actually see new boy. He takes attention immediately when door of choir room is opened. Hunter carries himself like one of strongest doms, but his real identity has to be clear to every boy in the room. They don't see humble eyes or bowed head, Hunter's posture is flawless when he starts practiced speech eyeing them critically. He has a strong voice, filling room by singing or only speaking is easy for him. 

Hunter is all the time playing with his bracelet. It's a simple and boyish thing, leather and silver together. If it was any other sub, Sebastian would take it as a symbol of a claim. He would imagine beautiful dominant with deep voice and even deeper eyes, but now he is absolutely sure that Hunter is mostly alone in the world.

Sebastian is called to dean's office straight after rehearsal. Usually doms and subs aren't sharing dorm rooms, but right now they don't have space for Hunter without some organizing. ”You have miscalculated mr. Smythe, but you have still good record among your schoolmates. Can we trust you with mr. Clarington?” His word is given. Sebastian may have some questionable hobbies, but harassing unwilling subs isn't one of them.

Hunter's whole sad act causes an ache in Sebastian's heart when he follows other boy's life closely. They aren't talking a lot, ”good morning” and ”good night” are their most typical comments. On one evening Hunter is struggling with his French homework. Sebastian doesn't dare to say a word – other boy wouldn't probably take it well, but when Hunter is doing everything except paying attention to his textbook, Sebastian gets some extra braveness.

”You don't have a lot to do. Just start it. I have heard you speaking French, there is potential.” There is a light shade of dominance in his voice. Hunter freezes, he has clearly spent too long time without orders. ”Thanks”, he replies shortly and after that pen is writing foreigner words without problems.

He tries so much. Hunter does things that aren't typical for a sub. He isn't afraid to tell his opinions in sports, and is a physical player. Tackling doesn't scare him if it's needed. Leading the Warblers is exhausting for him, it's against Hunter's most basic nature to be that person who gets to hear all little worries and complaints. He isn't right person to solve all their dramas, but his inner strength is unbelievable. Sebastian adores other boy because of that.

”Can I help you?” He finally wants to know. Other boy's face is upside down, he is resting on the bed, legs against wall. Hunter rolls over and collects himself to a sitting position. "What?" he replies softly.

Sebastian explains, is careful with his words. He doesn't want to push this issue, Hunter could leave or take it, it's not Sebastian who should decide that. Captain of the Warblers isn't convinced after his words have died in the air.

”You don't know a thing about it. It's so easy for you. You have no idea how it feels to try so much and get laughter in return. Every day I fight to gain even a little control even though control itself scares me more than anything.”

His dom side reacts to Hunter's anxiety. There is a want, maybe even a need inside of him to comfort and cuddle other boy. It's not new for Hunter, they have some kind of understanding about each other and because of that specialty they could be so good together if Hunter just allowed it to happen.

”I have dreams and goals like everyone else. Maybe them are stupid and achieving them is not going to happen, but at least I have been more than naked and collared boy toy.”

Hunter's idea of submission and dominance is brutal and old-fashioned, but Sebastian knows his attempt to change it right now would be turned down. In his eyes there isn't a reason to trust Sebastian.

Few weeks later pure desperation takes a place of that reason. Sebastian returns to their dorm after long and tiring school day, his face as a clone of Grumpy Cat. School day had been bad enough,but after that slow torture he had spent two glorious hours on muddy and wet track, yelling of their merciless coach giving extra speed to all boys.

Sight in their room surprises him. Hunter is clearly far from comfortable on his knees. There are two reasons for that. He isn't used to kneeling, and it has been way too long in that same position without moving a muscle.

Sebastian snaps his fingers. ”Get here, beautiful.” Hunter doesn't know what to do with his body, he is about to kneel again but that's not what brunette beside him wants. ”Just lie down. I'm not touching you right now, and I'm always asking your permission. Relax babe. I got you.”

”I can't stop thinking about your offer. And I guess... It all escalated today, I got in a fight.”

”What kind of fight?” Sebastian's voice is neutral.

”Some of the boys said that I should learn to know my place, and he would be happy to teach me."

His dom side growls, Sebastian wants to teach that unknown guy how to treat most pure and beautiful soul he knows.

"Don't believe him, gorgeous. You can be whatever you want. Nobody can decide it for you. I could help you."

"I don't... I haven't ever. Are you going to hurt me?"

"I'm not going to do anything you don't want to happen. Your rules, your life, your needs." Sebastian's mind is full of arousing pictures. It would take only few moments. He would unbutton Hunter's jeans and take his penis in his mouth. Other boy would become broken, wonderful mess and Sebastian could fix all fears in his mind. Green eyes studying Hunter's body from head to toes tell him that Hunter is hard. He is tempted but scared and Sebastian should make it good for him.

"I can make my own rules", Hunter mumbles, his lips brushing Sebastian's cheek. He is testing it, trying to decide if letting go and allowing his sub to lead would be good thing to do. Sebastian stays still. It has to be his decision, Hunter's mind and body would probably give in if Sebastian decided to take what he wants so badly but that would be wrong. Unforgivable. 

"Give it to me", Hunter whispers. 

Sebastian hasn't ever been more understanding or gentle with anybody. ”Stay still. Let me take care of you”, he breathes against Hunter's lips and can feel how other body relaxes. He doesn't move or moan – Hunter's head is very peaceful place right now, and after slow love-making Sebastian helps other boy up. Offering a water bottle earns him quiet thanks. 

He looks calmer. Empty gaze is gone, Hunter is once again that controlled boy Sebastian had first met. ”Unbelievable”, he sighes after several minutes. Sebastian collects teardrops from his face and gives a sweet kiss on Hunter's lips. 

Sebastian is almost an adult, he is old enough to decide if he wants to share his life with other person. So his father's permission isn't exactly needed. He just happens to respect that man more than most people in his life, so it feels good to have a talk with him before making it all official. Sitting in his study makes Sebastian weirdly nervous. He isn't a child anymore, there wouldn't be a lecture about some tasteless prank. 

”Clarington family. I actually went to school with his father. I didn't know youngest son was a submissive”, Michael starts. He is doodling some random lines with expensive-looking pen. ”And now my only son is emotionally attached to him.”

It's not exactly right, those words sound wrong in Sebastian's ears. ”No... I'm not madly in love with him. It's not like that. He is just different. Hunter can make an impression every day, with little help he can do so much and I can offer that help."

”You sound so serious." Sebastian is suddenly embarrassed. Michael Smythe has always known how to read him. It's a blessing and a curse. 

”Okay. But I wanna meet that boy as soon as possible. Ask him when it would be good time to spend a weekend at our place.” Sebastian ears pick up the words his father used. Ask him. Michael wants to know also Hunter's opinion, he doesn't just assume that of course Hunter agrees anything what Smythes have decided together.

They buy Hunter's new bracelet together. Sebastian has his credit card and he promises other boy whatever he wants from jeweller's. Only thing Hunter wants is a silver chain to decorate his wrist. Sebastian buys it with little plate. His initials are engraved on the side that rests against Hunter's warm skin. 


	56. Like Bonnie and Clyde (2/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian doesn't protest when he is tackled on white sand, and his bare chest is covered in sweet, little kisses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check previous chapter for warnings.
> 
> This was supposed to come earlier, but then I started my job and some other stuff happened.

On their last day at Dalton he makes sure that every single Warbler gets a tight hug from him. It has been good with them, his best memories are from choir room and it aches his heart that next autumn there would be new boys practicing. Jeff who has surprisingly sharp eyes notices his emotional state.

 “We will see each other. Right, Bastian?” Question is whispered in his ear. Jeff is breathing heavily, trying to keep his emotions in check. Promise is a sweet, white lie and maybe Jeff can guess that.

They don’t know about guns packed in the trunk of Hunter’s car, or a bag full of cash in the backseat of same car. He is still warm from hugs and all wishes for good summer when he slides in front seat, next to Hunter whose fingers are snapping his own knee. "Is everything okay?" Sebastian doesn't trust his voice enough, but hopes that kiss on Hunter's cheek would assure him.

They start in the countryside where banks are small and don’t have too many customers. Sebastian is nervous, but somehow holding gun soothes him. He has power, he has Hunter who is fast and confident, and hurries to counter when Sebastian keeps people down with his gun. One guy is reaching for his phone, but perfect shot straight to his shoulder stops those intentions. 

It's like a crazy road trip. Cash, gems and jewelry. They are getting famous and it's a double-edged sword, but there is always some place where people think they wouldn't be there on that day. Hunter buys nice camper with cash - seller doesn't ask complicated questions. Sometimes they live normal camp life, tomato soup is bad, but somehow it's nice to share it with Hunter. Morning kisses taste toothpaste and Sebastian isn't ever cold at night because there is always Hunter's warmth surrounding him. 

It was always their plan to get recognized so Sebastian's heart doesn't beat any faster when first articles appear on the papers. It's just speculation, because both of them are missing people. Writer highlights that everything could be just one big coincidence, but at the same time he gives most delicious little hints. Exactly that kind of shit people who are hungry for rumors love to read. 

There is no need for empty hints when they show their faces in next bank. Their lives are stripped bare in media. It’s slightly amusing when Sebastian is showed as a victim, poor boy from protected life who just got dragged into Hunter Clarington’s hurricane. World gets to know all about them. Their names would be remembered. Random people reading magazines learn to know how they were leading Dalton’s show choir together. Every single detail of Sebastian’s lacrosse career is revealed like it would be something specially interesting. People from Hunter's past are interviewed and secrets are told. Maybe people are exaggerating, maybe they didn't really see through him, but that doesn't matter. Media shows picture of violent and troubled young man anyway. 

First one to kill is Hunter. Girl is hiding under her desk, her shaky finger already on touch screen. Sebastian doesn’t know how Hunter actually notices her, but he anyway turns around. It’s not nice and clinical death when blood from her throat soaks white dress. 

There is a picture on her desk with same blonde girl, handsome young man, and cute little baby. She was somebody’s mom, girlfriend, daughter, maybe even sister, and Hunter had taken her life without a blink. Sebastian bites his lip and runs after Hunter who yells him to leave. 

Of course they are using his poor sister to tempt him. Stacey has lost lots of weight since they saw for the last time, and she looks absolutely devastated with her tight cheekbones and broken face. Her mascara isn’t waterproof. Video of her speech has been published literally everywhere.

 “Come home, Bas. Please”, she begs crushing Sebastian’s heart. “It’s not too later yet, please. I miss you.”

It’s a lie, of course. If Sebastian gave up now, he would be offered a contract. Sacrificing Hunter would probably give him slightly shorter punishment. After that he would still have some life to live, but that would be nothing without Hunter. 

Hunter comes behind him and takes phone from his trembling hand. He would be surely angry, Sebastian shouldn’t let those people mess with his head. For his surprise there is gentleness behind all of it when Hunter takes him in his strong arms.

“I’m sorry for hurting you, beautiful. It has been one hell of a ride with you.” He rubs Sebastian's arms gently, presses a kiss on his neck. 

Later he sees pictures in magazines. Jeff is holding his sister when they hurry from offices to car with black windows, both of them wearing sunglasses. Stacey is still skinny in her miniskirt. Her arms and legs are like sticks, but he knows they would be good with Jeff. Sebastian couldn’t be more sorry for tears and all hurting, but that would end. 

Then Hunter gets caught. Sebastian is running for his life and freedom in the darkness, he is sure that Hunter is right at his heels like usually. Hunter is their mastermind, genius behind all their plans. He is rock, has saved Sebastian so many times.

When he arrives at car, it’s too quiet. There is no panting figure behind him, just dark forest full of shadows, and their escape car with stolen license plates. Sebastian can’t believe it. He hasn’t ever been more lonely than on that moment. When his breathing is steadier, he tries quiet whistle, then owl, all their little ways to communicate when they are separated. Absolutely nothing. 

It’s already everywhere next morning. They have caught one half of infamous duo. Sebastian is on the phone, when they show Hunter in his bright clothes, empty look on his handsome face. Time with Hunter has given him many new contacts and now he uses every favor someone owes Hunter, promises help in the future if they just save them from this trouble, and in the end Sebastian simply begs. 

It’s his personal fight when it’s time to decide if he should go too or not. Sebastian knows there can be an ambush. Authorities are proud of getting Hunter, but if they could get him too, that would be something historical. People are thirsty for his blood. 

Of course he is there when shooting begins. Sebastian hurts his wrist to flying piece of glass, but it’s small when he sees Hunter’s widened eyes and shocked face. “Move, move, move”, he yells straight to Hunter’s face.

“You fucking idiot”, Hunter pants in Sebastian’s shoulder later, his voice soft from laughter. From his those words are like a confession of undying love.

Result is seven dead police offers. News don’t make Hunter specially impressed. Later in the evening he kisses Sebastian’s white bandage and sings him to sleep. It’s an old, romantic song. Sebastian isn’t sure about original singer, but hearing a song like that from Hunter is something special, precious.  

At the age of 24, after their last and biggest ever robbery, Hunter mentions beginning new life. "I just want you", Hunter promises and spins Sebastian around. He laughs against other boy’s face, Sebastian is still feeling sudden movement in his head, and Hunter's body offers good support.

A kiss is breathless, lips moving tenderly against each other. Hunter squeezes his hip, but when their eyes meet, there is a question in that gaze Sebastian has learned to love. It’s first time. Hunter is vulnerable under him when his thighs are spread, and nervousness makes Sebastian's skin tingle. He wants it to be good for Hunter, because Sebastian wants to be Hunter’s first and only he will ever have.  

Hunter needs comfort, his gaze is locked to Sebastian's own. "We have no hurry", he tells heated kisses, his hands mapping everything of Hunter’s body.

Hunter has quiet tears in his eyes when Sebastian’s arms are wrapped around him. “I don’t...” He doesn’t seem to get words out of his mouth, but Sebastian has a good guess what it is about.

 “It’s okay”, he soothes, tries to collect Hunter’s teardrops with his fingertips. There are too many of them and soon tears are rolling freely, making his face and neck wet.

“I love you. I know how they think and how they write. That I was bad, I manipulated and hurt you. Maybe it’s not enough, but I truly care about you. At the beginning I used to think that I could just leave you and save myself if it was needed. It’s different now, I would sacrifice myself for you in a heartbeat.”

Crossing the border isn't perfect success. Hunter is heavy against his side, and bullet wound in his thigh makes other man hiss. "Little bit more. We have come this far together. You can do it, gorgeous. Think about that sexy scar you will get from this. One more to your already impressive collection" He mumbles encouraging nothings, tries to keep Hunter going. 

"Just go, Sebastian", Hunter pleas suddenly, his eyes huge and scared. Sebastian hasn't ever seen that kind of look from Hunter. He is thinking about giving up, so Sebastian could survive to their destination. Sebastian just pinches him angrily and continues walking. It’s a super childish reaction but at least pinch is so surprising that Hunter actually keeps his mouth shut. 

Life is different there. Sebastian has difficulties to get used to warm, almost wet weather. Hunter fusses around him offering nervous promises. “We could try something else. It would be dangerous but I would do it for you. I know you miss Europe.”

That’s a sting in his heart. Yeah. He misses Europe but this is his life and Sebastian has to accept it. Things aren’t absolutely bad. At night they can walk to beach from their house and then just sit on sand, watching millions of stars on the black sky. When Sebastian gets cold, Hunter is ready to offer his jacket for him to wear. 

There are other people who have secrets, who don’t use their given names, and who just don’t want too much attention, so they are also left gloriously alone. Sebastian sleeps gun at arm’s reach and their little house is full of stashes. Cash for different countries and numerous passports. It’s still weird to see his own face with different name and nationalities. They have also a boat, their last great plan, and thinking about it gives him feeling of extra safety. 

Hunter comes from water, wet, heavy footprints behind him. Sebastian doesn't protest when he is tackled on white sand, and his bare chest is covered in sweet, little kisses. "Not here", he mumbles when Hunter gets handsy. Gaze in his eyes is playful and loving, that old glimpse of madness is gone. 

_She'll have you on your knee, "Can I marry you?"_

_Brantley Gilbert - Bottoms up_


	57. Look in her eyes and you're gone forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Nick looks back at it later, and he is pretty sure Sebastian was first person to notice something was wrong."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today it's a bad day, bad life, bad world. I wanted to write Huntbastian so I could calm down a bit, but I was working on this eating disorder Niff-thing. Title isn't mine but I'm not sure anymore where I found it.

It's not anything bad at first. Nick arrives to school after summer. Dalton Academy is familiar and after spending years in private schools and dorm rooms, it's like a home for him. Hellos are thrown from left and right, when he walks towards their dorm room. There are even few fast hugs, boys are happy to see each other even though beginning of the autumn means upcoming stressful times.

He is already there, conquering successfully Nick's heart and his half of the room. There is a pile of Agatha Christie-books on his bed and whole Harry Potter-series on his desk. At first finding books literally everywhere in their dorm was super annoying – Nick hasn't ever been fan of literature – but nowadays it's just a thing he loves in Jeff. Other boy is never bored or lonely. At breakfast table he is usually reading comics with sleepy eyes and all that yawning is just adorable. After classes and rehearsals he collapses to bed and takes one of thick books he is currently reading. There are usually at least three of them.  

He isn't noticed. Jeff hums to himself in low voice and focuses on unpacking rest of his stuff. Nick likes lines of his body in formal blazer too, but he prefers this relaxed Jeff. Tight worn jeans have seen better days, and bright blue tank top makes his hair really stand out.

Blond boy jumps when he hears Nick clearing his throat. Jeff isn't childish in any way but smile that appears on his face is so full of innocence that Nick knows it should be protected with all costs. They meet in a kiss full of laughter and positive feelings. He is glad to be again with Jeff after long summer break.  

Next morning starts much earlier than Nick is used to. He has such a good place in Jeff's bed, blond's pillows surrounding him. It's warm and so nice, there is still at least an hour, maybe even more left before getting up wouldn't be a choice anymore. But tickling feeling on his forehead doesn't leave dark-haired boy.

His eyes are opened slowly. It's his boyfriend who is teasing Nick with a feather. When blond notices that they are in same reality, he gets a fast kiss. ”Good morning, baby. I'm going to track. Would you like to come and keep me company?”

He doesn't really want. It's too comfortable in Jeff's bed, but because Nick is a loyal boyfriend he gets up. Last night Jeff's skin, hips and lips had been so distracting that most of his clothes are still in his bags. Blond boy is stepping back and forth looking restless, when Nick uses too much time to find some other pants besides half of his school uniform and jeans. After covering his upper body with light jacket he is ready to go.

It's weird to pass sleeping dorms. He is used to chatter from rooms, boys who are contacting their families or laughing together. That almost complete silence is nearly spooky. ”Is this even allowed?” Nick asks, but Jeff's warm hand is really convincing.

”Maybe they wouldn't like a blowjob under bleachers, but we are going to do some sports. There couldn't be more harmless activity.”

Nick curses his weakness for exact blond boy when they get outside and wind almost topples him. Maybe it's kinda good weather for exercising but brunette prefers jogging on days when every step isn't fighting.

They start side by side. Neither of the boys is in poor shape, but Jeff has longer legs and simply more motivation, so after few laps Nick lets him go. He just sits on the bench, watching his running boyfriend. It's nice to get a long hug when Jeff has finally finished. It's kinda cold when he has been just sitting there. 

He gets some breakfast from cafeteria while Jeff takes a shower. Nick devours happily pancakes and yoghurt and huge mug of coffee. Morning jog had left him starving. When Jeff closes bathroom door behind him, body still damp from water, he doesn't look happy at all.

”I left some also for you”, Nick offers an apologetic smile, hand covering his kinda full stomach.

”I was actually planning to drop few pounds, not eat myself even fatter than I already am.”

Nick looks at him more carefully than before. Long lines, soft skin, he loves every single inch of that body. Maybe there is little bit more softness than before summer break, but it's really nothing. Without mornings at pool and drinks at midday he would lose it very fast.

Nick shrugs. Jeff's nature is sweet and gentle, but he can be also stubborn. ”Whatever you want, love. But take at least yoghurt, please.” Jeff agrees and later brunette steals a strawberry kiss. Sebastian passes them, rolling his eyes at the sight, but there is friendliness behind the gesture.  

It starts innocently enough. Going to gym is something they can do together, and Jeff couldn't look more adorable in his colourful t-shirts.

”You know everything about exercising, right?” Jeff asks Hunter Clarington. He is sitting on neatly made bed, a laptop on his thighs. Sebastian is also there, body relaxed on the bed, headphones covering his ears. There is an abandoned notebook on his stomach, maybe he had been trying to find an inspiration for The Warblers. It's very nice sight anyway and when Nick watches them, Hunter's fingers brush Sebastian's hair. He is pretty sure their captain doesn't even notice what he is doing.

”Well, I wouldn't say everything, but I can give you few tips.”

"Nothing too hardcore, all of us don't want to end up looking like you.” Nick is absent-mindedly adoring Hunter's impressive biceps and that makes Jeff shove him less friendly.

But Jeff doesn't know when he should stop. Nick goes to gym maybe three times every week and does some jogging too. He eats with a healthy appetite and doesn't say no if some of the boys suggests movie night with beer and snacks. At the same time his boyfriend is gaining too much control. He runs every day, skips breakfast and eats like a tiny bird during lunch. Every day Nick sees him eating less and less food.  

There is just hunger in his dark eyes, when Jeff sees Nick with his homework and cookies. Smell is intoxicating and it's distressing to try to do anything when Jeff is almost drooling on the other side of their room. "Do you want some?" he finally asks even though it's futile. Jeff has two carrots to eat and it's only thing Nick has seen in front of his boyfriend on whole day

The Warblers get to know when there is a fainting in the rehearsal. Nick looks back at it later, and he is pretty sure Sebastian was first person to notice something was wrong. Tall boy was already moving when Jeff lost control of his body. He almost caught their blond but at least kept his head from hitting the floor.

Noise from his mouth isn't humane. Sebastian's long fingers caress Jeff's pale face, new kind of sharpness that covers his features. Nick hears all voices just vaguely, somebody is about to make a call, other boy is walking towards the door, probably with an intention to get a school nurse. Her picture floats to Nick's mind, all gentle and friendly, soft hands and bright voice. But in this case she would be merciless, it would take one look at Jeff's suffering body to understand what is going on with him. Jeff would be taken away, and that would make him angry with Nick, maybe to the point where it couldn't be fixed anymore.  

He doesn't allow those acts. Nick knows it's desperate and childish, they can't really help their friend. Jeff is dear to all of them, but he needs professional help. 

”You are out, Sterling”, Hunter Clarington tells firmly. Sebastian is near, sitting on desk, feet in the air. Even though he pretends to be focused on his homework, Nick knows he is listening closely. It's not easy to understand what is exactly happening between captain of the Warblers and his co-captain.

”You can't do it. There is no better dancer than me.” Hunter isn't impressed. He has clearly planned this carefully. ”Yes, you are the best. Maybe kicking you out will cost our success, and I would hear about that more than you can even imagine. But if I can take away a change to hurt your body, it's worth it.”

It's quiet when they leave room. Suddenly Jeff's fingers find his own and smile is almost similar as in good, old times. ”I'm tired, Nicky. Do you want to take a nap with me?” Napping with Jeff used to be one of his favourite activities, now it just makes Nick nervous. There are so many little things demanding his attention, at times he checks instinctively if Jeff is even still breathing. Touching his body isn't pleasurable, because Nick is always stupidly scared that he could harm, that skinny and weak Jeff feels under his touch. Skin and bones. Just skin and bones.

Sebastian Smythe is watching Jeff's dancing in empty class room. He could be alone, though. Other boy is perfectly ignorant when he moves with slow song, his body hypnotic and somehow sensual if watcher just doesn't pay attention to his too heavy breathing or sweaty forehead. Even small athletic acts are nowadays burdens for him.

”I reported him”, Sebastian tells Nick. ”I can't watch this continuing. Maybe he... Maybe he won't be okay, but it's not enough what we are doing. He needs real help.”

Nick is just empty. He thinks about good times, kisses, laughter, fights. When Nick tried to read a book for English, Jeff was clutching him tight, arms and legs everywhere. Result was kisses and I love yous, stupid book was forgotten on the floor where Nick kicked it. They had dreams, about going to Paris and watching town from Eiffel tower. In the night of course. Jeff has a poster of Paris above his bed, and dreamy gaze in his eyes used to be one of Nick's favourite things. They haven't talked about Paris for long time. 

After Monday's classes he is gone. Or Jeff's stuff is still in their room, but it looks like blond, lively boy wouldn't have ever lived there. All books are too neatly organized. Pencils are collected to a red London-mug on his desk. He remembers that eight hours earlier there were some jeans and shirts lying on the floor, but now they are covering back of his chair.

Nick is so deep in his own thoughts that hearing mrs. Sterling's voice scares him. He is wide-eyed and jumpy when beautiful woman in her forties gets up from Nick's own bed. ”Nicholas.” Nick has missed a hug, hug from mom who would convince him that Nick isn't bad person. But his own mom wouldn't ever hug him because of Jeff.

Warm arms are wrapped around his shoulders. Mrs. Sterling is petite but right now she feels stronger than Nick. ”I never said anything about his looks. For me he was perfect anyway”, he whispers in broken voice.

”Of course Nicholas. I know you care about my son. Jeff has to take some time for himself. It's a good place, best I was able to get, I promise that, but in the end it's just about his willingness to get better.”

It's a sunny day. Nick is out with the boys, they are kicking a ball back and forth, just enjoying company of other people and light exercising. Dark-haired boy doesn't know how good he looks. With Jeff gone he needed new activity and focused on going to gym. Now he is beautifully muscled, already tanned skin looking healthy in sunlight.

Blond boy takes his sunglasses off, and almost turns away because Nick is definition of balanced human being. Jeff isn't what he used to be. It's an achievement to enjoy piece of chocolate without guiltiness. Ideas of control are still crossing his mind.

”Jeff, babe.” Voice is breathless and soft. It's hard to believe for Nick, he hadn't gotten any kind of message beforehand. They meet at white fence, Nick crosses it easily and then he is in Jeff's arms. Boys would like to say hello too, but they know better and give them time together.

He wants to get closer, drops kisses everywhere and each of them makes Jeff's hesitant smile wider. 


	58. Roses are red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Do you want to hear a secret?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for mpreg. Nothing too graphic though.
> 
> Edit. 
> 
> When I first published this, I was quite sure there was something missing from notes. Got a comment which suggested warning about carrier-Hunter, and there it was. I should have opened that one more. Sebastian is always my free spirit, and I guess I'm personally slightly uncomfortable with mpreg!Seb. In addition I have a tendency to test things I haven't seen a lot/ at all. So also warning for mpreg!Hunter.

When test results shows it’s true, there is no shock in Hunter’s mind. He had already been sure, symptoms had been so clear and obvious. He is carrying Sebastian’s child. Sad smile paints Hunter’s face when he thinks about his boyfriend. Or maybe he should say lover, that’s much less established term.

Because Sebastian Smythe can’t be owned. Rules were made clear months ago. It’s not dating, no Friday evenings in movie theaters and pizza places, no sweet good morning-kisses or sugary words. After school Sebastian would fly, leave whole country behind him. There is already flight ticket in the drawer of his bedside table, Hunter has seen it. It’s between Sebastian’s journal. He was tempted when he saw that blue book wasn’t behind a lock – Sebastian doesn’t belong to Hunter, but they trust each other. In the end he was better than that. Reading Sebastian’s thoughts without his permission would have been vile. 

Hunter was anxious and in a hurry when he returned from pharmacy. After buying the test he just wanted to get it done, so of course fucking bathroom lock was forgotten. Pure horror freezes his brain and body when door is suddenly opened. It’s a boy with bright, blond hair – Jeff Sterling, best dancer in the Warblers. 

Jeff doesn’t notice his captain immediately. Boy is looking at his phone screen, soft smile on his face. Phone is almost dropped when Hunter clears his throat awkwardly. He would like to be anywhere else, not in the situation where he is still holding that damned test. 

“Yes it’s mine and Sebastian’s”, he says coldly. Hunter isn’t really ready to talk about this right now. Other boy could say god knows what accidentally offensive. Diplomacy doesn’t usually belong to his strongest abilities. 

But instead of nosy questions there is a warm hand squeezing his arm, and a nice chest to lean on. Hunter isn’t ready to cry. He isn’t sure what should be his reason for endless tears. Hunter’s mind is still processing, he is trying to understand that he has a piece of Sebastian inside of him. Sebastian would be gone but he wouldn’t need to lose everything.

“Do you want to hear a secret?”

“I had been with with Nick only for few months. We were drunk, fucked in his car. It was ridiculous and hot. I guess it was that kind of nigh you can remember when you are old and gray.”

“And you started to feel funny.”

“More than funny. I spent a week throwing up before I went to see a nurse. Couldn’t eat a thing.”

“Did you ever think about it? Raising a baby, getting to know him or her. You could have had such a beautiful child together.”

Now he is in a loose embrace. A light kiss on his forehead makes moment very intimate. “Yeah, naturally. I also thought about it how we were still in high school, silly kids, drunk from hormones and love. It could have worked. Getting a baby together would have made us more mature. But I don’t want to be mature now. I wanna spend nights dancing, watch sunsets on the roof and live while I’m still young. Baby doesn’t fit in my plans right now.”

They both sigh. Jeff is still holding Hunter, doesn't seem to be leaving anytime soon. "Are you going to tell Sebastian?" They both think about him, excited plans about finally going home, his dreamy eyes and steps that are lighter and lighter every day. "I didn't mean to get feelings. It would be easier not to like him. It was supposed to be just bros helping bros, not anything more complicated, Hunter sniffs pathetically. 

"if it helps, you can always call or text me. I don't claim that I understand everything what is going on in your head, but I have at least some experience. You don't have to deal with this alone."

It's useless to go there, of course they aren't happily planning a nursery. Hunter is just barely keeping it together because Sebastian hadn't even texted from airport, and maybe there is tiny hope inside of him. Maybe he has sometimes imagined that his mom would be excited and happy, and his father wouldn't freak out. But of course it's impossible to get what he wants. That would be first time ever. 

His father's behaviour couldn't be more predictable. When left half of his face is hit painfully hard, Hunter's hands are already protecting his stomach, someone who is so tiny and helpless. Hunter is only person that newcomer can trust. 

He is given twenty minutes to leave his childhood home. Heart pounding violently in his chest Hunter goes through his old room. It's absolutely senseless, but there are some of his favourite books in the shelf of his old childhood room. Hunter can’t leave them. Besides them he takes only clothes. One last look and he is already out of the door. Three minutes left. 

Car is his only shelter, it offers only mediocre safety, but that's all Hunter has. He is swallowing a lump from his throat when he slides to the front seat. It's a lonely road without proper destination. 

He is driving, singing with the radio and trying to forget catastrophe which should be called his life. Hunter considers ignoring it when his abandoned phone starts ringing. He could just throw it from the window, it's too tiring to get more shit about his life choices. But seeing his mom's phone number manages to rouse good son inside of his head.

She has been driving behind him, has packed some extra clothes and a bag of food in her own car. Most important thing is a note in her wallet. "Do you remember aunt Lizzie?"

It's just a vague memory. She does some farming, has probably few horses if Hunter isn't absolutely wrong. Lizzie is loner of the family, she usually sends cards and gifts for Christmas, but not anything else. "She will help you. You can live at the farm and have some time for yourself. I know this situation isn't ideal, but I'm going to talk with your father, when he calms down a bit. You can text and call any time. You are my only child, Hunter. I wouldn't ever leave you because of this."

Hunter could ask a snarky question about situation where he wouldn't be only kid and son. Situation where he would have big brother with better achievements and without whole pregnancy-issue. Would he be skipped then? But whole moment is too tiring, so Hunter just accepts arms around him. It's most motherly hug he had received for years. 

"So, how does that boy look like?" Diane Clarington asks, sounding honestly curious. Hunter dares to show few photos which were hidden in glove compartment of his care. In the first one Sebastian is reading a book, handsome and stuck in his thoughts. He hadn't ever noticed Hunter snapping that photo. Other picture is his cherished treasure. It's their first kiss. Hunter still remembers that party, alcohol in his system and Sebastian's dry, confident lips. He had other boy's hands on his thighs and Hunter knew anything couldn't be the same. 

At the farm Hunter is helping with whatever he can. It’s frustrating. He has spent years developing his body, making it his finest tool, but now he is getting slower and bigger every day. When working outside gets impossible, it’s simply too big burden to his body, there are still accounting and website of the farm. Hunter sits inside, cool drink on the desk next to him and honestly enjoys when he can be useful and pay back at least somehow. 

He misses physical activities. Hunter hates to be delicate and fragile, he is given pamphlets about male pregnancies and all of them are saying that he should just relax. Running is out of question, but he takes long, peaceful walks. In the morning he is only human being visible, when he maps paths crossing his aunt’s fields. Ridiculous-looking hat covers his head from almost burning sunshine, and taking a regular sip from his water bottle keeps him focused. 

Going to hospital on that big day makes him shaky. They ask one last time if there is someone they could call. Nobody wants to believe that Hunter is alone in that situation. Usually pregnant men are adored and cherished, there is a family full of loving people, who are excitedly nervous, hoping that everything goes well. “Couldn’t we just move on?” he asks tiredly.

Few hours later it’s over. Hunter’s body seems to be aching everywhere, but it’s worth it when he is allowed to see his daughter. She has a tuft of brown hair, and when she opens her wide eyes, Hunter falls in love. His mouth is dry even though he had just emptied glass of water. Baby could be Sebastian’s small copy.

“She is so beautiful”, he stutters, not able to believe that this wonderful little person is his and Sebastian’s shared creation.

"Yes she is", nurse holding his baby answers. "You should be proud of yourself."

Jeff has sunsets of summer in his eyes and nights full of memories in his slightly raspy voice when he comes to visit Hunter. He has a dozen of pink roses and a huge fruit basket with him. Blond boy is most exciting thing they have seen for a while and aunt Lizzie is immediately charmed by his open smile and polite attitude.

 “Is he?” she asks in the kitchen while Jeff is cooing at the baby. He seems to get along with Summer very well. Idea is slightly amusing. Hunter loves Jeff, who wouldn’t? He is that person in the group who can see a rainbow through darkest clouds, but at the same time Hunter can’t see Jeff as a sexy person.

“No he isn’t. Jeff is... Friend, I guess. I wouldn’t have called him that before, but he truly is.

Summer is eight years old. She takes shit from nobody and is smartest kids of her class. When Hunter was called to school to hear about a conflict where his daughter had bitten older bully, he didn’t know if he should have been proud or angry. It reminded him of similar fiery personality who also had those gleaming green eyes.

 Hunter likes to think that they are doing well. It hasn’t always been easy, there were nights when Summer spent hours yelling, and Hunter was so tired he could have died. But it was all worth it, when he got to see his daughter growing up. They proved wrong those people who dared to say bad things, and nowadays even his father is one of Summer’s favourite people in the world. 

Being at the beach isn't his favourite thing. Hunter tries to believe that he is gorgeous in the sunshine - getting his body back after everything asked sweating like a pig, but he is still more self-conscious than before those happenings. It gets worse when there is painfully familiar, low voice behind him. Luckily Summer is just getting out of water, Hunter couldn't keep an eye on her, when it feels like his spine is frozen. Sebastian Smythe says only his name, and Hunter curses Jeff under his breath. It can't be anybody else. Blond is only person from high school he is still talking to. 

Summer walks towards them, probably with an intention to ask money for ice cream or something similar. Hunter doesn't know what to do, so he just sits there, painfully aware of green eyes staring at his back. 

They spend a long time just looking at each other. Summer’s chin is up, and look in her eyes makes Hunter slightly nervous. He is on the edge, isn’t really sure if he wants to see how this goes. It has been good. Does Summer need another father if he can’t stay in little girl’s life? Hunter has come this far alone, he could live through upcoming happenings, teenager years, parties, boyfriends – he is already planning to get a shotgun.

 “Hi dad”, Summer smiles softly, making Sebastian smile. It’s honest and genuine. 


	59. So kiss me and smile for me, tell me that you'll wait for me (1/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I volunteer."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hunger Games-AU. Some violence, but not anything very detailed.
> 
> Title doesn't belong to me.

His name shouldn’t be called. Sebastian’s father is almost richest man of the district. It’s not amazing, but it has been enough for last three years that his nowadays blind son doesn’t need to beg on the streets to support himself. There are many kids who have way more notes in that glass bowl.

Name is repeated and Sebastian knows he should go, or peacekeepers would drag him on the stage. It’s a straight death sentence for a boy like him. He hasn’t run even a step for three years, not after that accident which had taken his ability see. Maybe in the world before accident he could have survived, somehow. At least he wouldn't have been first one to die. Crowd is moving, for a moment it feels like there could be a riot, because people don’t like this. Whole concept of The Hunter Games is hated, but people are even more protective of their disabled kids. 

There was one blind kid, maybe four years ago. He managed to survive three days, was hiding in the forest, found even water to drink and berries to eat. Sebastian doesn’t remember boy’s name or district, he would have been probably killed by some surprise from Gamemakers, but The Careers found him first. They saw a change for an impressive kill, and people in Capitol cheered for that slow torture which was shown in national television. Boy was still alive half an hour later when his face was just a bloody mess. There were fucking  _pieces_ of him lying on the ground. 

His destiny would be similar. Sebastian is already imagining first bloodbath of the Games. Running and yelling tributes, blurry colours and blood. So much blood when The Careers would arrive to the weapons. Maybe there would be some other lucky tributes who wouldn’t be lost with swords, knives, arrows and spears. 

Sebastian could decide between two options, just waiting for his killer, or an attempt to run even though he wouldn’t have any idea about closest shelter. Maybe they would be merciful, not already looking for extra credit. In that situation Sebastian would get a knife between his shoulder blades, it would be simple death, and at least suffering of his loved ones wouldn’t last long. 

Peacekeepers are pushing their way through people. Warm hand takes Sebastian’s own. “Come on. I’ll help you. Just like usually. It’s all okay.” Then Jeff raises his voice, keeping his body between Sebastian and those faceless men. “He is coming. He was just surprised. Wait a moment, he is blind. Nobody needs to get hurt.” Blond boy is reasonable, doesn’t try to provoke people around them, so he is allowed to lead Sebastian alone even though group of guards clearly follows them. 

Volunteering isn't typical in their district. Most people just want to be left alone, they don't have skills or bravery to the arena. Sebastian hadn't thought about the possibility that he could be saved. Realizing his own fragile mortality had been enough. But of course that lovely, brave almost boyfriend does it. When that question is asked, voice answering it sounds more like a man than a boy who is only eighteen.

"I volunteer." Sebastian can see it in his mind. Hunter Clarington is tough guy, his not so easy life can be seen on his face, and if someone from their district has abilities to win, it's him. 

They are something undefined. It’s just a fact that after the accident Hunter adopted right way to treat Sebastian. Whenever he had time, there was a quiet knock on Sebastian’s bedroom door. It didn’t happen often because Hunter has been taking care of his little sisters after their father's sudden death. But still he was there, reading news in his low voice, or singing to Sebastian. Sometimes they even danced. Sebastian refused at first, his stomach tight, nervous flatness against Hunter’s wide palms.

“Why are you so worried? Just let me hold you. I’ll be our music baby.” So they danced in Sebastian’s bedroom, Hunter’s voice filling the room. It was stupidly romantic even though romance shouldn’t have had place in their reality.

Few times Sebastian had Hunter’s hard, hot body under him. His lips wandered there, teeth scratching skin on his side and nose poking abdomen before he arrived where he was wanted. Hunter never thought he was fragile. Blindness didn’t change anything, they were still a thing. First friends, then something bigger and different.

Sebastian’s mouth between Hunter’s legs, sucking and swallowing, bringing pleasure without demands. But he wasn’t forgotten. After recovering from his orgasm, Hunter’s hands, lips and raspy words were there. Sebastian came hard in his arms, hearing compliments like “beautiful”, “so fucking hot”, “amazing”. In other world there could have been I love yous. 

Sometimes they spent whole night together. It was comfortable to fall as sleep, Sebastian's head resting on Hunter's chest. Usually he woke up in an empty bed, but that didn't make him feel worthless, because there was always a note, just few lines about everyday things, signed with pedantic H. But no matter how early Hunter left the house, Sebastian's sister was always awake, waiting for him. Usually she had food, cheese, bread, sometimes extra good things that were impossible to afford for Claringtons. Few times there were also old girls' clothes. "This would be so pretty for Rosanna. And mint will look amazing with Lauretta’s hair. Every girl needs some beautiful things to wear.You make my brother happy. Few dresses and shirts aren’t much compared to that.”

Tributes shake hands before they are taken away. Jeff is watching whole situation closely, something takes his attention and Sebastian is left on the stage. "Wait here, I'll be right back." So Sebastian just stands there, feeling small raindrops on his face and listening to leaving people. Most lives haven't changed today, so people are going back to their normal chores. He is almost jealous. 

"He has asked to see you", Jeff is back, fast, excited presence on his right side. His walking is almost jogging and Sebastian stumbles behind him. 

Jeff isn’t allowed in the room where Hunter is saying his goodbyes, so Sebastian has to find his route by touching the doorway and wall. He moves clumsily, hoping that there isn’t any furniture in front of him. But then he is pulled against Hunter’s chest, and Sebastian forgets all about possible delicate decorations in the room.

“Why did you do it? There are guys who have prepared for this for years.”

“Do you think I would have allowed them to take you? You are yourself, for me you are same as always. Nothing has changed. Bossy, bitchy, annoying thing, who is so important for me. But you aren’t winner-material for Games.”

There isn’t really much to talk. Hunter just holds him, his hand petting Sebastian’s back slowly. “If I’ll come back, I’m going to marry you.” It has always been there, unspoken dedication to each other. “Crown of victor would mean enough money to support you and give everything you need.”

Sebastian protests softly. “I don’t need luxuries.”

“Yes, but you know what I mean. I couldn’t take you away from your childhood home now. But if I don’t do it... Lauretta and Rosanna. I know it’s a big favour, but if I’m killed, can you make sure that they won’t end up on streets, starving?” Hunter’s little sisters. Rosanna who is beautiful like a queen with her deep blue eyes and flaming, red hair. She is quiet type, sometimes she just comes to the door of the Smythes and asks a permission to spend time in Sebastian’s father’s small library. Lauretta, little songbird of their district. She is alway happy, poverty hasn’t been able to fade her glorious smile.

Hunter is their whole world and his sisters are same for him. 

 _So kiss me and smile for me_  
_Tell me that you'll wait for me_  
_Hold me like you'll never let me go_  
_'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane_  
_Don't know when I'll be back again_  
_Oh babe, I hate to go_

_John Denver - Leaving on a jet plane_


	60. Goldie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For this little fic inspiration was [this](http://brightsummernights7cf.tumblr.com/post/120121079240/submitted-au-292#permalink-notes) post. And because I always like to say few words about my fics, I can tell that this one is slightly personal. I like dogs, I'm a pure dog person as long as them are on tv, books, magazines or something like that.

Hunter works as a teacher, and loves his job even though kids can be frustrating. His own class contains mostly boys, who are over energetic and repeat same things over and over again – Hunter wouldn’t really want to tell six times every day, that “ _No Jamie, you can’t jump from the window. You don’t know how to fly, and we are in third floor”_ or “ _Stop right now Steven. Cassandra doesn’t want to get her hair cut.”_

But they are also inspiring. Hunter knows it is absolutely right place for him, when it’s Friday afternoon and 23 sleepy, little human beings are listening to his reading. Nobody is whispering or laughing, all of them are focused on his calm voice and beloved story. Harry Potter is their favourite. Sometimes they should be solving mathematical problems, but then someone asks a question and Hunter finds himself telling everything he knows about dinosaurs.

So yeah, work is great, but at home he prefers quiet lifestyle. Hunter’s small apartment is always neat, after weekend there aren’t beer bottles or empty pizza boxes lying around in the kitchen. His two cats, Killer and Trouble also appreciate nice living space. Even for neighbors he had his own standards, no families with little children, no students, especially no student boys who are probably organizing parties every weekend and doing all kind of inappropriate stuff all the time.

Youngest of his neighbors turned 65 last year, so Hunter has considered whole neighbor-project success until now. His own floor Hunter has shared with two, sweet grandmas. Suddenly older of them, over 90 years old Cynthia dies. Hunter meets her son and granddaughter when they are going through her things. His honest and heartfelt condolences are given, but secretly Hunter is already worrying who would be his next neighbor.

His worst fears come true. Person moving to Cynthia’s old apartment is pretty okay. Attractive guy is about Hunter’s age, and seems to be spending quite a lot of time at work, so he isn't at home having loud sex or parties. But on his free time, this person with last name “Smythe” is walking his dog.

In his organized, controlled world dogs are only weaker element, and it’s mostly fine, because there aren’t that many pets in his social circle. But Smythe has a collie, quite big, fluffy thing with sharp ears and long nose. It’s kinda pretty. From distance. Hunter has always assumed that collies are calm dogs, and don’t get excited like their cousins.

But apparently Smythe’s Goldie is somehow different or Hunter’s idea of collies isn’t flawless. Goldie gets excited enough for all other collies, that’s sure. Very quickly she develops some kind of affection for Hunter. Every time when they meet outside those two small apartments, she barks, and jumps around and against Hunter, doing everything what scares person who is always careful around dogs.

In Hunter’s opinion dogs are fucking awesome. In the television for example. He can get along also with small and sleepy ones, his aunt had a chihuahua years ago, and Hunter loved to sit on her sofa, petting small dog who always wanted to be on his lap. But even slightly bigger dogs make him tense, almost scared. It doesn’t help the situation that Smythe is handsome bastard, perfectly ignorant for Hunter’s stupid problem with his dog.

“Oh she really likes you”, he just smiles charmingly when Hunter is pressed against the wall, trying to pass dog as fast as possibly. His heart is beating furiously and his sight seems to become slightly blurry. Hunter is almost panicking and it doesn’t get easier before he is outside, breathing fresh air, and has left that dog behind him.

Of course Goldie manages to run away from her owner. Hunter is coming back from a jog. He is just minding his own business and can’t understand what he has done to deserve that kind of destiny. Arrow of brown, golden and white fur runs towards him. His mind is telling Hunter to run to nearest apartment building and slam door straight to Goldie’s nose, but his feet don’t agree with that. Them are paralyzed with fear when big dog barks at him, cornering him against tree very easily.

Nobody comes for his help. Area is already quiet enough and it’s ten pm. After his jog Hunter had wanted to curl up on the sofa, maybe watch some Criminal Minds and have hot chocolate before going to sleep. Now he is there, scared by this monster and has no idea how to get away.

“Goldie! Come here, silly girl!” Goldie’s ears twitch at Smythe’s voice, but Hunter isn’t left alone. He is shaking now, barely hiding his pure hysteria. He hates dogs. Hunter wanted nothing except to live his life and maybe admire Smythe’s great looks from distance, but now he is getting humiliated because of this too eager, over grown puppy.

“Hey, why didn’t you just catch her? You know Goldie wouldn’t hurt a fly.” Dark-haired man is now holding his dog, so Hunter’s feet start working again. He should move away. Maybe his parents could borrow him some money to buy a house from lonely place, where he wouldn’t be forced to deal with obnoxious neighbors and their even more obnoxious pets.

There is no right kind of answer for that. Sebastian puts Goldie on a leash, and comes closer, keeping dog away from Hunter who is shaky from nerves and cooling evening air. “Are you alright? I know Goldie is bit crazy around you, but she doesn’t mean anything bad...”

Hunter snaps. “This is what is wrong with you fucking dog owners. You don’t understand that all people aren’t immediately in love with your sweetheart. For some people dogs are simply frightening no matter how kind them may be.”

He makes an attempt to leave, but Smythe is faster, when he seizes Hunter’s arm. Tears are burning and humiliating on Hunter’s skin. “Are you crying? Fuck, I’m so so sorry.”

Hunter isn’t immediately ready to accept his apology. “Get that monster away from me”, he hisses. Smythe doesn’t laugh. Maybe he would have a reason to be amused, it has to look funny when strong guy like Hunter behaves like a hysterical teenager girl because of Smythe’s fluffy, harmless dog. Dark-haired man’s hand just slides across Hunter’s arm finding his sweaty fingers and soon enough they are holding hands.

“Just try to relax. I’ll take Goldie home, and then I’ll come to your place with drinks. I guess I owe you that much after this incident.” He isn’t mocking Hunter. There is a small ghost of a genuine smile on Smythe’s lips, and considering the fact that he doesn’t even know Smythe’s first name, Hunter is feeling almost too good. 


	61. After dark, laughin' in the rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Operation was a disaster”, Kurt tells quietly after tasting a cookie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [link](http://brightsummernights7cf.tumblr.com/post/120334296910/otpdisaster-person-a-undergoing-physical-mental) and another [link](http://brightsummernights7cf.tumblr.com/post/115843258185/iglovequotes-daily-dose-of-love-quotes-here#per). Title from Nickelback. 
> 
> Torture is mentioned briefly but it's not described in any way.

Sebastian knew exactly what he promised when he said yes to Hunter’s proposal. He knew it was a risky decision, that there were things Hunter couldn’t control. They were high school sweethearts, broke up in good terms in the summer after graduation, because of different paths their lives were taking. Sebastian was moving to west, he wanted to have some time only for himself, and Hunter’s mind was full of army.

It was reunion for the Warblers where they met again. Hunter held Sebastian’s hand longer than was necessary and they didn’t really see anybody besides each other. Few wine bottles later his lap was full of very eager Sebastian Smythe. “I want your phone number”, Hunter mumbled into his skin after making it purple with his mouth. “Fine, fine”, Sebastian answered. “But I want your dick before that.”

Hunter’s current job has been grey area. Sebastian knows it’s pretty dangerous and has something to do with the government. On some mornings he is waken up by Hunter who has taken his suitcase from closet and is packing in a hurry. He doesn’t ever leave without telling Sebastian how much he loves, and Sebastian knows why it is like that. It’s possible that Hunter doesn’t return, he goes to places where explosions and gunshots are mundane.  Kisses are light like feathers. One on his forehead, one on both cheeks, and Hunter’s scent tickling his nose. Last one is always passionate, Hunter kisses him slowly, doesn’t seem to get enough of him when he gently slides his tongue in Sebastian’s mouth. 

Usually he returns with some exotic souvenirs. Sebastian has few shelves full of weird things Hunter has brought from abroad, but he doesn't really care about presents. It's much more important to get healthy and living Hunter home. 

But when he is brought back in black SUV, dark windows protecting him from extra eyes, it's not a real surprise. Sebastian knew something like this could happen. Person  accompanying Sebastian’s husband looks almost too young to be a steely professional. "Kurt Hummel", he greets Sebastian with a firm handshake. "I have been working with Clarington for last three weeks."

"You aren't one of his colleagues?" Sebastian asks when they are walking towards the house. Hunter follows quietly, but for some reason Sebastian can't look at him right now. In normal situation he would be already in familiar embrace, getting his lips swollen from kisses. "No. We are working in same place, but Clarington was taking part in actual operations. My job is to help those who come back with problems. Right now he has lots of difficulties."

In the house Hunter passes them without single word. Sebastian doesn't know how he should react, so he focuses on offering coffee to Kurt. He accepts it with a tight smile and takes even some cookies. 

“Operation was a disaster”, Kurt tells quietly after tasting a cookie. “One person died. Other has a quadriplegia. His eyes are only thing moving in his body. When I think about those facts, I know Clarington was luckiest of them. At least he is at home with most important person of his life.”

Sebastian glances at his husband, who is sitting in an armchair, blue eyes staring at emptiness. Right arm is supported by a white sling and there are few stitches across his hairline. Emmy, their chihuahua is sniffing his left foot carefully, but she doesn’t get a reaction. Seeing their pet’s behavior forms a tight ball in Sebastian’s throat. It’s like she would understand that Hunter is hurt, that anything isn’t okay anymore.

“What happened?” He finally asks Kurt, who is just moving his spoon in dark coffee.

“Clarington was a captive. Eight hellish days before our guys found him. Those men... They were executed immediately, but as you see, harm was already done.”

“Does he... Is his brain damaged?” Sebastian can’t imagine any other explanation to Hunter’s empty face, and if he is completely honest, it’s not sure if Sebastian is able to deal with that kind of condition. Hunter was his counterpart, love of his life, completed Sebastian on mental and physical level.

Kurt shakes his head, something bitter covering his delicate face. “I have seen reports of his physical injuries and talked with his doctors. Physically he is going to be fine. There are nasty scars on his wrists and ankles, and few other marks, but nothing else. But Clarington was tortured, mentally and physically. He has just somehow closed himself from whole world. He eats and goes to bathroom, takes showers normally, and goes to bed when he feels tired, but his actual personality is in some distant place. Getting connection is impossible. That’s why we brought him here. You may have a key to his mind.”

Next day Sebastian gives food to Emmy and then packs his unwilling husband in their car. “We are going to have a picnic”, he tells in fake, cheerful voice. “Do you remember that lake? I wanted to slaughter you when you thought it was a good idea to watch sunrise there. How could I have known that you were planning a proposal? There you were, singing that cheesy song on your knee.”

Sebastian has to stop talking. Memories and driving don’t seem to be good combination. Maybe lake isn’t either. It’s still quite cold, so they end up eating in the car. Hunter nibbles his baquette. Maybe his features are bit more relaxed, but familiar sight isn’t enough to get him out of the place where he has hidden his personality, real Hunter.

“I love you”, Sebastian says, every word heavy and meaningful. “I know what I promised. Good times and bad times. I’m here. You are safe now, Hunter.”

That song has been forgotten a long time ago, but memories are again flooding his mind when Sebastian finds unnamed CD. He listens to it curiously and doesn’t even notice tears falling to the collar of his shirt. He has traveled back in time. Sebastian is seeing a stage, group of boys dancing in flawless sync. Most of them are only eyeless figures, he only has eyes for a soloist, boy who is enjoying the moment. His eyes are bright, full of life, and that person couldn’t be more different than empty shell who shares Sebastian’s life nowadays.

Sebastian is sobbing in his hands when someone sits behind him. He is pulled between Hunter’s legs and soft handkerchief dries his tears. There is a warning of upcoming headache behind his forehead, but Sebastian doesn’t care about that, when he is allowed to lean against Hunter’s familiar chest. Intimacy isn’t anymore part of their weird relationship. “We loved so much”, he tells. “Why this had to happen? I’d still choose you, every goddamned time, but it’s not right how much we lost.”

It’s another reunion. Apparently their old buddies are getting sentimental. Invitation is fancy one, expensive, creamy paper and a logo in right upper corner. Sebastian almost rips it. In theory it would be nice to go. He doesn’t have lots of social life, when his time is shared between working and his attempts to communicate with Hunter, but how could he explain? Sebastian isn’t willing to take their pity, but that would be the result when they would see how fragile invincible captain is nowadays.  

There is also a phone number. Sebastian recognizes it, he has same number in his own phone even though they aren’t talking a lot nowadays. Of course it’s Jeff Sterling who is organizing also this happening. It’s just a whim to call him and luckily he picks up quickly so Sebastian has no time to regret.

Voice is slightly darker and lower, but still it brings that cheerful, innocent blond to his mind. “Hey, Sebastian. Did you want to talk about reunion? Hopefully you are coming”, he begins, voice pure sunshine and positivity.

Sebastian bursts into tears. That scares the fuck out of Jeff, who thinks it’s somehow his fault. “Don’t worry, Seb. You don’t have to come if you don’t want. It’s okay. How is Hunter?”

That question is last straw. He babbles hysterically, pours everything about their situation to Jeff. At least Sebastian has a diplomacy to get out of the house. Hunter doesn’t need to hear how tired he is, how hopeless it sometimes feels, how much easier it could be with different partner. 

“Wow”, Jeff sighs when Sebastian has finished their story. “First thing. You are definitely coming to reunion, both of you. I know what you are thinking right now and I’ll talk to guys. Don’t worry, Sebastian. I have an idea.”

In high school it wasn’t always wise to trust Jeff’s numerous ideas, but maybe he has gotten bit more mature. Or not. At first Sebastian is really suspicious when he hears what blond has been planning. “You want us to perform?” he is eyeing group of men around him. Most of them are wearing smart shirts and jeans. Anybody isn’t totally out of shape, so in theory Jeff’s idea shouldn’t be a massive catastrophe.

“Only with your permission, of course”, Jeff replies. “I was thinking about something what we used to perform back in school. Or if you have something special on your mind, I don’t think it’s a problem. About choreography. Just few, nice, simple things, I guess.”

Sebastian has a song in his mind. It had pulled at least some kind of reaction from Hunter, so maybe it would work even better this time. They rehearse it few times. Hunter doesn't really care when Sebastian disappears for few hours. He just sits on his bed or goes for a walk. It's sad and infuriating to watch. 

"What if it doesn't work?" Sebastian panics to Jeff right before their performance. It's their smallest audience ever, though. Only Hunter is sitting on one of auditorium's plush benches, his face as apathetic as usually. Fingers are wrapped around Sebastian's wrist tightly. "Then we'll figure out something else", Jeff just tells. Maybe his trust is fake, but Sebastian appreciates it anyway. "Once a Warbler, always a Warbler. You aren't alone in this anymore. Just lead us to the stage. Like in good old times."

Sebastian does as he was told. It's like a damn time machine, someone had even bought them bunch of blazers, so when lights blind his eyes for a moment, Sebastian can pretend he is still seventeen, in love and so sure about himself and world around him. It's good to perform with them again. Maybe it's not as smooth as years ago, but they are still good. Years haven't faded their clear talent.

When additional figure appears in front of him, Sebastian stumbles with the steps. He had been taken by a moment, so getting back to reality doesn't happen immediately. It's Hunter, who now hugs him with one arm, bringing his free hand to Sebastian's face. Thumb draws lines of his lips and jaw and for the first time for months Sebastian feels truly connected with his husband. He doesn't dare to say a word, maybe it's just a momentary thing, maybe he has to accept that Hunter is too scarred to find a route back to Sebastian. 

"Seb", he croaks, voice hoarse and sensitive. "Oh Seb. I'm so sorry." Now Sebastian raises his own hand to Hunter's neck, pressing his body against familiar warmth. 

"You don't have to be sorry." 

Kiss is full of salty tears. 


	62. Hurricane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It’s Smythe’s soulmate, he has arrived, and only in few seconds Hunter’s whole world would burn."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I started with [this](http://otpdisaster.tumblr.com/post/119017533255/your-otp-living-in-a-world-where-soulmates-are), but like usually, result was something bit different.

Hunter used to adore idea of soulmates, it felt safe to know that there would be a girl only for him, waiting for Hunter’s arrival in her life. It was before he met Sebastian Smythe. Sebastian came in his life like a hurricane, dusted corners of his mind, and reminded Hunter that being alive is only really important thing. Rest he could figure out on the way. Maybe he hopes it would be Smythe. It's just so simple with him. 

Smythe’s kisses are electric and his hands gentle in their roughness. His his eyes have deepest shade of green Hunter has ever seen. He is beautiful, intelligent and funny, can challenge Hunter every day, but also knows when he needs slowness, silence and little kisses. But Sebastian isn’t Hunter’s soulmate, both of them know that. It would have been sensed long time ago, and even though there is connection between them, that one special sparkle is missing.

Hunter is there when Kurt Hummel steps in the picture. They are doing homework, table is covered in papers, textbooks and notebooks. Sebastian’s notes are written in his messy scrawling while Hunter’s tiny, neat hand-writing is organized with coloured titles. It’s raining heavily and just few minutes ago Sebastian had brought two new cups of coffee without saying a word. He had put Hunter’s cup next to his right hand and pressed a kiss on top of his head. It was a simple gesture, told everything about Sebastian’s feelings without cheesy comments.

Suddenly his dark head is up, Sebastian is almost shaking, his dark eyes scanning crowded coffee shop. “He is here”, he whispers. _Who?_ Hunter almost asks before he understands what’s happening. It’s Smythe’s soulmate, he has arrived, and only in few seconds Hunter’s whole world would burn.

They spot blue-eyed boy on same moment. He is tall and kinda slender, has perfect porcelain skin and curious look on his face. Unknown boy steps closer, coffee cup totally forgotten in his hand. Sebastian gets up, muttering quick sorry to Hunter. Not more than that. One word to cover his broken heart. Like their months together would mean nothing.

A kiss surprises Sebastian’s soulmate, but recovery is fast enough. He whimpers against Hunter’s boyfriend’s lips, melts in the touch so naturally. Boys don’t notice his coffee which is dropped on the shiny floor. Smell of hot liquid makes him slightly nauseous when Hunter gets up and hurries outside. He shoves some tiny girl on the way, but doesn’t stop to say sorry. For once he has to be allowed to forget mask of perfect student, perfect boy, perfect soldier.

Sebastian’s car keys are still in his pocket, and maybe Hunter shouldn’t do it. He knows that car is Sebastian’s pride and Hunter may be bit too upset to drive safely. But it’s also easiest way to get away from that situation. Hunter can’t take it right now, he wouldn’t be able to handle them holding hands, bodies pressed together and apologetic smiles.  “Hunter, babe. We had a good run, but he is mine now, it’s just biology. You can’t say no to your basic instincts.”

When Hunter turns around one more time, silly hope in his chest, there isn’t a running figure, no yelled apologies or promises that Hunter would be only one, that pretty boy wouldn’t change a thing. 

Dalton is only safe haven around, Hunter doesn’t know any other place where he could curl up and fight against tears. Sooner or later people around him would want to know why big guy like him is weeping so pathetically.

But at school he doesn’t know where to go. Their room is too obvious place, there he couldn’t hide from Sebastian. Hunter is stepping back and forth at the main hall, too nervous to decide. Then one of his Warblers appears. Jeff notices his rapidly blinking eyes and tense shoulders. “What happened?” he asks, and serious tone in his voice tells that a lie isn’t an option.

“Sebastian’s soulmate happened”, Hunter tells, barely moving his lips. “He is beautiful like a fucking swan or something. I cant’ compete with him.” Hunter is fighting with the blade of tears, he hasn’t cried for ten years and isn’t definitely starting now. 

Jeff is surprisingly compassionate. He doesn’t offer sassy comments about it how even trying a relationship with any other person than his actual soulmate was kinda futile. He is just there with Hunter, covers him with kind silence and pets his hair. Dark dorm room makes him calmer. Maybe everything isn't lost, Hunter could collect pieces of himself even after this.

“Don’t care about it. There will be a boy or a girl who is going to make you so happy. Your soulmate is a lucky person, I can tell that. You are going to be an awesome boyfriend.”

After seeing their empty room it doesn't take long from Sebastian to figure out where he is. Hunter had apparently fallen asleep, he hears voices just vaguely and there isn't Jeff's comforting warmth behind him.

“Seb, sweetie. You have to understand that Hunter doesn’t want to talk with you right now. His heart was ripped out of his chest, this just isn’t a good moment. Maybe in few days when he has calmed down”, Jeff explains in soft and reasonable voice. His arm is in front of Sebastian, keeping him from stepping in the room.

“No, you don’t know everything. I have to speak to Hunter, he has to know. I’m so fucking sorry about that kiss, but we didn’t do anything else.” Hunter can almost sense it how Jeff is getting softer. Sebastian is his best friend, Hunter is only option B, so of course blond boy would like to believe Sebastian.

Let him in”, he finally gives a permission. Hunter would be forced to face Sebastian and his empty explanations anyway, so better to do it right now. Jeff is nervous presence behind slightly taller boy, his eyes travelling from Sebastian to Hunter and back to Sebastian. “Is it wise to leave you two alone? I don’t want to have blood stains everywhere.”

"I promise it's not going to escalate, but if that happens, we can go outside", Sebastian smiles tiredly. Hunter sits up when other boy takes a seat on Jeff's desk chair. "He doesn't want me or us", he begins making Hunter snort shortly. "Don't talk bullshit. He is your damn soulmate. It's not about wanting things."

"It's a truth. If you don't believe me, I got his phone number. He is called Kurt." Dreamy look in his eyes scares Hunter, but Sebastian's words tell a different story. "He is sexy, passionate, hell of a kisser. I don't lie, it would be good with him. But Kurt is flames and fire, such a phoenix. I think in the end there would be only ash, we would burn out together. But you are different, you are my calm, cool lake. I can see myself growing old with you. Maybe you will have different feelings about your soulmate, but until that I'd like to play with these cards we already have if you only agree with me."

Someone reports them. Hunter can’t believe it when he is reading official letter. They are really invited to explain why there aren’t real soulmates around. “How someone can be so petty?” he asks Sebastian who has just opened door to their apartment. His boyfriend takes his jacket off and comes to check the letter with a frown on his handsome face. “Don’t worry, gorgeous. They can’t put us in jail because of this.

"But what if they force you to live with Kurt? What am I going to do then?" Hunter asks, suddenly worried about whole situation. Last years had been good, they don't have soulmates' perfect harmony, but they have built a great life together. Maybe they are fighting bit more often than those soulmate couples whose biggest arguments are something like "Should we buy oranges or apples or both?", but talking takes them through all of it. It's important to talk, to be aware of his partner's feelings, that way they can keep this relationship working. 

"Kurt isn't even in the country. It's not that easy for them. It's you and me, babe, like always. Trust me and us."

There is a tight-looking middle-aged woman waiting for them in the office. Hunter had wanted to break the ice with some light comment but after seeing the situation keeping his mouth shut looks better option.

“So. Mr. Smythe. I have been given information that you met your soulmate, mr. Kurt Hummel about five years ago. Why aren’t you living with him?

Sebastian squirms on his chair, but Hunter’s hand on his knee stops it. It’s hard to believe that people have guts to doubt their relationship. Maybe they aren’t soulmates, maybe they have to work a little harder to read each other, but they have always done their best for this relationship.

“I’m texting with him. Sometimes”, he comments, voice tight and words short. Now Hunter pinches him lightly, he knows Sebastian’s short temperament and even though he was right – not living with your soulmate isn’t illegal, Hunter is pretty sure that this woman could give them some problems anyway if they weren’t nice enough.  

“Texting? With your soulmate? You should be planning a future together, not behaving like distant cousins.”

Sebastian shrugs. "We don't want to be together. He has a boyfriend, I have one too. We are happy. I think it's private and government should have something more important to do than mess with these things. Being with your soulmate isn't vitally important, after all."

“Are you ever wondering where your soulmate is?” Sebastian asks quietly. Hunter had been almost sleeping, but now he groans, turning around to face Sebastian, who is laying on his back, face concerned. When he is actually awake, Hunter doesn't know how he managed to sleep. Curtains are open, bringing lights of the city in their bedroom. It's too bright to sleep. “You should have met already. You are almost 30, it’s very rare to be still alone.”

“I’m not alone”, Hunter mumbles. He pushes closer and his needy appearance makes Sebastian take a hint. Both of them sigh happily when Sebastian’s arm is around Hunter’s shoulders. He also pulls blankets to cover them better before finishing an answer to his fiancé's question. “I have you. Best of all. How could I be disappointed?”

“Do you have any regrets?” Hunter asks on their wedding day when he is dancing with his new husband. It had been a small event, all people don’t still get them. They find it almost insulting that Sebastian and Hunter dare to be happy, and explore world without their soulmates. Best understanding they had received from Kurt Hummel, who had sent an expensive gift and a card. Sebastian nuzzles his neck and gives a light kiss on his jaw. They are breathing same air when his answer is given. “No.”


	63. Your kiss is a soul saver, my favorite flavor, want it now and later (1/2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [link](http://brightsummernights7cf.tumblr.com/post/120627653810/royalty#permalink-notes)
> 
>  
> 
> If you are interested, I guess Thomas Rhett's "Get me some of that" is a "theme song" for this one. Title from same song.

Two horses are walking slowly in the high, thick grass. It’s still early, sun is just raising, pushing golden rays through thin morning fog. Hunter knows it’s frustrating for them both, Sebastian and his gray mare, Angel. Hot-blooded Angel moves gracefully, they should be on the track, jumping fences or taking a nice, fast gallop on the field, not here with Hunter and one of the most boring horses of royal stables.

He has been riding with Sebastian for ten years, more or less regularly, so Hunter has learned some tips on the way, and isn’t anymore just a nervous ball around horses, but his real athletic talents are elsewhere. Choosing Hunter’s horse personally is one of Sebastian’s ways to show that he cares. Hunter is used to ride boring horses, but at least them are always stylish animals, making him look like a fucking professional. Now he is on the saddle of Arrow, big bay who has energetic, moving ears and brisk steps. He couldn’t be trained better, Arrow is one of Sebastian’s own projects, and that’s why dark-haired man sees bay as a safe horse for Hunter. 

“I don’t want you to do these trips with her. Distract her somehow, with new purse or some other shit, but don’t take her to ride. This has been one of our things.” They don’t have very many own things. Sebastian wandered to royal stables ten years ago, when he was only twelve years old. Feisty kid followed workers around, annoyed them with his endless comments and questions, and he was soon allowed to help with easier horses so they could keep him quiet even for few minutes. 

Sebastian knew what he wanted. Clear talent was recognized, and he climbed higher and higher with predator’s patience. When Sebastian’s predecessor retired, it was possibly Hunter who suggested hiring young man. Losing his best friend was out of question even though at that point they were much more than just friends.

There was lots of attitude around in their first, official meeting. Sebastian was too proud to bow or use respective names. He just stared at Hunter curiously and asked that question as bluntly as possible. “Who are you?” That almost earned him a slap from one of the older workers, but Hunter stopped that with a short gesture. “It doesn’t matter.” He was two years younger than Sebastian, and in his eyes older kid was something exciting, completely irrational in the protected world of crown prince. 

Five years ago rules banged in his head when Sebastian kissed him with hot lips, his curious finger under Hunter’s thin shirt.  _First kiss is for your wife. Stay pure and clean. Sex belongs to marriage._ With Sebastian first kiss wasn’t an achievement, it just happened, simple touch of lips made him crave more. First touches of other person were overwhelming, suddenly Hunter wanted everything, and Sebastian’s smile was slightly smug when crown prince panted against his shoulder. 

“No, sweetheart”, he replied, palm of his hand pressed against Hunter’s crotch. “We aren’t going to do all of that now. I know you are getting hot for me, and it’s such a honor, but you would regret it later. You are one of those sweeties who want to learn to know their partner before moving to really delicious things.” 

For Sebastian he was an exception. He could have gotten almost any guy, Sebastian used to have quite a reputation in closest city, but for some reason he stayed loyal for Hunter, waited for him also in times of doubts, when Hunter tried to think about cute girls and become an absolute straight. 

Until his 20th birthday it has been kinda simple. Sebastian isn’t exactly one of important kids, as a leader of royal stables he is still just a servant for his parents, but their so called friendship is still warmly accepted. Like his mother said so sweetly. “Spending time with people from lower classes can be an educational experience.” Those words were like bile in Hunter’s mouth but he swallowed them anyway. That comment was a permission to spend time with boy who had stolen his heart so easily.

But after his birthday festivities things have changed. Hunter is supposed to be an adult now, and wife is an essential part of his adult life. Handling it could be slightly more possible if his future marriage was about love, friendship and shared respect, but it would be more like a business deal. His parents, king and queen of the country have chosen group of girls, and among them he is supposed to find a pleasant wife. Personal opinion of that girl wouldn't be so important. 

Hunter lets out a deep sigh, patting Arrow’s neck lightly. “How about if it was you I wanted to marry?” Sebastian laughs, bitter and deep, but not absolutely unfriendly. His horse takes few restless steps and Hunter watches with adoring eyes how Sebastian reminds her who is in charge.

“It would be a dream come true, gorgeous. But we both know the facts. Your whole nation is waiting for you to marry some pretty, young noblewoman. I’m young and pretty, and better fuck than any of those girls – I’m not sure if you can get it up with a female, but my blood isn’t blue enough for you.”

He wants to kiss sadness away from the corners of his mouth. Sebastian is usually definition of pure confidence, these moments when he shows even some vulnerability are really rare. “I suppose you have understood that I’m not staying? I have my table full of offers from other stables, I can choose my favourite option and just go. You know, your precious mother asked me months ago to lead your fucking wedding parade. Me and Angel, and ten other guys with black horses. How am I supposed to find them? She thinks my life isn’t anything besides horses. I hate her. But it’s okay because I’m absolutely sure she also hates me.”

Sebastian is rambling very untypically and that’s why Hunter stops Arrow, who is so obedient and just stands still when Hunter leaves him and walks towards other horse. Sebastian looks like he is ready to encourage his horse to gallop and ditch whole uncomfortable situation.

“Let me kiss you.” Hunter offers his best puppy eyes, it’s selfish, completely selfish, he knows that, but right now he can’t offer better than this illusion that anything wouldn’t be broken. He is allowed to do that even though Sebastian backs off very soon. They are in the safety of trees and their thick branches but someone could still spot crown prince of the country kissing one of palace’s workers.

“You can go, Hunt. I’ll take Arrow. Your mom is probably waiting for you to another meeting about your future wife. I’ll see you later.”

Sebastian is right. After changing his clothes and a quick shower Hunter is already sitting in plush armchair, table in front of him covered in glossy photos. In all of them smiles some pretty girl whose parents have decided that a crown prince could be a good marriage.

“So, who do you like?” his possibly well-meaning mother asks. “I don’t want to pressure you, dear, but I’d like to invite some of the girls to meet you for the summer.”

That gives a rough schedule for the popping of his and Sebastian’s little bubble. No more than six weeks. They would have time for long goodbyes. Hunter scans pictures, trying to find something, anything to say. “She is red-head”, he finally comments. “I don’t like it.” Small smile from his mother feels almost triumphant. For few next days he would be left alone because Hunter had made at least small progress with this issue.


	64. your kiss is a soul saver, my favorite flavor, want it now and later (2/2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Previous chapter for info.

Hours later Sebastian's small cottage is completely dark, he hasn't returned from work yet. But hiding place of his spare key has been familiar for Hunter for years. He takes the key and then just strips when door is closed behind him. Hunter sniffs, he doesn't have any intentions to ruin their last moments with negative emotions and weeping, but that would ask finding control before Sebastian's return. 

Clothes form a line towards Sebastian's bedroom. Hunter smiles at familiar, pleasant smell and pictures and ribbons on the walls. Timelines on the walls show Sebastian's whole process as a rider, and every time when he had returned with colourful ribbon, Hunter had felt a sting of nostalgia. He would have given his left arm to be there, rooting for his boyfriend and kissing lips of the winner. 

Bed is too inviting with it's soft, worn cotton bedsheets. Hunter falls there, is already almost sleeping when his head hits the pillow. There is his safety and touch of slow fingertips doesn't make him flinch when it's time to wake up. Sebastian pulls covers away revealing all that naked skin, and Hunter inhales sharply when slickness of his fingers brushes his ass. “You are horribly tense, my gorgeous”, Sebastian’s voice is low, concerned. He speaks against Hunter’s back, paints line of his spine with little kisses.

Hunter doesn’t reply. His legs are just spread properly as an invitation for Sebastian who isn’t that easy to trick away from challenging topic. “Are you okay? It’s always delightful to see naked, royal ass in my bed, but I’m not going to fuck you if you are really upset.”

Now Hunter turns around, offers his open arms pleading Sebastian’s closeness. “I’m not more upset than typically nowadays. Please, Sebastian. I know this is coming to an end, but that isn’t hopefully happening today.”

After that Sebastian’s weight presses him in mattress deliciously. Narrow bed squeaks, when he is taken slowly and so sweetly. A pillow muffles his mumbling, it’s not right time for light-headed confessions of love. Hunter almost cries under his lover when Sebastian tortures him, every time when he is approaching the edge, he is pulled back and in the end Hunter doesn’t know what he is begging. “Bas, please”, he moans.

Every single muscle in his body seems to be relaxed after Sebastian has pulled him through an orgasm. Teeth are buried in the soft skin of his shoulder and Sebastian’s breath is wet in his ear. “How can I give up this? You are always going to be mine. She can get everything, fairytale wedding, life with you, kids and family and everything, but I don’t think she gets you so completely like me. I’m only one who can fix you when you come here looking for comfort, your little face sad and vulnerable. Those mornings when you stay for breakfast are my most precious treasure. You are barely awake, my schedule has always been bit too much for you. But there you are, having coffee and fruits just to give us a change to spend morning together. It feels like real world wouldn’t exist. I have this silly dream on those moments, you have my ring on your finger and this whole royalty-issue isn’t our problem.”

Because of that story Hunter decides to fight. He says goodbye with light kisses and peaceful looks and twelve hours later he is shaking in front of his father, most important man of the country. It doesn't go well. He uses horrible names of Sebastian, promises to give him lots of problems. Even words like jail and assault are mentioned, but Hunter manages to stop that. "He is completely innocent. I wanted it. I love men", he repeats it few times without worrying about his father's desperately red face. 

"Do you think any of those respectable young women wants to marry you when they hear that you aren't clean? You have basically allowed that boy to ruin future of this country." Hunter can't help laughing at that, but his father isn't convinced by reasonable arguments, he doesn't give a fuck about young adults who could be relieved to see that their future leader loves men. 

“I’m going to make a compromise with you, son.” King’s big fist hits wooden table and tone of his voice make shivers run across Hunter’s spine. His father has always been a strict, serious man, but Hunter hasn’t ever been actually afraid of him. Before this there wasn’t a reason, he was always humble, responsible and obedient, perfect candidate to continue his father’s work with this country.

A lonely picture is thrown on the table, Hunter catches it right before it would be dropping on the floor. There is a smiling boy in the photo, thick stylish hair, big eyes and pale skin. Kurt Hummel, Hunter knows him. They have met at weddings and funerals, and even though they have literally nothing in common, Kurt has always been kind. He is French, speaks English with thick accent, is sophisticated, educated and has grown up in the same world with Hunter.

He would be fading, almost dying in the trap of the palace and marriage. Hunter couldn’t ever do it to him. His simple reply causes more yelling and insulted faces. 

Judging looks aren't enough to damage his happiness on the day when he is given an official permission to marry Sebastian Smythe. It's a small victory, but victory anyway. Family ring is out of question. He isn’t allowed to give one of heirlooms to Sebastian. Like it would stop Hunter at his point. Even though they are breaking all ancient rules, Hunter wants to keep some traditions. It’s pretty futile because Sebastian’s small, smug grin tells that he knows what will happen after their long dinner. After delicious chocolate cake and some coffee Hunter is already on his knee in front of his lover.

He hasn’t prepared a fancy speech, there are no cheesy comments or sugary compliments. Two rings are simple question, Sebastian knows meaning of them. “If you are sure about this, making you my husband would mean everything to me. If you don't like the rings, we can choose others.”

“You have two of them. I don’t know. I always thought that if this happened, I would be the one wearing ring, your trophy, pretty arm candy to show off.”

Hunter tilts his head, taking Sebastian's hand in his own. Ring would get along with it fabulously. His choice hadn't been too ambitious. "And even with this idea of our possible marriage you were still ready to be mine?" he asks, confused. 

"Well, I didn't seem to have other way to be with you. From that perspective it wasn't so horrible idea.”

“Am I really supposed to wear a crown?” Sebastian asks with a frown. Hunter’s assistant is patient with him, assures young man with his dashing smile before showing crown. “You are going to be a husband of our crown prince. Crown is necessary in certain official meetings and other events.” It's really simple, only a decoration against Sebastian's dark hair. Hunter's own is much more detailed and complicated.

“Can I still say no, Hunt?” It’s kinda amusing to look at. Hunter has seen Sebastian on the saddle of wildest and most stubborn animals. He has been thrown to the ground and riding has broken at least five of his bones. Theoretically this shouldn’t be a big deal for him, but brunette looks suspicious, like crown would be little, dangerous animal. “I’m here, baby. Like I promised. I’m not going anywhere and you are my number one priority right now. Everything else can wait. I know this is new for you.”

"I know, Hunt. It's okay. All of this is okay as long as I don't have to face it alone."

“Look at your parents. Did they eat lemons as breakfast?” Sebastian’s poker face is perfect when he makes that almost innocent question. It’s priceless, would ensure Hunter’s popularity when his father would give up his current position. He and Sebastian are starting something new, really bringing this country to the modern world. It’s a perfect timing from him when wedding photographer steps in front of them. Kiss on his cheek spreads pretty, untypical blush on Sebastian's skin. 


	65. Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You are still my legal husband, one ring can't change that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My original inspiration was on one of those otp prompts-blogs, but I couldn't find it anymore :P

In his memories Sebastian has two naive kids. It was almost too much that Hunter left straight after their wedding – chocolate cake, white roses, the sea – and only twenty friends, because their families didn't ever realize what they saw in each other. ”He is so uptight, is he even out to all people?” Stacey, Sebastian's sister asked, suspicious, surprisingly judging, even though she used to be Sebastian's most important support in biggest decisions of his life. With Hunter's family it was much worse. Sebastian had prepared carefully, reminded himself to keep his sharp tongue in check, was ready to do his best so he could be given even a change. But suddenly his boyfriend was standing in front of him, arms protecting Sebastian from violence. Bill Clarington didn't like their news at all.

Later Sebastian took care of his swollen cheek with ice and soft towel, peppered Hunter's face with little kisses and promised that he wouldn't give up. They wouldn't need acceptance from so narrow-minded people. Two of them would be enough, Sebastian would have Hunter's back in every possible situation.

But sharpest, most lively memory is their last day together. Hunter looked serious but handsome in his official uniform and Sebastian couldn't stop kissing him. Touches were wet and shaky, almost clumsy even though kissing him was familiar, at that point they had spent four years together, and almost every day was filled with loving touches and little gestures that showed importance of other person. Sebastian didn't know how to let go, but in the end it was his brave, little fighter who pulled away gently and pressed last, chaste kiss on his forehead. ”Days will pass soon. Then we are again together”, he promised in firm voice, gold of his wedding ring warm and heavy in the morning sunshine.

Getting back together took two years. When he got a call about Hunter's disappearance, Sebastian didn't bother to be surprised. It was only natural continuum in his life that when he was finally happy, most precious part of it was seized away. ”What do you want me to do?” he asked at nigh aloud, terrifying images and wine bottle as his only friends.  

There wasn't an answer, Sebastian was rather sure that Hunter had already crossed the line, left him behind despite their promise to be always together, back against back. ”He wouldn't want to see your losing your grip of life”, Jeff said wisely few days later. He had arrived in a hurricane of chocolate, suitcases, comforting hugs and kisses, and Sebastian hadn't really known how good friends he owned. He was kept afloat, Jeff didn't allow his most restless acts, and even though he didn't agree about Sebastian's decision to still wear his wedding ring, an argument was forgotten. 

”Your husband has been found, mr. Smythe.” Sebastian wasn't prepared for that when he accepted a phone call from an unknown number. Those words make him sit down, collapse on the floor causing so loud thumb that even person on the other end of the line hears it. ”Is everything all right?”

Nothing is all right. Sebastian is ready to jump in a cab and take next possible flight out of the country. He is stunned and numb, too nervous to be really excited. Fingers of his right hand find his left arm, and then he pinches himself almost violently, wanting to know if this is just a horribly precious dream. Sebastian blinks, doesn't wake up in his own single bed. It's real. Hunter has been found and he is alive.

"We are bringing him next week. His condition has been really weak, I think he had a great motivation to stay alive, very many people don't have that much simple will power.”

Sebastian didn't know what to wait, but it's still slightly confusing. There is just a small figure under his thick covers. Hunter's head seems to be sinking in his blue pillow and Sebastian swallows a lump from his throat when he sees shaved head and tight-looking cheeks. ”Can I go there?”

”Of course. That's why you are here.”

Hunter doesn't twitch when door to his room is opened. He is still sleeping steadily, looking peaceful despite his damaged looks. Somehow Sebastian wouldn't want to distract that peace, it's clear to everybody who sees him that last two years have been less than pleasant.  

”Hunt, babe?” he finally asks, crack in his voice. Sebastian finds a wooden chair in the corner of the room and pulls it next to Hunter's bed. He stirs, fingers moving restlessly on blanket's striped pattern. ”Sebastian?” It's just a whisper, his lips look chapped and uncomfortably dry, so glass of water is really welcome. Hunter can't drink a lot before hammering couch attacks his body.

His name is repeated when couching ends, they don't seem to know what to do with each other. But in the end Sebastian just leans in Hunter's personal space. Blue eyes are staring at him carefully, making Sebastian do something what he hasn't ever considered needed with this man. He asks a permission to kiss him. It's given.

”I'm sorry about that this”, Hunter explains, hand wiping his mouth. ”You have probably continued your life, maybe you have a new boyfriend, but they didn't really have anybody else to call.”

Shake of his head brings uncontrolled tears in Hunter's blue eyes. ”Can I hold you?” Brunette snuggles in hospital bed, he is almost afraid of contact of their bodies, because Hunter is so skinny, like he would be made of glass. At so many nights Sebastian has fallen asleep his mind full of pictures of these arms which used to hold him so tightly and safely, but right now Hunter is too weak even to that simple act. His hands are like kitten's paws on Sebastian's body.

Sebastian turns around, embracing Hunter who puts his head on his husband's chest. Their bodies still meet so easily, and a brief flash of heat warms Sebastian's abdomen when he thinks about how sex would go. But they aren't there yet. It would be long road to go before Hunter would be ready for that level of intimacy.

”I lost my wedding ring. I'm so fucking sorry”, he weeps, surprisingly emotional about that thing. Sebastian just pets his bald head, wedding ring last worry in his mind. ”You went through a hell, babe. You are still my legal husband, one ring can't change that.”

Two years ago he said goodbye to a man who wasn't the one for physical closeness, Hunter wanted always action. Often it was sex but he also loved those days when they worked out together, went to the gym or ran in the park. But now Sebastian finds himself very often on the sofa, in the nest of blankets and pillows. He is sitting, Hunter's head on his thighs or they are holding each other. Sometimes he reads books aloud. Sebastian's voice gets dry and strained, but he can't stop when Hunter is listening so attentively, tears of disbelief in his eyes.

He is often anxious. Maybe Sebastian should find it bothering how Hunter is almost all the time glued to him, at breakfast table, in the car, in the grocery store. There is always hand on the small of his back or on his arm, but if those little touches make him happy, Sebastian isn't going to say anything.

They don't talk about those months. Hunter goes to his therapy, has long sessions where he probably cries and rants, tells all kind of dark secrets. But their apartment they are trying to fill with positive atmosphere and light emotions.

He has fears. Sebastian couldn't ever stop adoring his mental strength, but this Hunter isn't same. When thunder storm begins while he is at work, Sebastian knows immediately that he is forced to drop everything and just go. He breaks at least three speed limits on the way, but it was necessary, Sebastian decides when he sees Hunter's condition. He is swaying back and forth on their bed, blue eyes blind from some inner fear.

”I'm here”, Sebastian whispers, lips almost touching softness of the borderline of his short hair and skin. Hunter leans against him, his mind is still processing difference between reality and his inner world, but movement of his body tells that Sebastian doesn't need to be worried. He would be okay in the end.  


	66. Nothing to be afraid of

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anybody doesn’t get a right to touch his tattoos, his guardian angels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I just can't get enough of these soulmate AU-things.  
> [link](http://groanlester.tumblr.com/post/94395639239/au-where-you-have-a-stripe-of-your-soulmates)  
> Borrowed title from One Direction.

They were born on the same day, and exactly thirteen years later, 3.43 am they get their soulmate tattoos. Sebastian’s is a shadow of a cat, golden mark on his stomach. His soulmate’s best friend is a fluffy ragdoll cat, he is soft like a small cloud when he is laying on Hunter’s stomach after especially distressing discussion with his father. Cat probably senses tense atmosphere around his owner, Hunter’s short fingernails are marking skin of his hands, when he is trying to stop tears. On those moments his soulmate tattoo is only thing which keeps Hunter sane. 

Even though it’s so silly. It’s a perfect, coloured flag of France on his calf. He is always secrectly relieved that it’s so easy to hide. Mocking Hunter about his “lack of manliness” is already his father’s favourite hobby, he is pretty sure that seeing tattoo would be murderously hilarious. Of course he has asked questions _"Did you get it? Is it something appropriate?"_ Hunter just muttered something vague, but it didn't matter. His father wasn't really interested. Sometimes at night, when his skins is stinging and covered in colourful bruises, Hunter’s hand is pressed against his bare calf. He has filled his head with images where life is finally peaceful, pressure and stress are dropped from his shoulders and every morning he is waken up with kisses and good mornings.

Sebastian gets a new cat every year. He hopes to meet his soulmate preferably sooner than later, because that would probably stop development of his tattoos. Right now tattoos make him look exotic, both genders, boys and girls are examining his body on the beach, eager to get their lips on his skin, but he isn’t willing to know what he would look like covered in twenty or thirty pictures. 

Anybody doesn’t get a right to touch his tattoos, his guardian angels. Sebastian doesn’t care about skin brushing against skin unintentionally in the heat of the moment, but when they are trying to map route of his cats with their lips, he pulls away, even gets out of the bed if he is pissed enough. 

Hunter hears about new guy two weeks before his arrival. He is one of few guys living alone, so he is asked to make room for other guy, newcomer from Europe. Word Europe is like a little electric shock inside of him – His soulmate tattoo is in his mind all the time – but Hunter doesn’t assume too much about that. He needs also a guide to Dalton life, somebody who would help him to adjust to boarding school, and Hunter finds himself saying yes before actual question is even asked. But that’s his nature, tendency to help and please authorities.

When Hunter opens door to his room after stressful day, headache ready to attack behind his forehead, first thing he sees is a pretty ass in typical Dalton slacks. Guy had been playing with Hunter’s white Persian cat, and that’s interesting, because usually Artemis avoids unknown people as much as possible. Hunter adopted him from animal shelter, tiny fluffy ball meowed until he was picked up to Hunter's lap. He likes to hide under Hunter’s bed behind his book box and stash of dusty porn magazines. Hunter had really tried, but he is pretty sure this guy is more attractive for him than any of those sexy women. 

He turns around, brushing his hands to his pants. Then his right hand is offered to Hunter with a charming, confident smile. His eyes have a shade of foggy forest and Hunter almost freezes to adore them, but then guy’s voice distracts him. It’s lazy and sophisticated, words bring hotness on Hunter’s cheeks.

“Oh dear. Maybe I have to write a letter of thanks to my father. Suddenly boarding school looks much less idiotic than I thought.”

Those deep eyes study his whole body thoroughly before their fingertips touch. That scares Hunter who is ready to pull away and think again, but other guy takes a tight grip of his hand. It’s almost bone-crushing, he is serious about this. They don’t even know each other’s names and here they are, forming a permanent soulmate bond.

“Where is it?” he asks, eyes feverish and few pearls of sweat on his forehead. Hunter sits on his bed before pulling his pant leg up. Brunette looks almost scared to touch, but it feels only right when his fingers slide on Hunter’s warm skin. “It’s so pretty”, he whispers.

"I was born in France. I miss it terribly already. Gonna be back for Christmas. Maybe I'll take you with me." 

“Can I see yours?” Hunter’s voice sounds nervous even though he is asking birthright. He never imagined that this would happen with a boy, there were secret, hidden desires, but he anyway always thought that his soulmate would be a female, quiet, cute, harmless and horribly boring. This dark-haired, happy-eyed sexy human being would be far from boring.

Hunter doesn’t know where to look at when other boy starts unbuttoning his white shirt. He had waited for some easy place, an arm, skin under the collar of his shirt or maybe a calf, same place where Hunter’s tattoo is, not so much bare skin. He strips easily, boy isn’t self-conscious or avoiding Hunter’s curious eyes.  He reveals nice chest and flat stomach and even though it’s delightful sight, Hunter is more fascinated by his cats. Them cover brunette’s upper body, one of them is dangerously low, half of it hidden under his pants. Brunette smirks knowing exactly how damn good he looks.

“It’s not a problem if you want to see also rest”, he winks, happy sparkle in his eyes. Hunter isn’t ready. He is attracted to this boy, it’s much more complicated feeling than simple sexual want, but the idea to get naked, kiss and bite and mark and moan, and become one is still too overwhelming. 

Later in the evening, when Hunter twitches at raised arm, Sebastian sees through him so easily. Also Hunter’s eyes are full of pictures, beautiful brunette girl in a thin, turquoise summer dress. She has Sebastian’s colours and same elegant way to move. Then galloping horse and a boy sitting on the sand. Hunter feels pain of broken arm in his own body. Paris bathing in the rays of sun.

Sebastian stares at him, and then, so carefully, like he would be approaching a wild, scared horse, other boy puts back of his hand against Hunter’s cheek. “He hit you. How could he do that? You are his son, he is supposed to love and protect you.” It affects Sebastian strongly, because both of them know how Sebastian would react if that happened again. Sebastian would share all of it, no matter how happy he would be, Hunter’s sadness would tie his thoughts together making him nervous mess with one rational thought – a desire to help and comfort his soulmate.

Hunter is usually only relaxed at school, leaving Dalton means demands and presence which is always trying to find new flaws. He meets Smythes, they are dark-haired and ridiculously good-looking. He doesn’t see Carolyn Smythe’s tattoo, but her husband carries a tiny wolf on the back of his hand. When Stacey, Sebastian’s sister appears at the pool in a tank top, he sees bright red rose beneath her long ponytail.

In that big house Hunter allows Sebastian to take off his clothes. Every removed piece of clothing earns him a smiling kiss. It feels silly, but Hunter holds Sebastian there, eager to just feel his smile against his own lips without any more serious intentions. It’s slow, both of them are almost burning from want, but Sebastian wants to make it good. Hunter swallows thickly, his head heavy from emotions when gentle, clearly experienced fingers find his hole. He wants it, his body reacts in right ways, is open and ready to be taken, but it’s still too much. Look in his soulmates green eyes is hurt even though he tries to make situation light. Clearly sex is much easier for Sebastian than for him.

Hunter kisses him comfortingly putting his hand on Sebastian’s neck. “It’s not about you, you are so good. I just don’t think I’m ready yet.” Sebastian presses their foreheads together and Hunter pretends he doesn’t hear quiet sniffle. “I’m silly”, Sebastian whispers. "But I swear, you will never be hurt again. If your father lays even a finger on you. Well, I don't know what I'm going to do, but it won't be anything nice."  


	67. Darling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well, he isn’t a love child of Mila Kunis and Ian Somerhalder, but I guess he is okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another favourite theme besides soulmates.
> 
> Btw. Somebody might want to know that Mila Kunis is one of my personal woman crushes, and I was absolutely devastated when Boone died in Lost.

“Has anybody told you that you are ridiculously attractive?” Pleasant voice is slightly out of breath. In the past Sebastian was used to this kind of guys, nervous guys with puppy dog eyes who wanted to crawl at least in his bed but also in his heart. First option was often appreciated if other person was pretty enough, but Sebastian’s heart belonged only to one person, Sebastian himself.

He turns towards that voice, keeping a careful hand around his glass. He has to understand, nobody uses dark glasses in the dim, erotic light of a bar without a good reason. Sebastian’s friends, two other old Warblers had asked it at least three times. “Are you sure we can go? We’ll dance just a few songs. If some weirdo tries to flirt with you, yell and poke them with your cane, and we’ll come to save you.” Sebastian had laughed, his mood suddenly brighter because of those two dear fools. 

It feels like accident has made his hearing sharper. There is a little, surprised sigh in the air, and he hears it despite loud music. “You don’t have to stay, you know”, he says lightly. “I get it that I’m not most interesting person around. You don’t have to feel sorry.” 

It’s still hard to speak to strangers. With Nick and Jeff it’s somehow natural, they are often in his personal space, poking him with their fingers and elbows, pressing kisses on his cheeks or putting their arms around him. He can sense their warm feelings, there is nothing uneasy in those two young men. 

But reading this new guy is impossible. Sebastian has no idea if sitting down is just politeness, or is he really interested in guy who has to look quite stupid when he is just sitting in the bar without a change to enjoy his evening properly.

 “Are you even pretty?” Sebastian blurts out after few minutes and few common comments. “You know, I used to have quite high standards, and even though I can’t see, I’m not that desperate. My right hand and I have a great relationship.”

His laugh is nice, low and kind. “I think your friends can tell that. Pretty blond and cute, muscular, short brunette are glaring at me. Do they sound familiar?” 

Seconds later they arrive, Jeff pushing himself between Hunter and Sebastian without any extra politeness, and Nick rolling his eyes at his boyfriend. Despite everything Sebastian is a big boy, he doesn’t need to protected like some fragile flower. “So, you haven’t used our advice, so apparently he isn’t biggest creep around”, Jeff comments and steals a sip of Hunter’s drink. His brown eyes are critical.

“Jeff, dear. Just tell me is he attractive and then you can go.”

Jeff snorts, his right arm protectively around Sebastian’s shoulders. He knows there is a rational way to do things, but he doesn’t know this guy, and his mother hen instincts are kicking in. “Well, he isn’t a love child of Mila Kunis and Ian Somerhalder, but I guess he is okay.”

“That didn’t help.”

 Nick would like to facepalm and run away. He truly loves Jeff, but sometimes he can be ridiculously stubborn. “Seb, this dude is beyond hot, lots of beautiful muscle in one of tightest shirts I have ever seen. Kissable lips, pretty eyes and short hair. And he looks at you like he would like to fuck you through the mattress and have cuddles and kisses afterwards.”

Jeff makes an annoyed sound when his arm is seized, but Nick is determined when he pulls other man away. “Jeff, babe. Sebastian was hunting men when we were still too shy to kiss in public. He knows what he is doing.”

Blond besides him steals one more look at other couple before giving his reply. “I know, honey. I’m just worried, I want to keep him safe and happy.” 

“Wow. That was awkward”, Hunter laughs and is kinda grateful that brunette next to him can’t see blush on his face.

“Jeff is bit overprotective. It’s in his nature, I guess. We have been best friends since high school. Hopefully he wasn’t too scary.”

"Not at all."

On their first official date in Sebastian’s favourite pizza place he gets to know how Hunter looks like. His hands are guided to Hunter’s face so carefully, and then other man stays completely still, giving him as much time as he wants. Sebastian is weirdly moved when he follows those beautiful lines with his fingers. He has done this dozens of times with his two best friends, his sister and parents, but with a new person it’s different. "You are fucking gorgeous", he mumbles making Hunter's cheeks red. 

Their dates are all about tastes and music. Hunter takes him to a restaurant after restaurant, seducing him with food so damn easily. “Are you trying to fatten me?” Sebastian laughs when he nibbles cookies. It’s a sunny day, they are having a picnic in Hunter’s favourite park.

“No I’m not, beautiful. It would probably ask at least tripling my efforts. You have gorgeous body.”

With Hunter he is able to find unexpected joy from classical music. He likes to dress up for concerts together, and music is calming, it’s like floating in warm sea when Hunter draws circles on the back of his hand. Sebastian even falls asleep once. He is embarrassed afterwards, but Hunter finds it only adorable.

“I wish I would have had this when I was in hospital”, Sebastian comments later, still hazy and happy from music. Now those fingers take his hand, holding it tightly. “Were you scared or angry?”

 “I was born angry, but having something like this could have prevented so many arguments and lots of tears and sadness. I was hurting people around me even though they just tried to help.”

After his accident Sebastian hasn’t had men in his bed. He feels horribly exposed when he is lying on his back, very aware of eyes which don’t leave his bare body. He isn’t that old, confident Sebastian anymore. Sebastian bends his knees, pressing his legs together. Trembling hands try to cover him from Hunter’s eyes. “I’m sorry... I know I’m skinny and unattractive. This wasn’t a good idea.”

“It has to be terrifying. I can’t understand how it feels”, Hunter tells gently when he sits down, pressing his hand on Sebastian’s stomach. “It’s not equal that I can see everything of you, every single detail of your gorgeous, amazing body. But I’m not going to betray your trust if you give it now. I’ll do my best to worship you in bed.”

Sometimes Hunter brings feathers with him. Sebastian forgets how to breathe when his body is teased with light softness. Ice cubes and cold water on his stomach make him gasp, but then Hunter’s tongue is there, licking those cool stripes. When scarves are introduced, his voice is tender and careful. “I’m not... We can stop immediately if it feels uncomfortable. I know it asks lots of trust, to be bare and let me see everything.”

Sebastian doesn’t exactly like it, but it’s an experience he wouldn’t want to skip. Sex is still rather complicated, so full of messy feelings that sometime his eyes are even teary after an orgasm, and inability to move his hands doesn’t make it easier. But it’s true that he trusts Hunter who wouldn’t ever leave him alone in that condition. Whispered question is asked anyway. “You don’t leave me, right?” Sebatian needs it, power of his calm words and then he can let go and allow Hunter to see, touch and feel.

Months later Hunter makes that confession in breathless, husky voice. “You were my first. First man, I mean.”

It's new. He finds Hunter’s arm with his fingers, draws mindless pictures on his skin. “You seemed to be so confident”, he comments quietly, smiling at the kiss on his cheek.

“I had to be confident. For you. Afterwards I was just grateful that you weren’t hurt. I didn’t really know what I was doing with you and your body.”

He shouldn’t hear it. They are at the party, it’s one of Hunter’s childhood friends who is marrying his long-time girlfriend, and those people think they are far enough. It’s not exactly mean, they are just surprised that he and Hunter have been going so steadily for three years now. _ I don’t know. Hunter is so calm, I always thought he would find someone active, extreme sports or something like that. They could have completed each other.” _  Or actually it’s three years, four months and twelve days. Sebastian hasn’t told any other living soul how precise he likes to be about this exact issue.

His blank eyes are wet behind his glasses when Hunter comes back with new drinks. Someone active, mountaineer, tamer of wild animals, maybe even fucking Olympic athlete, not broken and boring Sebastian Smythe who needs help even in grocery store. That thought brings more and more tears on his cheeks. They are right. Hunter could get better, poor Sebastian is only holding him back.

He hates it that getting a moment of privacy is impossible in an unknown place. Sebastian couldn’t ever find a restroom alone here, and asking an advice would reveal a crack in his voice. Strong fingers touch his jaw, turning his face towards Hunter.

“Is everything all right, babe? I never thought you would be one of those people who cry at weddings.” Light breath tickles his face and then he is kissed, touch almost comforting against his lips. After that Hunter stays close, his arm casually around Sebastian’s waist.

“Do you ever hope that I would be normal?” Sebastian asks, unable to help himself. Hunter is stiff, glaring at his friends who _ just don’t know when to shut up. _ __ “Excuse me, babe. I’ll reply very soon, but I have to have a word with boys before that.”

They see immediately that Hunter is quite pissed. He pushes in the small group, wrinkle on his forehead. “I’m trying to decide is it adorable or creepy that you have energy to be that interested in my love life. But oh god, keep your mouths shut. Sebastian is my lover and my best friend, and right now I don’t see my future without him.” 

Sebastian hears it all, how he doesn't hesitate to defend their relationship, and that makes him feel better. Hunter wouldn't have stayed so long if he wasn't serious about them. When he comes back to their seats, they exchange a light kiss. "I love you, beautiful", Hunter whispers in his ear. 


	68. F.E.E.L. G.O.O.D.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "...I’m proud to call him my boyfriend.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How can I explain this? Well, I spent yesterday evening reading Jeff Schafer/Byron Pike-fics, TBSC-fanfiction gives me weird feeling of nostalgia, and I happen to like shy boys, so that's why this was born, and there isn't ever too much Jeffbastian around. 
> 
> Borrowed title from R5, I have listened to that song a lot lately.

Maybe they don’t have greatest potential, common shameless slut, and gorgeous transfer student, blondie who still has wind in his hair before he brushes it in the morning, and tries to adjust to new place, and new students. “It will go well this time, I promise it honey”, his well-meaning mother comments. “But you could also help. They are taking bullying really seriously here, but maybe your new friends don’t need to know every fact about you. At least not immediately.”

Jeff Sterling snorts. He wouldn’t do this in his parents’ way even though it would cost him more bruises and few new broken bones. Coming out to them hadn’t been a total disaster, but they are always, even after months and more months giving these little hints – everybody doesn’t need to know, and father’s co-worker’s daughter is such a nice girl. There they were right. Anna is such a nice girl, and she was interesting to talk to, especially when Jeff learned that she and her girlfriend had been together for two years. 

Sebastian Smythe is asked to give a tour to new transfer student. He is waiting for a chubby nerd, ghosts of a hangover still hammering his head. Few minutes before arrival of new guy Sebastian pulls his sunglasses from his bag hiding his green eyes behind them. He shouldn't be doing this right now, Sebastian should be in his bed with Netflix and pizza, not here trying to be nice to newest addition of Dalton Academy. 

It's hard to believe his good luck when blond boy with dancer's body and endless legs stops besides him. Sebastian raises his sunglasses to his forehead, throwing a knowing look to other boy. His headache is suddenly less demanding, and whole Monday morning a lot brighter. 

Jeff had hoped nice, neutral welcome, but this is above all his secret wishes. He hasn't ever been checked out by such a gorgeous boy or boy in general. There had been girls, almost scary girls with their blood red nails and too thick perfumes. Jeff had exchanged kisses and then pulled away, when his hand had been guided under thin shirt, to the smooth skin. It had felt so wrong. 

"I hope you are going to enjoy yourself at Dalton", boy smiles at him, showing a mouth full of pearly, white teeth. Jeff shudders pleasantly, if boy's eyes weren't full of warmth, he would feel like a deer in the headlights. 

 ***

When they come to rehearsal holding hands, Sebastian is already ready for those talks. He knows these guys have taken Jeff under their wings and accepts kindly threatening comments from most of them. Their intentions are good, boys only want Jeff to be happy. But he wouldn’t take a lecture from Nick Duval, because Sebastian has his pride too. He had swallowed lots of it for Jeff, but here he wouldn’t get on his knees.

“Shut up. You don’t get to say a thing. Can you really honestly claim that you are worried about me treating Jeff badly, when you didn’t dare to do anything to your big, fat gay crush? You are a coward, you wouldn’t have been worth him. At least I’m proud to call him my boyfriend.”

 ***

Sebastian can’t keep his lust-filled eyes from wandering on Jeff’s body. Idea of taking someone’s virginity is extremely hot for Sebastian, but in practice he has usually avoided boys, who are like Jeff, blushing, innocent and too aware of their every action. Even now, after numerous discussions about this he is still holding back, probably about to close his eyes only because Jeff doesn’t dare to look at Sebastian’s bare upper body.

Even Sebastian, who has done this in every possible way is hesitant above this beauty. He has spread his legs in the back alleys of the bars, and leaned against cold tiles of a common men’s room, not caring about curious looks on his cock and thighs. Sebastian has taken boys with pale eyes and rosy cheeks on expensive sheets, and left next morning after writing a note with kind words, but without a phone number. But all of it is different with Jeff. He is scared to stain this innocence.

“You can look. And touch. Whatever you need. I’m not that fragile, babe”, he makes a promise, trying to lighten suddenly heavy situation. He releases Jeff’s body, lying down beside him. Jeff looks much less tense, familiar curiosity back in his eyes, and Sebastian knows they should do this slower, he could get used to Jeff's reactions, and maybe he wouldn’t die from sexual frustration before midnight.

 Jeff’s lips taste fruity chapstick. They kiss slowly, teeth nipping, tongues exploring, when he draws mindless lines on Sebastian's body, getting used to feeling of other boy. Touch teases him, but Sebastian knows Jeff isn’t doing it on purpose. He has no idea how frustrating it is, when it’s so sweet and good and perfect, but still too little. Sebastian wouldn’t even want to breath, when that touch is suddenly resting on his hip. It’s closer. Blond next to him finds his other hand too, bringing his fingers to the buckle of a leather belt.

Kiss is firm, almost claiming and it gives Jeff something to focus on besides the light pain he is feeling. Sebastian is using all his self-control so he wouldn’t just fuck this gorgeous human being. He still feels tight around his cock, and even though Sebastian used lots of time and patience to prepare him, he had doubts about fitting himself in Jeff’s almost untouched body. 

“Are you good, babe?” he asks, sharing his breath with Jeff whose brown eyes are hazy, he is just lying there, legs open and arms relaxed, fingers chasing fabric under their slick bodies. Jeff blinks once and then again before little, sheepish smile appears on his face. “It’s overwhelming. Don’t hurt me.”

 And Sebastian doesn’t, when he gently thrusts, learning things about Jeff on the way. He isn’t one for dirty talk, at least not yet. Sebastian lets words slip when he is lost in Jeff’s heat, small mold above his navel and white scar on his left side. Those comments make his eyes almost wet, and Sebastian is fast to back off, to apologize at least with a quick sorry. He doesn’t want to ruin this.

When he wants more hesitantly, Jeff doesn’t beg like a slut who has seen everything. There is just a hand squeezing Sebastian’s forearm, and shy words on his swollen lips. “Can you...? I’m almost”, Jeff breathes.

Jeff is biting his lip when is pushed over the edge by Sebastian’s pure skill. Brunette leans closer, nipping his jaw.  “Just let go, gorgeous. I wanna get everything of you.” He gets some of those noises, symbols of Jeff’s lost control. Next time he would get more, maybe it makes him cocky, but Sebastian wants to hear this beautiful boy screaming his name. Jeff belongs to him, and in return Sebastian can be owned too.

Hands are immediately reaching for Sebastian when he pulls out of Jeff, and for the first time that kind of needy gesture is touching, not distressing for him. Blond looks calmer when his salty lips are pecked quickly.

 “I think I’m not going to be pro at sex anytime soon. I’m sore and sticky. It was nice, but I wouldn’t want to do it again immediately.”

 “I’ll wait for you, blondie. I know few tricks where your flexibility is a great benefit.” Sebastian smiles against his shoulder, kisses bare skin before drifting to sleep.

 ***

After that evening Jeff carries himself differently. He notices how men at dusty bar are watching his ass which is covered in tight jeans. Sebastian’s possessiveness is boiling around him, and teeth on his skin make him lose control. Jeff whines, quietly, but whines anyway. He shouldn’t like it, it's so public, those familiar hands on his ass and lower back should make him feel cheap, but it’s only a turn on. “I’m so horny that I couldn’t drive safely”, Sebastian grins, showing his shaky hands. Blond pushes against him, shivering at the hardness in Sebastian’s pants. “I wanna go to your car.”

*** 

“I’m in love with him.” Hunter Clarington blinks lazily, slightly amused by his friend’s clear discomfort. “Telling it me doesn’t help you. When I last time checked, I wasn’t your very pretty and very blond boyfriend.” Sebastian wants to pull his hair, because Hunter isn’t helpful at all. Index finger pokes Hunter’s broad back until he turns around to look at his best friend. “Look. Sterling is serious about you. He isn’t going to disappear even though hearing that big trio would take few more months. He trusts you.”

_(Maybe Sebastian practices few times before actually saying it.)_

 


	69. Tonight looks good on you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Half of the stadium sang Smythe's name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Football World Cup AU. Title from Jason Aldean.

Jeff is already there, restless steps and rapid breathing behind his back when bell rings. Hunter turns around, huge pressure squeezing his shoulders and a big lump making his throat tight. Sterling puts an arm around him, guiding Hunter slowly to the borderline of the pitch,  where they can sit down without caring about celebrating team. Jeff has still energy despite long match in humid evening. He jogs to the bench returning few moments later with few water bottles. Striker sits down and gasps at sudden coolness when he pours half of the first bottle to his blond head and chest. With slight interest Hunter glances at his jersey which is glued to Jeff’s skin by sweat, showing flat and sharp shapes of elegant striker’s body. Without any doubts Jeff Sterling is one of the best players of their young, promising generation, but with those wide, dark eyes and a head full of silky hair he is also a favourite poster boy of every teenager girl.

When their captain was injured at the beginning of second half, and carried away from brightest spotlight of the stadium, it was Jeff who took mental responsibility even though totally other person carried official armband. He encouraged others with his endless bright enthusiasm, when some guys were already giving up, and kept them in the game with two beautiful goals. In the end it just wasn't enough against those blue shirts. They were lacking experience and routine. Furious fighting gave them an opportunity, but it was new superstar of Les Bleus who kicked himself in the history just few minutes before end of the game.

There was a barrier protecting their goal, everybody was just watching the situation and waiting for extra time. Maybe they could have tried again with fresher feet and power of few encouraging comments from their coach. But then Smythe got through, he passed their goalkeeper, and after that watching birth of horribly beautiful goal was only thing they were able to do. Everybody froze, crushing dream about trophy took so short time. Dark-haired striker slid to his knees in front of their fans, and was soon hidden in the pile of his teammates. Half of the stadium sang Smythe's name. 

“We were good, Hunter”, Jeff comments suddenly and spreads himself to the thick, green grass carpet. Blond striker looks calm, he has no regrets. Every single player had left his heart on the pitch. In this tournament they had played for the badge on the front of their national team jersey, every time weirdly cheerful and overwhelmed when somebody dared to remind that this kind of success has been rarity in their country. They had brought down team after team, even old champions, country which had celebrated four years ago was beaten with four goals.  

It hurts now that they wouldn't be kissing trophy today, but Jeff is right. Nobody could have guessed this. Literally nothing was waited from team with lowest average age of whole tournament. They shouldn't be ashamed of themselves, and soon enough those sad faces would be covered with laughter and smiles, cheering from the fans in good, old home country healing all open wounds. There is one hell of a party coming. 

“It’s okay.”

There has been exact reason to it why Hunter likes to spend his time with Sterling, why they have been joined at hip since beginning of the tournament. Theoretically he likes the atmosphere in the different dressing rooms of his life. Hunter doesn’t remember time when he wouldn’t have been there, tying laces of his football shoes or listening to pep talks from his coach.

Especially in national team it’s great. There are six guys from his own club, and that eased things in World Cup. Hunter wouldn’t say it aloud, whole idea sounds so silly and ridiculous, but in his own head he could swear that sometimes sensing his teammates around him is possible. Then Hunter turns his head and Sterling is there, ready to to receive his pretty, low pass and continue building possible goal.

But boys are boys especially in team like theirs where average age is so low. They are very liberal about their nude bodies, and prefer topics like boobs, women and sex in their discussions. All that nakedness makes Hunter tense, and sometimes he just would like to command everybody to wear a towel. It’s tiring to keep himself in control all the time, Hunter couldn’t pay a price of those weirdly longing looks, eyes wandering on smooth muscles and tanned skin. 

Naturally he has a girlfriend too. Or at least in several occasions Hunter has been photographed with beautiful half Russian super model. It has clearly eased his stress, panicky reactions to curious questions from different journalists are only a hazy memory. Sasha got to know his secret in some party where Hunter was too drunk, cornered by his father’s well-meaning questions. “Have you met any nice girls, son?” At that point Hunter had several super nice girls, but he hadn’t ever seen women as potential romantic partners. He wasn't in best mood, ready to spill his dangerous secrets to any willing listener, but Sasha saved the situation and pushed Hunter outside, to the cool night air which seemed to clear his head a bit. "Thank you so much", he mumbled, still trying to understand how he was about to ruin everything, his whole dream life. Sasha giggled, excitement filling her blue eyes. "I think I have an idea."

Hunter was in need of a girlfriend and Sasha saw an opportunity to hide her private life from media, so it was kinda match made in heaven. 

Hunter always passes comments about his girlfriend’s physical excellence with a shy smile and shake of his head. Guys probably think he is an uptight prude, but living with that assumption is possible. When he sees pictures of Sasha in tiny blue and golden underwear on the pages of glossy, expensive magazines, he feels pure pride. She is beautiful with her athletic body and long, black hair. It has been a long road since that small village where she spent her childhood and Sasha has achieved a lot.

Sterling is just different compared to other guys in the team. He has been with his girlfriend since he was fifteen, so friendship with blondest member of the team doesn’t require shameless, disrespecting comments about female bodies. With Jeff everything is simple, he doesn't push Hunter's boundaries or ask too many questions if there is a topic hunter doesn't want to talk about. 

“What’s okay?” Hunter asks lazily, not prepared for Jeff’s answer. They have spent last weeks in shared hotel room and well, Jeff has a tendency to be careless with clothes, sometimes he even sleeps naked if night is warm enough, and has morning coffee sitting on his bed, perfectly ignorant in his pale beauty. Hunter hasn’t ever even kissed another man, and he has been stealing looks, line of his flawless calf, messy bed head in the morning, shape of his brilliant ass... It's just hard to resist when Jeff is there, bubbly and open, easy in Hunter's company. 

"That you like guys. I have seen you, Clarington. I don't care. It's okay." Hunter would like to deny everything he is hearing, but at the same he is tempted to laugh, lose himself in hysteric giggles which would make him stomach ache. It can't be real, but it's also so typical for Sterling. Naturally he would bring up this topic at World Cup final stadium, under eyes of 80 000 loud football fans.  

"I also think you have a huge crush on France's golden boy." Hunter opens his mouth, lies dancing on his tongue, but Sterling smiles raising left corner of his mouth, and leans closer, pressing their thighs and sides together. Apparently his laid-back attitude isn't going to disappear anywhere. "Don't say anything. I don't know if you have noticed, but all your football magazines contain Smythe's interview. At least half of them have him also as their cover boy."

Glimpse of dark blue and brown catches his attention. Smythe has wandered bit closer with two other guys from their team. They are taking selfies, basking in the attention of their fans and enjoying that unique moment. Jeff is right. Hunter has had this silly school boy crush at least for a year and a half. He noticed Smythe first on Instagram, watched pictures of his life with a weird longing inside of his heart. He seems to be so relaxed, at peace with himself and world around him. Smythe doesn't worry about worthless things, and Hunter is jealous about that attitude. Goofy smile didn't leave his face for days when Hunter happened to notice that Smythe had followed him back on Instagram. 

Sebastian Smythe is different. At the age of 21 he is already bright star of his Spanish club and also promising player of Les Bleus. Team has developed a lot since last World Cup and from all the articles Hunter has read - alarmingly many of them were Sebastian’s personal interviews, he knows that European nation hasn’t been waiting for anything less than a medal.

But besides his athletic achievements, also Smythe’s civil life tends to be under a magnifying glass. He isn’t most typical character of the football world, because Smythe is except proud but also very much out. Only few months ago, after lost Champions League game he was spotted with Kurt Hummel for one last time. Hummel escaped from photographers in black, shiny car, and Smythe was left in the atmospheric restaurant with a stony face. They had been a steady couple for over a year, people were waiting for wedding bells, not heart-breaking news about break-up. 

"You should talk to him." Hunter has. Kinda. Or almost. At least in his day dreams. They have bumped into French players in the hotel and between practices and free-time. Smythe has nodded among others, his eyes sharp and intelligent. He seems to be approachable, but idea of actually talking to him is bit too overwhelming. Hunter just shrugs to his friend whose face is so hopeful. 

There is a tall figure waiting for them when Hunter and Jeff get to their hotel room. “Can I get your jersey?” Sebastian Smythe looks almost shy. His English is stiff, there is something carefully practiced in those few words, but Smythe is probably a person who would cover his lacking skills with charming smiles and lively, wild gestures. Gold medal rests on his chest and his left hand is holding dark blue shirt that is now offered to Hunter. Jeff elbows his teammate, annoying smirk painted on his face, and makes sure that he doesn’t leave before some totally inappropriate comment. Hunter pulls his jersey over his head and can’t help smiling when Smythe’s own is offered to him. He is so focused on that gesture that Smythe can map his chest and abs freely. There is a smirk hiding in the corner of his mouth. Fabric is familiar in Hunter's fingers, shirt feels exactly similar as his own. Back of the jersey is covered with name Smythe and big number nine. 

He also wants to take a selfie with "this year's cutest silver-medalist", a picture shows Smythe's casual arm around his shoulders and those lips touching his cheek. 

Eight years later it's Hunter who kisses trophy. He has gorgeous husband in the stands and his absolutely best friend sharing that victory with him. Unfortunate broken leg had kept Sebastian away from this World Cup, but he had still been excited for Hunter, covered his face with little kisses and sent him to the dressing room with hard-on after some promises about later oral activities. 


	70. It's a French kiss, Italian ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even though Sebastian didn’t deserve any flowers, that ass he had been to Hunter for weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://brightsummernights7cf.tumblr.com/post/125821137170/imaginetheotp-imagine-your-otp-has-been-living
> 
> There was another similar thing for this fic, but I can't find it right now, and I'm not even sure if I have tagged it to my own blog. Title is from Brad Paisley's American Saturday Night.

Sebastian is still afraid of weakness. He likes to keep his strong facade as long as posible, pretend that he is invincible and nothing can touch him. Then he fell so damn hard when new boy stepped in choir room, conquered The Warblers and also Sebastian’s heart which used to be icy, locked in his mental strongbox. It didn’t take long from Hunter to figure out Sebastian’s logic towards world, and in the embrace of warm arms Sebastian was told that he didn’t need to be afraid anymore. With Hunter weakness wasn’t dangerous, he took all of it, tears, frustration, and those days when Sebastian didn’t want to talk to anybody, not even Hunter.

All their years together have taught Sebastian to deal with his feelings, but it’s still horrible how memory of that day is haunting him, interrupting his night sleep and making Sebastian clingiest boyfriend ever. At least it’s a little step forward that this time Sebastian doesn’t wake up also his boyfriend when soft tears rolling on his cheeks ruin his sleep. 

Wooden floor is cool against soles of his feet. Sebastian sighs, it feels good to get ouf of bed where thick covers had probably increased his sweaty, irrational panic during that nightmare. It happened three months ago. Sebastian had been tense for days, snapping at things like apple juice in his glass when it should have been orange. Floor of his home office was covered with papers and note cards, and Sebastian almost made mittens of their cat, Artemis when it slipped there and left small, pretty marks of cat paws on some of his material. 

After almost a decade together Hunter was used to it, he knew that ignoring those temperamental flashes was best thing he could do. With finished book, thick pile of paper on his desk, Sebastian would come to look for him, apology painted in the greenness of his eyes. Next few days would be filled with wine, excellent dinners and mind-blowing sex. Sebastian wouldn’t be his usual bossy self, but would allow his body in Hunter’s loving hands trusting him completely. It would be worth the wait and dealing with his exploding nature. 

On that Monday morning Hunter said hello from the doorway of Sebastian’s office. He was writing critical chapter, one of most important ones in whole book, and replied only with a vague grunt, not bothering to get up and kiss his boyfriend’s waiting mouth.

Five hours later Sebastian had biggest regrets of his life. He wandered out of office, almost surprised about sunshine flooding whole apartment. Growling of his stomach reminded Sebastian what he was doing. His regular breakfast was three cups of coffee so at midday his body was already alarming. In refrigerator he found food which Hunter had done previous night. There was a note on the blue lid, wishing good writing day to his own little author.  _I’ll get you flowers later._ Even though Sebastian didn’t deserve any flowers, that ass he had been to Hunter for weeks. 

To get some background noise for his meal, Sebastian opened small television which was located in their kitchen. Hunter liked to watch morning news sitting at counter with his cereal. When something about bad car accident was mentioned, his wandering eyes were immediately pulled towards screen. Pure fear froze Sebastian when they were showing grey Mercedes. Side of the driver was totally crushed, and there was a sickening weight in his stomach. Sebastian recognized that car. Even though it was a basic car, totally not only similar vehicle in the town, he was absolutely sure that this one belonged to his boyfriend. 

It wasn’t Hunter. It was his assistant, naive and innocent Blaine Anderson who always tried to flirt with Sebastian’s man. So many times extremely possessive Sebastian was sitting on Hunter’s lap, eager to do some shameless things in his office, and poor Blaine was following the scene at the other side of Hunter’s desk. "You are mine", he breathed in Hunter's ear, leaving red mark on his skin. "Only mine."

"I love to be." It was secretly flattering to see how much Sebastian cared. He had strong emotions, but was also aware of limits, so it wasn't ever too much and creepy.  

Sebastian drove there mindlessly. He couldn't get information about accident and when absence of his phone was clear, Sebastian just leaned against steering wheel of his car, and cried helplessly. His fear didn't convince them, those people just wanted Sebastian out of the way. "Oh my fucking god", Hunter mumbled when he was told about accident. It was little bit shameful, but first worry in his mind was Sebastian, not his dead assistant. He had quite good idea of it how Sebastian would react if he heard the news before Hunter would reach him. It was exactly as bad as he thought. When Hunter got home, there was a crying lump in their bed. Sebastian had curled up on Hunter's side, hands squeezing his pillow like an anchor. 

Next few hours he spent sitting next to him. "I'm not dead. I'm here. I borrowed my car to him, he had some business in the downtown. Other driver was drunk. We are okay. I'm okay." Slowly, tortuously slowly Sebastian calmed down. "I have been so bitchy. I can't... What if it would have been you...? I'm horrible boyfriend, Hunt. I didn't even kiss you. I took you for granted, I didn't ever say thank you when you made food or handled my at my worst."

“Can’t you sleep, babe?” Hunter's words return Sebastian to current time where it's three am, and he isn't sleeping. Quiet feet approach him and then small kiss is pressed on his messy hair. Sebastian had been in the kitchen, watching full moon, and sipping hot chocolate slowly. “Go back to bed”, Sebastian commands. “You have work to do tomorrow. You don’t have to look like a panda there even though I have problems.”

"Work isn't more important than you. Just talk to me, Sebastian."

“I just keep thinking about it... If you would have been there, on your death bed, I wouldn’t have been allowed inside. I would have waited there and you would have died alone. Marriage comes to my mind nearly every day, but somehow I don’t wanna give in. I don’t need a piece of paper and a pretty ring to tell that you are only real thing in my life I take completely seriously.”

"I'm here. I wasn't on my death bed at any point. Sweetheart you have to leave this behind. It's torturing you."

After previous night Hunter knows that Sebastian wouldn’t take news well. He stands in the kitchen, their supposed dinner and pieces of a plate on the floor. Looks like he would order pizza after this talk. Sebastian is ghostly pale, his eyes full of brutal agony. “You are leaving? For whole week?”

He hates to sound like a scared child, but can’t help dramatic reaction. Sebastian walks to the kitchen window, trying to calm his breathing and focus on the things outside. “I just don’t know how to do it without you. I have already enough problems with sleeping”, he confesses, leaning against body behind him. "I know babe. Nobody knows it better than me. But it's important, I can't pass this trip. I'll drown you in fancy gifts when I get back. It's even on same damn time zone, so I can call you whenever I have time. We can have phone sex if you want. I don't know how to be sexy when I don't see your pretty face and cock, but I can try. For you."

That earns a smile from Sebastian. "I'll try", he promises. 

They have a Skype date every night. Sebastian lies on their bed, face pale from sleep dept and upper body covered in one of Hunter’s sweaters. “How was your day?” Hunter asks softly. He is worried, index finger touching laptop screen like he could brush Sebastian’s skin. His figure on the screen looks absent-minded. Sebastian blinks and tells something about a phone call with his manager. Book is selling well. 

“I’m sorry I’m such a difficult baby”, Sebastian mutters. He is looking for a comfortable position, hands pressing Hunter’s own pillow. “Seventeen years old me would laugh at this. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love or get attached. I had me and that was enough back then.

“You are not too difficult, I promise sweetheart.” Hunter watches Sebastian who lies in the bed, tells insignificant facts of his day in an attempt to get Sebastian lost in his soothing voice. He looks weary, but not enough, Sebastian doesn’t stay in one position, he turns to his left side, and then right one until blankets are messy ball around him. “Can you sing?”

Hunter clears his throat and obeys, his voice travelling through internet connection. He knows it doesn’t compliment his abilities, but Sebastian doesn’t care. He gets instantly softer, body staying in one position. Hunter finishes song and sings other one. After that Sebastian is clearly sleeping, half of his face buried in the pillow. “I love you”, Hunter mumbles quietly, his fingers once again touching laptop screen.

They repeat that ritual until Hunter’s return. On last evening of his trip Hunter is sure about his decision. He would marry this man. He doesn’t have a ring, not flowers or cheesy talk. But he would buy Sebastian any ring he would want if he only said yes. When they meet at the air-port, Hunter drops his luggage and runs towards his boyfriend who is waiting for him with open arms. People watch them, curious or amused expressions on their faces. Emotional meetings aren't anything new at the air-port, but there is something really feverish in those two. 

“I want to marry you.” It’s whispered in Sebastian’s neck where his scent is so strong. Hunter inhales it, knowing that home is where this man is. He feels vibrations in the body against his own when Sebastian laughs. “So romantic, Hunter. You are dusty from flight, somebody has spilled their drink on your jacket and there you are, fussing about marriage. You are asking my body and mind, but did you even bring souvenirs?"

"I did. And used lots of money to buy them."

For a moment he is almost worried. He knows Sebastian's impatient and snarky side. Right now he doesn't sound like a man who would say yes to anybody's proposal. Younger Sebastian was a big fan of freedom, laughed at his friends who dared to mention idea of a life-time partner. But then those lips are looking for his own. Fingers are so gentle in his hear. Now words aren't important, he reads answer from Sebastian's behaviour, his suddenly peaceful body and passion of their kiss. 

 


	71. I wanna kiss you in the parking lot, under the moonlight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All of them can’t have rare fairytale romance and perfect wedding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Arranged marriage AU. Title borrowed from Michael Ray.

On the cover of blue portfolio smiles Sebastian’s handsome future husband. His slow eyes find blueness in his gaze, fullness of his lips and generally pleasant face. At least he is attractive, and he is a guy which is most important thing. Sebastian couldn’t handle this at all if his parents demanded him to marry a female. Behind the cover he finds ten pages filled with pedantic, small handwriting. Hunter has added photos too, in one of them he smiles with a brown horse, cheeks red from exercising. It’s such a nice picture, trees at the background have golden and orange leaves, wind has messed with Hunter’s hair, and his thighs look really good in tight, cream-coloured pants. Sebastian only hopes that he wouldn’t be invited to a romantic riding trip.

“Hot”, Jeff sighs behind Sebastian, his voice somehow hopeful. Not so long ago Sebastian had made a miscalculation. His parents had listened to his suggestion, and contacted Sterlings only to hear that Jeff’s husband had been already found. Damn Nick Duval had been faster than him. After those long phone discussions Jeff had assumed things almost dangerously. His pretty, bright head was carrying the idea that Sebastian was head over heels for his best friend, and rejection had hurt feelings he surely has behind that icy facade. It was fixed in a discussion which Sebastian doesn’t want to remember, because he hasn’t ever been that open for anybody, but after that Sebastian’s future has become Jeff’s biggest passion. 

Jeff himself is already carrying a ring, pretty silvery thing. His head is filled with wedding plans and few nights earlier he had giggled about wedding night and sex, told his worries in nervous, wet voice. Room was almost completely dark, when Sebastian held him close and allowed Jeff to pour all those things against his collarbone. “You don’t have to do anything if you don’t want. I know all of it is pretty fucked up, but I promise it’s going to be okay."

Sexual encounters are mostly saved for wedding night. Peck on Nick’s cheek had been almost daring, and made both boys blush. That unsaid rule Sebastian has broken at least partially. He has kissed teenager boys who didn’t know where to put their hands. In one unforgettable night he was kneeling between other guy’s legs. Green eyes watered when boy with golden, thick hair pushed his cock too deep too fast, but Sebastian didn’t really care. On that moment he felt really alive. 

“Yeah”, Sebastian mutters, his eyes flying on the lines Hunter has filled. He likes working out, cats and old detective stories. Horseback riding had been that one time, because he is always open for new experiences in athletic world. Replies paint a picture of responsible and little bit uptight young man who hasn’t had most interesting life. Sebastian could bring light and excitement to his life, he doesn’t doubt that, but there is still wariness in his stomach. It’s real now. After that failed marriage offer he had been able to push this issue away from his mind, but now it’s too late. At the delicate age of nineteen Sebastian would step into an arranged marriage with this person he hasn’t ever meet, and wouldn’t probably meet before his wedding day. It’s already marked in his calendar, red circle has been drawn around the date, sixteen days after his birthday. Hunter is a week older than him.

“He is a good boy”, his mother interrupts. Anybody who sees her at work, in a law firm wearing black pencil skirts and handling things with an attitude which scares her enemies couldn’t believe that Carolyn Smythe can be this gentle. But her only child and son has always been Carolyn’s soft spot. “Your father knows Hunter’s father from work. He is really excited to start married life with you.”

So they respected his wishes _it has to be a guy, I guess I can get that much,_ but kept also their possible personal benefits in mind.

Next week ring is sent. It’s almost hidden under all his other mail, only flash of gift wrapping paper catches his attention. Jeff steps into room when Sebastian’s hand is shaking above trashcan. It’s overwhelming, he can’t handle it alone. Everything is about to change and when he would put that thing on his finger, people wouldn’t see him in old way. Gently blond boy steals small box from his hand, and pulls Sebastian to his own bed. His calves meet side of the bed and brunette sits down, teeth abusing his bottom lip.

For Sebastian’s surprise Jeff pulls a pocket flask from the bottom drawer of his desk. It’s a fancy, silvery thing, Jeff’s initials engraved on the smooth surface. “Drink”, he commands almost angrily, eye brows tight lines above his wide eyes. Sebastian takes a quick sip, enjoying burning peace leaking to his whole body.

Meanwhile Jeff’s dexterous fingers have opened the box. Sunshine dances on the ring’s deep gold, and Sebastian is wondering if he should pull trashcan closer. “Looks expensive”, blond comments, his eyes finding all the anxiety from Sebastian’s face.

It’s expensive, flamboyant and totally wrong ring for Sebastian. He is awkwardly aware of the ring all the time. In boring classes he finds himself examining piece of jewelry which has changed his whole existence.

“There are rules, you know”, Jeff reminds on misty Sunday morning when they are jogging on the track. Sebastian glances at him and just keeps going, his running shoes meeting ground in steady rhythm. It’s just coping, he doesn’t care about Jeff and Jeff’s rules. All of them can’t have rare fairytale romance and perfect wedding. But his friend is stubborn. “You don’t like it. You don’t have to wear it. Hunter may have taken first step and sent that ring, but nothing demands you to accept it.”

A month later Sebastian receives new ring box, wrapped in golden paper. This ring is simpler, just beautiful silver around his finger, and this time there is a note accompanying Hunter’s gift. He has written just few lines, but promise about choosing engravings together makes Sebastian immediately calmer. In the privacy of his room Sebastian presses his lips on the ring, feeling weird pride and curiosity. It’s still terrifying but with those simple words Hunter had shown that he is a real person.

Only six months before his own there is a wedding on the beach. Sebastian is with his best friend when he hides behind the tent, trying to stop tears from falling on his face. He is just overwhelmed, nervous and happy, and all those emotions are too much to handle. Sebastian is holding shaking wrists and finds his brown eyes. “Go to wash your face, babe. We can wait for you five more minutes. It doesn’t matter.” Simple kiss on his forehead brings back Jeff’s sunny smile. “You will rock his world.”

Sebastian has a place near wedding couple, next to his mother. When they are still waiting for Jeff, Carolyn Smythe tugs his sleeve. “Amanda and her son. Do you want to say hello later?” Sebastian follows route of her nod and finds only possible people. Mrs. Clarington is petite in her blue dress, sandy brown hair in a flawless bun. Person next to her has similar hair and his shoulders look strong under well-cut jacket. “No, I don’t think so.”

Wedding is yellow and white, and for a moment Sebastian regrets letting his mother and Amanda Clarington plan this day. General impression is pale. Those colours, little yellow and pink cupcakes, and white bows have nothing to do with Sebastian himself. He is also pretty sure that Hunter doesn’t count pink in his favourite colours. But all that ugliness is quickly forgiven and forgotten when Sebastian’s eyes find a young man who is waiting for him, looking surprisingly calm even though 200 eyes don’t leave his figure.

Door is closed behind them, and Sebastian closes his eyes, waiting for violent push against the wall. Sebastian had seen tight muscles under Hunter’s pale yellow shirt. He couldn’t defend himself if his husband decided to just take his own. For whole day protective, wondering hand had been touching him, fingers holding his own when Sebastian had said his yes, and same touch studying form of his back through party and dinner. During the meal they had fed each other cake with trembling hands. Sebastian had see only adoration when he had dared to look in his husband’s eyes properly, but he is still suspicious like a wild horse. 

Hunter steals a look, then watches him with braver eyes, thick feeling nearly hiding almost childish surprise in them. “I know you don’t believe it, but this feels like a best day of my life.” Sebastian snorts, that’s little bit too straightforward. "I always thought my parents had other plans for me. When I saw your portfolio and noticed how high our score was... And those pictures. Damn beautiful, I jerked off twice that night. I just want to make you happy." 

There is something defensive inside of Sebastian. He doesn't like it when people are showing all their cards immediately. Hunter is too bright, too open and looks at him like an innocent child even though some of his words were far from innocent. Sebastian just wants to find something to do because he wouldn't ever open his heart so easily. That's why wine bottle is opened. They are stuck together for the rest of their lives, only something massive like domestic violence or death could separate them now, so it would be only wise to try to get along.  

Sebastian lets Hunter taste wine from his lips. At first he uses too much force, showing clearly that experimenting hasn’t been his thing. But Sebastian pulls back and tries again, teaching Hunter how to follow his rhythm. He is gloriously drunk, would like to wrap his leg around his husband, and feel and touch and feel until they both would be worn out, too tired to move single muscle. But it's too much for them both right now so they just fall asleep together, facing each other. Sebastian snuggles as close as possible, breathing same air with his husband. There, under their shared comforter he feels warm and safe. Hunter doesn't react when his forehead is kissed, sleep is already deep. 


	72. Baby let me hear you say oh, oh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It starts with smooth, grey and blue stones, and pink feathers in the pockets of his jacket."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had such an awesome day yesterday, maybe one of the best ever. 
> 
> And this fic is some kind of magical AU. I guess there are really tiny Harry Potter-vibes. Title from Michael Ray's song Kiss you in the morning.
> 
> Good luck charms and drawings under the bed from some of those prompt blogs, but unfortunately I don't have links anymore.

It starts with smooth, grey and blue stones, and pink feathers in the pockets of his jacket. Hunter doesn’t understand where they are coming from. First he considers just throwing them away, dropping stones on the front yard of his apartment building, and letting wind take feathers. But something tells him no. Hunter takes stones inside and collects them in a row to his window sill. Them are always warm, even on the rainiest or snowiest day stones are summer day memories in his fingers.

That thing with his boyfriend was supposed to be just a fling, but after examining physical side of their relationship very thoroughly, Hunter notices that he doesn't want to let Sebastian go. “I guess I can tolerate you a little longer”, dark-haired man tells after plate of cookies and lazy sex on the sofa. Hunter is still close, their bodies pressed together and his lips peppering Sebastian’s neck with small kisses.  _I love you_ , he almost mumbles but that would definitely scare away this weird creature who is so full of fire. Instead of that it's brisk  _I want you so much_ and Sebastian follows plot of the play immediately. 

Sebastian always keeps his eyes shut when they are having sex. He trusts his body to Hunter’s hands, doesn’t even shiver when knots and scarfs take away change to move his hands. He is relaxed and open weight, small smile curving his lips when Hunter pounds into him, filthy words and groans filling dusty air in the room.

On one day Hunter wants to see his eyes, wants to get familiar with the look in them when Sebastian comes only from his cock. Sebastian swallows thickly, he has difficulties to register those words when pleasure is sweaty and thick from his toes to his scalp. “Open your eyes, beautiful”, Hunter whispers again, keeping himself still even though it asks all of his self-control. 

When they are finally opened, Sebastian’s usually sensual, green eyes are only empty, flawless sapphire. Spell of sexual pleasure is broken when Hunter backs off, pulling a whimper of pain from Sebastian. "Hunt, oh fuck Hunt. Don't go, babe." His voice is begging. In different situation it could be kinda triumphant if it was about something harmless, something normal arguing couple shit, not his boyfriend's eyes changing colour like in fucking Supernatural. 

Sebastian reaches him at the door of kitchen. Hunter's fingers are wrapped around handle of the kitchen knife. He doesn't understand what is happening, but instincts tell him that possible man of his life is potentially dangerous. Open palm of a hand is offered to him, and there is something horribly flat in Sebastian's smile. ”This is useless, babe. I'm not in danger, you aren't a threat. Among normal human beings you are amazing, so strong and bright, but I could disarm you with one word. You can go if you want that. But if there is even small change that you'd like to talk about this... Please, babe. I don't want to lose this and you.”

Tentatively Hunter sits at kitchen table, dropping knife from his hand. Shake of his head warns Sebastian when he tries to touch Hunter's bare arm. It looks kinda ridiculous. Both of them are still butt naked, remains of sexual moment on their skins and lips. Sebastian's eyes are very dark, and Hunter remembers fingers and his cock, Sebastian's small moans and his soft trust. 

“I’m not... I’m not normal, I haven’t ever been.”

 “I might have already figured out that much.”

“You are hot, and it’s too much. I can mostly control my magic perfectly, but during sex it has always been a challenge. Usually my eyes betray me.”

Hunter asks about feather and stones, suddenly sure that Sebastian knows what he is talking about. He chuckles, embarrassed roses colouring his pale cheeks. "Good luck charms, babe. I’m not a bad person, Hunter. I’m not any real life Voldemort. I’m just a guy with special, rare talent.”

In the comforting darkness of the night he listens to Sebastian's very reasonable comments. “If I wanted to harm you, I would have done it months ago. It's so lonely life sometimes, Hunt. You are my treasure, light of my life.” His thumb is moving on Hunter's hip bone, but touch hasn't even seen anything sexual. It feels like Sebastian would want to protect him, and there, that long and lean body wrapped around him Hunter feels protected. "Shut up", he mutters softly, turning around in Sebastian's grip. "Just shut up."

When time passes, magic starts to feel natural. He comes to his boyfriend's door, but it's opened without anybody behind the door. On Valentine's Day he is bribed with roses which don't fade even though time passes. Blue and white petals are forever. At abandoned lake Sebastian changes colour of the water, entertaining Hunter with pink waves. "Is this... Is this safe?" he asks clumsily when they step into water, warmth licking his hips. Kiss, two, three, deep voice purring in his ear and fingers reaching his most sensitive places. "I'll keep you safe."

Hunter is already annoyed by his horrible day, horrible week, horrible month and generally horrible life. He is wondering if it would be wiser to cancel their weekend date, because right now Hunter isn’t sure if he could be a good boyfriend at all, and he wouldn’t like to make Sebastian victim of his even shorter nerves than usually. When sound of the doorbell cuts the silence in his apartment, Hunter is willing to cry. He is lying on his bed, seeking comfort from Sebastian's scent in his pillows. Hunter is too tired, he just wants to disappear from whole world, including also his boyfriend. 

When he gets on his shaking feet, something under the bed catches his attention. Blue lines are hard to separate from dark, wooden floor, but forms of symbols make him shake. It's not a surprise that Hunter doesn't know what's going on. So much of Sebastian's own world is still unknown to him. 

He makes assumptions, manages to convince himself that Sebastian hasn't been honest, that he is dangerous and has been doing god knows what in Hunter's own bedroom. He is insulted because even though their relationship is tight, Sebastian is as necessary part of his days as morning coffee or shower right before bed, that significant step hasn't been taken yet. Hunter's apartment and especially his bedroom is his intimate, private personal space. 

Sebastian's face falls when Hunter yells at him, lets out all his insecurity and most horrible assumptions. After that he is empty with raw throat, his eyes looking for comfort and forgiveness from his boyfriend. Hurt and anger are boiling on his face. For the first time Hunter notices magic affecting Sebastian's looks. Smooth, tanned skin is now like white marble. He hasn't ever seen Sebastian this angry, and knows that other man is just barely keeping it together. No matter how anger burns is in his veins, Sebastian has one promise he wants to keep. Hunter couldn’t be damaged. His power wouldn’t be used against other man. "I think it's better if I go now. It's not good idea to continue this discussion." When he has left, Hunter finds burns from the floor. Without Sebastian's self-control those burns could be on his skin, so there is nothing real to complain about. 

“How did it look like?” Jeff asks calmly, and takes a sip of his drink. When Hunter put it on the table, there wasn’t whipped cream in dark beverage, but maybe it’s better to stay quiet about that. His life used to be so much simpler before he got to know these people who are living on the dark side of normalcy. Also Jeff's hair has changed its colour during those few minutes when Hunter was away from living room. Mostly his head is typical platinum blond, but some locks on the left have gotten darker, golden shade. Of course there is also Jeff’s kitten resting on his thighs and glaring at Hunter with wide, blue eyes. He hopes that tiny animal keeps its wings hidden, seeing kitten floating in the air had almost caused him a small heart attack.

Hunter takes his calendar and tries to draw symbols as well as he remembers them. One glance at the page tells Jeff enough and earns Hunter most poisonous look he has ever received. “It was drawn with blue, I suppose?You fucking idiotic bastard. I’m sure you didn’t even give him a change to explain. You just thought you were righteous, and better than him like always. Why have you even bothered to date Sebastian when your trust and love have so weak base?” Jeff shakes his head and his resentment affects also creamy kitten. Hunter watches with slight nausea how small animal spreads black wings, and shows tiny fangs to the person who had annoyed its owner.

“Those symbols were meant to protect your sleep and keep you in good health. Strengthening them asks lots of energy and complicated spells. Sebastian used his own blood to keep you safe, and likely you don’t know at all how even little wound can affect people like me and Sebastian.”

Hunter remembers hazy Sunday mornings. He had a gorgeous, naked man in his bed, but all Hunter’s suggestions were pushed away. Sebastian didn’t want breakfast – smell of pancakes gave his face interesting green shade, he didn’t want to go out for a refreshing walk, and even longing fingers on his bare thigh, almost reaching for his cock made Sebastian scowl with a clear warning on his face. He didn’t see wounds, but that doesn’t mean that Sebastian wasn’t hiding one or two from him.

He is in their favourite place, sitting on the rock on small, private beach where sand is white and people are a rare sight. Hunter has always been pretty sure that Sebastian’s wild, primal talent has had something to do with that luxurious peace.

With a smile on his face Hunter follows how Sebastian plays with water and waves. On so many summer nights he had entertained Hunter by creating characters of the water. Horses had run in the peaceful waves and dolphin had jumped from the water throwing splashes of ice cold liquid on the couple. But when Sebastian’s hot, restless lips conquered his own, Hunter didn’t care. Very often Sebastian’s kisses happened in a hurry, he wanted to touch as much skin as possible.

“I’m sorry”, he peeps. That’s all he can say before watery tiger attacks from the lake pushing Hunter to the ground with violenct force. But at the same time there is an invisible power preventing him from hitting his head. Hunter has couple of aching spots when he gets to his feet, but softness in Sebastian’s eyes is something he had hoped to see.

 “You thought I was worshipping dark powers. My grandparents died in the battles against darker wizards and witches than you can ever imagine. Lots of Smythe blood has been given so also you could live in a world where magical people don’t enslave normal people.”

Sebastian’s words are sharp and judging, but his hands and shivering body are looking for Hunter’s strenght. Both of them are soaked, Sebastian watered by autumn rain and Hunter still carrying remains of watery wild cat. He climbs to the rock, wrapping himself around Sebastian’s body. For a moment Sebastian only clutches him tight, but then he is attacked by a reminder that Hunter doesn’t carry extra powers which would heal his possible pneumonia in a blink. With a tap of his hands small fire is created, and in a tight hug Hunter can feel how magic slowly dries his clothes. "I know I should have told. I kinda understand why you freaked out. I just... You are so important, and in my eyes you are also fragile. I can't be there watching you all the time, and I was worried."

"Move in with me." Green eyes are surprised and dark from emotions.


End file.
